Murders & Romance, page 18
Dr. Newman shrugged. “You might be surprised at what’s listed there. After all, the objective here is for Lieutenant Hayes to not be your lieutenant anymore. Correct?”
Gerri smiled a smile that she felt on the inside. A smile that was genuine and rejuvenating. A smile that she hadn’t experienced in weeks.
“Yes! That is the objective. Thank you for pointing that out, Dr. Newman. I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of it.”
“You’re too close to the situation. Not to mention you’ve been through a lot. You’re grieving. You’re not thinking objectively. And it’s all perfectly normal behavior.”
Gerri laughed, and it was a light-hearted sound she hadn’t heard from herself in a long time.
“I’m going to check those postings while I’m here.”
“I think that’s a great idea. And since our time is almost up, I think you should go do that now.”
She stood and gathered her things.
“Thank you, Doc. I was so nervous about coming here today, but right now I feel more hopeful than I have in weeks. Thank you!”
“You’re welcome. I’m glad I could help.”
She rushed for the door.
“But Gerri!”
“Yes?” she turned back toward him.
“I’ll still need to see you again next week.”
“I know. Once a week until you feel I’m ready to go back to work. I understand. And I won’t cancel on you again.”
“All right. Have a good day.”
Gerri left Newman’s office on the second floor and walked around the corner. Beside the door to the dispatch office, was the huge bulletin board where employees posted everything from roommate searches to wedding invitations. But it also had a section that was reserved for department news, and a regularly updated listing of positions that would soon be opening up within the department.
Gerri’s breathing shallowed as she stepped closer and studied that list. It was a long shot, and she knew it. There was a good chance that there’d be nothing she was qualified for. Or worse, only positions she’d be overqualified for. But she was grateful to Dr. Newman for the suggestion all the same.
A listing caught her eye, and a slow smile sent a warm fuzzy zip of excitement up her spine.
She jotted down the particulars of the job listing in the notes app of her cellphone. Then she headed for the stairs and went up to the fourth floor.
She’d feared that stepping into the detectives pit would be as difficult as it had the last time she was here, right after Curt’s death. But somehow all she felt was welcome. A familiar sense of comfort and belonging wrapped around her like a warm shawl.
She stepped further in, staring at her desk and trying not to envision Curt sitting at the adjoining one. Before her emotions could get the best of her, she heard her name.
“Hey, Miller! You back?”
Gerri looked up to see Keisha Harris, one of her fellow female homicide detectives, coming toward her with a big smile.
“Harris! Hey, how are you?”
She gave her friend a hug and spotted a few other familiar faces now turned their way. One she didn’t see though was Keisha’s partner, Gary Barker.
“I’m good.”
“Where’s Barker?”
“In the hospital with a bleeding ulcer.”
“What? No!”
“Yeah. He’d lost so much blood they had to give him a transfusion that first night. A lot of us went down and donated blood in support.”
“Why didn’t you call me? I would’ve donated.”
“Oh, don’t worry about it. We all know you’ve been dealing with a lot. Besides, it’s been crazy around here the last few weeks. Barker’s ulcer, Wheeler had hernia surgery, so he’s out too.”
“He is?”
“Yeah.”
Across the pit, Gavin Hayes stepped out of his office and spoke to another detective, handing him a file. He looked surprised to see her, and he smiled and started walking toward them, but Gerri wasn’t able to return his smile.
“Wait. So you guys are down four detectives right now?”
“Well, yeah.”
Gerri bit her bottom lip and glanced around the pit. Why hadn’t Gavin told her they were so short handed? Why had he listened to her go on and on about quitting or transferring when they obviously needed her to get back to work as soon as possible?
Breaths suddenly didn’t come so easy when guilt sat on her chest like a ten-ton elephant.
“Now you look familiar. Hey, didn’t you used to work here?”
The voice came from behind her, and Gerri turned to see Pete Vega smiling at her. Ike Taylor came up the stairs right behind him.
“Hey, Vega!”
She gave him a hug.
“You look good.”
“Thanks.”
She turned and hugged Taylor too.
“Whoa!”
He jumped and froze.
The surprise of it caused Gerri to jump in turn, and her cheek brushed against his.
“Swoo!”
He inhaled a sharp breath and hunched up, as if in pain.
“Oh, my God, Ike! I’m so sorry. I completely forgot. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“It’s okay. It’s okay.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. It’s good to see you.”
Even as he smiled at her he shot a heated look over at Gavin, who’d joined them just in time to see her blunder in touching Ike. Gavin’s grin slid off his face, and Gerri wondered what that weirdness was all about.
“Pete’s right. You’re looking good, Miller,” Ike said to her. “How you feeling?”
“Oh, I’m okay. Getting there, anyway, according to Dr. Newman. I just came from an appointment with him. He’s not ready to clear me just yet, but he says I’m making good progress.”
“That’s all we can ask for then,” Ike said.
“I guess. I’m really sorry you guys are so short handed right now though. I had no idea.” She looked right at Gavin when she said it. He met her gaze, but looked away quickly, glancing once again at Ike.
“Aw, we’ll get through it,” Pete said.
“Yeah. Well, I should get going and let you all get back to work. Maybe I’ll swing by the hospital and say hey to Barker. Is he okay to have visits?”
“Oh, yeah. Cleveland Clinic, room 213. Tell him I’ll be by after my shift.” Keisha gave her arm a pat. “I’ve been relieving Becky each evening so that she can go home and have dinner with their girls and put them to bed.”
“That’s sweet of you.”
“That’s what partners are for, right? It was good to see you.”
“You, too. It was good to see all of you.”
“See you later, Gerri,” Pete said.
“Take care of yourself,” Ike said.
She waved at them all and then headed for the stairs. She glanced back in Gavin’s direction, and her stomach fluttered when she saw him watching her. Then she went down the stairs and headed out.
When Gerri was gone, Isaac looked at Gavin.
Gavin stared back at him for a moment, the air around them crackling with tension. Then without a word, he turned and walked back to his office.
Pete walked away, oblivious to anything wrong.
Isaac huffed out a soft breath and shook his head, then he followed Pete to their desks, wondering what the hell he’d just seen.
He sat down and began to look over the notes he’d taken during their latest round of interviews.
They’d spent the afternoon speaking to the family members of each of their three castrated victims, as well as a few students from both campuses who’d been close to the vics. None of what they’d learned sparked any hints, clues, or breakthroughs in their case. It was clear they needed to regroup and come at this case in a different way, but for the moment, Isaac was at a loss.
A loss made more confusing by the flash he’d just seen when Gerri Miller’s cheek had briefly brushed against his own when she’d hugged him. The good part was that Gerri was a decent person, so the pain had been minimal. But the flash. Well, that was another story.
What the hell had he seen exactly?
How long had it been going on?
And most importantly, what were they thinking?
Unable to concentrate on the work before him, he got up and headed for Lieutenant Hayes’ office.
The door was open. He stepped inside and closed it behind him, then he stood in front of the desk and stared at his boss.
Gavin never looked up, his attention focused on the paperwork he was filling out.
“We should talk, sir.”
Gavin sighed, dropping the pen, and finally looked up at him.
“What did you see, Ike?”
“Is Gerri wanting to transfer out because of you?”
He knew it was an extremely personal question, and he knew that Hayes could easily pull rank and tell him to mind his own eff’n business, or worse. But he had to ask.
Gavin sat back in his chair and folded his hands together.
“Have a seat.”
Isaac took a seat in the chair across from Hayes’ desk. It was strange, but he was getting used to being Hayes’ sounding board and his confidant. Since his recent promotion to sergeant, Hayes seemed to be pulling him in a lot more.
“Tell me what you saw when Gerri touched you.”
Isaac ran his hands over his thighs and hesitated for a beat.
“I saw the two of you… you know. In bed.”
Gavin closed his eyes and lowered his head for a second before he met Isaac’s gaze again.
“How long?”
Isaac couldn’t stop himself from asking.
“The sex, not long. Just a few days. The feelings? Several months.”
Gavin shook his head, as though he couldn’t believe it himself.
“I have fought so hard to avoid the situation I’m in right now. But it’s like… once Curt Dorn died, I worried about her so damn much. And I purposely stayed away from her for as long as I could. That’s why I hadn’t gone to see about her after his funeral.”
Gavin stopped and shook his head again, and Isaac could feel the turmoil bubbling up inside him. He took a deep breath and pushed his boss’ emotions away, and began reenforcing that imaginary concrete wall in his mind.
His boss’ weird headspace lately made so much sense now.
“You realize the dangers here, sir?”
Gavin’s gaze snapped back to Isaac.
“Of course I do. Why do you think I’ve been fighting it for months? I could be demoted over this relationship. I could lose my job. Not to mention I have Trey to think about.”
“Well, Trey’s almost a grown man.”
“Yeah, well he’s still mostly kid on the inside. And he’s been through a lot in the last year and a half with the divorce, and his mother remarrying and having a new baby. And now I’m going to spring a girlfriend on him? One who’s half my age.”
Gavin paused and ran both hands over his close-cropped hair.
“Gerri is closer to Trey’s age than she is to mine.”
He looked Isaac in the eyes, and Isaac got the feeling he was waiting on a reaction of some sort.
“Look, Lieu… I’m one of those people who thinks that age is just a number. The fact is, Gerri may be closer to Trey’s age in numbers, but the fact that she went to the police academy right out of college and has been on this job for the last seven years puts her closer in age to you in all the ways that matter.”
“I’m not sure I follow your logic, Ike.”
“Well, think about it. The things she’s seen and done on this job has given her an education that someone like Trey will never have, unless he decides to become a cop himself someday. At this point in their lives, she has much more in common with you than she does with him.”
Gavin stared at him for a moment, and Isaac could see his mind working. He slowly began to nod.
“I guess I never thought of it that way.”
“Is she bothered by the age difference at all?”
“No. She thinks I’m making more of it than it is.”
“I tend to agree.”
“You don’t seem shocked about this at all, Ike.”
Isaac shrugged a shoulder, realizing that he was now squarely involved in yet another conversation about a friend’s love life.
“Frankly, I don’t give a shit who you sleep with, sir. But I would hate to see you face any backlash over it. And I’d really hate for you to lose your job over it.”
Gavin nodded.
“I take it this is why Gerri was wanting to transfer out and go to another precinct?”
“Originally she wanted to transfer just to get away from me. She said it was too painful being around me everyday and not be able to be with me.”
“Wow. Sounds like whatever’s between you two is serious.”
Gavin nodded again and stared past Isaac’s head, like he was looking into the future.
“Feels like it could be, if it’s given a chance.”
“Then maybe you should. Give it a chance, I mean.”
“After we… crossed that line? Gerri actually offered to go through with the transfer to another precinct solely so that we can be together.”
Isaac nodded. “Sounds reasonable.”
“Does it, though?” Gavin met his gaze again. “I mean… can I really ask her to do that? Uproot her life to another precinct, just to protect my career? Somehow that feels like a jerk move, you know? Like I’m telling her my career is more important than hers.”
Isaac was shaking his head before Gavin even finished his sentence.
“But you’re not asking her, Lieu. She’s volunteering. And if I’ve learned anything about women, I’ve learned this. When it comes to matters of the heart, they don’t make big life-changing moves unless it’s important to them. So if she’s volunteering to switch precincts so that your career won’t be jeopardized, she’s doing it because being with you is important to her.”
Gavin stared at him and grinned.
“Since when did you become the love guru?”
“Hell if I know. But damned if I haven’t been drawn into the love lives of three other men this week besides you. Each of you asking for my advice, or my help in some way. Like I’m not still the socially awkward misfit with touch issues who just happened to get lucky when a beautiful woman decided she loved me.”
Gavin laughed out loud, and Isaac smiled.
“I guess desperation leads us dumb men to strange places sometimes.”
“Yeah, it does,” Isaac agreed.
Then he took a breath and leveled a serious gaze at his boss.
“Listen, Lieu… as someone who spent a whole lot of years alone and lonely, my best advice to you would be to choose happiness. If Gerri makes you happy, if you feel like what you have together can become something real and lasting… take the chance. Let her transfer. Make it work. Choose happy.”
14
Sidney scribbled furiously, dumping all the information flooding her brain onto the legal pad. There were so many ideas flowing, so many things to add to the checklist, to the rules, to the plan.
She’d been at her desk for several hours, lost in the idea of helping battered women escape from their abusers. She’d made pages and pages of notes, and gone over the ones she’d made the other day too, adding things and making revisions.
She paused and put down the pen. She shook her hand and wiggled her fingers, looking over the list she’d made. It was a series of questions for anyone expressing interest in her services. The first question was the hardest.
Are you sure?
So simple. But a person’s response to this one question would determine their success in getting away and staying under the radar. Because in order to succeed, they would have to completely sever ties with everyone in their present lives. Everyone — including parents and siblings and friends — in order to stay safe, and to keep loved ones safe from their abuser.
Sidney had been lucky in that respect. By the time she ran from Damien, he’d completely isolated her from her Aunt Bobbie and her cousins. They were the only family she had besides her brother, Simon. Since Simon had been overseas in Japan at the time, when she ran, she just ran. She didn’t have a problem severing ties with anyone.
“Hmm. But you’re not in hiding anymore, Sidney. And Damien is dead. Which means Aunt Bobbie and your cousins aren’t in any danger from Damien anymore.”
Zoe walked into the office and glanced at her.
“Were you saying something, Sidney?”
“Huh? Oh, sorry. I still have a bad habit of talking to myself sometimes. It started after my mom died when I was in high school. I used to talk to her, and it made me feel better. And that eventually turned into talking to myself. I did it a lot after I ran from Damien and was in hiding.”
Zoe sat down at her desk across the room and smiled at her.
“I can understand that. I used to talk to Hope that way after she died.”
“Your sister.” Sidney nodded, remembering the story of the sister Zoe named the women’s shelter after.
“Sometimes I still do.”
Sidney was about to respond when a timid knock came at the open door. They both turned to see who it was.
“Ann. What can we do for you?”
“Actually, I was hoping to speak to Sidney if that’s all right.”
“Of course, come on in.” Zoe waved her inside.
“Um…well…”
“Oh, I forgot.” Zoe popped up from her chair like bread from a toaster. “I have something I need to take care of. Excuse me.”
She winked at Sidney on her way out the door, leaving her alone with Ann.
Sidney stood and crossed the room to close the door so they could have some privacy.
“Why don’t you have a seat, Ann.”
“Okay. You said you wanted to see me. Is something wrong?”
“No, nothing. I just wanted to talk to you again about your request. You see, I need to know how serious you are before I agree to help you.”
“I’m very serious. I told you that! If the kids and I don’t get away from Donald, he is going to kill me. And I can’t leave my babies alone with him. Please!”
