Lesson in Romance, page 16
Alex shook his head, as if trying to jog his memory. “No, we’ve never met, but haven’t I seen you before?”
Her father stared him down, then shrugged. “I don’t know. You tell me. And while you’re at it, why don’t you tell me why you’re disrespecting my daughter.”
“Your daughter?” Alex whipped around to look at her, and her veins went icy with fear.
“Cara is my daughter. Do you have a problem with that, young man? Now, you better start talking…or start walking.”
“Daddy, please,” she begged. “Let us have a moment to ourselves and we’ll get this worked out.”
Alex looked up at the ceiling. “Wait a minute.” He snapped his fingers so loud that the sound echoed off the foyer’s plaster walls.
He turned his attention on her father. “You’re Judge Williams.”
“I believe that’s what I already said, young man.” He turned to Cara. “He may be rude, but he’s smart,” he wisecracked.
“You’re the one who gave my twin brother that harsh jail sentence.”
Her father held up his hand. “Whoa. My sentence always fits the crime.”
“Does the name Michael Dovington ring a bell?”
Her father scratched his beard. “No, I’m afraid not. But then again, thousands of cases hit my bench every year. How do you know I was the judge in your brother’s case and not someone else?”
“My mother showed me your picture in the newspaper. She wrote you a letter. She asked you to have mercy on my brother. She called and called, but you never responded. Not even once. He died in jail because of you!”
He shook his head. “Listen, son. I don’t remember any letter. And why would I? I probably get hundreds of those every year. They’re all the same to me. Desperate measures from desperate people,” he scoffed.
“Daddy!” Cara cried out. Although she wasn’t surprised at his insensitive comment, she hurt for Alex.
He took a step toward the judge, one hand clenched into a tight fist. “You bastard!”
Cara stepped in between the two men. “Alex, Daddy. Please don’t do this!”
He turned toward Cara, his forehead creased in anger. “And you knew the entire time, didn’t you? How?”
Her chin quivered and her voice was watery. “When I was a teenager, I saw you and your mom on television talking about the letter she wrote. Then I went upstairs to my father’s office and I found it. Unopened.”
“My mom was right all along. You never read it,” he said, more to himself than to them. “I trusted you, Cara.” His voice broke. “I trusted you!”
She put her hand on his arm but he shook it off. “Alex, I wanted to tell you, but…”
“But what? You thought I was too dumb to understand? Well, I may not be able to read War and Peace, but I can read the writing on the wall. It says you’re a liar, just like your father.”
He took an envelope out of his coat, tossed it at her feet. “You don’t want to see me again? Well, Daddy’s little girl’s gonna get her wish.” Then he pulled open the door and stalked out.
Tears of shock flowed down Cara’s face. Her body wouldn’t move, her mind only held one horrible, heartbreaking truth.
He’s gone.
Her father picked up the envelope and closed the door. He led her into the living room and handed her a box of tissues.
“I don’t know who that young man is, but he is obviously in love with you.”
She blew her nose and squinted at him, puffy-eyed. “Daddy, that’s Alex Dovington. The famous jazz saxophonist. Don’t you recognize him?”
Her father made a face. “The guy that’s always in the paper with a different woman hanging on his arm like a Christmas ornament?”
Cara giggled, in spite of her sadness. “That’s him.”
“I don’t recall the case.”
“His brother was a gang member, and I guess his mom always thought he was innocent of the crime.”
Her father rolled his eyes. “All mothers think their sons are innocent, even when the evidence proves that they’re not.” He sighed. “Maybe that’s for the best. Gives these boys some hope, even when they don’t stand a chance.”
He cast a curious glance at the envelope. “He seems pretty taken with you. What’s the nature of your relationship?”
“Alex is illiterate. I was hired to teach him how to read within a very short time frame, in exchange for a donation to Beacon House. I should have told him the truth from the very beginning, but there never seemed to be a right time.”
She ran her hands down her face, smearing her makeup even more. “I didn’t want to lie to him, but God help me, I didn’t want to lose his donation.”
“And now you’re afraid you won’t get it?”
She shrugged. “We have a contract, but I’m not sure if he’ll live up to it.”
“Well, if he doesn’t pay you, let me know. I know a couple of lawyers who’d be glad to take your case.”
“That won’t be necessary. Besides, it doesn’t matter now. Whether he sends it to me or not, it will never be enough to save Beacon House.”
“Don’t give up yet,” he chided gently. “I can’t help you with your love life, but at least I can do this.” He rose to leave.
“Thanks, Daddy.”
After they said goodbye, she took the envelope into the kitchen and eyed it suspiciously. When she opened it, she discovered a CD inside with no label on it, and she popped it into the player. Her mouth dropped open when she heard her own voice through the speakers.
It was a fully produced recording of her singing his ballad. Alex must have mixed in the piano, bass and drums, as well as himself on saxophone, after she’d left the studio.
She began to cry uncontrollably as she listened to her sing words she’d written herself:
I can’t understand
Why you ever
Left me
Now is the time for you and me
To take a chance on love
And as the song began to fade and Alex played the last note, she crumpled to the floor and sobbed, “Now is the time to say goodbye.”
Chapter 14
Alex propped The Jungle Trumpeteer on the music stand and opened it to the first page. He attached his saxophone to his lariat, made sure he was comfortably seated, then played a couple of blues scales to relax. His travel coffee mug was on the floor next to him, plus a cold bottle of Pellégrino.
Everything was in place. There were less than twenty-four hours before the start of the tour and he was ready to review the book. Yet there was one thing missing.
Cara.
His heart was filled with regret over the fight they’d had last night. He wished he could take back all the awful things he’d said to her. He could see on her face how much his words had hurt her, something he never wanted to do.
He hadn’t come to her home to fight, but to make up. To tell her again that he loved her, that he couldn’t live without her.
She sure was right about one thing. He really didn’t know her at all.
Had he fallen in love with a fantasy?
He clamped his eyes shut and her beautiful face, one he would never tire of adoring, floated through his mind.
Why did she have to lie to him? Why couldn’t she have just told him the truth from the very beginning?
If she had, would you have still fallen in love with her?
Alex’s eyes flew open, and he hung his head because he knew the answer was no.
If he had found out that the Honorable Crawford Williams was Cara’s father, she wouldn’t have made it past his doorstep, let alone into his bed. He would have done anything he possibly could to get out of the contract and the book tour. He’d even have risked increasing Mo’s displeasure with him.
Instead, he’d been played for a fool. And now his career could be over anyway.
This afternoon, he was scheduled to meet with Mo. He planned to tell the hard-nosed owner of Sharp Five Records about his illiteracy, before he read it in Friday’s paper. And if he knew Mo as well as he thought he did, the man would not be happy. When he walked out of Mo’s office, he wasn’t even sure he’d still be a part of the artist roster.
At this point, he didn’t care.
Meeting Cara’s father last night was horrible enough. He came face-to-face with his own guilt and he knew he’d never be the same person again. He’d blamed Judge Williams for Michael’s death for so long that he’d come to believe it himself.
Yet he was the one responsible.
He ran a hand over his head, remembering the night when his life had changed forever. He’d just gotten off the train from playing a gig uptown, and the leader of the BJD (Brooklyn J-Dawgz), the local gang at the time, was waiting for him with his hand out as usual. He held a knife to his neck when Alex wouldn’t give them his gig money. Then he took his saxophone and threw it down onto the tracks, and a few seconds later, the train crushed it.
Alex closed his hand into a fist in anger at the memory. “What are you gonna do now, bro?” the leader had said. “How you gonna earn me some money? I guess you gotta steal one now.” The he pressed the tip of his knife into Alex’s neck, drawing blood.
Michael was with him that night. He said he would steal the saxophone, and took Alex’s place in the gang, so that Alex could continue to make music and money for their family.
Alex hugged the stolen saxophone to his chest and buried his face in his hands. The last time he’d cried was at Michael’s funeral. When his brother died, Alex had sealed his heart up so tight no one could get in.
Until he met Cara. Then everything changed. He felt alive when he looked at her sweet face, when he touched her gorgeous body. Her talent, intellect and humor sparked an energy within him that he thought was long dead.
And when they made love, he fit within her deliciously, perfectly. She seemed to be created just for him. He hardened just thinking about their nights together.
God, he missed her.
But there was no way in hell he’d ever try to get her back again.
Since he was a kid, he’d always told himself he’d put his heart on the line only once and if it got tossed back in his face, that was it. He would never take another chance and risk getting hurt again. And he knew in his heart that he would never love another woman like he loved Cara.
But what saddened him the most was that his love for her was only beginning. There were many more feelings and emotions to be explored that would never be experienced.
Alex took a sip of his coffee and gagged. Cold.
He rubbed a hand down his face and took a deep breath. He pulled the music stand closer and began to slowly read aloud. He was on his own now, and he had to make the best of it.
With a sigh, he began to read. Slowly, he spelled and sounded out the letters as Cara had taught him. It was hard, and he had to pause several times and take a breath to quell his frustration.
When the doorbell rang and he jumped up to answer it, hope lodged in his heart.
“It’s about time…” His words fell away at the sight of Judge Williams. It took everything in him not to slam the door in his face.
He stared hard at the portly man. “Judge Williams, to what do I owe this unpleasant surprise?”
“May I come in?” His eyes blinked rapidly behind his Malcolm X glasses. “I need to talk to you.”
A twinge of fear gripped him. Had something happened to Cara?
With a resigned shrug, he stepped aside so Williams could enter, then shut the door and led the way to the living room.
“Have a seat, your Honor,” he said with mock authority.
Judge Williams removed his trench coat, laid it carefully on the arm of the couch and sat down on the leather couch. The cushions whined, but the man didn’t seem to notice.
Alex eased into a chair across from him, his face impassive.
Crawford adjusted his glasses. “After you boldly accused me of judicial indiscretion, my curiosity got the best of me. Today, I did a little digging around.”
His eyes drifted to his saxophone and Alex felt his stomach plummet. He tightened his grip on the instrument that had been the source of so much joy and pain over the years. How had he let things get this far?
Crawford regarded him a moment. “I may have judged your brother too harshly. The BJD were getting too bold with their criminal activity. They needed to be stopped.”
“So what are you trying to say? That you needed my brother to be an example?”
“It wasn’t just him, but something like that.”
“Michael’s dead. He can’t be an example to anyone, so, what’s your point?”
“You know, Alex, the mind can be the worst jail cell on earth for a brother struggling to forget the mistakes he made in the past. Don’t make Cara suffer because you’re still struggling to break free.”
Alex’s heart dropped into his stomach. Everything the judge said made sense. Letter or no letter, although he had no one to blame for Michael’s death but himself, maybe it was time to let go of the pain and the guilt that had haunted him for years.
Crawford rose to leave, laying his coat over his arm. “I’m due back in court, not that I’m in any hurry to get there.”
Alex escorted him to the door. “Why’s that?”
“Son, I’ve got a double homicide case waiting for me. My fourth this month.” Crawford shook his head, blew out a harsh breath. “New York. The city where killers never sleep.”
Alex opened the door and the judge walked out without another word.
“Judge Williams,” he called out. “Why did you come here and tell me all that?”
He turned on his heel and looked at Alex. “Because I love my daughter, and I think you do, too.” Then he hailed a cab and sped away.
He’s right.
Ever since he’d met Cara, there wasn’t a moment when she wasn’t on his mind. She was part of his dreams, his very being, and his desire for her had only grown stronger and more powerful the longer he was away from her.
Clearly, she did not feel the same way. So if he could only love her from afar, that’s what he would do. He would go on with his own life, but he would love her. No one else. It was as simple as that.
As he gathered up his saxophone and other things he needed for his tell-all meeting with Mo, his mind was formulating a plan. It was a long shot, but if it worked it would fix everything and show his love for Cara at the same time.
Although he wasn’t a religious man, his lips moved in a silent prayer for hope, redemption and second chances.
* * *
Cara slammed the phone down and cradled her forehead in her palms, another no clanging in her ears like a church bell. Every moment of the last twenty-four hours had been more miserable than the last. It took everything in her to lift up the phone to plead for help. After a morning of rejections, things were not looking good.
She didn’t know how much more of this she could take.
In just under a week, her life had drastically changed. She’d fallen in love, lost her man and was on the verge of losing her business. In the time it took God to create the whole world, she’d managed to nearly destroy everything she’d ever worked for in her own life.
She stretched her hands above her head and yawned, then flopped her head back on her arms like a rag doll. She’d been up half the night crying and listening to the CD he’d given her over and over.
Alex had given her his heart, told her that he loved her. But he probably hated her now. She had betrayed him out of fear, and that was unforgivable.
Her heart wrenched when she thought about him, what she’d lost. She reached up and stroked a single flower in the large arrangement she’d received from Alex yesterday morning. The vase was filled with flowers of many sizes and varieties. She inhaled the scents as she reread the card tied with a red ribbon to a Gerbera daisy.
I didn’t know what flower was your favorite, so I bought one of each. I can’t wait for our next game of Scrabble. I love you.
Alex
She shook her head. While he was choosing the flowers, he’d probably never imagined that he would discover that she was hiding a secret that would ultimately end any feelings he had for her.
Nancy’s voice, patched through the intercom, broke through her thoughts.
“Cara, I’m sorry to disturb you, but you have a visitor.”
“What? I thought you canceled all of my appointments for today.”
“I did.” Nancy’s voice dropped to a whisper. “But this man insists on seeing you.”
“Who is it?”
“Tommy Jenkins. Do you know him?”
Her heart sank. “Yes, send him in.”
A minute later, Cara greeted Tommy warmly at the door. “It’s great to finally meet you in person.”
His hand felt old and rough on her palm and his smile held the glow of a child on Christmas morning. She felt herself smiling back when she wanted to do nothing but cry.
Tommy hung up his coat and sat down. “Beautiful flowers. Looks like a rainbow exploded. I can appreciate color.” He pointed to his bright yellow hat. “I’ve got one for every mood.”
She chuckled. “Oh? What mood are you in today?”
“Thankful. And I think you’ll feel the same in due time. How did things go with Alex?”
“You haven’t spoken with him?”
“I have, but I want to hear from you.”
“Things were difficult at first,” she admitted. “Alex put up plenty of roadblocks, but then he relaxed and learned to trust me. After that point, it got much easier to teach him.”
