The Complete Works of L M Montgomery, page 338
“And is Mister Tillytuck married, I’m asking. Mistress Tillytuck! Oh, oh.”
“Dad didn’t say. But he’s to be here to-morrow so we’ll find out all about him. Judy, what have you got in that pot?”
“A bit av soup lift over from dinner. I did be thinking we’d like a liddle sup av it be bed-time. And lave a drop in the pot for Siddy. He’s gone gallivanting and it’s a cold night and mebbe a long drive home.”
There was no trace of disdain in Judy’s “gallivanting.” Judy thought gallivanting one of the lawful delights of youth.
It was a wild wet November evening, with an occasional vicious swish of rain on the windows. But the fire glowed brightly: Gentleman Tom was curled up on his own prescriptive chair and McGinty slumbered on the rug; Bold-and-Bad on one side of the stove, and Squedunk, a half-grown, striped cat on his promotion, on the other, kept up a lovely chorus of purrs: and Cuddles had a cherry-red dress on that brought out the young sheen of her hair. Cuddles had such lovely hair, Pat thought proudly. Nothing so pallid and washed out as gold, like Dot Robinson’s . . . no, a warm golden brown.
Judy’s soup had a very tempting aroma. Judy was past-mistress of the art of soup-making. Long Alec always said all she had to do was wave her hand over the pot. Mother was mending by the table. Mother had never been strong since her operation and Pat, who watched her with a jealous love, thought she ought to be resting. But mother always liked to do the mending.
“It will be the last thing I’ll give up, Pat. Most women don’t like mending. I always did. The little worn garments . . . when you were children . . . they seemed so much a part of you. And now your bits of silk things. It doesn’t hurt me really. I like to think I’m a little use still.”
“Mother! Don’t you dare say anything like that again! You’re the very heart and soul of Silver Bush . . . you know you are. We couldn’t do without you for a day.”
Mother smiled . . . that little slow, sweet, mysterious smile of mother’s . . . the smile of a woman very wise and very loving. But then everything about mother was wise and loving. When shrieks of laughter rang out she looked as if she were laughing, too, though mother never did laugh . . . not really.
“Let’s have a jolly evening,” Cuddles had said. “If this Tillytuck creature doesn’t like staying in the granary loft in the evenings this may be the last evening we’ll have the kitchen to ourselves, so let’s make the most of it. Tell us some stories, Judy . . . and I’ll roast some clove apples.”
“‘Pile high the logs, the wind blows chill,’” quoted Pat. “At least put a few more sticks in the stove. That doesn’t sound half as romantic as piling high the logs, does it?”
“I’m thinking it might be more comfortable if it isn’t be way av being romantic,” said Judy, sitting down to her knitting in a corner whence she could give the soup pot an occasional magic stir. “They did be piling the logs in Castle McDermott minny the time and we’d have our faces frying and the backs av us frazing. Oh, oh, give me the modern ways ivery time.”
“It seems funny to think of fires in heaven,” ruminated Pat, curling up Turk-fashion on the old hooked rug before the stove, with its pattern of three rather threadbare black cats. “But I want a fire there once in a while . . . and a nice howly, windy night like this to point the contrast. And now for your ghost story, Judy.”
“I’m clane run out av ghosts,” complained Judy . . . who had been saying the same thing for years. But she always produced or invented a new one, telling it with such verisimilitude of detail that even Pat and Cuddles were . . . sometimes . . . convinced. You could no longer believe in fairies of course, but the world hadn’t quite given up all faith in ghosts. “Howsiver, whin I come to think av it, I may niver have told ye av the night me own great-uncle saw the Ould Ould McDermott . . . the grandfather of the Ould McDermott av me own time . . . a-sitting on his own grave and talking away to himsilf, angry-like. Did I now?”
“No . . . no . . . go on,” said Cuddles eagerly.
But the ghost story of the Ould Ould McDermott was fated never to be told for at that moment there came a resounding treble knock upon the kitchen door. Before one of the paralysed trio could stir the door was opened and Tillytuck walked into the room . . . and, though nobody just then realised it, into the life and heart of Silver Bush. They knew he was Tillytuck because he could be nobody else in the world.
Tillytuck came in and shut the door behind him but not before a lank, smooth-haired black dog had slipped in beside him. McGinty sat up and looked at him and the strange dog sat down and looked at McGinty. But the Silver Bush trio had no eyes just then for anybody but Tillytuck. They stared at him as if hypnotised.
Tillytuck was short and almost as broad as he was long. His red face was almost square, made squarer, if possible, by a pair of old-fashioned mutton-chop whiskers of a faded ginger hue. His mouth was nothing but a wide slit and his nose the merest round button of a nose. His hair could not be seen for it was concealed under a mangy old fur cap. His body was encased in a faded overcoat and a rather gorgeous tartan scarf was wrapped around his neck. In one hand he carried a huge, bulging old Gladstone bag and in the other what was evidently a fiddle done up in a flannel case.
Tillytuck stood and looked at the three wimmen critters out of twinkling little black eyes almost buried in cushions of fat.
“How pleased ye look to see me!” he said. “Only sorter paralysed as it were. Well, I can’t help being good-looking.”
He went into what seemed an internal convulsion of silent chuckles. Pat jerked herself out of her trance. Mother had gone upstairs . . . somebody must do . . . say . . . something. Judy, probably for the first time in her life, seemed incapable of speech or movement.
Pat scrambled up from the rug and went forward.
“Mr . . . Mr. Tillytuck, is it?”
“The same, at your service . . . Christian name, Josiah,” said the newcomer, with a bow that might have been courtly if he had had any neck to speak of. It was not till afterwards that Pat thought what a nice voice he had. “Age, fifty-five . . . in politics, Liberal . . . religion, fundamentalist . . . gentleman-at-large, symbolically speaking. And an Orangeman,” he added, looking at a large picture of King William on a white horse, crossing the Boyne, that hung upon the wall.
“Won’t you . . . take off your coat . . . and sit down?” said Pat rather stupidly. “You see . . . we didn’t expect you tonight. Father told us you would be here to-morrow.”
“I got a chance up on a truck to Silverbridge so I thought I’d better take it,” rumbled Mr. Tillytuck. He hung his cap up on a nail, revealing a head thatched with thick pepper-and-salt curls. He took off his scarf and coat and the cause of a mysterious bulge at one side was explained . . . a huge, stuffed, white Arctic owl which he proudly set up on the clock shelf. He put his bag in one corner with his fiddle on top of it. Then, with unerring discrimination, he selected the most comfortable chair in the kitchen . . . Great-grandfather Nehemiah Gardiner’s old glossy wooden armchair with its red cushions . . . sank into it and produced a stubby black pipe from his pocket.
“Any objections?” he rumbled. “I never smoke if ladies object.”
“We don’t,” said Pat. “We’re used to Uncle Tom smoking.”
Mr. Tillytuck deliberately loaded and lighted his pipe. Ten minutes before no one in the room had ever seen him. And now he seemed to belong there . . . to have been always there. It was impossible to think of him as a stranger or a change. Even Judy, who, as a rule, didn’t care what any man thought of her clothes, was thanking her stars that she had on her new drugget dress and a white apron. McGinty had sniffed once at him approvingly and then gone to sleep again, ignoring the new dog entirely. The two grey cats went on purring. Only Gentleman Tom hadn’t yet made up his mind and continued to stare at him suspiciously.
Mr. Tillytuck’s body was almost as square as his face and was encased in a faded and rather ragged old grey sweater, revealing glimpses of a red flannel shirt which brought a sudden peculiar gleam into Judy’s eyes. It was so exactly the shade she would be wanting for the red rosebuds in the rug she meant to hook coming on spring.
“If ye’ve no objection to the pipe have ye any to the dog?” went on Mr. Tillytuck. “If ye haven’t maybe ye wouldn’t mind him lying down in that corner over there.”
Judy decided that it was time she asserted herself. After all, this was her kitchen, not Mister Tillytuck’s.
“Oh, oh, and is it a well-behaved dog he is, Mister Tillytuck, I’m asking ye.”
“He is,” replied Tillytuck solemnly. “But he’s been an unfortunate kind of dog . . . born to ill-luck as the sparks fly upward. Ye may not believe me, Miss . . . Miss . . .”
“Plum,” said Judy shortly.
“Miss Plum, that dog has had a hard life of it. He’s had mange and distemper once each and worms continual. He got run over by a truck last summer and poisoned by strychnine the summer before that.”
“He must have as many lives as a cat,” giggled Cuddles.
“He’s in good health now,” assured Mr. Tillytuck. “He’s a bit lame from cutting his foot with a sliver of broken glass last week but he’ll soon be over it. And he throws a fit once in a while . . . epileptic. Foams at the mouth. Staggers. Falls. In ten minutes gets up and trots away as good as new. So ye need never be worrying about him if ye see him take one. He’s really a broth of a dog, only kind of sensitive, and fine with the cows. I have a great respect for dogs . . . always touch my cap when I meet one.”
“What is his name?” asked Pat.
“I call him just Dog,” responded Mr. Tillytuck. And Just Dog he remained during his entire sojourn at Silver Bush.
“A bit too glib wid yer tongue, Mister Tillytuck,” thought Judy. But she only said,
“And what may yer mind be in regard to cats?”
“Oh,” said Mr. Tillytuck, who seemed quite contented with a whiff of his pipe between speeches, “I have a feeling for cats, Miss Plum. When I wandered in here the other morning I thought I’d like the people here because there was a cat on the window sill. It’s a kind of instink with me. So thinks I to myself, ‘This place has got a flavour. I could do with a job here.’ And how right I was!”
“Where might your last place be?”
“On a fox farm down South Shore way. No names mentioned. I’ve been there three years. Got on well . . . liked it well . . . till the old missus died and the boss married again. I couldn’t pull with the new one at all. Everything on the table bought and only enough to keep the worms quiet at that. A terrible tetchie old woman. Ye couldn’t mention the weather to her but she’d quarrel with ye over it. Seemed to take it as a personal insult if you didn’t like the day. Then she picked on Dog right along. ‘Even a dog has some rights, woman,’ I told her. ‘You and me ain’t going to click,’ I told her. I’m rather finnicky as to the company I keep,’ I told her. ‘My dog is better company than a contentious woman,’ I told her. ‘I’m nobody’s slave,’ I told her . . . and give notice. When I can’t stay in a place without quarrelling with the folks I just mosey along. Likely I’ll be here quite a while. Looks like a snug harbour to me. This arm-chair just fits my kinks. I’ve had my ups and downs. Escaped from the Titanic for one thing.”
“Oh!” Cuddles and Pat were all eyes and ears. This was exciting. Judy gave her soup a vicious swirl. Was she to have a rival in the story telling art?
“Yes, I escaped,” said Mr. Tillytuck, “by not sailing in her.” He put his pipe back into his mouth and emitted a rumble which they were to learn he called laughter.
“Oh, oh, so that do be your idea of a joke,” thought Judy. “I’m getting yer measure, Mister Tillytuck.”
“Not but what I’ve had my traggedies,” resumed Mr. Tillytuck. He rolled up his sweater sleeve and showed a long white scar on his sinewy arm. “A leopard gave me that when I was a tamer in a circus in the States in my young days. Ah, that was the exciting life. I have a peculiar power over animals. No animal,” said Mr. Tillytuck impressively, “can look me in the eye.”
“Oh, oh, and are ye married?” persisted Judy remorselessly.
“Not by a jugful!” exclaimed Mr. Tillytuck, so explosively that every one jumped, even Gentleman Tom. Then he subsided into mildness again. “No, I’ve neither wife nor progeny, Miss Plum. I’ve often tried to get married but something always prevented. Sometimes every one was willing but the girl herself. Sometimes nobody was willing. Sometimes I couldn’t get the question out. If I hadn’t been such a temperance man I might have been married many a time. Needed something to loosen my tongue.”
Mr. Tillytuck winked at Pat and Pat had a horrible urge to wink back at him. Really, some people did have a queer effect on you.
“I’ve always thought nobody understood me quite as well as I understood myself,” resumed Mr. Tillytuck. “It isn’t likely I’ll ever marry now. But while there’s life there’s hope.” This time it was at Judy he winked and Judy felt that she was not half as “mad” as she should be. She gave her soup a final stir and stood up briskly.
“Wud ye be jining us in a sup av soup, Mister Tillytuck?”
“Ah, some small refreshment will not be amiss,” responded Mr. Tillytuck in a gratified tone. “I am not above the pleasures of the palate in moderation. And ever since I entered this dwelling I’ve been saying to myself whenever you stirred that pot, ‘Of all the smells that I ever did smell I never smelled a smell that smelled half as good as that smell smells.’”
Pat and Cuddles proceeded to set the table. Mr. Tillytuck watched them with approbation.
“A pair of high-steppers,” he remarked presently in a hoarse aside to Judy. “Some class to them. The little one has the wrist of an aristycrat.”
“Oh, oh, and so ye’ve noticed that now?” said Judy, highly gratified.
“Naturally. I’m an expert in regard to weemen. ‘There’s elegance for you,’ I said to myself the moment I opened the door. Some difference from the girls at the fox farm. Just between friends, Miss Plum, they looked like dried apples on a string. One of them was as thin as a weasel and living on lettuce to get thinner. But these two now . . . Cupid will be busy I reckon. No doubt you’ve a terrible time with the boys hanging round, Miss Plum?”
“Oh, oh, we’re not altogether overlooked,” said Judy complacently. “And now, Mister Tillytuck, will ye be sitting in?”
Mr. Tillytuck slid into a chair.
“I wonder if you’d mind leaving out the ‘mister,’” he said. “I’m not used to it and it makes me feel like a pilgrim and sojourner. Josiah, now . . . if you wouldn’t mind.”
“Oh, oh, but I wud,” said Judy decidedly. “Sure and Josiah has always been a name I cudn’t bear iver since old Josiah Miller down at South Glen murdered his wife.”
“I was well acquainted with Josiah Miller,” remarked Mr. Tillytuck, taking up his spoon. “First he choked his wife, then he hanged her, then he dropped her in the river with a stone tied to her. Taking no chances. Ah, I knew him well. In fact, I may say he was a particular friend of mine at one time. But after that happened of course I had to drop him.”
“Did they hang him?” demanded Cuddles with ghoulish interest.
“No. They couldn’t prove it although everybody knew he did it. They kind of sympathised with him. There’s an odd woman that has to be murdered. He died a natural death but his ghost walked. I met it once on a time.”
“Oh!” Cuddles didn’t notice Judy’s evident disapproval of this poaching on her preserves. “Really, Mr. Tillytuck?”
“No mistake, Miss Gardiner. Most ghosts is nothing but rats. But this was a genuwine phantom.”
“Did he . . . did he speak to you?”
Mr. Tillytuck nodded.
“‘I see you’re out for a walk like myself,’ says he. But I made no reply. I have discovered it is better not to monkey with spooks, miss. Interesting things, but dangerous. So irresponsible, speaking romantically. So, as Friend Josiah was right in the road and I couldn’t get past him I just walked through him. Never saw him again. Miss Plum, this is soup.”
Judy had spent the evening swinging from approval to disapproval of Mr. Tillytuck . . . which continued to be the case during his whole sojourn at Silver Bush. His appreciation of her soup got him another bowlful. Pat was wishing father would come home from Swallowfield. Perhaps Mr. Tillytuck didn’t know he had to sleep in the granary. But Mr. Tillytuck said, as he got up from the table,
“I understand my quarters is in the granary . . . so if you’ll be kind enough to tell me where it is . . .”
“Miss Rachel will be taking the flashlight and showing ye the way,” said Judy. “There do be plinty av good blankets on the bed but I’m afraid ye’ll find it cold. There do be no fire since we didn’t be knowing ye were coming.”
“I’ll kindle one in a jiffy.”
“Oh, oh, thin ye’ll be smoked out. That fire has to be lit for an hour afore it’ll give over smoking. There do be something out av kilter wid the chimney. Long . . . Mr. Gardiner is maning to have it fixed.”
“I’ll fix it myself. I worked with a mason for years. Down at the fox farm they had a bad chimney and I built it over in fine shape.”
“Did it draw?” asked Judy sceptically.
“Draw! Miss Plum, that chimney drew the cat clean up it one night. The poor animal was never seen again.”
Judy subsided. Mr. Tillytuck possessed himself of his bag and his violin and his owl and his dog.
“I’m ready, Miss Gardiner. And as for the matter of names, Miss Plum, the Prince of Wales called me Josiah the whole summer I worked on his ranch in Alberta. A very democratic young man. But if you can’t bring yourself to it plain Tillytuck will do for me. And if you’ve warts or anything like that on your hands” . . . Cuddles guiltily put a hand behind her . . . “I can cure them in a jiffy.”
Judy primmed her mouth and took a high tone.
“Thank ye kindly but we do be knowing a few things at Silver Bush. Me grandmother did be taching me a charm for warts whin I was a girleen and it works rale well. Goodnight, Mister Tillytuck. I’m hoping ye’ll be warm and slape well.”
