Mortimer, page 11
part #6 of Everybody Loves Large Chests Series
“Waaah!”
Keira, on the other hand, nearly fell over every ten or so steps. She would’ve faceplanted on the ground a dozen times by now if she wasn’t linking arms with Rowana for support.
“Easy there, sweetie, I have you,” the elf reassured her.
“Phew… thanks again, Rowie. I honestly had no idea this sort of footwear even existed,” Keira grumbled. “I can’t believe I let you talk me into wearing these things.”
Her ensemble was almost identical to Rowana’s, aside from the color.
“But you look so good in yellow! You always wear those drab clothes that do you no justice. Even though I buy all those cute outfits,” the elf pouted slightly.
“I can’t wear that frilly stuff out in the field! It offers no protection and makes it difficult to move around! Can’t I at least go barefoot?!”
“Denied. You promised you’d adhere to proper etiquette when I officially introduced you to my parents, and I’m holding you to it.”
“But you never mentioned anything about formal wear! And why didn’t you tell me your parents were some fancy-shmancy big shots!?”
“Oh, I don’t know. I guess for the same reasons you didn’t tell me you were some weirdo deity’s Hero,” countered Rowana with a sharp glare.
Keira did not answer and merely stared guiltily at her feet. As expected, the news that the catgirl had been hiding something that huge from her lover did not go over smoothly with the elf. Once the military parade’s hustle and bustle settled down, the two of them had a very frank and lengthy discussion regarding trust. Rowana eventually forgave Keira for keeping such a colossal secret from her, but at the same time made it abundantly clear she would lord it over the catgirl until further notice.
“Are there any other complaints you may have about tonight’s dinner?” the elf asked demandingly.
“No, ma’am.”
“Good. Now, come on, let’s not keep them waiting any longer.”
The two of them resumed their walk up the stone path as they steadily approached the Slyth family’s home. Objectively speaking, ‘home’ was a bit disingenuous since the building in question was a grand three-story mansion that rivaled the Central Consortium’s offices in size. It was built at the base of one of the largest Hylt branches in the city, with the titanic tree trunk looming behind it. The surrounding estate enveloped the ancient limb’s entire forty-meter width and covered nearly two acres of ‘land.’ It was impossible to approach the place on foot from any direction other than the front, making it quite secure and rather isolated.
The massive front yard was basically a park in its own right. It had well-trimmed hedges, eye-catching sculptures, beautiful flowers, and happy little trees spread around to create a soothing and serene atmosphere. It was quite obvious the oversized garden took a lot of resources to maintain, especially considering the fact that all the vegetation had to be grown in planters. There wasn’t any fertile soil this far up a hylt tree after all, but that didn’t stop the Architects from building the place in a way that made visitors forget they were actually hundreds of meters up in the air. The area’s main drawback was that the distance from the main gate to the actual mansion was impractically long. Rowana didn’t seem to mind since the scenery was romantic and nostalgic, but Keira’s high-heeled struggles gave her a different opinion. Boxxy’s inner perspective wasn’t exactly positive, either. It mentally scoffed at this tremendous waste of resources. Paying people to maintain scenery that was neither functional, shiny, nor tasty? What sort of madness was this?
Though, if anyone could afford an extravagant environment like this, it was Samulus and Doris Slyth. Their family, as it turned out, was among the wealthiest in the Republic. They owned several mercantile and artisan guilds, the most profitable of which was the Pixie Powder Pavilion. The nation-spanning organization was the undisputed best when it came to the wholesale procurement, production, and transportation of alchemical ingredients and compounds. It had been the core of the Slyth family’s legacy for the past six generations and the main reason why Rowana became an Alchemist like her father. As for why her house was a one-room hovel in the Azurvale equivalent of bum-fuck nowhere, it was because she wanted to be independent and find her own way in life.
When the two lovebirds finally reached the front of the mansion, they were greeted by two rows of servants. Butlers in sharp-looking black tuxedos on the left, maids in modest, nun-like black dresses with white aprons on the right. There were twelve each, and they were lined up on either side of a luxurious red carpet leading up a marble staircase towards the mansion’s intimidatingly large front doors. They all bowed respectfully as Rowana and Keira walked between them. The catgirl felt overwhelmed and out of place, which was to be expected since she was a penniless vagrant until a few months ago. But why was the elf also growing nervous? Surely she should be used to this sort of stuff by now, right?
Before Keira could ask, the two of them arrived at the grand double doors. A butler much older than the others waited for them. He seemed to be the only human servant in the otherwise elven household. He had a full head of very short hair grayed by age, sky blue eyes, and a dignified, almost snobbish air about him.
“Mr. Ridgeworth?! Is that you?!”
“Indeed, Little Miss. It is good to see you are still in good health.”
The man gave Rowana a respectful bow of his own, although his wrinkled face’s stern expression did not match the gentle tone of his voice.
“That’s my line! I haven’t seen you in years! I was sure you would’ve retired by now!”
“Nonsense, my lady. Serving the Master and Mistress of the dignified house of Slyth has been this one’s duty and privilege for many years, and I do not plan on giving it up any time soon. The day I am relieved of my responsibilities will be the day I can no longer walk.”
“You’re still saying that, huh?”
Rowana gave a small, tired sigh, then formally introduced him to her girlfriend.
“Keira, this is Mr. Ridgeworth. He has been the head butler around here ever since I can remember. He’s something of a second father to me.”
“My lady’s words are most kind,” the old butler replied and turned towards the catgirl. “And this beautiful creature must be Madam Morgana. I have heard much about your exploits and have been looking forward to meeting you in person. I am reassured to know that our Little Miss’s future is in such capable hands.”
“I, uh, th-thank you, Mr. Ridgeworth. It’s a pleasure to meet you as well,” the redhead replied with an awkward curtsy.
“Indeed. Now, we shouldn’t be keeping Master and Mistress Slyth waiting any longer. Walk this way, if you please.”
The butler led them into the house proper, which was as posh and extravagant as one might expect. The corridors and rooms were decorated with soft, vibrant carpets, high ceilings with far too many chandeliers, maroon and white walls, and a collection of tasteful artwork and fine furniture. Calling the decor ‘extravagant’ would be perfectly fitting and somewhat of an understatement.
Interestingly enough, what Boxxy was most concerned with wasn’t the potential for larceny all around, but rather the butler leading it and Rowana deeper into the mansion. He was far too fit and healthy for his apparent age, even if it wasn’t clearly visible underneath his uniform. He had the type of physique common among adventurers or soldiers, not manservants. This wasn’t really cause for alarm in and of itself, however, as it made sense that the rich and powerful would have capable bodyguards close at hand.
What really caught the shapeshifter’s interest was the fact that this ‘human’ did not smell like one. Indeed, he didn’t have a scent at all. Combined with his out-of-place level of fitness, Boxxy took this to mean that he was a doppelganger in disguise, potentially one of Reggie’s agents. It hadn’t gotten a chance to visit the ‘ganger capo since it came back to Azurvale, so it could only guess at this individual’s purpose. Not that it mattered anyway. Should it come to that, Boxxy was confident it could handle Mr. Ridgeworth in a fight without deviating from Keira’s limits.
Of course, this was all one grand assumption. For all it knew, Reggie could have implanted agents into any number of wealthy households to keep tabs on them. Any socialite would eagerly hire a servant recommended by one of the country’s wealthiest and most respected bankers. Whether that was the case or not, Boxxy saw no reason to blow both their covers with a confrontation, so it decided to keep a close eye on the guy for the time being.
The servant led the two visitors through another set of grand double doors into a spacious well-lit dining room even more lavishly decorated than the rest of the house. The roaring fireplace on the left side and an array of tall, curtain-covered windows on the right really gave it that extra ‘oomph.’ A few sets of decorative weapons lined the walls, each of them far too shiny to be practical. A needlessly long table covered in a pure white embroidered tablecloth dominated the middle of the room. Rowana’s parents were seated next to each other at the far end of said table. They seemed to be in the middle of discussing something when the head butler arrived with their guests. Doris wore a beautiful bright red dress that was markedly more modest than her daughter’s, aside from the long vertical slit on her skirt’s right side. Samulus was undoubtedly the least colorful of the group with a black tailcoat and white undershirt.
“Announcing the arrival of lady Rowana Slyth and her partner, the esteemed Decanus Keira Morgana,” the butler declared in a loud, crisp voice.
Samulus’s eyebrow twitched a bit at the word ‘partner,’ suggesting this wouldn’t be a pleasant visit. Fortunately, his expression softened a bit when he turned to greet his daughter.
“Welcome back, dearest daughter,” he declared standing from his seat.
“Hi, dad! Hey, mom!” returned Rowana in a casual manner, which made his eyebrow twitch some more.
“Oh, relax yourself, Sam,” his wife lightly slapped him on the wrist. “No need for formality among family, right?”
“… Yes, dear.”
It was almost impressive how quickly the middle-aged elf’s tension disappeared as he said those words.
“Mr. Ridgeworth, please be a dear and grab us some refreshments before dinner, would you? I think a cup of Floodroot tea would do all of us some good.”
“Of course, Mistress Slyth. Would milady Slyth or madam Morgana prefer something else?”
“Some tea sounds lovely, actually,” answered Rowana with a smile.
“Lots of honey for mine, please!”
“Understood. I shall return shortly with your tea.”
The head butler excused himself from the room with yet another bow. Doris stood from her seat and briskly walked over to Rowana to give her a small hug.
“Oh, it is always nice to see you, little sunflower,” she said in a sweet tone. “I just wish you’d come visit more than once a decade.”
“Come on, mom. You know I can’t stand this house. Besides, you two have a habit of dropping in unannounced at my place every few months. Regardless of my consent.”
“Are we really that big of a bother?”
“Of course not. I just wish you’d work on the ‘unannounced’ bit.”
“Nonsense!” declared her father as he strode over behind his wife. “It’s a parent’s duty to meddle in their child’s life! And meddle is exactly what I plan to do!”
His gaze locked onto Keira and his mood rapidly deteriorated as he looked her up and down. While the catgirl’s normally unruly hair was fashioned into a formal bob and she wore the clothes and makeup of a high-class lady, she obviously didn’t belong in them. Frankly, she looked like a hobo in a suit. The catgirl, seemingly oblivious to her inadequacies, stepped forward and attempted the same polite curtsy she tried with Mr. Ridgeworth.
“It’s a pleasure to formally meet you, mister Slyth.”
“Yeeeees… Quite. Please, have a seat.”
The four of them took their seats at one end of the long table with Doris and Samulus sitting opposite Keira and Rowana. As if on cue, Mr. Ridgeworth entered the room with a small trolley and served everyone cups of tea with a rather strong aroma. All of them took a few long relaxing sips, after which Doris unhesitantly addressed the orc in the room.
“So. My daughter’s sweetheart is a Hero, hmm?” she raised an eyebrow.
Keira instantly tensed up at those words.
“Y-yes, madam!”
“Madam? Please, dearie, there’s no need for that.”
“Then, uh, should I call you Mrs. Slyth? Or is Doris okay?”
“Huhuhuhu, I’d much prefer if you called me ‘mum,’ actually!”
“… Huh?”
“That is the proper way to address one’s mother-in-law, isn’t it?”
“HUH?!”
“I mean, you are going to marry Rowana, aren’t you?”
*SLAM*
“Don’t be absurd!” exploded Samulus. “I will never allow that! My precious little girl is too young to marry!”
“You’re the one being absurd, dear. She’s already nineteen.”
“She’s still thirty- no, fifty years too young!”
“Hypocrisy is unbecoming of you, Samulus. We were already married at her age, weren’t we?”
“That’s completely different! We were- are members of respectable families, and this girl is just some gutter rat who’s only using Rowana to get her hands on our money!”
“Samulus, my dear husband.”
A sudden chill filled the room at Doris’s words. Her lips were smiling, but her glare was sharp enough to burrow a hole straight through the man’s forehead.
“Please keep those paranoid delusions to yourself. Not only do you insult our honored guest and your daughter’s judgement, but you’re severely underestimating me as well. Do you honestly think I would allow this relationship if I thought for a single moment my daughter was being deceived by some gold-digger?”
“… No, dear. Sorry, dear.”
“And?” she pressed.
“And I apologize to Miss Morgana for my harsh words.”
“Very good. Now then- Hmm? What’s wrong, you two?”
She hadn’t noticed it since she was busy disciplining her unruly husband, but both Rowana and Keira seemed too embarrassed to look at each other. Or anyone else, for that matter.
“We, uhm,” the redhead spoke first. “We aren’t… exactly… ready for ma-… ma-… marriage… yet.”
Matrimony was a huge commitment and not something to be taken lightly. No matter how lovey-dovey they were, it was an undeniable fact that they only met a few months ago.
“B-b-besides,” stammered Rowana, “two girls marrying is… illegal.”
“Maybe in the Republic. Plenty of other places will let you get married, though!”
*SLAM*
“No!”
This time it was Keira’s fists that banged on the table.
“It has to be here! It has to be where Rowie and all my friends live or else it doesn’t count!”
“Huhuhuhu, you say some nice things, don’t you?” replied Doris with a light chuckle.
“Indeed. It is good to see you’re taking this matter seriously,” Samulus nodded approvingly.
“Then does the victorious Hero of Chaos have any plans to change the law?”
“… Something like that. I figure if those bigwigs want to use me as their Hero, the least they can do is make an exception for us.”
“What about other same-sex couples, hmm?”
“Err, I don’t-”
“Surely if you get what you want and ignore their needs, they’ll turn on you, am I wrong?”
“Mom, please stop probing my girlfriend,” said Rowana with a sigh. “You know full well a single person can’t make generations of bigotry disappear overnight. Speaking of which, why are you so calm about this, dad? I always thought you were against same-sex couples like us.”
The fear of being disowned by her family was what made it impossible for the old Rowana to come out to her parents. Her father’s attitude was one of the main reasons she sought to live on her own in the first place, though that decision did not help her open up to others in the slightest. In fact, other than herself and a few old friends, no one knew of her sexual orientation until Keira gave her the courage and confidence to be herself. She was planning on having this sit-down with her parents eventually. It just happened sooner than expected since her mother found out about their relationship.
Rowana really should not have underestimated the housewives’ information network.
“I, uh… *Cough* Well, I admit I had a bit of a fit when your mother told me of your, uh, preferences,” the father admitted. “But I’ve had a lot of time to think since then and I’ve decided that if that’s how my precious daughter is, then it’s my responsibility to correct-”
*CRACK*
What sounded suspiciously like the cracking of knuckles emerged from somewhere under Doris’s side of the table.
“Accept her for who she is,” Samulus rapidly corrected his words.
Rowana didn’t know how to particularly feel about this and decided it was probably best to ignore her mother’s very obvious influence.
“Thanks, dad. That means a lot.”
“Also, Mr. Slyth?”
“Yes, Miss Morgana?”
“I have my own thanks to offer. Your Pixie Powder Pavilion’s potions and elixirs have saved a lot of lives out there in the field.”
“Oh! Well, I’m glad our contribution to the war effort was of assistance to our brave soldiers.”
“Is that so?” Rowana raised an eyebrow. “I’m sure your patriotism has nothing to do with the fat government supply contracts. Tell me, are you still making your people water down potentially life-saving healing potions?”
