Imperative: Volume 1, A Tale of Pride and Prejudice, page 67
Richard glanced at him while picking up his sister’s cards. “Did you know that a portrait of Wickham once hung in this home?” Samuel stared. “Did you know that our cousin visited it to cry? I will wager you a pound that she wishes she was there this moment seeking comfort in his limpid gaze.” Sorting through his cards he threw them down in disgust. “Darcy, understandably I suppose, wanted to give her absolution, blaming himself, her youth, that bastard …” He spoke in a low tone. “But he is also taking on the result of her behaviour for a lifetime and will have to look at it every day. I demand that she be aware of the hurt she has caused.”
“I am sure that she is! She lives with it every second of every day. And Mother told me that Darcy let his disappointment be known.” Samuel said heatedly, “You caused her to cry!”
“In her condition, she will cry if she sees a portrait out of kilter. You heard Cathy, she blames her age.” He waved his hand dismissively. “Tell me, young Darcy. You have promised your father you would look at her again. Now that you have seen the rather nicely matured form of your very young cousin, has your opinion changed?” Samuel stared away to a window and his jaw set. “Her looks are quite improved, are they not?”
“You disgust me. You are her guardian.”
“And my father demanded that I marry her just as strongly as yours. His suggestions of what our life would be were truly disgusting. Would you care to hear his description of our marriage?” Richard’s brows rose when Samuel looked to the earl and back at him. “And yes, I looked. I can appreciate a woman, a girl, as much as you. But I am not at all interested in my cousin, and never was, and my father will have to live with that. You … what are you thinking? Have you spent enough time with her to decide?”
He looked at his folded hands. “She stares at Wickham’s portrait, you say?”
“She did until we took it down.” Richard smiled. “I am curious what she is thinking now.”
“Do you take delight in seeing her hurt? She is not …”
“Innocent.” Their eyes met.
“What of forgiveness?” Samuel said in a low tone. “Do you not believe in forgiving the truly repentant?”
“I do, when it is proven. Darcy is even more liberal. He claims to never forget an offense done to him, but how many times did he clear up Wickham’s messes and hope that he would reform?” He nodded when Samuel sighed. “Although perhaps that was done more to protect his family than out of loyalty to that fool.” Richard rubbed his chin and saw Samuel’s impatience. “When I am convinced that she is sincere, I will gladly forgive my sadder but wiser cousin. She is fortunate that she does not have to depend on the forgiveness of society. The sins of the mother will never be forgotten, even if the child is saved.”
“Unless she marries.”
“hmm.” Richard nodded and picked up the cards to reshuffle the deck. “Tell me, what are you willing to forgive? Do you forgive your father?”
“Father?” He started.
“For disappointing your mother?”
“Oh.” He looked over to where Susan sat with Elizabeth. “It is difficult to see her hurt. I worry for them both. He is ill, I think.” Samuel looked up to see Richard’s brow crease with concern. “You have seen him in the grips of it. Terrible headaches he has. I have found him in a dark room, nearly sobbing with the pain, and so sick. He resists taking anything for it, as it leaves him further incapacitated.”
“When do they come on?”
“When he is angry, when he is in any great state of agitation or emotion. You can imagine how he has felt these last months.” He saw Richard’s understanding. “I brought the subject up to Mother yesterday. She said nothing then but later on she told me that he began having the headaches after my brothers and sisters died. The devastation he felt from that horrible week of losing his family was debilitating to him. She said that sleep became rare and anger became common. Gradually things improved as life settled into the new normalcy, but then the headaches suddenly grew much worse about the time that Uncle George died. And then this summer they began again. I remember that I was just starting my position with Mr. Easterly and he was visiting the office when he was struck down. We were to go to Darcy’s that evening to say farewell to Georgiana as she left for Ramsgate. Before everything happened.” He sighed.
“I wonder.” Richard sat back and played with his cards. “Of course no soldier ever admits to pain or suffering from what he experiences on the battlefield,” he nodded at Samuel significantly, “however, I know of men returning home, and the sheer magnitude of the trauma they witnessed affects the mind, the body, in different ways. Headaches, depression, even mania … I wonder if the loss of his children had the same effect on your father.”
“Making him fine most of the time but at times of stress, it would be triggered again?” Shaking his head, Samuel sat back. “If that is the case, then Father would be so much better suited to giving up the bench and coming to live quietly here at Pemberley. That courtroom is no pleasant atmosphere to sit in day after day. Hearing the cases would make any man angry.”
“That is true.” Richard rubbed his chin and saw that Gladney had disappeared from the room. “Hmm. Well, we should bring this up to Darcy. Perhaps he could convince his uncle to come home for a visit, and then suggest that he remain.”
“Mother would be thrilled.” Samuel smiled over at her. “I would love to see that.”
“I will not be a moment.” Darcy spoke softly and leaning down, held Elizabeth’s face adoringly in his hands, then crooking his finger at Georgiana, brother and sister left the room. She followed his broad back as he left and sighed.
“I am envious, Elizabeth.” Susan smiled, bringing her back from her thoughts, “But I appreciate seeing my nephew so much in love.”
Elizabeth blushed. “Thank you. I am so sorry for your disappointment.”
“Oh, well, I had hoped.” Susan shrugged and blinked away the blur in her eyes. “He needs to come home. I know why he stays away; this time of year is always hard for him. You see, our children died near Christmastime. Pemberley in winter just seems to sap away all of his strength, but if he would just come once, especially to see you with Fitzwilliam, it would surely bring him joy.”
“And you as well.” Elizabeth held her hand. “You love him so much, how can you bear to be parted from him so long?”
“I had Georgiana this time.” Their gazes went to the door. “And now my dear Samuel is home. Mr. Easterly has given him the entire month of January to visit.” She found her handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes. “It is so very kind of him. Harding spoke to him about granting the favour, and I know it was to make up for his absence.” Elizabeth squeezed her arm and she smiled. “Someday.”
Elizabeth looked up when Darcy and Georgiana returned to the room. “Now then, is everyone here? Where is … what am I to call him?”
“Bertie.” Richard called out. His parents and sister laughed. “He hates it with passion.”
“Then I would rather not fuel his passions. Albert?”
“He will hate it as well, but he will not remember, carry on.” Lord Matlock fell into a chair. “You seem to have a bee in your bonnet, Mrs. Darcy.”
“I only wish to celebrate this day as it should be. We attended church, we consumed an outstanding meal, and now …” A maid came in bearing a wide silver bowl filled with currents, raisins, almonds and figs. Another came in with a punch bowl and yet another had a tray loaded with cakes.
“What is this?” Darcy stood behind her chair and placed his hands on her shoulders. He watched as a footman opened a bottle and poured it over the fruit. “Is that brandy?”
Richard took a sniff and stood from the card table. “It certainly looks like it. What are you up to, Elizabeth?”
She laughed and moved to sit on the floor by the table. “Come on, gather around, surely you have played snapdragon?”
“No.” Chorused the room and she sighed. Darcy knelt beside her. “What do we do?”
“Samuel, you are closest, could you light a match, please? Now everyone sit back unless you want your eyebrows singed!” Samuel touched the flame to the tray and with a whoosh there was a fire burning with a bluish glow. “Quickly everyone, snatch a fruit!” Elizabeth cried and boldly reached into the flames and popped the soaked raisin into her mouth. “Come on!”
Darcy stared at her with his mouth open, and following her lead grabbed a current. “It is hot!” He laughed when he dropped it in his mouth.
“What do you expect?” Richard chuckled and gave it a try, opening his mouth to expose the flame on his tongue.”
“You look like a demon, Richard!” Cathy gasped
“This is easy! Will you try, Mother?” Samuel smiled.
“I have not done this for years …” Her hand reached forward and back a few times, then shutting her eyes she quickly moved in for her prize. “Oh, I did it!” She said with more relief than delight.
“I shall be burned!” Lady Matlock cringed.
“Oh go on, Grace.” Lord Matlock reached in. “I rather like that sensation.”
Cathy sniffed and reached in, lingering a little too long. “Oh!”
“Twit, you are not quick enough, go on try again!” Richard pushed her.
“What is this?” Gladney reentered the room and stood by the doorway in disbelief.
“Bertie, come on, this should be right up your alley.” Richard moved over a little.
“Why?” He looked at the scene suspiciously.
“You are always snatching a reward from a flaming pile. You are full of false courage, get to it.”
“What is the prize?” Gladney demanded.
Richard groaned. “Your pomade will not catch fire.” Grabbing his hand, he stuck it into the flames. Gladney yelped and stumbled back. “Fine, do it yourself!”
“There is a prize! Find the lucky raisin and you may have a wish of your choice for the reward. Just take care not to swallow the button!” Elizabeth laughed as instantly the men responded and grabbed for raisins. “I do not even care to know what you all are hoping for.” Elizabeth smiled at her staring sister and popped another current in her mouth. “Come on, Georgiana, they are lovely.”
Darcy nodded and she cautiously reached in. “Ow!” She withdrew her hand.
“With confidence, Georgiana, we would not let anything hurt you.” Darcy urged. “Try.”
“Very well.” Biting her lip she plunged her hand into the flaming mass and squealed when she snatched a handful of fruit.
“Excellent!” Darcy laughed and looked to Elizabeth who was sitting back, watching the family taking turns stealing into the flames. The conversation had changed. It was the familiar rhythm of insults and boasting, challenges and tale telling that naturally come about when a family gathers and is willing to let down its guard. Darcy moved away from the table and she leaned into his arms, and looked up to him. “I know it will probably not last beyond the next sunrise, but I thank you for this one night, dear Elizabeth.”
“Maybe a little of it will last.” She closed her eyes as he pressed his lips to her forehead. They smiled when Georgiana reached in again and Samuel threw a current at Richard who immediately retaliated with several of his own, and then they both went after Cathy and Gladney. “Charades next?” She giggled when Darcy groaned softly. “A word game?”
“Dancing.” He whispered in her ear.
“And then what would you like?”
Darcy nodded to the table. “What is in that punch?”
“I am certain it is more wine than juice.” Elizabeth laughed. “Why?”
“Because I think that you and I need to become silly drunk and then go upstairs,” his eyes twinkled, “and I shall present you with your gift.” Then pressing a tiny gold button into her hand, his teeth gently nipped her ear. “And you can present me with mine.”
Chapter 27
“You have made a great many families happy today. It was so nice to see them anticipating the arrival of the master.” Elizabeth hugged Darcy’s arm as their sleigh glided away from the tenant’s home on Boxing Day.
“None of them knew that I would appear, love. I never have before. I am rarely at Pemberley for Christmas.” He smiled to see her surprise. “You have turned my life upside down.”
“No dear, that is what you have done to mine; at least you are familiar with the places you sleep at night! I am just barely finding my way around another vast home. Blame your family for your feelings of discombobulation.” She lifted her chin and stared determinedly forward. “I am righting the ship.”
“Is that so? Well then, Captain, are we finished?” Darcy glanced to the back of the sleigh.
“One more.” Elizabeth laughed when he sighed and laughed harder when he looked at her with one raised brow. “Oh very well, yes, we are finished.” She saw his eyes twinkling as he watched the horse’s direction. “Do not try to fool me, Fitzwilliam Darcy. You are enjoying yourself immensely, and I am glad to see it. We needed this time alone.”
“We did, but most of all, I am enjoying watching you.”
“That is silly, you may watch me anytime.” She kissed his cheek, and he smiled at her. “What do you find so fascinating?”
“I am acutely aware of how you carried the entirety of the conversations. I thought that I was fairly relaxed around my people, but seeing how easily you meet them, complete strangers, I …” He ducked his head to kiss her. “I am ashamed. I am as aloof as you have accused.”
“I thought that you did very well.” He snorted. “I know how uncomfortable you are with fawning, but it was my impression that they truly hold you in high regard. Not one of the smiles and bows were offered as people attempting to appease the master, but because they genuinely respect you.” He looked down at the reins and back out to the snowy pathway. Elizabeth smiled as his embarrassment grew. “It is I who have been failing so terribly today.”
“You?” His head whipped around. “Whatever do you mean? I just said that you do so well with them!”
Elizabeth gently tapped his hands and pointed forward. He continued staring for a moment then looked ahead. “I know, but … I am completely unsure if I am behaving properly. I mean, well, just how should the Mistress of Pemberley behave to her tenants?”
A slow smile appeared and he chuckled. “Elizabeth Darcy, are you actually asking me how to be aloof?”
“No!” She gasped.
“It certainly sounds that way.” His lips twitched and he shot her a look before returning his attention to the path. “My aunt’s unending criticisms have hit home and you are feeling self-conscious.” When she looked down, he nudged her, “How did your mother greet Longbourn’s tenants?”
“Ohh,” Elizabeth groaned. “She put on airs.”
“Superiority?”
“Perhaps that is the wrong way to put it, but she does enjoy being mistress of the largest estate in the area.”
“What of Netherfield?”
“Oh no, that does not count, it is let out.” Darcy’s eyes looked heavenwards. “She is a resident of longstanding in an estate with a longer history.” Elizabeth fluttered an imaginary handkerchief and smiled to hear the rumble of his laughter. “I pleased you.”
“You know that you do. Nobody in my life has ever approached the happiness you bring me simply by sitting by my side. And when you grace me with your smile and your voice …” Elizabeth’s pink face grew pinker with a blush. Holding the reins in one hand he wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her warm cheek. “I think that you are setting the precedent for the mistresses of this estate to follow for generations ahead. Mother has been gone for too long for anyone to clearly remember her, even I barely remember her. You do whatever you think is best. I trust you.”
She stared at him with unhidden awe. “Sometimes I am overwhelmed with how very much you trust me.”
He smiled and looked back over the horse’s head. “You would prefer suspicion on my part?”
“No!” She snuggled against him. “Ignore my babbling, I am cold. It is clearly freezing my mind.”
“I will have you home and warm very soon, my love. Look, there is the Bensons’ home. Our last stop.”
“It looks like a snug cottage.” She smiled and sat up, fixing her coat while observing the small house. “All of your tenants’ homes seem to be well-maintained.”
“I would hope so; my steward would get an earful if they were not.” Darcy pulled on the reins and the horse slowed to a stop. “Here we are.”
Jumping down from the sleigh, he held out his hand and helped her down, then reached into the back for the last of the boxes. The door of the cottage burst open and two boys rushed out. “Mr. Darcy!” The eldest cried and then stopped dead to bow.
Darcy heard a giggle from Elizabeth and shaking his head, turned to them and nodded. “Boys. Will you please help to carry these in?”
“Yes, sir.” They ran up and Darcy gave them each a box, and reserving the heaviest for himself; offered Elizabeth his hand. “Right this way, sir! Mother is so excited!”
“Oh no.” He whispered.
“You will be fine.” Elizabeth squeezed his hand.
“Mr. Darcy, please, come in.” Mr. Benson met them at the door, taking the box and bowing all at once. “This is such a surprise, sir! If anything we thought your steward might come, but yourself, sir! And Mrs. Darcy! It is a great honour!”
“Mr. Darcy, welcome, sir. Mrs. Darcy, I saw you at church, madam but never expected to see you here. Welcome, madam.” Mrs. Benson was still hurriedly folding her apron and smoothing her dress nervously, while darting her eyes around the room.
“Thank you.” Darcy paused as the family looked at him expectantly and drew confidence from Elizabeth’s warm eyes. “Mrs. Darcy, this is Mr. and Mrs. Benson and their children.”
“I am very pleased to meet you.” Elizabeth smiled kindly at the bewildered family. “Your home is lovely.” They heard a baby coo and all eyes turned to a cradle near the fire. “And what a plump little cherub you have!” She bent to tickle the bright-eyed baby’s chin.
