Shadows and Light: The Complete Series, page 65
“Where are we going?”
“I haven’t figured that out yet.”
Calista glanced down at her hands, the cuts and scrapes beginning to burn. She picked out a tiny piece of asphalt from her palm. “Can we go back to the beach house?”
“No.”
“The plane?”
“Calista, we can’t go back, period. If they found us at the storage unit, Ludis knows my fucking life story.”
Calista cringed and struggled to draw in a breath of clean air. Her lungs were raw, her nostrils filled with the acid stench of soot. After letting out a racking cough, she whispered. “I don’t understand.”
“Someone is feeding Ludis information on me. We are on our own.”
“Not your brothers. They wouldn’t do that.”
Anger ripped through his muscles, the pulse in his neck looked as if it wanted to burst through the skin. “No, not my brothers, but Emil must have had someone very close to him who is now sucking up to Ludis.”
Adam’s words finally hit home. Gut-wrenching fear ripped through Calista. Everything in the storage unit was gone. There was no disk, the only thing Adam could use to fight this nightmare.
“Why don’t they just leave you alone? You don’t have the disk and nothing to hold over Ludis’s head.”
Adam went still. The silence between them only revved up the panic building in Calista.
He finally cleared his throat and said, “Ludis knows me. I will never let him go free. I couldn’t save Annija or Rina, but I will take care of Ludis.”
“Then why look for the disk if you are just going to … ”
“Calista, with the disk, there may have been a way to take him down without crossing that line.”
Her mind reeled, gasping for some kind of solution. This was so far out of her experience, she had no idea what to do next. Without the disk, Adam and Anna would never be safe. And where did that leave the McNeil family?
She circled her waist with her arm to worn off the chill that settled deep in her spine. A thick substance coated her arm right below the elbow. She raised it and swallowed hard as the pain from her side cursed through her.
“Adam,” she moaned.
He skirted around traffic then turned to her. Shock slowly seeped into his every feature. “Oh shit. Where are you hurt?”
“My right side.” She set her hand on the area as the pain began to burn through her. “It’s just a scratch.”
He lifted her hand. It was covered with blood. “Does this look like just a scratch?”
His foot hit the accelerator and he raced across four lanes of traffic, leaving behind honking horns and screeching brakes. He exited the freeway and drove down the access road, turning into the parking lot of a large shopping mall. Finding an isolated spot, he slammed the car in park and got out. He charged around the sedan, threw open the passenger side door, and knelt down.
“Calista, move your hand so I can see.” Adam’s voice was gentle, but his eyes had transformed to pools of black. He eased up her stained t-shirt and sucked in air. “Shit!” He shook his head. “It’s deep.”
He used the edge of her shirt and gently dug out something in the cut. It hurt like crazy, but Calista clenched her jaw tight to keep from moaning.
“There are pieces of the cement block still in the wound,” he said, fingering the blood-covered piece of mortar between his thumb and forefinger. Wiping it off on his jeans, he cupped his hand around her neck, and brought his lips down on the top of her head. “I’m sorry, Calista, so sorry.”
“Don’t, Adam,” she choked out. “This isn’t your fault.”
“Like hell it isn’t. I should have kicked you off the damn plane and cuffed you to the inside of Jared’s truck.” He swept a hand over his face and let out a noisy sigh. “I need to get you to a hospital.”
“No, you are not dumping me alone in some strange emergency room, damn it.”
A sob clogged Calista’s throat and she couldn’t keep the tears away. She was more frightened than she could ever remember in her life, but the thought of being without Adam left her empty. “Can’t you clean the wound, close it up?” She hitched in a painful breath and swallowed. “Like Jason Bourne. He patched up his wounds.”
“Who the hell is Jason Bourne?”
“Forget it. You can do something, right?”
“I need supplies, drugs … ”
“We can stop at the pharmacy. Maybe Mary McNeil can call in something.”
He didn’t answer right away. A mixture of longing, doubt, and fear settle deep within her. She didn’t want to add to Adam’s problems, but she couldn’t allow him out of her sight either. Anna’s words swam around her head.
If you don’t go with Daddy, I’ll never see him again.
What if there was some scheme in play where she played the leading role of keeping Adam alive? She couldn’t do that in a hospital bed.
“Adam?”
He let out a string of curse words then yanked out his cell, punching a number on speed dial. “I need a favor, a huge favor.”
Chapter Twenty
With a foot on the brake, Adam slowly eased into the rutted parking lot of a nameless hotel. The heat radiating off the asphalt began to seep through the cracks, turning the interior into an oven the moment he shut off the ignition. Rolling his shoulders, he eased his t-shirt off his clammy back, and scanned the rugged terrain. The small, dusty town off the main highway in Death Valley was the perfect place to lay low for the next twelve hours. After a much needed shower to wash off the grime and soot, he was going to shut it all off and give himself time to recharge.
How had Ludis discovered the storage unit? The place was rented under an alias and there was nothing in the paperwork that could be tied back to Adam. He had left anything that could be traced electronically in the hotel room with Calista’s belongings right after Ludis blew up Rina’s home. As for his vehicle, he removed the tracking device himself. Yet somehow, his uncle’s men not only found out about the storage unit, but came prepared to torch him into an early grave.
Adam glanced at Calista who laid prone in the passenger seat. The gash on her right side wasn’t as serious as he first thought. After a quick stop for supplies, he cleaned and dressed the wound. There were other scrapes and burns he would take care of when they stopped for the night. She dozed off into a restless sleep once they were back on the highway.
His brothers came through for him in a big way. Noah organized sleeping accommodations while Jared arranged for someone he trusted to charter a plane outside of Las Vegas for a flight back to Maryland. At this point, Calista’s safety was his highest priority.
In the last sixteen years, he learned how to take care of himself and those he cared about. He had been in some horrifying situations, but he somehow maintained the upper hand. Nothing in his past came close to the mess he was in now. If there was a way out, he couldn’t see it, and that scared the shit out of him.
The only way he could insure everyone’s safety was to force Ludis to confess his involvement. For that, he needed the disk, which if existed in the first place, was now a melted wad of crap on the floor of his storage unit.
Adam had only one option. He had to kill Ludis. Going against a man in Ludis’s position was a death sentence, but his family would be safe. Of course, Anna would grow up without him in her life, and Calista …
Hell, he couldn’t do that to either one of them or himself. He killed on the job. He wasn’t a murderer.
Adam opened the driver’s door and eased his sore, stiff body out of the car. After another quick scan of the area, he rolled the tension from his muscles and unlocked the trunk. The entrance to his motel room was only a few feet from the parking lot.
Using the room card, he unlocked the door, and a blast of cool, clean, fragrant air filled his nostrils. He dumped the contents of the bags onto the far side of the king bed. Returning to the car, he opened the passenger door, knelt, and lightly stroked Calista’s cheek with his thumb. Like him, soot covered her face, neck, and arms while angry scrapes covered her elbows and hands. Her bloodstained clothing was ripped to shreds and beyond repair.
Adam rubbed a rough hand over his face and silenced the string of curse words flooding through his head. He was better than this. What the hell happened to his training the last few hours?
“Stop it, Adam,” Calista said in a hoarse whisper. “You’re doing that blame thing again and it’s pissing me off.”
“Can’t,” he replied and tried to plant a smile on his face. “We have a place to stay for a few hours. Can you move?”
“Yes.” She tried to sit up, but her face distorted with pain.
“Stop. I’m going to carry you, Calista. It’s going to hurt the gash on your side like a motherfu…
“Just do it, I’ll be fine.”
Removing the seatbelt, he twisted to face her. He placed one hand behind her back and the other one under her knees. He lifted her against his chest, carefully clearing her feet from the door. Using his hip, he slammed it shut, locked it with the key fob, and hurried into the room.
“Not on the bed,” Calista forced out the minute he closed the motel door.
“Then where?”
“I need to clean off the soot first.”
Adam headed into the small restroom. He set Calista back onto her feet. Her hand never left her side as she took a moment to find her balance.
“Just lean against me, sweetheart, and let me help you,” he said as he turned the water on at the sink then grabbed the towels and washcloths off the rack.
She rested her head against his chest and met his gaze in the mirror. “I’m fine, Adam.” She raised her hands. “I’m a natural-born klutz. I do this much damage just riding my bike back and forth to school and the diner.”
She placed her hands under the warm water and began to wash the grime and blood from her palm. Closing her eyes, tears glistened on her eyelashes as she took in deep, cleansing breaths.
Adam wrapped his arm around her front and held her. “Shit,” he said under his breath. He moved her hands from the water and pressed the hand towel to her palms as gently as he could. “What else hurts?”
“My elbows,” she whispered.
She reached for the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head. Adam bit back a string of profanity when he saw the condition of her arms and elbows. The blast from the second explosion left third degree burns on her left shoulder. A long, angry scrape began at her elbows and extended down to her wrist.
“I have something that will help with the pain,” he said, and headed back into the room. He grabbed the open box of gauze, ointment, and tape. Calista stood completely still as he gently washed each abrasion, applying a healthy amount of ointment, and wrapped her arm from her elbow to the wrist with the gauze.
He turned her so she faced him. “Where else, Calista?”
“That’s it.” A small smile graced her lips, but the tears in her eyes tore him in two.
“I wish I had some pain meds.”
“I hate taking those things. They make me nauseous.”
“I hate you in pain,” Adam murmured, lightly brushing her hair off her face. A lone tear escaped down her cheek. Adam lowered his head and caught the tear with his lips. “I will make this up to you.”
Calista took his hand in hers and kissed his knuckles. “I don’t need that, Adam.”
He swallowed hard. “What do you need then?”
“You. I just need you.”
Her words pierced through his heart, shattering it into pieces. “Have you looked in the mirror? Why in the hell would you want to be with me?”
Calista studied him for a long time before she spoke. “You know damn well why. You feel it too.”
“I’m not good …”
Calista fisted her hands and slammed them into his chest. “Don’t you dare say it!” She let out a heavy sigh. “Sometimes, Adam, you are such a dumbshit. There isn’t enough love in the world as it is,” she said as she pinned him with a heated glare. “When someone is giving you their heart, you don’t stomp on it.” She swiped away the moisture on her cheeks. “You accept it, hold it close, cherish it, and never allow anyone to take it from you.”
Calista jerked out of his hold and stepped back. “I know what you are doing, Adam Blake, and I will not make this easy for you.” She shoved him to the side and stormed out of the restroom.
“And what the hell am I doing?”
“You are going to dump me somewhere and turn yourself over to your uncle.”
Adam took hold of her fists and brought them to his lips. It took a moment before he could speak. “I don’t think anyone has ever dared call me a dumbshit to my face.”
“Get used to it, big guy. It’s going to become one of my favorite nicknames for you.”
Calista’s words trailed off and her eyes closed. She pulled her hand free from his hold and dropped down on the bed.
Adam sat next to her and said in a low whisper, “I don’t want to hurt you, Calista.”
“Then don’t leave, don’t do this to your daughter … and to me. Anna was right all along. You had no intention of coming back to us.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
Calista lowered her head and tightened her arms around her waist.
“I’m waiting, Calista.”
She stretched her feet out in front. “Anna told me on the runway in West Virginia that if I didn’t come with you, she would never see you again.”
So that was why she got back on the damn plane. “There is no way in hell Anna could have known any of this would happen. She just didn’t want me alone. That’s it.”
“I get that she’s just a little girl trying to hold onto the only family she knows. But what if she knows something you couldn’t possibly know? You are being pigheaded not to consider the possibility.”
“Dumbshit and now pigheaded. You sure the hell found yourself a great guy, Calista.”
Calista ran a shaky hand through her curls and bit back a sob. “I see you for who you are and want you anyway.”
“You don’t know what―”
“Seriously, if you don’t shut up, I’m going to hurt you. I have something to say, and damn it, you are going to listen.”
“So talk.”
Calista wiped another tear off her face and stood. Adam let her go. With her back to him, she began to speak. Her voice was filled with so much pain, it cut deep.
“If you didn’t want something to develop between us, why didn’t you just stay away from me? You had to know how this was going to play out. Did you think you could just disappear out of my life and everything would return to normal as if you never existed?”
For an instant, their gazes held until Calista lowered her eyes, breaking their connection. “I knew you were dangerous from the very first. I moved back with my grandfather because I felt safe there, loved. I needed that to recover after my best friend was murdered.”
“Murdered? When the hell … ”
“Hanna Tu was my roommate, my best friend in the world. But you know all that, don’t you? That’s why you came into the diner that first day. It was to meet me and see if I was a continual threat to your sister-in-law, your family.”
Adam stormed back into the room. “No, damn it. That isn’t what happened.” He could feel the fear in her, how terrified she tried not to act around him. Now he knew why.
Calista glanced down at her feet. Clearing her throat, she faced Adam. “This is why I was so pissed at you at Jared’s. When he walked out of the house, and then I met Jennie, everything just clicked. I assumed you … hell, it doesn’t matter anymore. So much has happened since then. It all proves one thing. We are like ice and water. You break through your problems, risking everything for the people you love. I, on the other hand, sink back into the familiar, hiding behind my grandfather’s apron, my music, afraid to fight back.”
“Shit! Calista. God, I didn’t know.” He cupped her face in his hands. “I walked into Pete’s because I hadn’t eaten all day and was starving. I wasn’t investigating you.”
“I don’t believe in coincidences, Adam.”
A small smile appeared at the corner of his lips. “Neither do I, but there has been some strange shit going on. Annija talking to Anna, the whole telepathic thing between me and Anna …”
“You think Annija brought you to the diner?”
Adam shrugged. “Crazy stuff like this doesn’t happen in my world. Maybe I’ve taken a step into the rabbit hole. The idea doesn’t sound so crazy anymore.”
She took a step back and just stared at him. When she finally spoke, her voice was so faint, Adam almost missed what she said.
“I just wish I had been strong enough to fight this damn pull we have between us now.”
“I never meant to do that to you.”
The fierce look she fired at him slammed into him like a fist to the gut. “What happened last night meant everything to me. For me to allow someone to get that close, that intimate, there has to be … I have to be … damn it, I’m in love with you.” She raked a shaky hand through her hair then penned him with a glare. “I’m sure you never meant that to happen either.”
Adam dropped down on the edge of the bed. He didn’t know how to answer. No, he sure as hell didn’t want to hurt another woman like he hurt Rina. He would go to his grave with that on his soul. But he also didn’t want to be that man anymore either. Adam’s future passed before his eyes during Emil’s psychotic episode. Unless he stopped the pattern of malice in his life, he would destroy what Annija sacrificed everything for and become the one thing she feared: a carbon copy of Emil and Ludis.
Before he could come up with a reply, Calista pitched a pillow at his face. The second one hit him between his eyes while the third slammed into the side of his head. By the time she was done, all six pillows on the bed were either surrounding him or on the floor while tears streamed down her face.
“From the moment I stepped into the scene in Rina’s living room, there was part of you I knew I would never touch, but I allowed myself to fall hard anyway. And as much as I hate the violence in your life you wear like a damn coat, I would have found a way to deal with it because you are worth it.”
