The Dirt Road Home, page 1
The Dirt Road Home
The Dirt Road Home
LM Terry
The Dirt Road Home
2nd Edition ~ previously published as Death and Daffodils
Copyright © 2021 LM Terry
Published by LM Terry
All rights Reserved
ISBN-13: 9798750046638
No part of this publication can be reproduced or transmitted in any form, either electronically or by mechanical means without prior written consent from the author. Brief quotes are permitted in the instance of reviews or critical articles. This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only.
This book is intended for readers 18 and older, due to adult content and language. This is a work of fiction. Any names, places, characters, events or incidents come from the author’s imagination and are used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Cover Design by Amanda Walker
Dedication
To my gentle giant. You carried me high for the first years of my life, so it’s no surprise I’ve had my head in the clouds ever since. You never gave up on me, even when you should have. Thank you for that. I wish I had an ounce of the strength you had. I’m trying… and right now that’s all I can promise.
Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Six
Epilogue
About the Author
Native American Prayer
I give you this, one thought to keep.
I am with you still, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sunlight on the ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush…
of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not think of me as gone ~
I am with you still, in each new dawn.
Prologue
Death is knocking at my door. Not figuratively. Death is literally standing on my porch, patiently waiting for me to open the door for him. I peek out the curtains, shivering at the site of the man who is here to end my miserable existence.
My story is about to end. So, I guess I should go back to the beginning. Back to a time when my life was seemingly perfect. Now it’s nothing.
Two Years Earlier
Mia
◆◆◆
“Hey, Mia, do you work Thursday?” my colleague, Chelsea, yells out to me as I head to my car.
“Yep, see you then.” I pick my way through the parking lot, trying to remember where I parked. These twelve-hour shifts are killing me.
“Make sure to soak your feet when you get home and make that hubby of yours rub your back.” She waves one last time before ducking into her car.
I roll my eyes. Yeah, Darrin rub my back? Fat chance. I’m sure his nose is buried in a case. Not that I’m complaining. This is what we came to the big city to do. We came here to make all our dreams come true and part of that is excelling in our chosen professions. He as a big city lawyer and me as a nurse. Everything is going according to plan. So, while he may not give me the attention I’m currently craving, he is doing exactly what we came here for.
I squeeze into my car, pulling the seatbelt over my swollen belly. The tiny baby growing inside kicks. “I know, I know, we need to eat don’t we, baby?” I whisper, giving my tummy a quick rub. As I’m backing out, I notice a man slumped over his steering wheel, near the back of the lot. “Hold on, sweet baby, we better make sure everything is okay. Then it’s cheeseburger time, I promise.”
I drive over to park in the empty spot near the man’s car. As I’m dragging myself out, he notices me. When I approach his window, I see blood. A lot of blood. “Shit!” I rip open the door. “Sir, it’s okay. Everything is going to be okay.” As my phone rings 911, I grab my first aid kit and wrap a tourniquet around each arm, to help stop the bleeding.
“Stop, what are you doing?” the man moans, doing his best to prevent me from applying pressure to his wounds. “Don’t you get it? I want to die.”
“Today you want to die, tomorrow might be a different story. Please let me help you. I’m a nurse. Help is on the way,” I say in my calm, soothing professional voice. The man has lost a lot of blood and is no match for me at this point, so I continue my ministrations to save his life.
His head lolls to the side. “Let me go. I want to go.”
“I’m sorry I can’t do that. Everything will be okay, sir. Nothing is bad enough to take your own life,” I tell him as I keep pressure on his wounds. The emergency staff is headed out now. Hopefully he makes it. Thank God I noticed him.
He leans forward in his seat so that his face is inches from mine. “If I live because of you, I will hunt you down and rest assured my next attempt at this will be successful and you will be coming along with me.”
I back away as the staff loads him on a stretcher, hauling him inside. I follow them, but turn once inside, heading to my locker for a change of clothes. I don’t have one ounce of energy left. I haven’t eaten since eleven this morning and now it’s well past eight in the evening. I should call Darrin to come get me. As I shed my bloody scrubs, I think about what that man said to me. Most of the time people want to be saved. This was my first encounter where someone begged me to let them die.
After dressing, I call Darrin. When he picks up it’s all I can do to speak, I’m so tired. “Hey, can you please come get me. It’s been a rough day and I’m beat.”
“Really, Mia? I’m in the middle of putting my closing argument together. It’s only a thirty-minute drive, babe.”
I sigh. “Okay, I guess I can make it. See you soon.”
“Hey, can you pick up some milk on your way home? Oh, and coffee. Got to go, this is some of my best work yet!” he says excitedly and then click…dead air.
Great.
I love his enthusiasm over cases. Really, I do. But I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed. I’m dog tired. Oh well, just a little longer. Soon my head will hit the pillow and I can sleep all the way till Thursday. I make a quick stop by the ER to check on the man who attempted suicide in the parking lot. Looks like he’s going to be okay. If I hadn’t gotten to him when I did he would have been a goner.
I get back to my car as it starts to downpour. I look up and yell at the sky, “Really? You’ve got to be kidding me!” Darrin will have to go without milk and coffee. I’m pooped. I just need to get my butt home.
The rain continues to come down hard, making it hard to see the lines on the road.
I’m so tired.
My eyes blink closed, and I smack myself a few times to stay awake.
Two more miles, just two….
more….
miles….
Chapter One
Mia
◆◆◆
“You ready?” the guard asks, holding the door to my cell open.
“Yeah, I guess.” After folding my orange jumpsuit, I set it on the cot that has been my bed for the past year. I take one last look at the tiny space. I can’t help but be disappointed. This was supposed to have been a punishment. It didn’t feel like one.
“We’re going to miss you around here,” the guard says. “You’re the only one who doesn’t give us any gruff.”
My only reply is a shrug my shoulders.
“Seriously, Mia, I hope you find yourself again. Life does exist after this you know?”
“Sure.” I follow him through the building until he we reach the officer who will give me my papers and belongings. The outside world lying just beyond the door.
He pats me on the back without another word as I sign my release papers and then the lady officer hands me a bag. “You’re free to go. Good luck, Mia.”
“Thanks,” I mumble and then stumble out into the bright sunlight. As soon as I’m outside, I slide down the brick wall. I don’t want to be out here. In a world where everyone I care about no longer resides.
I look in the bag and just like Darrin promised, I find a plane ticket, a change of clothes, and an envelope with enough money to get home. Nothing else. I guess I don’t know what I was expecting. This was our arrangement. Exactly what I asked for in the divorce. It’s all I need.
A
On the flight home, I allow my mind to wander through the events of the past two years. The wreck, the trial, the divorce, the deaths. My hand involuntarily roams over my empty womb. No tears come anymore. I’m bone dry. I’m nothing. A walking zombie. There’s nothing left. Only my beating heart, scattered thoughts, and nothing else.
It’s almost over I remind myself. In the beginning I’d hoped that the punishment I received, my sentence, would somehow reset me. It didn’t. A year in a cell was nothing. I suffered more in my head than in reality. Everyone was nice to me, including the other inmates. They all felt sorry for me.
Even the judge who sentenced me had called me into his chambers and all but begged me to take the deal the prosecution was offering. Plead to lesser charges and get six months on probation. I told him I wanted the maximum punishment. “Mia, you were pregnant and overworked. You’re not a bad person. Please take the deal,” he had said to me. In the end I was charged with misdemeanor vehicular homicide and only given one year in county. Not enough. Nothing would have been enough.
I’m sure you have guessed what happened the night I drove home from the hospital. I fell asleep and woke up in a nightmare. One that hasn’t ended. I was placed in an induced coma for many weeks to let my body heal from the trauma. The physical trauma would be nothing compared to the mental anguish I would suffer. I woke up to death, death, and more death.
Only one person came to visit me, my dad’s best friend, Thomas. He came once. He told me about my parent’s accident. Told me he would look after things and that he had hired an attorney to represent me. It was the only time I saw him. He wrote to me many times over the past year, but I never opened any of the letters. I refused to even touch the envelopes and had them all returned to sender. Why? Because nothing matters.
My attorney set Thomas up as my power of attorney, which officially ends today. My attorney visited me once a month after Thomas realized I wasn’t going to read any of his correspondence. He rattled on about leasing out my parent’s land, fixing a well, replacing the roof due to a bad hailstorm. Things that really didn’t matter to me. And I guess the land isn’t my parent’s anymore… it’s mine… for now. I should have asked the attorney to write out my will. Shit, why didn’t I think of that? Will a handwritten one be enough? It doesn’t matter. It’s what I’ll do. I’m leaving everything to Thomas.
I wait until everyone exits the plane before I leave my seat. A young couple struggles with their carry-on luggage and a crying toddler. I wonder what the family I killed would be doing right now if I hadn’t fallen asleep behind the wheel. Would they be taking their little girl on vacation? Would they be home snuggled up watching Disney movies? If I hadn’t fallen asleep, would I be doing the same with my own little girl? My angel baby, Erelah. Would Darrin and I be watching her toddle around our townhome?
“Miss? Is everything okay?” a stewardess asks, ripping me from my fantasy.
“Yeah, sorry,” I answer, grabbing my plastic bag from the compartment above me.
I’m headed to get a rental car when I spot my dad’s old blue Chevy pickup in the pickup lane.
“You didn’t think I’d come to welcome you home?” a gruff voice rumbles behind me. I slowly turn to see Thomas, hands in his pockets and trademark smirk on his face.
“Hey,” I whisper.
“Come here, darlin,” he says.
Reluctantly I take a few steps towards him. He reaches out, pulling me into his arms. This is awkward. It’s been a long time since someone’s hugged me. He doesn’t seem to care that I’m uncomfortable. “Welcome home.” He kisses the top of my head and then leans back, trying to get me to make eye contact with him.
I avoid his gaze, dropping my eyes to the ground. “You didn’t have to come. I was going to rent a car,” I tell him sullenly.
He chuckles and steers me out the door, pointing us in the direction of my dad’s truck. “I thought you might like to take a ride in ole’ blue. I’ll give you the scenic tour. I warn you though, not much has changed.”
What’s he talking about? Everything has changed. He opens the passenger side door for me. As I climb in, I notice my dad’s work gloves, still on the dashboard where he used to toss them after a long day working on the farm. I swallow the lump slowly forming in my throat.
We drive in silence, well except for the old-time country music playing on the radio. My eyes are glued to the window. It’s early spring and everything is just starting to turn green. Spring, a time for new beginnings. Not for me though, this is the season for my end. Evidently I sigh out loud, because Thomas reaches over and takes my hand in his.
“I know this isn’t easy, darlin, but you’ll get through it.” He shakes my hand, trying to get a response out of me.
“Sure,” I say, focusing my attention back to the window.
After several hours on the road, I notice we missed our turn to the farm. “Where are we going?” I ask.
“There’s no food at the house. You need to eat, and I need to check on things at the bar. Two birds, one stone.”
“I’m not hungry. Can’t you drop me off before you head to town?”
“No,” he says.
“No?”
“No,” he answers adamantly.
“I’m not hungry and I want to go home.”
“Eat and then I’ll take you.”
I thump my head back against the seat. Great, just what I wanted to do. I want to go home. I don’t want to eat and I sure as hell don’t want to see anyone. It’s a Monday evening, so I’m praying for the bar to be empty. The town has exactly four businesses. The bar, store, gas station and post office. That’s it. There aren’t even any traffic lights here.
When we get to the Tipsy Cow…yes, that’s the name of his bar. Anyhow, when we get inside he points to a stool at the far end of the bar. Hesitantly I glance around. All eyes are on me. I’m sure I’ve been the talk of the town. Homecoming queen turned murderer. All in the blink of an eye. I take the seat and let my hair fall over the side of my face, shielding me from the stares.
“Want a beer?” Thomas asks, taking the seat beside me.
“No, thank you.”
“Dina, two beers, burgers and fries,” he yells down to the lady tending the bar.
“Sure, thing boss,” she replies, winking at him.
He chuckles and leans over to tuck my hair behind my ear, not letting me hide from him. “We’ve got a lot to talk about, seeing as you haven’t been accepting any of my letters.”
“What’s there to talk about. Mom and Dad are dead. My baby is dead. I killed a family of three and Darrin divorced me. End of story.”
“That’s the past. Let’s talk about the future.”
I grimace. The future? There is no future, but he can’t know that. “Do we have to talk about it right now?”
“No, but I want you to be thinking about where you go from here,” he says as Dina shoves two bottles in front of us.
“Sure,” I whisper, taking a sip of the beer I didn’t want.
“You could continue to lease out the land, or you could think about hiring a few hands and farming it yourself. But maybe you don’t have any intentions of sticking around here. I’ll help in any way I can, darlin. I just need to know what you’re thinkin.” He tosses back half his beer in one swallow.
The answer to that question is easy, it’s the latter. I have no plans on sticking around. “I don’t know,” I simply answer.
“No hurry, hon. The leases don’t expire for a few months. I’m just going to need you to start talking to me.”
“Thomas, I appreciate all your help. Really, I do. But I’m not your problem. You have your own life. You shouldn’t waste it, worrying about me.”
“Waste it?” He laughs and continues, “Haven’t I always been there for you? Why would I stop now?”
“Because dad is gone and I’m not worth it.”
He looks up at the ceiling for a minute like he’s asking the heavens for an answer on what to do with me. When his gaze returns to me, he just shakes his head. He turns as Dina brings out the burgers. “Change of plans, sweetheart. We’re going to need those to go. I need to get this girl home.”
