The Dover Cafe Under Fire, page 4
Nellie bit back an angry retort. ‘Don’t you have any friends in Folkestone who could help?’ she asked.
Hester raised one eyebrow – though it had been plucked so thin it was almost invisible. ‘Considerin’ most of the people I know are men and most of them have gawn to war, and those that are there live with their wives . . . You really think I’d be welcome in one of their houses?’
‘There must be someone – maybe that fella you mentioned?’
Hester laughed bitterly. ‘That bastard! No way. He turned out to be no good. As for the others, I tried, Nell. All those men as have been made welcome in my house . . . Not one was willing to help. A woman like me don’t make too many friends on her journey through life.’
‘What about your son? Can he help?’
Hester stared at Nellie wordlessly, her lips trembling as a single tear rolled down her cheek.
Nellie got up and put an arm around Hester’s shoulders. ‘Oh Hester, love. I’m so sorry.’
Hester shook her head. ‘Not your fault, Nell. It’s this bastard war and the people in charge – they’re all murderers. Hitler, Churchill, the lot of them. They’re the ones that killed my boy. Out somewhere in the Atlantic, trapped in a bloody tin can miles under the sea; I feel sick when I think about it.’
‘When did this happen?’
‘I got word not long after I saw you. My Tommy . . . he were the very best of me. The only good thing in me life.’ Her shoulders shook as Nellie pressed her tightly to her, rocking her back and forth as she might a child.
‘You’re a good thing in your life, Hester. Me and Marianne won’t ever forget what you did for Don and I’m not the sort to go back on my promises. You’re welcome to stay as long as you need.’
Hester fished in her pocket, pulling out a grubby handkerchief and blowing her nose. ‘Thanks, Nell. I’m not normally like this. I’ve had months to come to terms with it. But sometimes it just hits me like a bus and I turn into a blinking watering pot.’
‘I understand, love.’
Hester regarded her through watery eyes. ‘I don’t think you do. And I pray to God that you never will.’
Nellie smiled sadly. ‘As do I. Come on, let’s find you something to wear.’
Hester sniffed and smiled bravely. ‘Thanks, Nell. I always said you were a good ’un.’
Shame washed through Nellie; when she’d first caught sight of Hester, she’d been dismayed. But what gave her the right to judge? After all, she was hardly a saint. Six children from two fathers, and her poor husband dead after . . . Instinctively her eyes turned towards the wall beside the fireplace, before she quickly looked away and stood up, holding a hand down for Hester and heaving her to her feet.
‘All I ask is that you don’t tell anyone what you’ve been up to,’ she said. ‘And if you could make up some story about a dead husband, then it’ll make all our lives easier.’
Hester raised her eyebrows. ‘You really think people’ll believe some cock and bull about me being a respectable widow?’
‘Why wouldn’t they?’ Although maybe Hester had a point. Nellie had noticed Lou Carter with her nose pressed up against the café window as Hester had come in and given the Carter family’s nefarious connections, she wouldn’t be surprised if Lou was well aware of what her old friend had been doing. And Lou’s mouth was as wide as the Channel, so she couldn’t see her keeping quiet for long.
‘Look at it this way, then,’ Nellie replied. ‘If any men know you they’ll keep their mouths shut and the women won’t have a clue – we’re always the last to know,’ she said bitterly, thinking about the sudden appearance of Donald’s son in Dover earlier that year. Born on the same day as her son Jimmy, and she’d never suspected a thing.
‘Maybe.’ Hester didn’t sound convinced.
‘Why don’t we say you were singing in a pub somewhere when your house got bombed, which is why you’re wearing these clothes.’
Hester laughed. ‘You ever heard my voice?’
‘Don’t matter. Long as you don’t sing in front of anyone.’
‘All right, you’re the boss. But don’t blame me if people start talking.’ She nudged Nellie. ‘Hey, can’t wait to see that bastard Horace Smith’s face when he clocks me in the café.’
‘If only! But his house got wrecked and he’s long gone. And good riddance, the disgusting hypocrite. Constantly going on at Marianne for being an unmarried mother – although she ain’t unmarried anymore. She got wed to Alfie who’s in my Jim and Bert’s regiment up at Drop Redoubt. They brought him home on leave last Christmas, and what a gift he turned out to be.’
‘Ah. I’m right pleased for her. Funny how people change, though, in’t it? Horace were such a one for the girls back then. Wonder what happened to change him?’
Nellie snorted. ‘I don’t reckon he changed a bit. He just likes to pretend he’s all about Christian charity now.’
‘Yeah, you’re probably right. You’d be surprised how many religious types ended up at my house. There’s something about carnal sin that gets ’em all excited.’
Nellie frowned. ‘Spare me the details, if you don’t mind. Now, wait here, I’ll get you some proper clothes. Might be a bit loose around the middle and a bit short in the leg, but they’ll do for now.
‘A bit?!’ Hester said with a smirk.
Nellie pursed her lips in annoyance. ‘Do you want some clothes or not?’
Hester held up her hands. ‘Just jokin’, Nell. No offence.’
Nellie marched into her bedroom and returned with a red and purple skirt and a blue and red checked jersey.
Hester baulked at the sight of them. ‘You’ve got to be jokin’. Haven’t you got something a little less . . . colourful?’
‘I have, but I thought these might make you feel more cheerful,’ Nellie huffed as she went back into the bedroom, returning shortly with a blue skirt and a grey jersey, bobbled with age.
Hester grimaced. ‘What’s with all the colours anyway?’
‘I like ’em. And so did Jasper—’ She stopped, realising Hester wouldn’t know what had happened to Jasper.
‘Jasper Cane? He ain’t dead, is he?’ Hester said. ‘He’s a true gent, that one. Did you know he gave me money to help me leave?’
Nellie shook her head, though she wasn’t surprised. That was Jasper all over. ‘He’s not dead. Just . . . He’s just . . .’ But she couldn’t say any more, she was trying very hard not to think about the awful truth of his condition. ‘He’s been sick and he’s in hospital,’ she said finally. ‘But he’ll be out soon. Now go and get changed.’ She pushed Hester towards her room, then dropped on to the flowered sofa with a heavy sigh, wondering how much trouble a woman like Hester could cause. But how could she turn her away? To lose a son . . . She shuddered. There could be no worse grief than that. She made a promise to herself that she would do everything in her power to help Hester get back on her feet.
She’d been sitting there less than a minute when there was a loud crash. Seconds later, the air raid siren started to wail and she let out a hefty sigh. Chances were that this time it wasn’t a false alarm, so they should probably get to shelter. She stood up just as her bedroom door burst open and Hester ran out holding the fur coat up in front of her, one strap of her negligee hanging down her arm. ‘You got a shelter, Nell?’
‘Downstairs in the basement. But don’t you want to get some clothes on first?’
Hester shook her head. ‘I ain’t waitin’ for nothing!’ she shrieked. ‘Not after me house nearly collapsed on top of me.’ Shrugging on her coat, she ran towards the stairs, as another loud boom made the building shake.
Nellie followed her with a frown. It looked like Hester’s introduction to the market square community was going to come sooner than she’d expected.
Chapter 6
Lily walked quietly up to Jasper’s bed. He was lying facing the wall, his white hair almost the same shade as the pillow.
‘Are you awake?’ she whispered, leaning down to smooth his hair back from his face.
Jasper turned his head and looked at her. ‘Lily?’
Her heart jumped. ‘Can you see me?’
He shook his head. ‘I’d know your voice anywhere,’ he said, reaching his hand up to stroke her cheek.
‘Are you sure you can’t see me?’
‘I wish I could. I’d do anythin’ to see your lovely face again.’
She grabbed the hand that still rested on her cheek. ‘But you found my face immediately, almost as though you could see it.’
‘Did I?’ He looked confused.
‘Can you see anything at all?’
‘I don’t think so.’ He squeezed his eyes shut, then opened them again. ‘Nope,’ he sighed. ‘Nothing. But hospitals are drab old places, maybe what I need’s a bit of colour to perk me eyes up.’
‘Good thing Mum’s coming in later then,’ she said.
Jasper puffed out his cheeks. ‘Lily, love . . . Did your mum tell you about . . . ?’
Lily hesitated. On the one hand, she was relieved he remembered that he was her father. On the other, she hadn’t intended to talk to him about this until he was stronger.
‘About you being my dad?’ she said softly. ‘No, she didn’t tell me. I found out from that awful Dick, Dad’s – I mean, Donald’s – abandoned son. You shouldn’t have lied to me all these years. And neither should Mum.’
Jasper sighed. ‘I’m so sorry, love. You’ll never know how sorry. All them wasted years.’
‘They weren’t wasted. You were always there. And I always loved you.’
‘And now? Can you ever forgive me?’ he asked.
‘I won’t lie, I was angry with you. Both of you. But life’s too short to waste in anger, so of course I forgive you. And I love you as much, if not more, as I always have.’
He smiled. ‘Not as much as I love you. Oh, how I wish I could see your face.’
‘Hopefully you will. If what Dr Toland suspects is right. That’s why I’m here. She’s asked Charlie to come and see you, because he specialised in brain injuries when he was training.’
‘You reckon your doctor officer can make a blind man see?’ Jasper snorted. ‘He might be clever, but he’s not flippin’ Jesus! And anyway, there’s nothing wrong with me brain!’ Jasper said indignantly.
Lily chuckled and kissed his cheek. ‘I know. But let him have a look, eh?’
‘Don’t see I have much choice, do I?’
There was a boom and for a moment the lights in the ward flickered. Lily sighed. ‘Here we go again.’
As the muffled screech of the siren reached them, Jasper hit the bed in frustration. ‘I should be out there helpin’, dammit. Not lyin’ here like a sack of rotten spuds.’
‘Hey, stop it.’ Lily grasped his hand. ‘You’ve done your share of helping. And now it’s our turn to help you. And hopefully one day soon you’ll be back out there, ordering everyone around.’ Lily looked towards the door. ‘And looks like Charlie’s arrived just in time to miss the raid.’
She beckoned Charlie over, her heart skipping a beat as she watched him lope towards her, his dark hair slicked back from his forehead and his brown eyes sparkling at the sight of her. I should never have turned him down, she thought for the millionth time. Just seeing him made her happy, and the fact that he was still willing to help her despite her rejection showed her more than words ever could what a wonderful man he was.
‘Good morning, Mr Cane,’ Charlie said when he reached the bed, his eyes sharp as he assessed Jasper’s eye movements.
‘Mornin’, lad,’ Jasper grumped. ‘Lily seems to think you can work some sort of miracle on me.’
Lily tutted. ‘No need to be rude, Dad. Just give him a chance.’
Jasper went still at her words. ‘Say that again,’ he said finally, reaching for her hand and holding it tightly.
‘I said there’s no need to be rude.’
‘And the rest.’
Lily looked at Charlie who nodded at her encouragingly. ‘Dad,’ she whispered.
Jasper grinned. ‘How can I refuse when my daughter asks me so nicely. Do your worst, Doc.’
Lily watched quietly while Charlie carried out a thorough examination, impressed at the gentle way he handled Jasper, building his trust and putting him at ease.
Finally, he sat back. ‘Mr Cane, you were in the last war, weren’t you?’
Jasper nodded.
‘I imagine you saw a few of your comrades get injured or die.’
Jasper nodded again.
‘And quite a few were blinded in the conflict, I understand.’
‘Plenty,’ Jasper croaked. ‘Some were truly blind and others were— Hang on, are you suggestin’ I’m faking? Listen, Doctor whatever-your-name-is, I’m not that sort of man! I keep going no matter what. Those lads . . . those lads who pretended, I never blamed ’em. Never. War does crazy things to all of us.’
‘Most of those lads weren’t faking, Mr Cane,’ Charlie said gently. ‘They were so shocked and in such distress that their minds played tricks on them.’
‘And you think that’s what’s happened to me?’ Jasper was astounded. ‘Are you telling me my sight will come back?’ He sat up straight, reaching towards Charlie and grabbing his lapels.
Charlie took hold of Jasper’s wrists and pushed them back. ‘I do think that’s what’s happened to you. You just grabbed me as though you could see me, and that tells me a lot. Dr Toland is thinking along the same lines. She just wanted to get a second opinion. I think – and please bear in mind this is almost impossible to confirm – but I think you might be suffering from what is known as “hysterical blindness”.’
‘What?!’
Jasper’s shout made Lily jump. She’d expected him to be delighted at this news. She’d anticipated relief and excitement. But instead Jasper looked angrier than she’d ever seen him.
‘I’ve never been hysterical in me life! Not during gas attacks in the trenches. Not when I picked up Donald from no-man’s-land where he were lying screamin’ an’ shakin while the shells burst around him. Not when I was digging poor Daisy out of the rubble—’ Jasper’s chest was heaving.
Lily looked at Charlie in alarm. Jasper was always so calm and good-humoured; in fact, she didn’t think she’d ever seen him lose his temper like this.
‘Mr Cane . . .’ Charlie began, putting his hand over Jasper’s.
Jasper shook it off. ‘Just go,’ he hissed. ‘And don’t come back. And be thankful I can’t see ya, or you’d not be stood there right now. You’d be flat on your back with a busted nose.’
‘Dad!’ Lily gasped. ‘Charlie’s only trying to explain what he thinks might be wrong—’
‘No one tells me I’m hysterical and gets away with it,’ Jasper gritted out. ‘No one.’
Lily stood up. ‘I’ll deal with you later!’ she said sternly to Jasper, then taking Charlie by the arm, she led him back through the ward and upstairs towards the entrance.
‘I thought you said he was good-natured,’ he said wryly.
‘He is,’ she replied. But at Charlie’s raised eyebrow, she conceded, ‘Usually. Maybe we should have waited. But with you leaving soon, I thought . . .’ She shook her head. ‘Do you really think he’ll be able to see again?’
‘I wish I could be certain. All I can go on are the few patients I’ve seen and the cases I’ve studied. This feels like a classic case of hysterical blindness.’
Lily huffed out a laugh. ‘Please don’t call it that.’ She thought about what Jasper had said. ‘I never knew that, though.’
‘What?’
‘That he saved Donald’s life. He’s never talked about the war before. He always said it was best forgotten.’
‘Sometimes these things are best faced. Jasper’s been through so many traumas in his life, maybe what happened a few months ago was the straw that broke the camel’s back. He’ll need some time to digest what I’ve said.’
‘But how can we help him recover?’
‘Mostly encourage and reassure him. His eyes seem to be working normally, but for some reason his brain isn’t picking up the images. Look at the way he grabbed my lapel. He could see it, but he wasn’t aware of it. He needs to be convinced that his eyes work.’
‘So what can we do?’
‘I’ll speak to Dr Toland about bandaging his eyes for a couple of weeks. Retinal rest sometimes helps. But mostly it’s a case of Jasper needing to believe it. It’s his decision in some ways, though it’s not one he can make consciously. I just wish I was able to stick around and keep an eye on his progress.’
They were standing at the entrance now and the all-clear was ringing out across the town. Charlie shrugged on his coat and opened the door, shivering as a blast of icy air nearly blew his cap off.
‘I’m sorry,’ Lily said quietly, pulling her navy-blue cardigan more tightly around her.
Charlie paused and looked down at her, confused. ‘What for?’
‘Saying no.’
He shrugged slightly.
‘Don’t you care?’ she asked, suddenly aggrieved that he seemed to be taking her rejection so calmly. ‘Sometimes I wonder whether you were expecting me to turn you down. Perhaps you wanted me to.’
‘Of course I care. I love you, Lily. I want you to be my wife, but you said no, and I can either walk away and never see you again, or I can spend as much time as I can with you and hope I can convince you to change your mind.’
Lily searched his face. Would he really wait for her? Or would his head be turned the minute he was away? ‘Do you mean that?’
He pulled her into his arms. ‘Yes, I mean that. You’ve broken my heart, but I still want to be with you. So I’ll cling on till the very last minute, and maybe . . . maybe you’ll relent.’ He patted his pocket. ‘The ring’s still here, you know. So if you’d like to reconsider, I’ll happily slip it on your finger right now.’ He kissed her forehead.
Lily went still. It would be so easy to say yes and forget about all her other plans.
