Wave-Touched, page 15
His gaze moved back to his hand, and he brushed his thumb over the curve of her hip. “But you were judging me, weren’t you? Tell me, is it his Vanrian blood that makes him acceptable to you? Those pointed ears I always wished for?” His fingers curled into the fabric of her dressing gown and started slowly gathering it up.
This was only a nightmare. It had to be. Some horrible imagining brought by the sedative and the stress of the day. Veyl squeezed her eyes shut. The drug welcomed her into the darkness, offering her the sanctuary of its embrace.
The blade tapped her neck. “We are still talking. It would be exceptionally rude to fall asleep.” He ran his fingertips up the side of her now exposed thigh.
She looked at him, pleading with her eyes and her words. “Please don’t.”
“Shh.” The dagger pressed harder, the definition of its edge distinct against her skin. He brought his other hand down, resting his fingers on the inside of her thigh now. A chilling hunger sparked in his eyes. “I wonder what else you’ve given him.”
Veyl was trembling now, a few tears slipping free. Where was the crackle of energy? The power that overwhelmed her when she least wanted it to couldn’t seem to break past the fog subduing her when she needed it most.
He brought his hand up then, his fingertips brushing one breast before moving to wipe away the tear sliding over the bridge of her nose. “I won’t do that to you. Not like this. I still love you, after all, so here’s what we’re going to do. You won’t mention this little chat to anyone, and I will, for now, not tell anyone what I saw in that room.” He brushed her hair back from her face, the cold calculation in his eyes killing any affection that might have come across in the gentle touch. “How I saw Kyril force himself on you, using his Charmer and Evoker to make you believe you wanted it. I wonder how desperately you want to keep that secret.”
Panic sent a jolt through the fog, but it still wasn’t enough to shake it off. It would be one thing to say she and Kyril had kissed, but to suggest that she had been an unwilling participant, manipulated by them, would get all three of them executed.
He forced her chin up with the edge of the blade and tapped his temple with one finger. “Keep in mind, if you say anything and Evokers get involved, what I saw in that room today is a death sentence for your Feral. Do we understand each other?”
Not to mention the effect the sedative would have, muddling and calling into question any memories they pulled from her mind of this encounter. She swallowed. “Yes.”
“Wonderful. Consider what you’re doing, Veyl. Remember who your tehnaak is. Remember who embraced you in Deepwater and who hurt you there.”
She squeezed her eyes shut when he leaned in and kissed her, his lips warm and unwelcome against hers. Then he pulled her covers back over her and climbed out through the window, taking the dagger with him. She wiped at her lips forcefully enough to make the healing split bleed again. After that, she curled onto her other side, drawing the blankets up to her ear to cover her neck, silent tears falling until the sedative dragged her back under.
***
Early the next morning, Gannon arrived with Iyvalin and Ahrin following protectively along behind him, the two still keeping a close eye on him in the wake of Lorek’s death. He invited her to spar, and despite the burn on her wrist and the lingering grogginess from the sedative, Veyl accepted. She had no desire to be alone in her rooms even a minute longer.
Jaysen’s nocturnal visit had left her shaken. Between the distracting pain of the bracer over her bandages and her nightmare encounter with her former tehnaak playing back repeatedly in her head, she found herself on the losing side of several rounds before Gannon lowered his sword, his brow furrowing, and approached her.
“You know what, I’m not feeling this today, and I get the distinct impression you aren’t either.” He put an arm around her shoulders. “How about we have a little something to eat and relax before they drag you off to negotiations again?”
“That sounds nice.” She gave him a grateful look as he turned her toward the palace.
He pulled her closer as they walked, lowering his voice so no one else would hear. “If you need to talk, I’ll listen.”
Guilt tied knots in her gut. She settled her arm around his waist and leaned into him a little. “I should be the one supporting you right now.”
He breathed a humorless laugh. “I could use the distraction of someone else’s misery. Besides, given how much of our lives you’ve put up with me being a horse’s ass to you, I feel like I owe you something.”
“You haven’t—”
“You don’t need to lie to me. Losing…” He fell silent, swallowing a few times before he found his voice again. “I’ve done a lot of looking at myself and the people around me lately. To think I might drive off someone important to me now that I know how easily they could be taken away…”
“I understand.”
After a few thoughtful hours spent in the company of old friends, Veyl mustered the courage to call together the Thaelian group. She had them brought to the rather sparsely furnished meeting room where they had met the first time. It had no hidden areas in which someone might conceal themselves. There were plenty of nooks a mouse might spy from, but she didn’t fear that as much now. Besides, Kyril would be on alert for such intrusions.
When she joined them, he moved to kiss her, and she evaded him.
His brow furrowed. “Is everything all right?”
“Yes,” she lied, avoiding his eyes. “My lip just hurts.”
“It does look as if it may have taken another hit sparring.” He took her hand and examined the bandages. “It’s likely the blisters also broke out there. You should have it cleaned and redressed.”
At least he wasn’t trying to chastise her for choosing to spar while injured. She appreciated that. What she didn’t appreciate was the looming dread that Jaysen could choose to destroy everything at any moment. It made her nauseous in their company. The three Thaelian’s lives hung upon the whim of a man she had thought she knew until last night. It turned out she didn’t know him at all. Not anymore.
“It’s fine.”
He caught Jinau’s eye and gestured toward the door with a jerk of his head. The Charmer walked over and leaned out, asking the guards to call for a healer to see to Veyl’s burn.
Kyril shifted closer, bringing his lips up next to her ear. “Something’s wrong.”
“Now isn’t the time,” she whispered.
He stepped back, those piercing silver-blue eyes searching hers.
Veyl turned away, going to sit at the table with Nalika, who was far less likely to care that something had upset her. “I apologize for calling you together a little late today. We should discuss the responses we may get from the Vanrian council and how we wish to handle them.”
Kyril didn’t join them right away. He watched Ceris sit beside her and push his nose up under her arm. Veyl’s throat seized as she sank her hand into his odd fur, and she feared for a moment that she would break down in front of them. Then, a sense of comfort and confidence moved through her. She drew a careful breath and let it out, regaining control.
Kyril gave a slight nod and sat at the table.
With something else to focus on, the time passed quickly. The twins’ mother, Tath, also one of the palace healers, dropped in to tend the burn. The blisters had burst during the sparring session. She chastised Veyl for trying to fight with the injury, warning her it might not heal as well now, and that they would need to watch it for infection.
When it came time to join the Vanrian council, Veyl’s gut twisted into a thousand knots, the snakes of dread multiplying more every second. She didn’t want to see Jaysen. The idea of simply being in the same building as him was upsetting enough, even in a structure as vast as the palace. When she stood to leave the small meeting room, the room spun, and she braced herself against the table to catch her balance.
Kyril placed a steadying hand on her arm.
Jinau considered her with a deepening frown. “You look pale, Seh’hali.”
She glanced at the ahndhomen, a moment of opportunity flashing through her mind. Perhaps she could beg off as feeling unwell. But no, Jaysen would know why she wasn’t there. Would it please him to know how deeply his actions had distressed her? Would he regret it? Or might her avoidance prompt him to act on his threat? It was far too likely that hiding from him would make the situation worse.
“I’ll be fine.” She had to focus. With three Evokers in the negotiation room, she couldn’t afford to let the source of her distress dominate her thoughts. Not that she hadn’t been working until now to avoid revealing her relationship with Kyril, but this would add an additional layer of difficulty. Was Jaysen skilled enough at managing his thoughts to hide all of this from them? Would they even bother paying attention to him when they had the Thaelians to monitor?
When they reached the meeting room, Veyl hung back, waiting to enter behind the other three so she might have a moment to try spotting the source of her upset before going in.
“Good afternoon, Khesran.”
Jaysen’s voice behind her made her breath catch and her stomach clench. For an instant, she feared she might throw up. If she did, perhaps she could at least do so on him the way she had vomited on Kyril’s boots on the voyage to Thaelis. She stepped quickly to the side to move away from him, lightning crackling to life in her chest as she noticed that, sometime since his visit last night, he had cut his hair shorter in a Sarketi style.
Across the room, Arhk’s attention snapped to her, abandoning whatever conversation he had been having with Dhomen Nevias. He leaned to his left to whisper something to his Evoker, Zafyr, whose gaze moved to Veyl as well.
“Afternoon, Prince Jaysen.” Veyl forced the words out, happy that her lunch didn’t follow them. She clamped down on her ability and hurried to join the others.
When they were all seated, her mother addressed them. “The council has reached a decision. We agree that most of the terms you presented are reasonable, with a few slight adjustments. We insist on the addition of three Vanrian advisors to the new council in Thaelis whose roles will be to provide guidance primarily on matters that might affect the safety of Vanris and its territories, or that run any risk of encroaching upon the rights and freedoms of the citizens therein. Regarding military presence, we will, as requested, establish only a single military base on the main island. The appointed advisors will be responsible for determining whether there is a need for more over the course of the first year, at the end of which we will reconvene to discuss the matter. They will also assess trade needs and what goods might be worth transporting to or from the mainland in cooperation with the rest of the new Thaelian council. You may take a moment if you wish to speak among yourselves before you respond.”
Veyl focused on the words and on the subtle reactions of the three Thaelians. With Ceris once again linking her and Kyril, she got a faint sense of resignation. It was more oversight and involvement than they wanted, but ultimately less than they had expected. She glanced at each of them, keeping her gaze low as she turned to the right to avoid seeing Jaysen. Their subtle nods were enough, though she noted the tightness of Nalika’s jaw. Of them all, the Evoker was the least happy about it, but she had dealt with Arhk and Zafyr, two of the most intimidating individuals in the room, on the day their parents arranged for people to talk with them in private. It was no wonder she was less comfortable than the other two.
“While we would prefer less direct involvement, we will accept your proposed changes for the sake of establishing a connection between the people of Vanris and Thaelis that will hopefully benefit all of us.” A weight lifted from Veyl’s shoulders as she said it. It was done. If only Jaysen hadn’t become a greater burden, his threats bearing down on her chest and threatening to suffocate her.
Ceris nudged her hand with his nose. The gesture, meant to bring comfort, mostly sparked an instant of panic as she remembered to push such thoughts into the background. A glance around at the two Evokers on the Vanrian side assured her their focus wasn’t on her at that moment. She couldn’t look at Nalika without being obvious about it, so she hoped for the best.
Her mother inclined her head slightly, her eyes sweeping across the Thaelian side of the table. “Very well. We will have agreements written up as discussed for your review and signatures in the morning, after which we can begin planning our approach to Thaelis and action against the current Thaelian leadership. This evening, we invite you to join us for a feast to celebrate the closing of these negotiations.”
That sounded positive up front, but when they gathered in the larger dining hall, the rest of her father’s tehsheyn, as well as the twins and Tavin and Ellaris joined them, and Veyl’s usual spot in the corner next to Jaysen awaited her. At the start of the meal, she focused intently on her food, relieved when Jethan asked her questions about Thaelis, giving her an excuse to ignore the source of her discomfort for a while. When Jethan’s attention moved elsewhere, she stared into her plate, trying to keep her thoughts on the meal and the coming military action in Thaelis.
“Khemron Kasiel, you and Khevarin Velara must be quite relieved,” Jaysen said, drawing her parents’ attention.
“How do you mean?” her father asked.
“Now that the Thaelians are technically citizens of Vanris, and we are moving on from negotiations, there is no need for Veyl to continue meeting with them in private.” He nodded to the three Thaelians who had been given places on the far side of the table. “We will all be fighting on the same side from now on.”
“That is an excellent point,” her mother smiled fondly at her. “Now that we are working together, you can assume your proper role as a khesran of Vanris. That should take some of the burden off your shoulders.”
Under the table, Jaysen’s hand touched her leg.
Veyl tensed, fighting the sudden urge to kick him or throw up. Maybe both. She set down her fork, any appetite she’d had abandoning her, and began folding her napkin.
“Yes, it is a relief that we can move forward,” she answered. She stood, an action that unfortunately drew everyone’s gaze to her. Forcing a smile, she said, “Excuse me. My wrist is quite painful this evening. I’m going to retire a little early. Please enjoy the rest of your meal.”
“I told you it was a poor choice to spar with it like that.” Tath’s sympathetic smile softened her words.
“It’s my fault,” Gannon offered in her defense. “I shouldn’t have encouraged her. You know she can’t resist a bit of friendly competition.”
“If you need anything, let us know,” her mother said, fine lines furrowing the subtle ke’hanoath tattoo on her brow.
Her father regarded her thoughtfully, his gaze searching. “And you are more than welcome to rejoin us later if you find yourself feeling up for it.”
“Thank you,” she answered as graciously as she could, deliberately not looking at Kyril, Jaysen, or any of the Evokers in the room.
Nerith stood, setting her napkin on the table. “I’ll come with you. We can change that bandage and add some fresh salve. That might help.”
“No,” Veyl protested. “You should stay and enjoy the evening.”
“I insist.”
Resigned, Veyl left the room, relieved to at least get away from Jaysen. She returned to her chambers alone while Nerith went to collect the supplies she needed. It was stuffy inside. She had closed and latched all the windows that morning. Knowing Jaysen would probably stay at dinner for some time, she dared to open one in the sitting room and another in the bedroom, resenting the roiling in her gut that accompanied that process.
When Nerith returned, they sat on the couch together, and the healer began removing the wound dressing.
“You seem unsettled today.” She set the soiled bandages aside and gently cleaned the injury. “Is everything all right?”
Veyl stared at her wrist, afraid Nerith would somehow see the truth in her eyes. “I had nightmares last night on the sedative. I think I’ll try to manage without it tonight?”
“With the wound this raw, I doubt you’ll get any rest. A stronger dose might help you sleep more soundly.”
“No!”
Nerith pulled back from the vehemence in her refusal, and Veyl drew a deep breath, closing her eyes to try finding some calm in the darkness. Where was the ocean in that darkness, the soothing crash of the waves? A hand touched her shoulder, and she startled, eyes snapping open.
Nerith’s brow furrowed. “Veyl, are you all right?”
“I’m fine. There’s just been so much stress lately. I’m sure I’ll sleep better now that the negotiations have wrapped up.” She hated making it sound as if she were unequal to the task of managing those political responsibilities, but she could think of nowhere else to lay the blame that wouldn’t inspire more questions.
“All right. I’ll leave a dose of the sedative here in case you end up needing it.”
There was a knock at the door, and Jaysen poked his head in before entering. “Pardon my interruption, but I didn’t want our ailing khesran to miss out on dessert.” His smile was bright and far too relaxed. The expression of a man who knew he held the winning hand.
“Isn’t that sweet?” Nerith said. “Let me finish up here, and I’ll leave you to enjoy that in peace.”
Jaysen set the covered plate on the table, his smile for Veyl less warm now that Nerith’s focus was on her wrist again. “I hope you feel up for joining us later this evening, Veyl. Your father offered to teach Ahnkreth Kyril Feral’s Folly after dessert. It should be quite entertaining.”
“Perhaps.” Veyl barely pushed the word out past the rage, sorrow, and frustration that squeezed her throat. She hissed as if Nerith’s ministrations hurt more than they did, giving herself an excuse to focus on that process and beg off an evening that she would have loved to be part of.
