Traitor, page 18
“This guard. He is new, eh?” Dionne narrowed her eyes as I entered the parlor where we conducted our language lessons.
I dismissed Victoria’s pleading expression from my mind. Tertius had acted quickly and without question when I’d asked him to give Egan an assignment elsewhere in the palace.
“Yes, he is. Petri.”
Petri was rotund, with a large nose and beady eyes. The kind of man who was in no danger of catching my lady’s maid’s eye.
“He is none so nice to view as last guard.”
Nor did he speak any Sandrinian. But Victoria’s long-term peace of mind was worth the sacrifice. “True. But in this case, that’s probably just as well.”
“You do not like to see handsome man? You Trellans, you have the odd ways.” Dionne splayed a hand on the square table of painted wood we usually used for games. “But perhaps this change pleases my brother.”
I gritted my teeth. These days I could be trusted around any man, handsome or otherwise. “I don’t believe Vander had any objection to him, but I was concerned my lady’s maid was developing an attachment.”
She tipped her head. “Your maid, she is allowed no attachment? Much like one of your Sandrinian nuns, eh?”
My laugh came out as an unladylike snort. Victoria and Sister Rochelle were about as opposite as two women could be. “No, she certainly doesn’t need to live like a nun. But I would’ve hated to see her heart get broken.”
“You fear the heartbreak, so she must fear it too?” She drummed her fingers. “This is why you treat Vander as foreign diplomat rather than fiancé?”
Heat surged into my face. “This has nothing to do with Vander. I was merely trying to protect my lady’s maid, as she has no one else here to look out for her.”
“Hmm. But to protect from love is a little sad, eh?” She shook her head. “Perhaps you spend too much of the time with Mother.”
My breath fled my lungs in a huff. The comparison stung more than I allowed myself to acknowledge.
“As we speak of Mother, I must give my thanks. Savan, he has been extended invitation to the birthday celebration.”
“Truly?” Perhaps I hadn’t made things worse after all. “I’m glad to hear that.”
“Ah, but will you make allowance for us to dance, or must I too be protected from this fearsome love?” Her smirk was playful, but a challenge glinted in her eyes.
I swallowed before I could say something I’d regret. “I’d hate to see you get your heart broken, but I certainly wouldn’t interfere if you were merely dancing with Savan.”
“Hmm.” She wrinkled her nose. “Today, I think we learn how to say, ‘Please direct me to nearest chamber pot.’”
My choking cough left me spluttering. “Excuse me?”
“Is most helpful phrase, eh? Especially for visiting the new places.”
The fire reddening my face increased threefold. “But I . . . it’s—”
Her smile was that of a predator toying with its prey. “Unless you prefer to return to the counting? We have not yet reached one hundred . . .”
I shook my head. Chamber pots it was.
My slippers slapped against the corridor’s marble floor. I relished each hard thwack reverberating along the walls. Hopefully, Victoria could hear them from my chambers.
The nerve of that ungrateful little . . .
For the third day in a row, she hadn’t spoken a word to me aside from “Yes, m’lady,” or “This etana, m’lady?”
My agitated steps faltered. I missed her company, her easy laugh. And I supposed I could hardly call her ungrateful when she’d been the one—
No. I’d only been trying to help her. To protect her. She had no right to turn on me so completely.
Footsteps echoed from an adjoining hall. I pushed my legs faster. I was in no mood for company. Not that whomever it was could likely speak my language anyway.
“Penelope!” Vander’s voice chased me from behind.
My stomach clenched. Not now. Fisting my hands in my skirt, I forced myself to slow down.
He caught up, venturing a timid smile. “Allow me to escort you to dinner.”
“Certainly.” I pushed the word through my clamped jaw.
“And after, I hope you will join me for a walk in the gardens.” He kept his head down, wringing his hands.
I took a deep breath before responding. “I appreciate the invitation, but I’m really too tired for an excursion tonight.”
“I have something I should like to show you.”
“Vander, I—”
“Please, Penelope?” In several long strides he was before me, blocking my path. “I know you have little wish to spend the time with me, but I cannot ignore your recent sorrow. I think this might be cheering for you.”
My mouth opened, then closed again. He’d noticed I was upset? And wanted to cheer me? A hint of warmth wound through my chest, melting anger in its wake.
“I suppose I could, if it won’t take too long. Thank you.”
He nodded and stepped aside, gesturing for me to continue down the hall. I gratefully accepted his arm, weariness flooding my limbs as my fury subsided.
Tertius and Nadia beamed at us as we entered the dining hall. Tertius leaned forward as we neared the head of the table, his voice a conspiratorial whisper. “You treat your betrothed well, son. It does us good to see it.”
I avoided Vander’s gaze as I released his arm and took my seat. Visitors from some northern province filed in, providing a fortunate distraction.
I’d agreed to marry their son—couldn’t Vander’s parents be content to leave it at that?
The meal passed in a slow drone of what I assumed to be pleasantries exchanged around me in Delunian. On occasion, a familiar word or phrase caught my attention, but listening closely enough to follow the conversation would’ve required energy I couldn’t muster.
Dionne sat across from me, her head lowered, her hands dainty and precise as she sampled her food. I caught her darting glances at the visiting nobleman’s handsome son and suppressed a smirk.
No interest in suitors, my slipper.
The servants cleared the last of the dishes, and we rose from the table. I curtsied to the visitors, then turned toward the door. Maybe if Vander wasn’t ready to depart yet, I could sneak back up . . .
“Are you prepared for our walk, Penelope?” Vander stepped to my side, extending his arm.
So much for sneaking away. “Yes, thank you.”
I touched my fingers to his arm as lightly as I could, conscious of his parents’ watchful gazes. Dionne, at least, was distracted studying the movements of her attractive guest.
We exited to the gardens, and my chest heaved an involuntary deep breath. Perhaps this would be good for me.
Soft moonlight bathed the surrounding plants in an ethereal glow, and freed from the sun’s heat, the moisture in the air felt more like a soothing dew.
“Have you been to the gardens of late?” Vander paused to regard me in the dim light.
“No.” I found the gardens stifling during the day, and most of my excursions were into town. “Not since the last lunar cycle, I believe.”
“Good.” He patted my arm and sped up our pace.
Among the disorderly clusters of bushes and blossoms in the Delunian gardens, without the palace in view, I could almost imagine we weren’t in a royal enclosure at all. That we’d wandered to some distant, remote field of wildflowers, free from the inquiring or disdainful stares of strangers. Free from the expectancy surrounding my every interaction with Vander. Free from a past that would never break its hold . . .
“Do you think you might now tell me?” Vander’s soft question startled me from my reverie.
“Tell you what?”
“What it is that bothers you.”
Ah, that. “I, well . . . it’s silly, I suppose. A simple disagreement with my maid.”
“I see.” He lowered his brows. “Shall we find new maiden to serve you? Not many of our young ladies speak Sandrinian, but if we make the adequate inquiries, I am certain—”
“No, thank you.” My chest constricted painfully at the thought of being separated from Victoria, my last piece of home. “I’m sure we’ll sort it out.” If only that could be true.
A question lingered in his expression.
“It’s just . . .” How could I explain without raising the touchy subject of romance? “Victoria is my friend as much as she is my maid, so it pains me to be at odds with her.”
He nodded. “My great apologies we do not provide more of the friends for you. Hopefully, in time . . .”
We reached a small clearing, the wider path beyond leading to a different section of the garden.
“But here we are. I cannot fix the troubles with your maid, but I do hope this shall bring some good cheer.”
Vander’s face hadn’t lit with such hopeful excitement since I’d first arrived in Delunia. He stood before me and grasped both my hands, drawing me forward.
In spite of myself, my pulse jumped in rhythm with our hasty steps. What could be in these gardens to produce such anticipation?
“Would you please oblige me and close your eyes?”
My feet faltered. Close my eyes? Calm down, Penelope.
I willed my heart to settle back into my chest. Vander had yet to show any signs of an interest in sorcery, and he was unlikely to perform a spell in the middle of the gardens with no provocation.
“All right.”
I winced at the non-regal tremor in my voice. I closed my eyes, allowing Vander’s hands to lead me.
“Just a little farther.”
I couldn’t help smiling at Vander’s excitement, like Dominick when he wanted to show me a leaf or rock he’d found on one of his walks with his nurse.
Vander came to a halt. “There.”
I slowed my steps until I’d stopped what I hoped was a respectable distance away. The vulnerability of being alone with him, unable to see where I was going, left me breathless.
His feet shifted on the dirt. “Your eyes can now open.”
I blinked, trying to establish our new location among the gardens’ many winding paths.
“Do you see anything familiar?” He watched me, expectation lighting his eyes.
“Umm . . .” My eyes roved my surroundings. What was I supposed to recognize? “These flowers are all lovely, but I don’t—”
My words disappeared in a gasp. Lilies of the sunrise bloomed on a square patch of dirt that looked recently cleared. Their stems were feeble compared with the ones at home, their purples and pinks less vibrant, but the shape was unmistakable.
I approached them cautiously, extending my fingers to brush a soft petal. “They’re beautiful. I didn’t realize you had such flowers here.”
Vander stopped trying to contain his grin. “We did not, until just lately. I discussed with our gardener which of your Trellan flowers had the most likeliness to thrive in such a climate.”
“You planted these for me?” Thank heavens the dim light wouldn’t reveal the tears pooling in my eyes. “Not that you’d be the one to plant them, of course, but—”
“Not in the entire, no. But I did help.” I’d never seen his chest puffed out so far.
Vander had worked here in the garden, likely digging in the dirt on his hands and knees, for me.
“You—you did a wonderful job. I would’ve never guessed how much it’d mean to see . . . thank you. This will be my favorite part of the gardens from now on.”
I tore my gaze from the captivating familiarity of the flowers to look at him. His eyes radiated something new, something perilous and invigorating, as they held mine.
Sudden awareness washed over me of our close proximity, my hands still encased in his.
Before I could step back, he brought my fingers to his lips. “I am glad to have done well.”
With one longing glance at the lilies, I straightened and took a step back. “It must be getting late. We should return.”
He released my hands, and I almost wished he hadn’t. “Yes. But you are cheered?”
I smiled, taking his arm before he had a chance to offer it. No one was around to scrutinize my every move, and I was too tired to do it to myself.
“Rei. I am very much cheered.”
Chapter 21
A smile stretched across my face as I woke. How lovely to get a good night’s sleep, to see the sun’s bright rays threatening to burst through the edges of the thick curtains covering my windows.
Had I truly been moping just last evening? Now the world seemed welcoming, full of possibilities.
Something fluttered within my chest, pleasant but a bit frantic. Almost like . . .
I sat up, tossing my blankets aside. No, no, no.
Recognition washed over me, sharp and chiding. Memories of lying abed, daydreaming about Nicholas—the way his eyes sparkled when he made a secretive comment just for me, the way his touch sent tingles up my arm—mocked me.
Vander was attentive. Thoughtful, even. But that was no reason to start acting like a ninny. I could appreciate his kind gestures without thinking of him unnecessarily. Without wondering when I’d get to see him again.
Stomping to my wardrobe, I plucked the nearest etana from a shelf. It was time I learned to wrap myself in the ridiculous garments. I pulled the material over my head, then swiveled and tugged until it was mostly in place, letting the activity drive every last thought of Vander from my mind.
Victoria knocked from her adjoining room, then entered. She raised a hand to cover a yawn but stilled when her gaze landed on me.
“I—I’m sorry, m’lady.” She scooped up my discarded nightdress and laid it across the end of my bed. “I didn’t realize ye were so eager to get dressed. Ye should’ve woken me.”
Apparently, her surprise at my unusual behavior had temporarily eclipsed her anger.
“No need to apologize. I’d like to take my breakfast in my room, please. Something light—I’m not very hungry.”
“O’ course, m’lady. But allow me to help ye dress first.”
I took a deep breath. I’d have preferred to be left alone, but my agitation could quickly undo this small amount of progress toward reconciliation.
“I think I have a handle on it. While I appreciate your assistance, I’m sure you’d agree it’s important I be able to dress myself when necessary.”
“Certainly, but . . .” She bit her lip. “Ye’re doing well, m’lady, but I’m afraid ye’re a bit twisted in the back.”
“Am I?” Fire blazed in my cheeks. No wonder it’d been so tight around the waist.
Her laughter bubbled over like a fountain bringing forth water after a drought. “I’m afraid so. At least three times over.”
My laugh joined hers, chipping away at the thick layer of ice that had grown between us. “It seems I need more help than I thought.”
“Ye’ll get the hang of it, m’lady. I’m just glad ye didn’t leave yer room dressed like that.”
Our laughter mingled again, and I let her assist me.
Following breakfast, I paced my room like a caged leopard until mid-morning. I peered into the hall. No sign of Vander. Hopefully, his father had closeted him away with a stack of budgets or reports.
I stepped back into my sitting room. Victoria sat mending a skirt’s hem, her cold demeanor firmly back in place after encountering Petri on her way to get my breakfast. Gloom covered her cheerful disposition like a cloud blocking the sun.
“I’m going out for the morning. You needn’t accompany me.” No doubt she wouldn’t want to anyway, now that Egan wouldn’t be along.
She glanced up, a storm stirring in her eyes. Straightening, she returned to her work. “Very good, m’lady.”
I marched to the door without giving her a second glance. My feet led me out of the palace and toward Sir Colin’s before my mind even registered an intended destination. If the boots clattering in my wake were any indication, Tassos and Petri followed close behind.
My weakening resolve toward Vander was a mere matter of loneliness. Being homesick. Surely a visit with my Trellan friend would make an end of it.
Or at least bolster my spirits enough to face Vander by dinnertime, my polite reserve in place once more.
Sir Colin greeted me with his usual affability, but deep purple shaded the skin beneath his eyes.
I straightened my now correctly wrapped etana before perching on my usual chair. “Are you well, Sir Colin?”
“What?” He paused on his way across the room to blink at me.
“You seem a bit—tired—this morning.”
“Ah, yes. I did get to bed rather late last evening.” He pressed his fingers to his forehead. “More excitement in the village, I’m afraid.”
My chest constricted. “In Leipon? What kind of excitement?”
“Foolish, foolish man.” He rubbed a hand across his face. “I don’t believe you met Raimo the day you visited. He is a stern, proud fellow. Desperate to take his family away from the village to a better life. He found a rusty ax in the woods and thought with enough power he could . . .” He raised his hands in a helpless gesture. “I believe his goal was to turn it to gold or some such nonsense.”
“Could magic do such a thing?” I couldn’t help a bit of morbid curiosity.
“Only the most powerful. In Raimo’s case, inserting a spell into the ax gave it an energy of its own. He couldn’t contain it with his bare hands, at least not without injury.” He shuffled to a seat and sank into it. “The cut on his palm is deep. I fear infection.”
“How dreadful.”
My memories of Leipon seemed shrouded in haze, as though I’d visited a different world instead of an impoverished village only miles away.
“But I don’t understand. After witnessing such horrible results in their neighbors, why do these families keep trying to use magic?”
He leaned back, exhaling a sigh. “The consequences aren’t always bad, of course. Only the spells gone wrong require my attention. Some use magic successfully. I’ve heard of gardens growing at unnatural speeds, healings, tax collectors wandering away with empty hands, confused about why they came.” He reached for a teacup that wasn’t there. “To many, the benefit of a successful spell is greater than the risk of a negative outcome.”
