Holiday Terminal, page 7
“It was for a long time. Because you broke my heart.”
“I broke your heart?” I snort and shake my head. “God, Pen, you really do have this whole situation twisted around in your head. You devastated me when you walked away from me on that beach. Devasted me.”
Her eyebrows shoot up, and genuine confusion crosses her face. “Really?”
I nod and lean back in the chair, those awful feelings flooding back again despite my desire to leave them in the past. “I couldn't figure out where things had gone so wrong. How we went from planning our lives together to you essentially saying it was over and my leaving town. All my plans to come back vanished in that instant, and I went home, went off to school, did everything my parents asked, and became exactly who I was supposed to be in their eyes. I did everything to try to forget you.” I sigh and shake my head. None of those things worked. Not really. Every day, I carried a piece of her in my heart. “Things would've been so different if you would have just told me.”
How I wish she would have told me.
She sniffles, and I glance at her to find tears running down her cheeks.
Her bottom lip quivers. “I thought I was protecting you and him. I thought I was doing the right thing. I was young and stupid. Please don't make him pay the price for my mistake. You can't take him away from me and everything he’s ever known. Please, Art, please don't do that to me.”
I clench my jaw as her words bounce around my head. “I deserve a chance to get to know my son, Pen. You can't argue with that.”
She shakes her head and wipes at the tears. “I'm not.”
“As far as custody is concerned…” I throw up my hands. “I don't have a fucking clue what to do. This whole situation is just so…complicated. I don't even know where you live now.”
“Oh…Nashville. I work for Ward Music. Aaron Ward. He’s an amazing producer who’s teaching me the business. Mom came down to help me with Max over the Christmas break. I had a meeting today, but we always spend Christmas in Cape Harmony. We were on our way to Mom and Dad’s house when we had to land.”
My eyes travel over her again. Penelope Barnes is still the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. Infuriating but drop-dead gorgeous. And seeing her all grown up, dressed professionally with her fuck-me heels on, it’s hard not to imagine what it would be like to be with her now. “No time to change after your meeting?”
She bites her lip and shakes her head. Then, she grins. “Nah, this is just how I always travel. You know, casual and comfortable.”
I bark out a laugh and slap my hand over my mouth. I almost forgot about my son sleeping on her lap.
God…my son.
We both freeze, and Max shifts but settles back down just as quickly.
I lean over until my lips are a hairsbreadth from Penelope’s ear. It’s easy to tell myself it’s so I won’t wake up Max, but part of me just wants to be that close again. To inhale her scent. She still smells the same—crisp and clean, and like everything I’ve always wanted—and it takes me right back to those carefree nights on the beach and in the boathouse. “You always were kind of a smartass, Pen.”
She turns her head toward mine and meets my gaze. “And you weren't?”
I shake my head and feign incredulity. “Me? Never. But you…it was one of the things I always loved about you.”
Her cheeks flush at my words, and she ducks her head and wipes away the last of the tears.
There are a lot of things I love...loved about Pen, and something tells me nothing has really changed. She's still the same outspoken, happy, driven girl who wanted to achieve so many things. She didn’t let getting pregnant and raising a child on her own stop her.
And instead of feeling resentment toward her over the way things went down, pride starts to bloom in my chest over what she's managed to accomplish, all on her own.
She's impressive, really.
Which leaves me in a difficult position.
Is it possible to get what I want—to know my son—without hurting her?
Chapter 9
PENELOPE
I want to trust his motives where Max and I are concerned. I really do, but the one thing I learned during that summer was that the Warrens can’t be trusted. Ever. They are raised to be conniving, weaselly, backstabbing, and entitled.
Back then, I thought Artemis was different.
I wanted to believe he was different. Stupid girl.
I trusted him when he said he wanted to break away from what his family was all about and carve out his own path in this world—one that included me. But those were the naïve dreams of a seventeen-year-old.
It was all we talked about that entire summer. How he wasn’t even sure he wanted to be a lawyer, let alone a politician. How he knew his father would go crazy if he tried to do anything else. That he had a plan, or at least, he told me he did. That night changed everything, though.
For all of us.
Whether he really would've stayed or not is irrelevant at this point. The deep damage has been done. To both of us. Max has already missed out on having his father in his life for five years, and Artemis has missed watching Max grow up. That's on me. I'll have to carry that regret for the rest of my life.
There seems to be a glimmer of hope for the man sitting next to me, or at least, there was at one point. But there isn't any for the rest of that plan he once had. Those days are behind both of us, and that summer is long gone. I don't want my son drawn into the middle of the Warren empire, and I can’t see a way for Artemis to be involved in his life without that happening. He’s firmly planted at the center of it, poised to become the CEO of Warren Enterprises Worldwide when his father retires. And who the hell knows when that might be? It could be ten years; it could be tomorrow. He doesn’t have the ability to step aside.
It’s what is tearing me in two right now. I can’t keep Art from knowing his son any longer. I don’t want to hurt him, but Max has to be my priority. He always has been. The Warren family is poison. They crush and ruin anything and anyone who stands in the way of whatever prize currently catches their eyes. I can’t allow Max to get caught up in that kind of life.
Speaking of the little angel. Max stirs and sits up, rubbing at his eyes.
“Hey, big guy.” I rub his back gently. “You have a good nap?”
He turns to me and frowns. His tiny pout always gets me. “I thought maybe we got to Grandpa's by now.”
I sigh and glance out the window behind us. The snow still falls steadily, and winds continue to whip it up into twisting tornadoes of ice. It feels like this storm will never end.
The one outside and the one raging in my heart.
While Max was out, I saw Clarence and another employee going in and out of the office with our pilot. But no one came to offer any updates, which means there aren't any good ones.
Still stuck.
I kiss Max on the top of the head. “Sorry, buddy. It looks like the storm isn’t over.”
He whimpers softly and huffs. “Where’s Grandma?”
I point over to where she sits in the chair across the terminal, her head fallen back against the wall. “Looks like she’s sleeping, too.”
So jealous.
I’m exhausted. I’ve been awake and on my feet for almost twenty hours at this point. The rollercoaster of emotions I've experienced the last several hours has only served to drain my energy even more. But I can’t sleep right now. I can't leave Max.
A yawn gives away my desire for a catnap, and I stifle it with the back of my hand.
Artemis taps my arm. “You want to get some sleep?”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, I’ll watch Max so you can rest a little bit.” He seems to know my concern without me having to say the words. His hand finds mine, and he squeezes it tightly. “I'm not going anywhere, and neither is Max. Where can I go?” He nods toward the window. “That storm means we’re all stuck here in the terminal. You're exhausted and need to sleep.”
As much as I hate to admit it, he’s right. I’m being irrational about this. They can’t go anywhere, and he’s Max’s father. He would never hurt him or let something happen to him.
A slow grin spreads across Artemis’ lips—the one that always made my stomach flip-flop and still does—and he leans down and holds his hand up to Max for a high-five. “Max and I will hang out. It'll be fine.”
Max turns on my lap to look up at me. “You sleep, Mommy. I’ll hang out with your friend Art-mus.”
Artemis chuckles at his inability to pronounce his name. “You can call me Artie.”
The offer of a break is too enticing to turn down, and Max seems so excited about hanging out with him. “Okay. Thank you.”
Max jumps from my lap and digs in his bag for his tablet. “Mister Artie, come see what I have.”
Artemis grins at me and points. “I need to go see the game he has.”
My chest tightens as I watch him stand, move over to his son, and scoop him up into his arms.
How wonderful could our life have been had he stayed? How different would everything…all of us…have been?
He carries Max over to another set of chairs near us and sets him on his lap, whispering in his ear.
I should probably be concerned about what he’s saying to him, but deep down, I know he would never reveal the whole “I am your father” thing without us discussing it first.
It’s going to take some explaining and adjustment for everyone. Especially me. I’m so used to not having to discuss Max or his needs or wants with anyone. No one else has ever had a say in his life. Things are going to be so different.
My heavy eyelids droop. I lean back in the chair and prop my head against the cool window behind me. I have a lot to figure out, but my heart and mind are so very heavy and tired.
Maybe by the time I wake up, we might just have a Christmas miracle.
ARTEMIS
“And if you press right here, it makes him jump, and then you can collect all the coins.”
I bend over to watch what Max does on the screen. The technology these kids have is so far beyond my old video gaming systems, I wouldn’t have the first idea how to play this thing. “Wow, that's really neat. You're really good at this game.”
He grins up at me, and my heart just about bursts.
Is this what it feels like? Is this how all parents feel looking at the faces of their own children? Like the entire world occupies their tiny bodies? Like they’re the most beautiful things on the fucking planet? How can I already feel this way when I only just met him?
I guess it's natural. Something ingrained in humans to make them love and be protective of their child. I may have missed a lot of time with him, but I'm just so thankful I have the opportunity to get to know him now. I will take every second with him I can get.
Penelope is already sound asleep as the storm rages just behind her, outside. She must be exhausted, physically and emotionally. I sure as hell am. This little boy is a bundle of energy, and she's been doing it all alone for so long.
“So, you see, I run and run and run and then, I jump, and I get all of them, and then I win.” Max leaps up from my lap and cheers, his little fists flying up over his head in victory.
So damn cute.
He’s so carefree, so completely oblivious to the turmoil happening around him.
“Good job, buddy.” I hold up my hand for a high-five. “You're really good at this.”
He climbs back up on my lap. “I know.”
I stifle a laugh.
“Hey, Mister Artie, can I have more chocolate?”
The half-eaten box still sits on a chair near Pen. “What did your mom say?”
This is the first real test of my parenting. I don’t want to fail.
Max's face falls. “She said I had enough chocolate.”
I figured as much. I shake my head. “If your mom said you had enough, then you can't have any more right now.”
He scowls and crosses his arms over his chest. “Fine.”
The pouting is so adorable, I can’t even be mad about it. I remember being that age and trying to get one of my parents to override the other to get what I wanted. Smooth attempt. The kid is smart.
I tickle his sides, inducing a fit of giggles, and he squeals on my lap.
“Stop it! No tickles.” He flails and chokes on his own laughter, his anger over the chocolates dissipating.
“Don't be mad, buddy. Too much candy can make you sick.”
“That's what mommy always says.”
“Your mom is very smart, so you should listen to her when she tells you things like that.”
I grab the bottle of water I bought earlier from the floor and take a swig.
His brow furrows as he considers my words. “Do you listen to my mommy when she tells you to do things?”
I choke on the water and almost spew it across the room.
Max stares at me with concern twisting his lips. “Are you okay, Mister Artie?”
I shake my head and cough. “Yeah. I'm fine. Your mom and I used to be…” I trail off, searching for the right words to politely explain our relationship to a five-year-old, “very good friends. But we haven't seen each other for a long time.”
“How come?”
“Well,” I sigh. I wish I knew the answer to that. “Both of us said some things we didn't mean, and our lives kind of took us in different directions.”
“But you like my mom?”
It’s true what they say about children. Innocent questions that aren’t so innocent or simple at all.
“What do you mean, buddy?”
“You like her? Don't you? Are you still friends?”
“Of course.”
It isn’t exactly true. But it isn’t exactly a lie either.
Had we stayed together, things would be so different now. And I'd be lying if I said I don’t still have feelings for her even after learning the truth of what she did and what she kept from me.
“Your mom and I are good friends, and I like her a lot.”
“Me too.” He smiles up at me.
It does beg the question, though…
“Does your mom have any other friends who are boys?”
Maybe it's not an appropriate question to be asking a five-year-old, but I suddenly find myself very concerned about whether or not she's dating anyone.
He shrugs and returns his focus to the game. “Not really. Just Mister Aaron.”
Mister Aaron…
I sure as hell hope he’s just her boss and not also a boyfriend. I'm not sure where all this jealousy suddenly came from, but knowing another man is spending time with her and maybe my son has some sort of animalistic instinct rearing up inside me.
“She's single.”
I jerk my head up and turn toward the sound of Jolynn's voice. I hadn't even noticed she woke. She grins at Max on my lap and me.
He smiles up at her. “Hi, Grandma.”
She comes and sits next to me and pats my arm. “She hasn't dated.”
I turn and look at her. She can't mean what I think she does. “What do you mean, she hasn't dated? Since when?”
She nods toward Max. “Since you.”
“You're kidding.”
There’s no way an intelligent, beautiful woman like Penelope has been single this entire time. Even with a kid, she had to have been asked out. Been attracted to other people.
She's a fucking catch.
Jolynn shakes her head.
Wow.
I've had a few semi-serious relationships over the last couple of years, but nothing I would consider worth mentioning. They were great women who I had a good time with, but none of them filled the void in my heart that had been left by the dark-haired girl on the beach.
Maybe she wanted to protect Max by not dating.
“Because of Max?”
Jolynn shakes her head with a knowing glint in her eyes. She was always so welcoming to me, even though I knew she and Pen's father weren’t exactly happy about her hooking up with me.
They were the kind of parents I always wished I had, though. Supportive even when their children may have done something stupid or not what they would've wanted.
She clicks her tongue. “For a guy with a fancy degree and a perfect pedigree, you sure can be dense.”
I chuckle. “How so?”
She laughs and glances over at Penelope sleeping. “She didn't date anybody because deep down, she hoped you’d come back.”
“But…she ended things with me. She walked away.”
Jolynn shrugs and offers me a kind smile. “That may have been what her head made her do, but her heart has always belonged to you, Artemis, even after all these years and everything that happened between you two.”
I swallow the lump in my throat and shake my head.
No. It can't be true.
She can't possibly still have feelings for me after all this time. Not after the way she reacted when she saw me. Not if she really believes I could take Max away from her. She can't possibly still be in love with me.
Can she?
Chapter 10
PENELOPE
I’m definitely not waking up to a Christmas miracle, just my little miracle. Small hands cup my face, and Max's chocolate-scented breath assaults my senses.
“Momma, you awake?”
I open my eyes slowly. His little face is right in front of me. Chocolate covers his mouth, and he grins.
“Max, did you eat more chocolate?”
Someone gave in to his pleas. One guess who it was.
Max giggles and presses his hand over his mouth. “Just a little, Momma.”
He holds his forefinger and thumb together to show me how much.
At least he's honest.
I hug him close and push myself up into a sitting position, my back protesting the motion.
Dang. When did I get so old?
I can't wait to have a good long bath and a soft bed. Preferably at Mom and Dad’s house, with Max in the room right next to me. I search the terminal. Mom naps in the chair across from me, and Artemis sits to my right.
He offers me an apologetic smile. “Sorry, he's been wanting to wake you for the last half hour. I just couldn't tell him no again.”
