Lesson in Romance, page 11
Her body, tight with desire, strained up toward his mouth when his tongue dipped into her belly button. Laying his cheek upon her abdomen, he released his hands from her breasts and stroked them down her thighs, easing them apart. Cupping her buttocks, he knelt and then gently lifted her to his waiting lips.
Alex kept his eyes on hers as he hovered there, inches away, hot breath on her skin, and she whimpered and twisted with yearning. His tongue flicked like a serpent’s and she writhed in response and he tightened his hold. Then lips met flesh and he began to suck and lick her into another dimension.
She leaned up on her elbows. Watching him dip and dive his tongue increased the pleasure and the frenzy for both of them.
“Unh…mhhhh,” she cried out, dropping her head back, her hair blanketing the pillows.
Twisting and bucking in his grasp, he brought her close, so close she thought she would pass out. She sank back into the bed, mewing with pleasure, and stretched out her hands to him.
The angles and curves of their bodies melded together in utter need. Alex wove his hand through her hair, brought her lips to his. Penetrated and claimed her as his own.
Oh, how good he felt inside her.
How delicious his mouth tasted.
How perfectly in rhythm they moved together.
He moaned as she wrapped her legs around his waist, urging him to go deeper, rock harder. The primal dance of their bodies thumped flesh upon flesh. Tempo increased, his hands tangled in her curly locks, his mouth never leaving hers. Both seeking, climbing and pleasuring each other without bounds.
“Ahh…lex,” she moaned, arching her body into his as he probed her core, thrusting into that secret place that broke her in two.
Her inner flesh held him captive, pulsed and rippled, until soon his entire body stiffened. With a guttural cry, he exploded into her, releasing bright bursts of pleasure that brought tears to her eyes, and she clutched his tight buttocks and rocked to heaven with him.
Their lips, bruised and swollen from their lovemaking, continued to move and explore each other. Both desperately trying to stay in the moment, wishing they could stop time.
As the night ebbed away into morning, neither wanted the pleasure to end and their uncertain future to begin.
Chapter 10
Alex propped himself on one elbow and admired the beautiful creature lying asleep next to him. He loved mornings, but for the first time in his life, he wished the sun wouldn’t rise. There was only one word to describe last night: glorious.
Never before had he felt such a sense of oneness with another woman. It was like Cara had been created for him and he was created for her. There was no way he would ever let her go.
In a few minutes, the entire room would brighten. He didn’t want the sunlight to wake her before he had a chance to think. He’d never told a woman he was falling in love with her, and he didn’t want to screw up.
Speaking his emotions verbally had always been difficult. Words could be rejected, thrown back at his face or used against him.
Words were also so…final.
If only he could play his saxophone, then he could tell Cara his feelings through his music. That was one reason why he loved playing so much, he could express whatever his feelings were on the spot, through his horn.
He never would have dreamed something positive would come out of his illiteracy. Not only was he learning to read, but because of Cara, he was learning to feel without remorse and love without boundaries. He felt incredibly blessed to know her.
You can’t have love without truth.
The thought sucker-punched him, and he lay back upon the pillow and let out a quiet breath.
Would she still care about him if she learned the truth about his past? He didn’t think he could bear it if any feelings that she had for him turned into fear.
No, it was too risky, he decided. Things were still too fresh between them. Telling her now would end their relationship before it ever really began.
He turned and propped himself on his elbow again, allowing his eyes to rove her body. Lush, full breasts. A baby-got-back behind. Legs that shouldn’t even be legal in the fifty states, much less the U.S. territories.
Her lips were parted slightly, inviting him to bring her home from dreamland. She was a sight to behold. Asleep or awake, he could simply not resist her.
He traced a finger down the tiny crease below her nose. Slowly he lowered his lips to hers and kissed her softly on each corner of mouth before moving to the middle. He nudged her lips open and she moaned as his tongue slipped inside.
Her arms wrapped around his neck, and he deepened the kiss, pleasuring the warmth inside her mouth. He broke their embrace for only a second, noting that her eyes were still closed but her lips curved into a smile.
Slipping under the cool sheets, his lips hungrily sought the underside of her breasts, and it pleased him enormously when her nipples stiffened immediately at the touch of his lips.
His erection was painfully hard and he wanted nothing more than to penetrate her warmth right now. But this wasn’t about him, it was about Cara. And this time, when he entered her, he wanted to see her eyes.
He dragged his lips away from her breasts and cupped her face in his hands.
“Good morning,” he murmured low into her ear. “How’s my little night prowler?”
He kissed her eyelids, and when she opened them his heart dropped. He didn’t see desire there. He saw regret.
He took his hands off her face. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”
She shook her head and seemed to struggle to form words.
“Cara, what’s wrong! Talk to me!” His voice bounced off the walls, louder than he intended, but damn, she was scaring him.
He reached out to stroke her hair, and his heart lurched when she jerked away, her eyes as wide as saucers.
“I shouldn’t be here,” she whispered. “Oh, my God.”
“What are you talking about?” He reached for her hand again just as she was about to leap from the bed. She tried to jerk her hand away, but he held tight. “No, you’re not going anywhere until you tell me what’s going on.”
Her cheeks were flushed, making her even more beautiful. “Last night was a mistake! That’s what’s wrong,” she yelled.
He felt like he’d been slapped.
“What?”
“You heard me. Last night never should have happened, Alex. We…I made a big mistake. Now let me go!”
She wrested away from him and started toward the door, but he leaped out of the bed and slammed it shut before she got there.
He tried not to be distracted by her nude body, but it was difficult.
“Wait a minute. You come into my room and seduce me, and now you’re going to walk out just like that?”
She nodded and started to reach for the doorknob.
“Like hell you are!” He grabbed her hand, turned her around and pinned her to the wall as he smothered her lips with a kiss that was meant to pleasure them both and prove to him that the passion he felt from her last night wasn’t a dream.
“Kissing you like this is a mistake?” he urged, his voice thick with longing for her.
Her body clung to his as he planted his mouth all over her face and neck before settling back on her lips again, his hard, naked length crushed painfully between them. Their tongues entangled hot and loose with the kind of passion lovers have the freedom to release and the freedom to deny.
She pushed him away again. This time he didn’t resist.
“I can’t do this. It’s the last day we have together to finish the book. I can’t teach you under these circumstances.”
“Then why did you come into my room last night?”
Why did you make me fall in love with you?
She wiped her mouth, her eyes blazing. “I—I don’t know. I can’t explain it right now. All I know is that it can’t…it won’t happen ever again.”
She covered her breasts with her hands. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I want to shower and get dressed. I’ll meet you downstairs in an hour so we can wrap this up.”
Without another word, Cara opened the door and walked out.
Alex sank down onto the bed. His brain was trying to process a range of emotions—rejection, confusion, anger. But his heart felt only one thing: love.
As far as he was concerned, recess was over. He didn’t know what kind of game Cara was playing, but he wasn’t going to stop pursuing her until he won her heart.
* * *
What have I done?
Cara leaned against the wall sobbing quietly as hot water pelted her body like tiny whips.
For the second time in less than two days, she’d made a colossal mistake that hurt both of them. She wished that the immense ache in her heart could be whisked away down the drain as easily as her tears.
It wasn’t supposed to happen this way, and she wasn’t supposed to feel like this.
All she’d wanted to do was seduce Alex, to pretend that she was his lover for one night, to do something daring for once in her life.
But her little experiment had blown up in her face. The intended result never involved actually falling in love with him.
Yes, he was the most gorgeous man she’d ever known and yes, he had fulfilled her every fantasy last night. But loving him and desiring him was wrong when she had not been completely truthful with him from the very beginning.
It wasn’t like she hadn’t had ample opportunity to set the record straight. When Tommy had called her to hire her, she could have said that she couldn’t possibly teach Alex for personal reasons.
Or even before she’d stepped over his Harlem threshold, it would have been appropriate to tell him who she really was—and give him the opportunity to tear up the contract in her face if he chose.
But she’d done neither. Instead, she chose deceit over decency, and now she’d destroyed something before it even had a chance to begin.
Alex was the only man who’d ever made her feel like she was the most beautiful woman on earth. To be desired by Alex was a wondrous thing, but to be loved by him, to be his alone, was a dream that could never be fulfilled.
Not if she wanted to keep Beacon House open.
There was no question in her mind that her loyalty to the Harlem community far outweighed her need to be in any romantic relationship. Helping people change their lives was what she lived for. Not love. Not heartbreak.
Even though she cared deeply for him, she couldn’t let last night get in the way of her goal. Somehow she had to get them back on track before it was too late.
She only had a few hours to make sure he could read the children’s book comfortably and with no errors. After today, if he still needed additional help, she would refer him to one of the other literacy centers in the city.
But how was she going to get through the next few hours and hide the way she felt about him? How would she get through a lifetime without loving him?
She squeezed her eyes shut at the dull ache in her heart, the settling-in-for-winter kind of hurt that wouldn’t easily go away with chocolate, ice cream or an afternoon nap. It was the kind of ache and longing that could only be eased by the man you loved, loving you in return.
Did he love her? The answer to that question sparked both hope and fear. She’d always wanted a man like Alex to love, and to love her. He was gorgeous, intelligent and talented beyond measure. He would be a difficult man to forget, let alone her feelings for him.
She turned off the water, wrapped herself in a towel. She rubbed the steam from the glass and when she looked in the mirror, she saw a woman in love. One who could not possibly be with the man she adored, and the tears fell again.
* * *
Alex whistled as he expertly flipped pancakes on the griddle, hoping the delicious smell would entice Cara to emerge from her bedroom. No woman could resist his homemade, melt-in-your-mouth, write-home-to-your-momma flapjacks, complete with a side of bacon and fresh-squeezed orange juice.
What better way to discuss their future than over a hot breakfast?
She had to eat, and at some point she had to talk about what happened between them this morning. He deserved to know why she’d walked out, and he wouldn’t take “no comment” for an answer. By the time they left for Harlem that evening, he had to have a foolproof plan in place for seeing her again.
“What’s all this?”
Alex turned at the sound of Cara’s voice and smiled. The sweater she wore was his favorite shade of blue and accentuated her curves in the most distracting way.
Remember. Look, but don’t touch.
“Breakfast, of course,” he said, sliding the last of the pancakes onto a platter. “It’s nearly ready. Why don’t you have a seat?”
He couldn’t help but notice her eyes, so vibrant and alert last evening, were now puffy and tired. It hurt him to think he was the cause of her tears, and made him all the more eager to make things right again between them.
He walked over to her and cupped her elbow to lead her to the table, but she jerked away.
“I’m not hungry,” she mumbled.
He frowned, trying but not succeeding to hide his disappointment from his face. “You haven’t eaten since we went to Idella’s. And I don’t know about you, but hot, steamy sex like we had the pleasure of experiencing last night always makes me hungry the next morning,” he added, raising a brow.
She rolled her eyes. “I don’t need to be reminded that you’ve been with other people, Alex.”
He bit back a smile at the jealous tone in her voice. She still cared about him. What she didn’t know was that none of those women could compete with Cara. They were his past. She was his future.
“I wasn’t trying to remind you of anything,” he assured her. “I was only stating a fact. Don’t you want to get to know me?”
“Of course I do, but like you said yourself, there are some things that should be left unsaid.”
“Agreed.” He raised his right hand, voice booming. “Thou shalt not speak of past relationships.” He could see that she was trying not to grin. “I’m sorry,” he said, extending his hand. “Apology accepted?”
Their eyes locked in a battle of egos. She nodded, and when she placed her warm hand in his, it took everything in him not to pull her into his arms.
He released her hand and let out a breath. “Let’s eat.”
Cara eyed the huge spread of food. “You shouldn’t have gone through all this trouble.” She sat down, spreading a napkin across her lap. “This is a feast fit for a—”
“Queen,” he interrupted, grinning.
Her cheeks reddened and she poured the coffee. “I don’t know how you can think about eating, when we have so much to do today.”
“Easy.” He gulped down some juice. “I’m a guy.”
She rolled her eyes. “That old excuse.”
He watched, amused, as she stacked three pancakes, followed by four pieces of bacon on her plate.
“Um. For someone who said she wasn’t hungry—” He tilted his head toward her plate. “I’m just sayin’!”
“And I’m just leaving,” she retorted with a glare, and rose to get up from the table.
Alex burst out laughing and grabbed her hand. “Geez, Cara. It was a joke. Sit down and eat as much as you like.”
They ate in silence for a while, and he wondered what she was thinking about, and if her thoughts had anything to do with him.
He was on his second pancake when he couldn’t take the quiet any longer. “I made this breakfast special for you,” he blurted out. “To thank you for all you’ve done for me this weekend.”
He wiped his mouth, took her hand in his. “Around you, I’m not ashamed that I can’t read. I’m not ashamed…to be me.”
Her eyes were gentle. “Being illiterate is no reason to be ashamed.”
“I know that now,” he admitted, feeling the weight of a long-held burden lift off his chest. “And I couldn’t have done it without you. I can’t do it without you.”
He paused, cleared his throat. “I want you to continue to be my teacher, for as long as it takes. What do you think?”
She took her hand from his and turned to look out the window, the sunlight dancing upon her corkscrew curls. He smiled at the memory of playing with her hair last night as she fell asleep in his arms.
Desire rolled through him again and he clenched his fist against it, then realized she hadn’t said a word.
“Wow, you’re awfully quiet. I hope that means you’re thinking about all the wonderful ways you want to say yes to me.”
She turned back and shook her head. “It wouldn’t work, Alex.”
“What are you talking about? We’re a great team.”
“Yes, but it’s not that simple.”
“Sure it is. All you have to do is open your mouth and say ‘yes.’”
Her lip quivered. “Last night changed everything,” she insisted, her tone unfriendly and professional. “We…I crossed a line that never should have been crossed. Severing ties is the only right thing to do.”
He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He reached for her hand, and his heart clenched when she moved away and crossed her arms around her chest.
It hurt him to think she wanted to drop out of his life so easily after all they had shared this weekend, both emotionally and physically.
“Severing ties? It sounds like you want to cut off a limb,” he said, half joking. “All I’m asking is to continue the great work we’ve been doing.”
“There are plenty of qualified literacy teachers in the city. As soon as we get home, I’ll call Tommy and give him a couple of names to check out.”
