The Devil Goes To Church Too, page 17
part #1 of Written Between the Pages Series
“Come live with me. You can drive to school,” I whispered.
“What about the address?” he asked.
“They won’t know unless you tell them. You only have a short time left,” David said.
Noah’s face brightened. David chuckled, then said, “I know your mom is in the hospital, but you will need transportation. Raquel, would it be okay if I bought Noah a car?”
I nodded yes and smiled. Noah was the most responsible kid I knew. I whispered to David, “Nothing flashy.”
“Not at all. You ready, Noah?” David asked as my phone rang.
Noah said, “Yes, but let me get Mama’s phone first. Hello?... She’s in a regular room now… How’d you get her number? …. Oh, that’s right… Okay, she’s in room 612… Okay.”
I watched him put the phone back on the little table. He looked at me and said, “That was Pastor Charles. Him and Sister Charles are coming to check on you.”
David gave me a knowing look, but I didn’t respond to it. “Okay,” I whispered to Noah.
He kissed my head and so did David, then they left. I turned on the TV until the nurse brought me something for pain. As she was leaving, Pastor Charles and his wife were walking through the door. I was surprised she came with him. She never spoke to me at church.
“Hello Raquel. How are you feeling?” he asked, then kissed my cheek.
“In a lot of pain,” I whispered as Sister Charles, Monique, looked on.
He grabbed my hand as his eyes softened. He rubbed it and said, “I’m so sorry you’re in so much pain. Let’s pray.” He paused while he waited on Monique to join him at my bedside. He continued, “Father, we thank you for sparing Raquel’s life. We thank you for using Noah to be her protector. God you are amazing. What the devil meant for evil, will be turned around for good. And in turn, we will glorify you for it. God, your daughter is in pain. Please be a healer throughout her suffering. Give her joy in the midst of this storm. Remind her that you are the Almighty and that she can lean on you. Thank you again, Lord for life, and life more abundantly. In Jesus’s name, Amen.”
Sister Charles walked out in tears. I didn’t know what had happened. Ryan leaned over and kissed me again on the cheek, and said, “I love you, Raquel. I always will. I have to go see what’s going on with Monique. Call me when you can.”
“Thank you for coming,” I said, then watched him walk out of the room.
Since David and I had gotten engaged again, I hadn’t been talking to Ryan unless I needed something for Noah. After about fifteen minutes, my cell phone rang. It was Ryan. I wondered what he wanted. He knew I could barely talk.
“Hello?” I whispered.
“She could see how much I still love you, Raquel. I’m not in love with Monique. I haven’t been for a long time, if ever. I really wish we could have been together, but I know that wasn’t possible.”
“I have to go, Ryan,” I whispered.
“Okay. I’ll try to come see you tomorrow.”
“Okay. Bye.”
I felt sorry for him. Although I was a grown woman and no longer a naïve little girl, I still had a soft spot in my heart for him. I still loved him. I silently prayed for him, until I fell back to sleep.
“Why does she do this to me?!” Noah said loudly.
My eyes widened as he paced back and forth in my room. He and David had just returned from getting him a brand-new Mustang. So much for not being flashy.
“Calm down Noah. I know you’re upset, but we’re in a hospital,” David said.
“What happened?” I asked.
“When we got to the house, Grandma wouldn’t let David in the house to help me. Then she told me that I couldn’t take anything she’d bought. Everything I touched, she claimed she bought it. Mama, I’m trying to be respectful, but I can’t take this anymore.”
“Don’t worry. I gotchu. As soon as I’m out of here, I will go get your things. Rather, call your Grandpa. He will let you get your things.”
“Okay.”
“She convinced you to stay there, didn’t she?”
“Yes ma’am. She told me I wouldn’t be happy living with you. I would have to switch schools, never see RJ, and that you wouldn’t have time for me. I know now that was a lie to control me and you. She let me grow the locs to persuade me to stay. How did you know?”
“They came to see me earlier. She was talking about me suffering because I was living in sin and that she couldn’t believe I’d gotten pregnant again out of wedlock. She’s so judgmental, like she’s perfect,” I said hoarsely.
My voice was coming back. The tube had been out for over four hours. I watched Noah call my dad. He asked, “Grandpa, are you at home?... Yes Sir… I’m going to stay with my mama until I go to DC, but Grandma won’t let me get my things… No Sir… Okay, I’ll come back at 8… I love you too.”
He smiled softly at me when he’d ended the call, then said, “Thanks Mama.”
“I love you, Noah. So, let me hear you spit a rhyme,” I said with a smile.
He smiled and said, “Ahhh, look at you. Okay.”
David and I sat there and listened to him freestyle about my hospital stay and how much I mean to him. That was my world, and nothing was ever going to change that.
Chapter 19
May 2006, Noah’s high school graduation…
“With God, all things are possible. My grandparents taught me that. Without hard work and dedication to go along with that, all your dreams will remain possibilities. My mama taught me that. I learned whenever and wherever I could, grasping lil nuggets here and there. The most valuable lesson I learned was that I had to live to make Noah happy. I can do what others want me to do, but will I truly be satisfied with my life? Probably not. I have the tools to become great at whatever I put my mind to. God has been a constant in my life, and he’s blessed me with many talents and gifts. My pastor, Rev. Ryan Charles, always told me to find what it is you’ve been blessed with and build on it.”
I sat there, crying like a baby while Noah gave his salutatorian speech. I was so proud of my son. He’d gotten a full academic scholarship to Howard University and would be in the “Showtime” marching band. He’d lived with me for the past two months, and it was the happiest time of my life. My mama refused to speak to either one of us, and it had been so peaceful. When Noah had returned to their house to get his things, she was still acting an ass about stuff she’d bought. When I became a pharmacist, I was giving my mama almost $1,000 a month to buy food and whatever Noah needed. Ryan was giving me $500 of it every month. So, everything in that house for him, I’d paid for. When I got out of the hospital, I went straight there. I didn’t stand up to her often, but when it concerned Noah, I’d walk through fire. I told her if she didn’t let him get his things, I’d call the police on her like she did me years ago. I had carbon copies of the checks I’d written her to take care of Noah. I rarely gave her cash, because I didn’t trust her to tell the truth about me taking care of my son. Noah had watched us go back and forth for a moment and had almost swallowed his tongue when I’d said I was going to call the police. She’d finally let him go upstairs and get the last of his things. She sat on the other side of my daddy for Noah’s graduation, like the proud grandmother. She didn’t like letting go, nor did she like it when she couldn’t have her way.
David and I had gone to the courthouse and got married. I didn’t have any friends, nor did I have much family, so we decided to do it that way. His family flew in from Houston that weekend, and we enjoyed their company. They were shocked at how much Noah had grown. My parents didn’t bother to show up, and I wasn’t surprised by their absence. The most important person in my world had given me away.
When Noah finished his speech, the entire auditorium gave him a standing ovation. He’d finished high school with a 4.0 GPA. The Valedictorian had a 4.05. They were neck and neck. Noah had worked extremely hard, and I was giving him a surprise pool party at the house. David’s family was at the house, preparing for the festivities. Noah didn’t even know they were here. So, he would be thoroughly surprised. I’d invited RJ, and he said he could round up some people. I told him not to round up too many. Noah was quite popular in school. Everyone loved him. After he won that first talent show, that was it. I watched my son sit in his seat and smile brightly. He had a gorgeous smile. I couldn’t stop the tears. David gently wiped my cheek with his thumb, and said, “The time flew by so quickly. Seems like yesterday, I was meeting him at your graduation, telling him what a genius was.”
I smiled at the recollection of those memories. I looked down at Pastor Charles and could see the emotion in his eyes. He’d been there for Noah quite often. I think Noah looked up to him like a father figure in his life as well as David. Unfortunately, he didn’t know that Ryan just wasn’t a father figure, he was his father. Ryan looked back at me and smiled.
“Noah Emmanuel Brooks, Salutatorian.”
We screamed and yelled at the top of our lungs for Noah. Of course, Hazel clapped lightly, like she was too good to scream. I was so glad I didn’t turn out like her. We went through the rest of the graduation, then hugged Noah tightly afterwards. He was begging to go to some party, but I told him he needed to come home first. I smiled inside, imagining how surprised he would be. We sped home, so we would get there before him. Cars were already lining up down the street. I got the DJ to play the instrumental I’d requested. The moment Noah walked in the backyard and everyone had yelled surprise, the music started. I began singing, “There’s a spark of magic in your eyes. Candyland appears each time you smile. Never thought that fairy tales come true, but they come true, when I’m near you.”
I continued singing as Noah let the tears fall from his eyes. I hadn’t sung to him in a while. He mostly sang to me these days. He came close to me and grabbed my hand. I had to close my eyes to finish the song, otherwise I would have broken down at the sight of him crying. When I finished, Noah hugged me tightly as everyone else clapped. “I love you, Mama. This is amazing. I wasn’t expecting all this.”
“You deserve all this and so much more, Baby. Congratulations, and I’m so proud of you.”
I kissed his cheek, then let him go change into his swim trunks. I walked around, greeting Noah’s guests. When I got to Ryan, I said, “Thanks for helping financially with the plans.”
He smiled at me and said, “Of course, Raquel. I would have been a fool to miss the opportunity.”
I smiled at him then continued greeting people. My yard was so full. My house had never seen so many people. Noah had made it back outside and was walking around greeting his guests while dancing to Jay-Z’s Excuse Me Miss. I’d told the DJ to make sure he played all the edited versions. I didn’t want to offend anyone. I really didn’t want to hear all the cursing, myself, but it wouldn’t have offended me. My daddy finally walked through the back gate and hugged Noah, then me. He was alone. Noah looked around him, then asked, “Where’s Grandma?”
“When she heard the music, she refused to get out.”
I rolled my eyes, then watched Noah’s eyes sadden. He went to the DJ booth and told him to play old school R&B and gospel music for the next hour. He walked out of the gate and came back with my mama. I was content with letting her keep her bougie, holier than thou ass in the car. She irritated me to no end. I watched him kiss her cheek and pull out her chair. She smiled at him, then kissed his cheek. Although she treated him badly at times, her presence meant the world to him. He was a bigger person than me. I was angry. Noah had gone on about his business, having a great time with his friends. Honestly, I was glad he didn’t live there anymore. That meant I didn’t have to go there as often. Daddy and I sometimes met for lunch, so I would see him often. I watched her sit there, like she was too good to be here. I couldn’t deal anymore. Just as I was making my way to her, David grabbed my arm, and said, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were about to do something that you would regret later.”
I smiled softly at him, then followed him back to my seat. He’d fixed me a plate of ribs, potato salad, rice dressing, and beans. David’s parents had done an excellent job on the food. It was seasoned to perfection, and it had that southern touch. When I finished eating, I went to his mom, and said, “Mom, this food was amazing.”
“Thank you, Baby,” she said, kissing my cheek.
I went stood by the pool and watched Noah and his friends play water-basketball. I was so glad that he was happy. He would be leaving in June for summer school. I guess I had zoned out, because Noah grabbed me and asked, “You okay?”
“Yeah, I’m just thinking about how much I’ll miss you.”
“Well, I will come home as often as possible. I love you, Mama. You really did your thing to provide for me, and I am so grateful to have a mother like you.”
“Don’t make me start crying again,” I said as my voice trembled.
“I won’t,” he said, then pulled me in the pool.
I literally could have cursed him out in front of everyone. My hair and my clothes were drenched, not to mention the damage it did to my makeup. Everyone had a good laugh on my account. I looked at him and rolled my eyes. Noah laughed and said, “Remember, I’m your world.”
“You better be glad, too,” I said, slapping his arm.
He picked me up and hugged me tightly. I watched my mom get up from her seat and leave, then Daddy followed suit.
It had been a great but long day. It took us at least four hours to clean up. My body was so sore afterwards, I laid in the bathtub for thirty minutes, before washing up. When I got out, David rubbed my shoulders and said, “You did good. Noah was so surprised.”
“He was, huh?”
“Yeah. When does he go to school?”
“In another three weeks,” I said sadly.
“At least he’ll only be an hour away. You can go see him whenever you want.”
“I know, but I’ve gotten so spoiled these last couple of months. I want to see him every day.”
“I know, Baby, but you have to let him go. The bird has to fly out of the nest at some point.”
“Ugh, don’t remind me. We talked about him pursuing music. He’s still going to enroll as a pre-law major, but if the music thing pops off, that’s the route he’s going to take.”
“Well, whatever he wants to do, we’ll be behind him 100%.”
“The problem for me is, he won’t be just an hour away all the time. Most of the time, he’ll be gone,” I said, poking my lip out.
“You can always quit working and follow him around,” David said sarcastically.
I slapped his arm, then put lotion on my legs. After putting on my gown, there was a knock at the door. I grabbed my robe, then said, “Come in.”
Noah walked through the door with a huge smile on his face. He looked at us and said, “I just wanted to say thanks again. I was so surprised. I love y’all.”
“We love you too, Baby. Thank you for being such a great kid,” I said, then held my arms out for a hug.
I could see David shaking his head side to side in my peripheral. When Noah walked out, he said, “You are going to go crazy when he leaves.”
“Shut up David,” I said as he pulled me to him.
“You’re a great mother, Quels. I love you.”
“I love you too,” I said as we both laid in the bed.
Within a short matter of time, we were both asleep.
I felt pretty good when I woke up, considering. I cooked breakfast for everyone, and after we ate, David took his family to the airport. Noah had barely said a word, he was so tired. After cleaning the kitchen, I sat on the sofa and put my feet up. As soon as I turned the TV on, I could hear my cell phone ringing in the bedroom. Noah’s phone was ringing as well. Hmph. I went to the room to see I’d missed a call from my dad. Before I could call back, Noah walked in my room and said in his phone, “She’s right here, hold on.”
His eyes looked sad. He gave me a soft smile, then said, “It’s Pastor Charles. Your line was busy when he called.”
I frowned, then asked, mouthing the words, “What does he want?”
“Sister Charles died this morning.”
My eyes widened. I slowly grabbed the phone from him, and said, “Hello?”
I could hear him crying on the other end of the phone, and it pulled at my heart strings. I put my hand to my chest and swallowed the huge lump in my throat as Noah watched me.
“Raquel, I lost Monique today. Her appendix ruptured.”
“I’m so sorry. Noah and I will come over to be there for you and RJ in a little bit.”
“Thank you, Raquel. RJ could really use Noah’s strong, comforting spirit right now.”
I could hear what he was saying between the lines. He needed me, and I couldn’t say no, not at a time like this. Although he’d said he wasn’t IN love with her anymore, I knew that he still loved her. She was his wife of almost twenty years and the mother of his eighteen-year-old son. I said, “Okay. We’ll be on our way as soon as I get dressed.”
I gave Noah the phone, and he smiled, then said, “Let me know when you’re ready.”
“Okay Baby.”
I went to the closet and grabbed some jeans and a nice shirt. It was kind of muggy out, so I wasn’t trying to be cute. I pulled my hair back in a bun, applied facial moisturizer and lipstick, then asked, “Noah, are you ready?”
I walked out of the room and bumped right into David. He grabbed me to steady my balance, then asked, “Where are y’all going? I thought we were all going to hang out today, since I leave in a couple of days.”
I pulled him back inside the room, and said, “Sister Charles died this morning. Pastor Charles called, wanting Noah to come and support RJ.”
“So why are you going?”
“David, I’m just going offer my condolences.”
He gave me a harsh look, then said, “You’re going to console him, to be there for him. When are you going to realize that you are the only one suffering from keeping this secret. He’s going on with his life, and the decisions you make to protect him is going to ruin yours.”
