Hot Texas Flash, page 16
We get farther apart every day, soon there’ll be not a thing left of what we had. And maybe it’s mostly my fault.
My fingers turn my engagement ring around on my hand and I ask myself what the hell am I doing.
Chapter 24
Nash
When I drive up to David’s barn my heart stops every fucking time. No matter where I look, I see Flash, hear her laughter. The burden of loneliness overwhelms me, but I can’t give in to it. This child needs me. I have to keep on the best face I can for her.
“Hey David, thought I’d get here before my horses pull in. Have you heard from John?”
“He’s an hour out. How’s it going?” David sees each strain on my face and his expression shows it.
“Fucked up. How is she?”
“As miserable as you are. I don’t know why you two can’t get past this. She loves you to the death and you feel the same about her. Can’t figure you guys out.”
“Nobody wants it worked out more than me. I don’t have a clue what to do. She said she needs time and space to get past the anger. When I told her about Lizzie it hit her hard and I made the big mistake of telling her over the damn phone.”
“That doesn’t sound like Flash. She’d do anything for kids, she’s fostered kids lots of time. You told her how it happened?” David asked.
“I did, but there’s some part of it she can’t get past. Maybe she doesn’t believe I’ve changed.”
“That might be it. She hates a man-whore and won’t have a thing to do with one. She’s mentioned how women from your past made catty remarks to her.” David’s expression shows concern which I appreciate.
“ I didn’t know about that. But the buckle bunnies chase all the guys, that’s common knowledge. And those women lie like a dog.”
“Listen, don’t give up yet. She might come around soon. Women are hell to understand and she’s harder than the others.”
“You know her better than anyone, what do you think? If she’s unhappy why does she resist me so hard?”
“I think she’s afraid you haven’t changed. Let me talk to her more.”
“I’d be past grateful for any help you can give. I’m at a total loss.”
Weeks passes with no call from her. I don’t expect one at this point, it’s been a few months now. David says he’s talked to her and I should stay encouraged. He claims it’s not done yet. I’d like to believe him but it’s hard when nothing has changed. She seems past finished with me from all I can see. I’ve gone over every interaction we’ve had, and I can’t figure what to do.
I should go snatch her up and bring her ass back here, whether she likes it or not. That’s how I’d normally do things but that probably wouldn’t work for Flash. I wish I knew what would work on her.
I miss the fuck out of that woman. Wish I could kiss her, smell her skin, plunge into her tight pussy. The memories of her never leave my mind even when other women offer up themselves. They don’t look bad, many of them are hot by most men’s standards, but there’s an element that’s missing.
Even Rhonda, who’s full on attractive. She’s chased me for years and I did throw her down a few times years ago in my drinking days. Now she’s tracked me like a hunter this last month with hopes to weasel into my life. I can’t go to the feed store in peace and then she was calling my cell till I blocked her. Have no idea how she got my number. The thought crossed my mind, for half a second, but my heart and every inch of my body fucking belongs to Flash, whether she wants me or not.
Thank God for this baby girl. Never thought I’d say that, but she takes the edge off my heartache with her sweet personality. I had the idea babies constantly cried and were a lot of trouble. That’s simply not true of Lizzie. She hardly makes a fuss. She’s one of those rare babies that goes to sleep happy and wakes up the same way. My Mom says she’s not ever seen a child of this age so content.
Each time I look at this little girl I remember how natural Flash is with her, how perfect it was to cuddle them into me that night. I can’t forget seeing those tiny hands griped onto the big tee shirt. That’s what I need to see again…forever.
There has to be some way to get my woman back. The thought comes to me again and again that we’ll go to Arizona and stay till she gives in, or takes off my ring and kicks me to the ditch.
I’m not one to wait and I’ve waited long past my limit. It’s not how I do life. I’ve tried it for her but it’s time to go back to my way of taking care of business.
Yeah, I’m done with this waiting shit.
A quick pack job of important kid items and a few things for me. If I miss something, I can buy it over there. When I tell my parents I’m going to Arizona they both grunt and say it’s about time. They know me well. Patience isn’t one of my best qualities.
Several phone calls get made to take care of business then I call David.
“Hey David, I’m off to Arizona, not sure how long I’ll be gone. Any message from you?”
“Just give her a big hug,” David says.
My foreman gives me a sideways glance when I tell him to have one of the guys load my rig, but he knows better than to ask too many personal questions.
“How many stalls do I need to ready, boss?” he asked. So I didn’t do a good job to keep my distress a secret. He knows I’m going after Flash.
“I’ll call you when I have an exact count.”
At daylight the next morning I pull onto the interstate, Lizzie squealing to be in the truck, this kid thrives on it. Our trip is easy so far and she’s slept much of the way and I’ve timed gas stops to her meals. The horses are in good shape with only another 100 miles to go. My plan was to arrive late afternoon and we’re on schedule.
I have no earthly idea of what I’ll say to her. I only know I need to get my eyes on her.
It’s Juan who answers the gate intercom.
“Juan, Nash Ellis here. Hey, I’m coming in with horses to stay for a while. Can you unload and throw them into a pasture?”
“About time you got here,” he chuckles and goes into Spanish to tell me how she’s been no good. “She’s in the barn.”
Chapter 25
Flash
I didn’t hear anyone come into the barn aisle, but I was bent over with a horse leg between my knees, a rasp in hand filing a sharp edge off a hoof. Hard to hear over that, add Miranda belting out “White Liar” loud enough to keep a bar jumping.
When I put the horse’s leg down and turn toward the tack room I’m face to face with Nash, Lizzie in his arms. He’s leaning against the wash rack watching me, a grin on his lips.
No! This can’t be.
I suck air, my shoulders jerk back. I lick my lips because suddenly my mouth is full of cotton. My eyes expand to plate size. This is crazy! Unexpected and I’m stunned. I need my brain function to return.
Christ sakes, I’m dirty, not a touch of makeup, my hair must look like a tangled-up bird nest. This is not how I’d want him to see me after all this time.
We’re locked in place, standing here, staring. It can’t be too long, but it feels like it is. In his eyes there’s a longing, a need, but his face is lit up bright. As in high spirits.
His grin says, ‘you need my cock.’ His eyes don’t leave mine as he waits for me to make a move of some kind, give him words of acceptance that I’ll allow him to be here.
Breathe, just breathe.
I’m soaked. Instantly. He’ll know it, he knows every time. My gaze follows his hand down to adjust his erection. So it’s not just me. I didn’t misread what just happened between us.
Lizzie throws her little body forward, her arms out reaching toward me as she bounces on him, her loud squeals so adorable.
I break my eyes from him and rush up to take her.
“There’s my pretty one. Look at this cutie girl.” Gentle pecks I place on her pink cheeks and glance at Nash.
“You didn’t call to say you were coming.”
“And let you tell me no?”
“So I could at least clean up.”
“But I like you dirty. And every other way.”
“What gets you this far from home?”
Thank goodness I can focus on the baby and hide the shakes in my hands. Well, maybe he doesn’t notice.
“I’m here to get my woman.”
I jerk around and glare up to him my mouth open and ready to say something to knock him back but I don’t get the chance.
“You got a problem with that?” His lips in a smirk.
His cocky ass smirk. That crazy, hot, sexy, smirk. The one that makes me weak and makes me hate myself for it.
I try to hate him.
Tension spins the air, more than one kind. Part of me wants to pick a fight with him, hurt him. At the same time, another part says no. I want an entirely different thing.
That’s so messed up.
He steps in close, puts his arms around me and gently holds us, resting his chin on my head. It’s the one little thing I’ve dearly missed. It’s his way to tell me how cherished I am. God yes, it filled my heart the way he cherished me, it truly did.
“Your woman, eh?”
He touches my ring.
“You haven’t taken this off and you’re wet and slick right now. That says you believe you’re mine.”
I lower my eyes staring down at my boots. I don’t like it when him affects me but damn it, he does. To have his hands on my pussy this second would be an answered prayer. Don’t let him see you react.
Too late. He sees it.
Then I recall the text messages I got a few days ago. They didn’t make sense then and I blew them off as a wrong number. I need to read them again. My stomach is in a full churn enough to throw up.
“I thought you might be here to take it back.”
“Not a chance of that.”
“I see.”
The corners of my lips pull, quickly I turn so he won’t see it then refocus on the baby before I pick up the barn phone.
“Rosa, we have company. Nash and Lizzie are here. Please have one of the men get the highchair from storage?”
I hang up the phone feeling his eyes drilling me.
“How long are you staying this time?”
“Till we’re married… or I take you back to Texas with me.”
“You do amaze me.”
My laugh belts out in spite of a strong push back. When I cut my eyes toward him he’s still eating me up.
“Amazement is required to deal with you, Angel.”
Thanks be for the break caused by Juan. I need to drop my shoulders down and take a few deep breaths.
“Nash, your horses are in the front pasture. These are the night stalls here.” Juan points to a row of stalls.
“These stalls okay with you, Flash?”
“Of course. Did you bring the colt?”
“Sure did, I can’t lose any time with him.” His face relaxes slightly.
“Good. I like that little guy.”
When I saw Nash there my heart completely stopped, my mind spun out of control, and electrical sparks flew through my entire body centered between my thighs. In one breath my breast ached against my bra and my soul felt peaceful. Somebody please, tell me how all of that can happen at the same time?
Every touch from him is a memory that plays like a movie across my eyes. It’s truly impossible to resist Nash. I hate to be one of those women who only thinks of sex, but he brings my nasty girl up to surface…and a lot of fight with it. The way he tosses me around, taking me in his rough way, so perfect it was.
Even more, I like everything about the man when he’s out of bed. All I can think of is how much I’ve missed him, how I want to run into his arms and stay there.
It amazes me how gorgeous he is in his rough way as he holds Lizzie with total comfort. It brings back to me the reason he said he took her. That puts him a cut above other men in my mind. I mean, what single man would take a baby? He could hire caretakers around the clock and never have to do any of her care, but he doesn’t. He hates to leave her with anyone.
I do admire what he’s done for her. I do. I just wish I could’ve had his child and not some other woman. Sounds selfish? I know.
“You’ve had a long day if you drove straight through,” I say.
Our conversation is strained but that’s to be expected I tell myself. It’s as if he has something to say to me.
In the meantime, both of us snatch side glances to test the flavor of the others lust and needful desires. It shows on both of us, I’m sure.
We need to rip each other apart in a dance of hard powerful connection. It’s in his face, the lines drawn across his mouth like that of a furious predator ready to kill his prey. He reads me like a worn book and senses what I need him to do…rip me apart.
Chapter 26
Nash
The shock on her face scares me. She’s standing frozen for too long.
Fuck No!
This has to work. I can’t let her shoot me down before it’s even off the ground. When that quick ray of hunger, a craving, flew across her face it was only a second, but I’ve seen it before, I know what it is. She’s soaking wet right this minute. Flash is a woman who’s on fire in her core, so ready and needy and I’m positive I’m the man who makes it flare up.
My hand automatically goes down to adjust my painful hard on. Her eyes follow again watching me reposition my cock. It only takes a few minutes of being near her and I have that same damn issue to deal with.
She blinks in slow motion, glances at my face just before she looks at Liz. A bright smile takes over her when my baby pats her tiny hands on Flash’s face. She can’t tell me she doesn’t care about Liz.
Our conversation eases into a comfortable zone faster than I expected. She asked again why I’m here, and I give her the same answer. That I’m here to get her.
My take is it’s shocked her, but she stays in check with some difficulty. She’s happy to see me, that I’m sure of, excited but pissed, and absolutely ready for me to take her pussy.
All I can think is Hallelujah.
She can deny it all she wants but she does fucking love me. I’m not out of the woods but I’m glad I came. I should have done it my way months ago.
Dinner is close to a Mexican feast, Rosa made sure of that. She seems to like me and has said before I’m the only man she’s liked in all these years. Juan shows his respect but is less verbal, as men are. Rosa doesn’t stop her chatter.
When desert is finished we move to the patio.
“Rosa, please check the guest room before you leave for the day. Thank you.”
She speaks kind to her people, and I don’t think it’s just for show. They respect everything about her. Hell, Rosa and Juan have been her for many years.
“We can bunk in my horse trailer. We’ll be good.”
“No, no. Do you have the travel crib? There’s plenty of room for it in the bedroom.”
“We don’t mind the trailer.”
“My ranch, my rules. Guest sleep inside the house.”
She grins and knows she has the upper hand on that.
“You’re the boss lady.”
The two of them play patty cake while I bring our bags into the guest room. My surprise that she’s invited me to stay here hasn’t settled in yet and I’m buzzed on all levels.
Why didn’t I come months back? That’s what I wanted to do but she told me no. I tried to respect her wishes but after a while I couldn’t. I think in the future I’ll just do things my way right from the start.
We get Lizzie fed, bathed and ready for bed. I put her down in her crib and she’s out before my hands are off her.
“If you’ll listen for her, I’ll catch a quick shower and meet you on the patio.”
“A little more wine?”
“I’ll have what you have.” I think of the times we’ve showered together. I try to clear my mind.
I need this short break to think over how it went. I actually expected her to throw a natural fit but she didn’t, instead she did the opposite. Not totally open arms. She’s not sure and is guarded but it’s melted a little already.
My decision to be straight forward on my intentions was the right one. Yeah, she was shocked, but it showed her I’d dead serious. She knows what it means to leave my ranch under the care of my foreman. That would only happen in case of a large emergency. It makes a statement to her that this is important to me.
Damn it! I need my dick to lay down and wait but it won’t as long as my mind drifts back to the times I’ve fucked us to annihilation in the shower. Wish she’d slip in here with me.
Juan’s comment comes to me and I wonder if he’d just say that. No, he doesn’t strike me as a man who adds things on. He knows her moods quite well. I have to believe what he told me. If I want to get this done, I have to figure out what’s holding her back.
Well, I can say without hesitation that she’s beautiful beyond words. Even more so than before. Her body says she’s worked hard since I saw her with more muscle laid on her arms and thighs. She’s probably been lifting heavy, plus everyday work.
What a totally gorgeous woman, so blazing sexy, dirty, and sweaty, smelling like her heated pussy. I do love this woman.
In spite of her instances that she won’t accept being told what to do, I clearly see she likes it when I take over. The gentle approach doesn’t seem to have much impact on Flash and that might be where I went wrong. I had to make sure I wasn’t overstepping the line. That’s not what I would’ve normally done. I’m a move forward and get the job done kind of guy.
I’m working to figure out what she needs but there could be a draw back to that. I’m thinking she likes the man I naturally am…a hard ass takeover kind of guy, too rough for my own good in and out of bed.
Yeah, I’ll give her everything she wants, and I’ll take what I need in the process.
