Where Love Lies, page 18
“Mom, I’m ready.” I look to Paige, black slides now on her feet.
“Great. Let’s go.” I force a smile—something I’ve been doing a lot lately.
I’ve been trying to act like I have the perfect life, keeping secrets and telling everyone I’m okay when I’m really not. I’ve been trying to cover the cracks in my life rather than stop and face them head on because I was afraid of not having the perfect family. But it just got worse, the breaks got deeper, and it began to get harder to cover up. If I faced my problems head on, I bet I wouldn’t be so broken.
30
On our way to Olive’s Flower Shop, I text a locksmith to change the locks while I’m out. Heston is not coming back into my house. He and I burned from both ends of a candle stick, fast and hot, until our wick went cold. Jesus, he’s starting to sound like a rebound but from who? Cam? My mother’s death?
I pull onto the small gravel driveway in front of the shop. It looks the same as last time. A cute little brick shop with flowers of every kind.
“This is where you got the flowers?” Paige asks, skeptically. She’s used to shopping in the city.
“Yeah. It’s cute, isn’t it?”
She gives me a forlorn look before opening her door and getting out. Meeting her around the side, we walk down a narrow path, rows of pots held up by railroad ties and cylinder bricks greeting us.
“Hey, you’re back!” Olive says with a smile, a bottle of pink solution in her hand. Her hair is wispy and sweaty from working outside and she’s wearing a garden apron with dirt rubbed all over the front, but what really stands out are those damn yellow boots.
“How are the Bougainvilleas doing?”
“Um,” I hesitate, not wanting to tell her I ripped them out of the ground.
“She tore them up,” Paige tattles. My head snaps in her direction, my eyes glaring at her. Her lips roll onto one another, as if she didn’t mean to say what she did, but it’s too late to take it back.
“Yeah, I can’t say I’m surprised, dear.”
My brows furrow, uncertain what she means.
“You don’t seem like a pink flowers’ kind of girl. I saw you eyeing the Queen of the Night tulip last time you were here. That’s your flower.” She points then walks past us. Paige and I give each other a look and follow her.
She stops in front of the deep purple flowers and leans in, inhaling their smell, a smile on her face.
“A flower can only bloom as much as its owner. You gave me the impression you’re more complicated than a pink shrub. She glances at me from the corner of her eye, and I swallow, not sure what to say.
“Wow, those are really pretty. I want these. Can we get these?” Paige pushes past me and cups the blossom in her hand, staring at it longingly.
Olive steps back and looks at me.
“Um…yes. Let’s get several.”
Paige grabs a few pots, and I help her by grabbing two of them. Checking out, I set my hand on the counter and ask, “Is it a bad thing to be complicated? To not be a pink flower kind of girl?” I feel like most women want to be the bright, feminine color, capturing everyone’s eye.
She looks closely at the tags as she jabs the register, putting in the price.
“Well, you aren’t easy, but I don’t think it’s a bad thing. You’re strong. It takes more to get your attention and thrive is all.”
I think about what she says and look at the building behind her, wondering if she does psychic readings or something in there.
“I’m just an old lady who has seen many people come and go. What I say doesn’t mean much, honey. It was just an observation,” she says, handing me my receipt. I want to agree with her, tell her she has no idea what she’s talking about, but…it does sound like me.
Back home, I follow the directions through a series of text messages the locksmith gave me to get inside the house, then Paige and I work on planting our new flowers. Without a shovel, I watch her scratch and dig at the rich soil. This feels right, but I can’t help but think back to the day Heston and me planted our flowers. It was sexy, getting caught in the downpour, the sex on the stairs, but looking back, I felt more like a teenager climbing into someone’s back seat, trying not to get caught, than finding the one to settle down with.
I clean my hands in the kitchen sink, dry them off, and open my phone to check notifications. Nothing. Sighing, I place it on the counter.
“Still nothing?” Paige asks, sitting at the kitchen table.
“No,” I mutter, worry starting to turn into nausea. “Let’s order pizza and watch trash TV, babe.” Paige doesn’t say anything, looking at her phone with a blank stare. I’m starting to feel defeated. I’ve done everything I can as a parent to lessen Paige’s worry, but every hour that passes and nobody has called about her dad, I feel like we’re going to have to accept something bad did happen.
My phone dings, and I snatch it up.
Tenly: Don’t forget the Block party is this weekend!
I cuss under my breath, rubbing my forehead. I need to make a damn pie. Should we even attend with everything going on? My eyes sweep to Paige. She looks so lost…I wonder if going would help her get her mind off things. We can’t just wait around. We have to keep living.
Me: We’ll be there.
I just hope Heston isn’t.
31
Lying in bed with the side-table lamp brushing a soft glow across the room, the bed feels larger than a king, lying in it by myself. Heston’s texted twice asking to come home to talk about it, but I said no once and didn’t say anything the second time. I don’t want to be a bitch, but I’m just over him and over us.
Rolling onto my side, my tank riding up my stomach and my silk shorts giving me a wedgie, I wish my mother was here. She would help me through this. Losing her has been the biggest hurt of my whole life. She was my best-friend.
A loud knock causes me to startle and pull the blankets closer to my chest. I stay completely still, trying to figure out exactly what it was.
BANG! BANG!
“Rain, open up.” Heston’s voice carries down the hall. Holy shit, he’s here. Sliding off the bed, I grab my robe from the back of the door and put it on. Walking out of my room, I stop at the end of the stairs, where Paige is standing and looking at the door with worried eyes.
“Are you letting him in?” she whispers.
Opening my mouth, I hesitate, unsure what to say and do. If I let him in, he’ll think we’re okay, and I won’t be able to get him back out.
“Come on, Rain. I know you can hear me.” The edge to his tone has me crossing my arms in front of my chest. He definitely doesn’t sound like the Heston I thought I knew. Paige and I stand there, staring at the door, unsure how to proceed.
“OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!” he shouts, kicking it and making me yelp. He steps away, the moonlight highlighting his shadow as he paces back and forth.
“Should we call the cops?” Paige asks, her face pale with worry. This is such a disaster.
“I’m sorry for whatever I did. I just really want to see you.” His now soft voice is a complete switch from moments ago, his changing mood a complete mystery. But what does become clear is the fact that I don’t have the slightest idea who Heston is.
“Just go away, Heston, we’re done. I’ll have a sheriff bring you your things,” I finally answer back. He chuckles and goosebumps rise on my skin.
“YOU FUCKING BITCH!” he gnashes, jerking the door handle back and forth. He’s not going to leave; I’m going to have to call the cops.
“Hey, I think it’s a little late, don’t you?” Rhodes’ voice causes me to snap straight as a board. He’s out there with Heston! Rushing to the living room window, I peek through the blinds and see Rhodes standing at the end of the porch with a gun in his hand. Holy shit.
My heartbeat quickens, and panic sets in. This is too much, someone is going to get hurt.
“You going to shoot me?” Heston asks, his arms stretched wide.
“Just doing a neighborhood watch tonight, Heston, and I think Rain is asleep, in fact, the whole block is asleep.”
“You fucking her? Is that little slut coming over to your place at night? Is that what this is about? Because she’s engaged, you know.”
“Last I heard, you weren’t engaged, so if you can kindly leave the property.” Rhodes’ arms suddenly look bigger than before, a black gun in his hand as he holds it in front of himself, so Heston can clearly see it.
“This is wrong. This is my house.” Heston rubs the bottom of his chin, and Rhodes nods but doesn’t say anything.
Stepping off the stoop, Heston turns around to face the house, his arms stretched out wide.
“I’ll be back, Rain. I’m not giving up on us!” Letting the blinds fall closed, I take a step back, tears filling my eyes. He’s so angry, hostile even. I don’t want to know what would have happened if I let him in here when he asked me to open the door.
The sound of his truck roars like a lion in the night, and recklessly pulls out of the driveway, his headlights bouncing all over the walls of our house, before screeching off. With my hand on my forehead, I try and pull myself together.
“Rain, you okay?” Rhodes asks from the other side of the door. Hurrying over, I unlock it then open it. Standing taller than me, he looks down at me with a concerned look, placing his gun in the waistband of his jeans.
“Oh my God. I’m so sorry.” Anxiety fills my voice, embarrassment flushing my cheeks. He pulls me in and wraps his arms around me. With my face against his hard chest, I can’t help but feel safe for the first time in weeks, so much so that I close my eyes and bunch my hands in his shirt, pulling him closer.
“Shh, it’s okay,” he mutters into the top of my head. Blowing out a shaky breath, I wipe my tears and take a step back, noticing Paige on the bottom step staring, cheeks wet from crying.
“Thank you, I don’t know what he was thinking—”
“You want me to stay over, in case he comes back?” He gestures toward the couch, and my mouth parts.
“Yes, stay!” Paige answers, stepping up beside me. Wrapping my arm around her, I look up at Rhodes.
“No, you don’t have to do that.”
“I know I don’t have to, but I think I need to, in case he comes back.”
“Mom, what are you going to do if he comes back and breaks in?” Paige asks, and the thought alone scares me. I don’t know what Heston is capable of.
“Yeah, okay.” I give in, the idea of Rhodes being here with a gun in his hand making me feel safer. His shoulders lift, his eyes meeting mine one more time before he turns to his house.
“Mom, what was wrong with Heston? He reminded me of when Dad used to drink.”
Shaking my head I say, “I don’t know, but he wasn’t drunk. That was the real him, one hundred percent.” His behavior like a Leopard. Gorgeous to look at, loveable and kind, but if he’s not king of his territory, he’ll kill and destroy whatever is in his path until he is. It scares me to think about what would have happened if I married him.
32
The sound of rain pelting the window wakes me from a light sleep; frustrated, I pull the blankets up under my chin and roll onto my side. I was too nervous to allow myself to fall into a deep slumber last night, the idea that Heston might come back and somehow sneak in haunting me, with every creak heard and shadow seen in the house. Thunder booms, making me startle, my heart beating so fast, you’d think I just got back from running. Slipping onto my back, my hands sliding down my face, I replay last night in my mind for the fiftieth time. I keep thinking I could have handled the situation better, or maybe I should have just called the cops. Sitting up, yawning, I grasp my phone from the nightstand. Owen messaged me.
Favorite Gay best friend, Owen: One, you’ll have to give me the details on Heston becoming Ted Fucking Bundy on your doorstep, but first things first. I saw a brooding, handsome Rhodes enter your house and not come out!!!!!!! Spill the tea woman!
Pursing my lips, I back out of his message and look through my other texts and emails, finding nothing on Cam. Blowing out a deep breath, I toss the phone on my bed and change into some clothes. Normally, I’d grab my robe, but I know Rhodes is here. Keeping it comfortable, I put on some sweats and a camo t-shirt. Leaving my room in search of some food, I hear light laughter and deep guffaws. Stopping in the entryway to the living and kitchen area, I watch Rhodes and Paige sitting at the dinner table. Paige on her knees in her chair as she leans over half of it.
Unsure of what is happening here, I say, “What’s going on?”
Paige’s head snaps in my direction.
“Rhodes is teaching me how to play chess.”
With my hand on the fridge door, I freeze and notice the gameboard between them.
“You can play chess?” My right brow lifts as I ask him.
“Yeah, I mean, somewhat. I know the basics.” Leaning back in his chair, he places a hand on his thigh and shrugs. His dark hair is up in a hair tie, his deep nude colored lips pulled into a slight smirk as he watches Paige move a piece. He’s really good looking, which makes me question why he’s helping me out so much. Surely, he has a girlfriend to attend to. Maybe he’s just a nice guy… but then I remember how we met and the asshole tendencies he possesses. Why are men so damn complicated to figure out. Seriously, they say we are complex creatures, but, I’ve come to realize, they’re not any better.
Not seeing anything I want in the fridge, I shut it. Crossing my arms, I lean against it. “Thank you for staying over last night, it was…”
“Not a problem,” he interrupts, his green eyes now on me, making me antsy. “What are you up to today?”
“Um, I have to make that pie for the block party thing.” My brows instinctively furrow. The fact that I’m going through a bad break-up, have no idea where my ex-husband is, and now have this damn baking project to complete is just too much.
“You know how to bake?” he asks, moving his piece that looks like a horse on the boardgame .
Sighing, I reply, “No, but I’m sure I can figure it out with YouTube or something.”
He chuckles, knocks the last white piece of their game off the board and stands. Paige’s mouth drops open as she stares at the bored like he just completed some magic trick.
“Grr, I didn’t even see that coming!” she shouts, causing Rhodes to smile bigger.
“My mom used to bake pies all the time for church. I learned a few tricks, if you want some help.”
That antsy, I don’t know what to say, but I’m thinking I know what I want to say, happens again, rendering me a mouth-gaping idiot.
“I don’t know, I’m sure you have things you need to do today; I don’t want to impose.”
His shoulders rise, just as he slips his hands into his back pockets.
“I need to work on my bike and call my daughter, but after, I can come back over. Besides, I need to prepare some meat for the party, so we can just do it together.”
His persistence makes me silently laugh. “What are you making?”
“Hell, probably just burgers and hot dogs.” His ‘I don’t give a fuck’ attitude is admirable. Taking his lead, I think about how I could use the company during this hell of a times, especially if Heston shows up again today.
“Yeah sure, let’s meet up later then,” I finally answer. His hand slaps the counter as he sucks a breath in through his teeth.
“Nice.” The electric tension between us is definitely there and I can’t help but wonder if he feels it. It’s horrible to think he’s sexy and strong, and that I feel safe around him when I am going through this break-up with Heston.
“I’ma run to the store and get what I need, do you want me to get anything for you?” I ask.
“Nah, I already have what I need,” he replies, his hand rubbing his beard.
Getting dressed in a brown tank and black shorts, I slip into my brown slides. Grabbing my purse, I find Paige sitting on the last step of the stairs, waiting for me.
“Hey, I’m heading out. Want to come?”
She shakes her head, looking down at her hands that rest between her knees. I wasn’t expecting her to say no. I can’t leave her behind when Heston is out acting like a mad man.
“No, I’ll stay back. Have you heard any news on Dad?”
Inhaling a deep breath, I reply on an exhale. “No baby, I haven’t.”
Without another word, she stands and stomps up the stairs. I should call the sheriff on my way into town.
Outside, the too hot sun smothers me with its intense heat, sweat instantly beading on my forehead.
Instinctively, I look over at Rhodes’ house, but I don’t see him. Inhaling, I think about the pros and cons of us spending time together weighs heavy on my mind.
One hand on the wheel, the other holding my phone, I dial Sheriff Reese to see where we’re at with Cam’s missing-person case.
“Hello, you’ve reached Sheriff Reese, I am currently unavailable, but if you leave a brief message, I’ll try and return you call by tomorrow.”
“By tomorrow?” I repeat angrily, just before the answering machine makes a loud beep.
“Uh,” it takes me a second to get my head straight from her message, “yeah, this is Rain Adler. I’m calling to see if you have any leads or anything news about my ex-husband, Cam? Please call me back as soon as you can.”
Hanging up, I slip my phone into the cup holder.
Finally reaching the market, its parking lot is full of cars, so I park in the shade, near the back, making sure to keep my windows an inch down to let it breathe. I hate getting into a car and feeling like you just slide into an airlocked crockpot.
Head down, purse hanging from my shoulder, I go inside. Cool air blows aggressively as if it’s going to blast my body back to its normal temperature, and it feels good.
“Hey Rain!” Turning my head toward the friendly voice, I find Blair working register three. I’ve been in here a few times, and the fact she remembers my name like were friends feels great. It makes living here more personal and comfortable.
