The Deadliest Sin Series Complete Collection, page 125
I take a sip of my vodka and lean back in my chair, watching her sleep.
Peaceful.
Relaxed.
Content.
I can’t even remember the last time I slept like that—maybe not ever. Certainly not in the last few years with all the unrest. And given the uncertainty still lingering, a good night’s sleep doesn’t seem like it will come anytime soon.
And if I leave Julia on the couch all night, she’ll wake up even more sore than she already will be. I need to get her back home—wherever that is.
I down the rest of my drink, snuff out my cigar, and push to my feet. Even after already coming so hard inside her, my body craves more. Being with this woman was the first time I’ve felt any sort of relief from the tension and stress that’s weighed down on me recently. And I want more of it. More of her. No matter how dangerous it might be to get involved with her right now.
Dangerous.
Stupid.
Self-destructive.
All those and then some.
I slowly walk over to the couch and squat next to it, brushing her blond locks back from her face. The soft, silky texture juxtaposed with my rough fingers is a strong reminder of how different we are, of how wrong this is.
Chto ya delayu?
Being a selfish bastard…
I refuse to let her go. She won’t walk away like she did the other night. Not now. Not ever. Not again.
A soft knock comes from the door, and Dmitri pushes in. His eyes dart from her curled up on the couch to me.
“I told you I wasn't to be interrupted.”
He raises his hand in apology. “I'm sorry, pakhan, but we need to talk.”
This better be fucking good.
Reluctantly, I follow him into the hallway lined with the variously themed private playrooms, pulling the door to my office closed behind me so we don’t disrupt the beautiful woman passed out on my couch.
He glances up and down it to ensure we're alone. “One of Galen’s shipments was just hit again.”
“What?”
“A caravan of trucks coming from the docks.”
“Was he with it?”
Dmitri shakes his head. “No, but it seems like it was a bit of a bloodbath. And they took two trucks worth of weapons. He called, looking for you, but I told them you were indisposed.”
He glances toward the office, and I scrub a hand over my face, the smell of her cunt still on my skin, making my cock twitch again.
“Did he say who it was?”
“No.” Dmitri shakes his head. “He's not certain, but he thinks it was the Luna Cartel. It was their M.O.”
“How the fuck can it be Luna? They don’t have anyone left after what we did in that warehouse.”
Dmitri shrugs. “Perhaps more men came up from Mexico? We’re still trying to figure out where the bomb came from, could be one of their guys south of the border. If it was their leader who got away that night, they might be rebuilding to seek revenge for the warehouse attack.”
Revenge.
“Then they'll be coming for us, too.”
Just what I fucking need.
Genti will have run straight back to Kat to tell her what we did to him, which means she’s going to have a stick up her ass even more and want to come at me. Coupled with the hit squad running around town, that’s enough of a threat. The Luna Cartel after me because I helped Galen means fighting on three fronts at the same time.
Splitting resources and trying to keep our eyes in so many different directions means things could slip through the cracks, things that could very well be deadly to me and anyone close to me.
Including the woman in my office.
“Okay.” I scrub my hands over my face again and sigh. “Make sure she gets home safely. I have to talk to Galen in person so we can try to formulate a plan.” I start to walk away, then turn back. “But leave a man on her.”
“Pakhan?” He raises an eyebrow in question. “Why?”
I stare at the closed door in my office. “She’s a target now. I want someone on her twenty-four-seven, and I need to know everything about that woman. Where she goes. Who she talks to. What she eats. Where she shops. Everything she does.” I lock my gaze with his. “I don't want eyes off her for even a moment, do you understand?”
He nods sharply. “Da, pakhan.”
“And make sure she doesn’t know she’s being watched.”
After what I just did to her, I’m the last person she’s going to want to see, and if she finds out I have someone assigned to keep tabs on her, she isn’t the type of girl to appreciate it.
I have to deal with this Galen situation and get my head screwed back on properly because that woman has thrown me completely off my game.
A fucking virgin…
This isn’t the time to have my mind wrapped up in that woman and what I did. If I’m not focused, I’ll pay for it—likely painfully.
JULIA
Even two days later, my body still aches from my night at the club with Valerian. My mind keeps dragging me back there, too—to that time, that space, to his touch, the feel of his lips and hands on me, his cock driving into me relentlessly.
I clench my legs together against the throb I've had to self-relieve so many times already that it's almost embarrassing. The lingering hints of pain and the red welts still on my body can't deter me from wanting more, from wanting it again, from wanting him despite all the reasons it’s a horrible idea to ever go back, to have ever gone there in the first place.
But I’ve never felt that like, never acted like that—so needy, so wanton. It felt…powerful knowing that even though I was restrained, I was also in control and could stop him at any time.
Maybe that was his intent all along when he said he was giving me what I said I wanted. He saw I had no control over my life, and he gave it to me where I could have it.
It would have been perfect had I not let him see all of me, even the scars that no one else ever has—the ones I’ve kept well hidden. They didn’t scare him away, didn’t send him running. They only seemed to draw him closer, make him more possessive, more determined.
And now, after everything that happened that night, I have to watch my back even more. I have to be sure I'm always aware because this is when things get really dangerous. The time is coming when there will be no more hiding behind fake names and dyed hair, when all the cards will be on the table and the past will rear its ugly head to potentially destroy everything I’ve worked for.
That can’t happen.
I slip into the black jeans and off-the-shoulder sweater and glance at my watch. If I'm going to make my meeting, I need to leave now. I hustle through the living room, grab my purse off the counter, and step out of the condo, throwing the lock behind me.
This place has never felt like home; it's a temporary answer to a problem. A place for me to rest my head even though I barely sleep anymore. The nightmares and the visions of everything I still need to accomplish constantly combine to make me restless. The other night only exacerbated my nerves. Too many pieces are in play, too many things can go wrong. But despite this not being my home, every time I leave it, a knot forms in my stomach. It might not be home, but it provides some modicum of safety.
No matter how false it might be.
Out here, in this city, in this world, anything can happen.
It’s a harsh lesson I learned at a very young age. Something that has served me well to remember every day of the life that has become so complicated that I don’t know what direction it’s going.
I certainly never expected it to lead me to a place where I’d be in the arms of Valerian Kamenev. Where I’d be facing down danger in a man built like a linebacker who fucks like a god.
Or at least, I think he did.
Without anything to compare it to, I don’t really have a frame of reference. I just know it definitely wasn’t how I saw my first time being when I imagined it over the years. He wasn’t the kind of man I saw giving myself to. And not like that. This life wasn’t anything I ever could have created in my own head.
Until that day changed everything…
Until I woke up in that hospital bed, torn apart, in agony.
Until all the uncertainties and lies ripped me in two.
Until I had to become something else.
And this meeting is just another necessary step to bring my plans to fruition.
I make my way down the stairs and out the front door onto the street. The crisp fall air the city is named for whirls around me, sending my hair flying in my face.
Tires squeal on the road to my left, and I turn toward the sound, brushing the blond strands out of my eyes as a set of strong arms grabs me and drags me backward across the sidewalk.
No. No. No!
I try to kick at the man’s shins and scratch at any exposed skin, anything to get the assailant off me, but he wrestles me easily into the back of the vehicle waiting at the curb. He pushes me against the leather seat, pinning me down, keeping me prone as we tear away from the curb with more squealing tires that seem to be sealing my fate.
This is what they warned me about, what they always tried to keep me insulated from. I’ve become a target, and now, our enemies have found what they’ve been searching for—a bargaining chip.
They’ll take me and use me any way they can to get what they want.
Over my dead fucking body.
I’ve worked too hard for too long and suffered too much to be used as a pawn in the game these people play. I refuse to lose control again. The weight on me makes it almost impossible to move, but I twist until one of my eyes sees flesh. I shift my head and bite down as hard as I can.
“Fuck.”
The familiar voice fills the space, and I freeze as he jerks his hand back. I lift my head and shove the hair from my eyes again. Valerian’s gaze meets mine. Ice cold. He shakes his hand out, my teeth marks still in the fleshy part of his palm. But despite the pain I must have caused him, a smirk slowly spreads across his face. A look of amusement breaking that ice-cold gaze.
“Very good, Julia.” He inclines his head toward me. “Though, letting yourself get dragged into a vehicle wasn't very smart.”
I lash out at him with my foot, landing the kick squarely against his shin.
“Fuck.” He curses and rubs at it. “That hurt, kotyonok.”
My chest heaves with my anger, my fists at my sides, ready to lash out at him again. “What the hell are you thinking? Snatching me off the street like that?”
He releases a heavy sigh and leans back across the plush leather seats, any discomfort I may have caused him easily forgotten. “I didn't think you would come if I invited you.”
“You’re probably right. Especially after a move like that.”
I huff and cross my arms over my chest, but it only earns a grin from him.
His tongue darts out across his lower lip. “I'm going to quite enjoy this.”
“Enjoy what? Having me kick you in the balls the next time?”
His eyes heat, the ice melting away instantly. The flame of lust that matches what was there the other night taking over. “Taking you out to dinner and then back to my place.”
I scoff and shake my head. “You think I'm going to go to dinner with you or let you touch me again after you just kidnapped me off the street?”
His grin only spreads. “You think you have any choice?”
VALERIAN
Julia glares at me from across the table as the waitress sets our meals in front of us.
I smile at the redheaded woman who has served me for years and incline my head. “Thank you.”
She returns my smile and glances between Julia and me, her gaze lingering on my date a bit longer than is comfortable. It’s rare that I’m here with anyone other than Dmitri or one of the other guys, so her interest in my companion is warranted.
“Is there anything else I can get you?”
“We’re good.” I shake my head. “Just some privacy, please.”
With a little half-bow, she backs away, understanding exactly what I mean. That's the entire reason I requested this table in the back corner of Kachka, one of my favorite restaurants in my territory. No one questions me here, and they know to keep their mouths shut about anything they see or hear.
I return my focus to Julia, who hasn’t spoken a word since we arrived. “Are you going to give me the silent treatment all evening?”
Julia’s lips twist slightly as she looks down at her plate.
“I ordered pelmeni for you since you didn't want to make your own choice. I think you'll enjoy it. Kind of like Russian ravioli.”
She leans forward and sniffs at the bowl doubtfully, unwilling to wipe the scowl from her beautiful lips.
“You know, your anger isn't going to deter me, kotyonok.” I lean slightly closer to her and drop my voice. “It's only going to get my cock even harder.”
A pink flush quickly spreads across her cheeks, and she shifts uneasily in her seat, glancing around us to ensure no one can hear me.
“It's quite private back here, Julia. I assure you—we can speak freely.”
“You want me to speak freely?” Her eyebrows rise. “Because I don't think you're going to like what I have to say.”
I chuckle and take a bite of my shashlik. Kachka has the best marinade, and the flavors practically dance in my mouth, bringing memories of home I usually struggle to keep buried. Swallowing, I wash it down with a sip of wine. “I very much would love to know what goes on in that head of yours, Julia. So, please, fill me in.”
She gives me a tight smile. “I think you're used to getting everything you want and don’t care how you get it. You could have just, oh, I don't know, asked me out to dinner. But instead, you snatched me off the street like a common criminal.”
My barked laugh draws the attention of the waitress near the kitchen door, but I wave her off as she tries to approach and lean against the table, resting my elbow. “I have a surprise for you, Julia. In case you haven't noticed, I am a criminal.”
Annoyance flashes in her bourbon eyes, and she presses her lips together in a firm line. “Well, yes, of course, you are, but—”
“But what?”
“But you didn't have to do that.”
I take another sip of my wine and turn the glass in my fingers, watching the liquid spin inside as I consider her words. “I was worried that after the other night, you wouldn't want to see me again.”
At her silence, I chance a glance up at her, to find her staring at me with wide eyes.
“Why?”
“Because of how I treated you.”
“How you treated me?” Her brow furrows. “I'm not quite following you.”
It appears she’s going to make me say it, spell it out for her in words that leave no room for misunderstandings, no matter how uncomfortable the topic may be.
“If I had known you were…” I don't finish the sentence—the word feeling almost sacrilegious to speak under the circumstances. “I wouldn't have done what I did.”
Her flush darkens even more. She squirms again, the topic of conversation as unpleasant for her as it is for me. “I’m an adult, Valerian. Not a child you have to try to protect.”
“You're partially right. You're certainly not a child. Definitely all woman.” The memory of her cunt clasping around my cock, her gasps and moans of pleasure, the way she begged for it, all fill my head. “But you're young and naïve. And you believe you're invincible. That nothing and no one can harm you. You couldn't be more wrong, kotyonok.”
She considers my words and the several layers of meaning within them. Then, instead of responding, she takes her first bite from the meal I ordered for her.
Her eyes widen slightly, and her little moan of approval makes my cock harden. “This is good.”
“I told you I would never do anything that isn't good for you.”
She snorts, the sound so un-lady-like that it makes me grin. “I can tell you right now that snatching me off the street isn't good for me.”
“Did you have somewhere else to be? Another date, perhaps?”
Even saying the words makes my hand fist around the knife I had raised to cut my next bite. This type of possessiveness has never overtaken me before. I’ve never cared about the women I’ve fucked, never given a shit who or what else they do when we aren’t together, but it’s different with the young woman sitting across from me.
It has been from the first second she stepped into Gluttony.
Her gaze zeroes in on my grip on the knife. “No. Nothing like that. Just an appointment I needed to keep.”
“Well…” I relax slightly, cutting a piece of meat with a little more force than necessary. “My apologies. I'm happy to pay for any fee you incur due to my actions.”
She drums her nails on the table, and my eyes drift to her exposed shoulder blade peeking out from the loose gray sweater.
“Did I tell you that you look beautiful tonight?”
“No, you didn't.”
“Takoy zhenshchine kak ty nuzhno keazhdyy den’ govorit’ kak ona prekrasna.”
Her lips twist in confusion. “What does that mean?”
I grin at her. “If I told you, that would ruin the fun.”
She offers me a saccharine sweet fake smile. “Tienes razón. Eso arruinaría la diversión. Cómo yo podría decirte que eres un imbécil arrogante y tú ni lo sabrías.”
“Touché, kotyonok.”
We both dig into our meals, Julia clearly enjoying what I’ve chosen for her.
“I grew up on those, you know. Ate them almost every day.”
“Really?” Her eyebrows rise. “Did you grow up in Russia?”
Her question takes me slightly off guard, my back stiffening. It isn't something I talk about with anyone. And I hadn't expected her to ask anything so personal, especially after the fury she’s thrown at me since I pulled her into the car.
