Northbane Shifters Box Set, page 120
part #1 of Northbane Shifters Series
I took a step back.
Last night, I’d been tied up and treated like a criminal by this man. He’d stormed at me and then interrogated me. Now I was doing a 180 because I liked his body?
No, that’s not it.
It was because even though I’d seen Xander Bane completely pissed off and lose control, I’d never once feared for my life or safety. Even when he’d pinned me to that tree, I’d sensed how Bane only exerted as much force as was absolutely necessary.
For someone who’d ruined his secret, he’d been pretty damn polite toward me. I couldn’t say that, if I’d been in his position, I would’ve acted with restraint. Once he’d determined I wasn’t a threat, he’d gotten me a healer and brought me into his home.
Hell, Bane had claimed me to keep me safe. I’d been expecting to be tossed out or locked up.
I knew, deep down, my guard was loosening up around him, and I’d been desperately trying to come up with ways to dislike him all day. This morning, I’d gone and gotten all soft because of the affections that the one-eyed healer pirate, Rogda, had shown Bane. Then, I’d gotten flustered because he’d helped me put on a damn jacket. Now, standing in his home, watching him cook, probably for the two of us, it hit me.
We were roommates. We were going to be living together.
There was no way I could keep up this façade of cynicism and disinterest.
Not with my hormones rampaging around and shutting down logical functioning. Some small and sane part of me began to back up. I needed to go upstairs, bury myself in those blankets, and get a grip. Maybe plan my escape from Winfyre. I couldn’t handle all this male right now. Not only because Bane had a fine ass and people looked up to him, but because I was afraid I might start letting myself…
No, Bane and I needed to be kept far apart. Like a North Pole-to-South Pole magnitude of distance.
I can’t stay here.
My foot had found the bottom stair when he spoke. “Spilled something on my shirt.”
Under that granite and seriousness was a hum of kindness and amusement.
That hum startled me more than the shirtless vision. I jumped backward, hit my elbow on the railing, and let out a muffled grunt of pain. Bane turned around, and my head began to swim even more. Between the pain and the perfection of the male body in front of me, I wasn’t even sure I was awake. Maybe I was still upstairs, in bed. Hell, maybe I was still locked in one of Lind’s cells.
This has to be a fever dream.
Wiping his big hands on a towel, Bane came over, and I tried to erase the wounded visage from my face. But I’d clipped myself good, and those nerves were screaming with outrage, probably because they were missing out on lighting up like every other nerve in my body.
“Hit your funny bone?” Bane asked, and the genuine concern in his voice had the floorboards warping from under my feet. Before I could stop him, he’d taken my arm and was inspecting my elbow. I could smell soap, cloves, and that warm, spicy wood smoke on him. “You got yourself good—it’s already bruising. Come on.”
Now I was being led into the kitchen. What was happening?
Maybe this guy was impossible to hate. Before, I'd thought myself up to the task, but at this moment, a foot away from those defined pecs, hard abs, and thick arms swirling with tattoos, feeling the heat radiating off of him, I didn't think anyone could be.
Hell, the man could mesmerize a cold-hearted demon.
“I’ll get you ice,” Bane was saying as we entered, and I choked down a laugh.
Fool that I was, too, I allowed this to happen. Worse, I immediately regretted it. The light was brighter and softer here, doing wicked things to the shadows and planes of his torso. Torrents of electricity were going off under my skin, and the part of the forearm he held was on fire, I thought.
When Bane let go of me, I let out a long breath and sucked a slower, longer one in.
I had to get a grip here. I had to…
“Is that a sun?” I asked, momentarily distracted. My fingers reached out towards a gorgeously rendered sun covering his shoulder, with a lotus symbol underneath it and stylized waves around it. “It’s so beautiful.”
Not only was his body breathtaking, but those tattoos were pure artistry.
“Oh,” Bane said and glanced down. “Yeah, took me a while to design it.”
“You-you designed this?” I asked and made the mistake of meeting his eyes. “How?”
“Pen and paper,” Bane said, looking like he was fighting back a smile. Then, an uncertain look flashed over his face, and something about it broke my heart a little. “I designed all of them. I mean, I didn’t tattoo them on or anything. Just dabbled in drawing.”
“Dabbled?” I croaked and let my hand fall to my side.
My eyes wanted to peruse each glorious inch of inked skin, to memorize the hard edges overlaid with beautiful brushstrokes. I may have, too, if Bane hadn’t held up a bag of ice. Hastily I took it, pressing it to my elbow to distract me.
Bane nodded. “Don’t have much time for it nowadays.”
Go back to being handsome and far away and not good at drawing, I thought desperately. Out loud, I mumbled, almost at random, “You shouldn’t cook without a shirt. It’s dangerous.”
A small chuckle escaped him. “Sure. That’s the real hazard of my day to day.” He leaned back against the counter, but still managed to tower over me. “Think you’ll live, Tiani?”
My name was three smooth syllables on his tongue. As though he’d tasted every corner and worn them down. And, once again, it was a mistake to meet his eyes. Electricity gathered at the base of my spine, then shot up along it and numbed my tongue. The sheer magnetism and power in that gaze, never mind that body, undid me. I gaped at him, wondering dimly if he was flirting with me or was genuinely concerned his shirtless body had rendered my brain to mush. The latter seemed more plausible.
“Are you sick?” Bane asked, and cool fingers pressed to my forehead.
At that touch, my stunned logic and hard processes came back online. Bane wanted to make sure the elbow I’d massacred was all right. I nodded and feigned a yawn that turned into a real one.
“Yes,” I said, faintly. I had no idea how much time had passed since he’d asked, although it felt like a few centuries. He pulled back his hand, and I tried not to lean forward or look like I was missing his touch. “Took a nap, and I’m out of it. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have bashed my elbow.”
Bane’s face cleared, and he nodded. “I’ll be right back.”
He shut off the stove, went into the other room, and pulled on a loose black flannel shirt. At first, this was better, but I could still see the definition of his body when he moved in a certain way. And the memory was already seared into my brain. Oh, he wasn’t getting out of there anytime soon.
When Bane came back, he asked me to wait while he fixed two plates, then took the ice bag from me to drop it in the sink, and had me follow him to the table. As we sat down, I cast a glance around the room, noting the quiet creature comforts. It occurred to me, then, it was thanks to the Winfyre Coven that they existed. Probably that Beylore I’d met last night. Those Riftborn had figured out how to get derenium and firsase crystals to produce clean, copious amounts of energy. As of yet, it worked only on smaller appliances, but I’d heard that they were still trying to get cars working again. I was probably in the small minority who wouldn’t be sad if they didn’t come back.
Bane had tucked in, comfortable and completely at ease. As hungry as I was, I found myself pushing my roast potatoes around the plate, eyeing the broccolini with a sort of melancholy and despairing of the chicken, which I was pretty sure was flavored with rosemary and garlic and cayenne pepper. Oh God, he is perfect. And completely out of reach.
Even if Bane deigned to give me the time of day outside of necessity, he’d still be as distant as the moon. The elusive dragon of Winfyre. Sitting here, I could’ve choked on the irony of it.
This is too much. These goddamn Northbane.
At that moment, it was intolerable. I almost wished I’d wake up in my cell in Kizin Mountain.
Anything was better than this.
“Something wrong?” Bane asked. There was less humor in his voice than before, an impatience I was sure he didn’t quite realize. “Do you want something else?”
"Why are you doing this?" I asked and looked up at him.
With only a glimpse, I’d seen the reality of Winfyre and sensed how lovely and peaceful this place was. If I spent more time here, I knew it would only get worse. And I was sure it all tied back to Bane. His expression was impassive, but there was a searching look in his eyes, so I dropped my gaze to his hands. I think I already had a crush on his hands. Strong, long-fingered, and capable. Tiny white scars adorned the knuckles. He laced his fingers together, and the tendons stood out.
I swallowed. Hard. Before last night, Xander Bane and Winfyre had been the ghosts, and Lind had been the threat breathing down my neck. Now Lind was the ghost, and Winfyre was gloriously welcoming.
Bane was real, almost too much so. Real from his hands to his forearms resting on the table, his elbows and shoulders, his tall and strong body sitting squarely across from me. From his enigmatic blue eyes with gold lights to his kinky black hair drying from a shower. From his scent on my tongue to his food on my plate. I was in his home. He’d cooked me dinner. He was real.
Panic cramped my chest, crimping my nerves into disarray, and questions stormed through all my defenses. I put a hand to my head, which was swimming, and the other to my stomach. For a second, I thought I was going to throw up.
“I feel like I’m in a really weird dream,” I blurted out, and my face went hot.
“You dream about me?” Bane asked, a little impish.
“Bane, don’t be an ass,” I snapped, panicking even more. If he flirted with me, I was done for. “You say your secret is so important to Winfyre’s security, so what are you going to do with me? What can you do?” I pressed a knotted fist to my chest, and my heart galloped underneath it. Trying to get out. “What have I done? What can I do? I can’t—I can’t fix this.”
Standing abruptly, needing to get away from the false promise of a normal dinner and the absurdity of this situation, I paced over to the window. Exhaustion was making my bones shake and stirring up the dread in my head.
Maybe I can still find a way out of this mess. Somehow. Escape to the Tiselk.
“Tiani,” Bane said from behind me, and I flinched at my name.
I wished both that he’d go back to calling me Miss Elkhadi and, at the same time, that he never would. I wanted to hear my name in every cadence and mood of his. I clenched my jaw. What was happening to me? Why did I give a damn about Bane? I didn’t know him, didn’t care about him…
But you want to. You want it so bad, you’re cracking apart at the seams.
“I apologize,” Bane continued, coming closer. “I thought food and rest were more important than getting into the nitty-gritty of the claim and your unique position now."
“I don’t like uncertainty,” I whispered.
“Yeah, Iris said something like that,” Bane said as he came up next to me. I glanced over at him, and he gave me a small smile. “We spoke today at length. She doesn’t know you’re here yet, but that’s only a matter of time.” He held out his hands, a gesture of peace. “What would you like to know? Seriously, ask me anything. I’ll do my best to answer—within reason.”
Can Orion hurt Iris if she is in Winfyre? And why did Orion want me here?
Shit, I can’t stay here anyway. If Orion…
“Is Orion gone?”
Bane hesitated, and the blue of his eyes darkened. “At the moment.”
Fear dug into my heart, a dull and fast iron spike. “You think he’s going to come back?”
“I put nothing past him.”
The grimness of that statement echoed through me, and I heard Orion’s dark laugh whispering behind it. If Orion wasn’t gone, I couldn’t be here. It was as simple as that.
“At the moment,” Bane went on, as though hearing my thoughts, “Orion is gone, and I have more pressing concerns. If that changes, we’ll deal with it then. I can’t waste time worrying about things that might happen when I have other problems to deal with.”
The polite distance of both his posture and his tone was killing me. But I was too tired to comment on it or try to wrap my brain around it. Maybe my finding out his secret had made him more aloof, or maybe he was like this all the time.
“So, me and you?” I asked. “We’re—what? Secret roommates with dangerous secrets?”
Chapter Eight
Xander
I found it telling that it was over a nice meal and in the comfort of a nice house that Tiani’s shell began to crack. Out in the woods and even in the holding cell, she’d been unfazed.
Give her a nice room, good food, and polite company? She went straight to pieces.
I wondered if Tiani even knew how tightly she was holding herself right now. Not physically, exactly, where the only tell was the white dents by her nostrils and the nervous drum of her fingers on her crossed arms. No, it was more her voice and the flicker of her eyes.
To be in so much constant motion, looking over your shoulder, and to slam abruptly into a wall that stops you—it was hard to taper off such furious adrenaline. Your body might be able to relax to an extent, but the mind would keep spinning, whispering to the body to keep running and looking. It had finally all caught up with her.
The four walls didn’t keep out the darkness; rather, they kept Tiani in.
Iris had said that Tiani’s impetus was always being on her toes, ready for anything and always pushing forward. Tiani could be a bit of a control freak and liked to have everything lined up. The stress of her capture, Orion’s return, her ignorance of Iris’s safety and heroics, the threat of Lind—she didn’t believe it was over. She was poised for this to fall apart, unwilling to relax and enjoy herself. Too afraid she’d lose it to let herself love Winfyre.
In a way, I probably understood that better than anyone.
However, what I didn’t know, at least not exactly, was where we went from here.
Even though Iris hadn’t said as much, I didn’t think Tiani was exactly a go-with-the-flow person. At least, not like she was. Tiani’s tendency seemed to be to put her dukes up and throw down with anything, anyone, and every problem that came her way.
Since I’d left Kal and Iris that afternoon, I’d been trying to figure out how to explain that to her. How to tell her I was as completely at sea as she was. That the claim was a paltry attempt to try to fix the unfixable. An easy way to pay the predator’s price.
But at the same time, I had to walk a careful line of not revealing more of Winfyre’s or my own secrets, as well as still being the Alpha of the Northbane.
Stalwart and stern were our secret bywords.
Plus, deep down, I still wasn’t completely sure I could trust her.
Unwittingly—or, even more scarily, perhaps not—Tiani had hit it on the head when she’d said we were secret roommates with dangerous secrets.
I had to give her something. “Listen,” I said. “I’ve been trying to figure that out all day. I mean, technically, yes, we are roommates. But I don’t…” I dragged a hand down my face. Tiani looked worse than she had this morning. “What I want, in the end, is to take the burden of my secret off of you. For now, I’m going to have to settle for less. And even though this claim seems like it might be a fetter, in the long run, I hope it can help us come to a mutually agreeable solution.”
“Were you a politician in a past life?” Tiani grumbled. “You’re good at spinning shit.”
I cleared my throat before the angry sound could escape me. “What would you prefer? A holding cell in the mountains? I’m not going to lie and say I didn’t consider that.”
“I’d like for you to stop pretending that I have a say in this,” Tiani said, and her chin lifted. “You’ve been calling the shots since I stepped into your territory, Bane.”
“Dammit, Tiani. You snuck in and found out Winfyre’s biggest secret—that I’m a dragon shifter.” My voice was harsher than I intended. “What the hell am I supposed to do? Congratulate you? That secret was—” I swallowed hard, stopping myself. “You know what? You’re right.” She gave me a sharp look. “To an extent. Both our hands are tied, however. This is still Winfyre, and everyone has to pay the predator’s price. Sometimes they get to choose. You didn’t.”
Tiani simply nodded.
“I told you last night—I can’t let you go.” My voice had dropped into a softer, more persuasive note, and I thought I saw Tiani’s posture loosen a fraction. “I apologize. I don’t want any of this for you. But, like it or not, you’re now a threat to everything we’ve worked for. Years of work, mind you.” She flinched. “It’s not just on you, though. So, I’m trying to be courteous, trying to do the best I can for you, who wound up in this position by mistake, as I would do for anyone.”
Tiani kept her gaze on the floor, and a lurch went through my gut. I'd said more than I meant to, but I thought I'd been fair and honest, at least. Couldn't deny I'd been a little reticent about my reasons, though.
She must really hate me.
“If you’re that uneasy or uncomfortable living here, with me,” I said, far more hesitant and not wanting to admit how much that would hurt if it were true, “I can secure lodging elsewhere. Maybe with one of the Vixens or—”
“No, I—” Tiani glanced up, and her face was complicated. I couldn’t determine any one emotion, as they’d jumbled together into a knot of distress behind her eyes. “I’m not being fair to you.”
Of all the things I’d thought she would say, that staggered me the most. “Excuse me?”
“I was questioning your motives a little, but now I think I get it,” Tiani said. “You’re right—I am a liability. I didn’t want to admit that. And you were trying really hard not to make me feel worse, even though this is all my fault.” She gave me a shrewd glance as I stared at her. “Although, I’m also guessing that you were also in the wrong place at the right time.”
