Healthy Progress, page 26
“I wouldn’t be the first time,” Onas drawled.
Okay then. I wasn’t even going to get into that.
We went over the rest of it, and everyone had their job for the next one.
Which took us less than five minutes to completely handle. Completely. They opened portals and carried everything with magic, setting it down in a much more organized way and just… Done and done.
Wow.
And all I had to do was find any hidden safes since my magic was so good at locating—and breaking—metal. Nice. That got us back on track fast. I blinked and we had a page of the list done.
Three in Rio.
One in Sao Paulo.
Six in Montevideo.
Three in Buenos Aires.
Two in Caracas, Aruba, and Barbados each.
Eight in Bogotá, but they were smaller. Still, weird.
One big one in Lima.
Two in Santiago.
And that got us caught up to the timeline we’d been hoping for. Like dayumn. We took care of South America before the places on the East Coast we’d plotted really got busy. That meant it was better for us to get in and out cleanly.
Then it was NYC, Philadelphia, Jacksonville, Charlotte, Washington DC, Boston, Baltimore, Atlanta, Miami, Raleigh, Virginia Beach, Orlando, Newark, Jersey City, Norfolk, and many more. They all had at least two or three, NYC taking the prize of fifteen including the surrounding areas.
Yikes.
By then it was more than we could manage and make sense of. They asked me to stay with Captain Dalyor and a bunch of his friends they would swear to secrecy and manage the warehouse. Shael asked for food as well, and I was much better at knowing where to go when and getting the good stuff.
“Sure,” I immediately agreed, smirking when I got a range of looks. “See how easy it is when you use your words and just talk to me? No judgment, no bullshit, just lovely logic and the best plan for what we need.”
“I’m converted,” Commander Morgan chuckled, holding his hands up in surrender. “Especially because you always get the best fries. I never understood how they were so good when they’re just fried potatoes, but they’ve gotten better topped with everything good.”
It was amusing when several of them agreed, their love of fast food making them not such jerks.
They handled the other fairies for a break, and I went with Lageos to get gobs of food. We made sure it was all easy to eat while walking or thieving, so mostly big burritos and sandwiches. Onas actually had an endearing addiction to pop, so I made sure we got lots of that too.
“I just got a text from Neldor whining we’re ‘playing’ without him and he wants in on the fun,” Darby told me when we got back.
“I’m not sure what he could do besides sit here.”
He shrugged. “Then let him. You had a rough time when it was you, and he said he’s slept so much he’s not tired.”
Fair enough. We grabbed some chairs from the main address of HAVEN and some tables to help with the chaos. Then I grabbed Neldor and Commander Talila who was guarding him. She disapproved of most things, but she kept her mouth shut when she learned what was going on.
Neldor did not, loving the plan and how much we’d already collected. I thought he was going to die of laughter when he found out they were leaving Batman signs like I had.
“You are so damn adorable it drives me nuts sometimes,” he said as he reached for a sandwich. “Really, life is boring without you, and I can’t even imagine it anymore.”
I wasn’t the only one who blinked at him in shock.
He seemed to realize the change in mood and shrugged. “People know now. I don’t have to curb what I say or worry if I praise or flirt with you.”
“I’ll still pound you if you go over the line and upset her,” Lageos warned.
Neldor took the warning seriously. Lageos had cracked him enough times that he’d be an idiot not to take the warning seriously.
We got back to work, and every half an hour I’d go with Dalyor to grab some more food from somewhere… Mostly for Neldor. Again, I didn’t judge or mock, remembering how hungry I’d constantly been after getting my wings in.
At some point I fell asleep because I woke leaning over one of the tables. I smothered a chuckle when Darby and Neldor were in the same uncomfortable positions. Rubbing my eyes, I looked around to see what I had missed.
“Young princesses should go back to bed,” Rafe teased me quietly from the next table over.
“Fuck my back hurts,” I grumbled, realizing I had a blanket over me. “Where?”
“Lageos grabbed some for all of you. I’m sure he’ll get you a pillow bed or fuck, teleport a sofa over.”
“Best idea ever,” I agreed, doing just that. I brought the huge sectional I had in my living room, scaring the shit out of Dalyor who had only been a few feet away. I apologized, and he moved Neldor while I did Darby.
Then I face-planted, promising I’d just be a bit.
Yeah right.
I woke when sunshine filled the warehouse and the smells of breakfast filled my nose.
“Thanks for the couch, agra,” Darby said as he squatted down by me and offered juice. “That would have been bad otherwise.”
I nodded and sat up with a yawn. “Yeah, my back didn’t like it.”
“I appreciate you too,” Neldor mumbled from a different part of the couch. “And I apologize for even thinking you were a baby about this. Everyone else made it look so easy around me, but now I get it was because they didn’t have them out much near me. This is fucking ridiculous and I’m tired of it.”
“Yeah, I was that grumpy too,” I chuckled. I thanked Darby and took the juice as I stood… And almost dropped it. “What the fuck? How long were we asleep?”
“A while,” Lageos chuckled from where he sat at a different table tucking into his breakfast. “It’s noon the next day. We’re taking a break before the next time zone to move to.”
I blinked around the almost completely full warehouse. “How? I mean…”
Shael snorted. “Yes, it added up quickly. I was shocked how many had crates of money. They put it in wood crates like it was goods for sale at a market. The fact they don’t use banks is just asking for someone to do what we did.”
“Banks have to report any deposits over ten thousand dollars and are heavily watched and regulated,” I muttered as I stared around at the crazy. “It’s why I was thinking of how to expand. Geiger says I’m absolutely going to be audited this tax season and we’ll handle it fine but yeah, time to figure out things better and under the table.”
I threw back my head and laughed. Fuck, we were doing it now. I had almost a warehouse full of funds. Awesome. Just awesome.
And they even got more. We stored some at the house and several other houses that had large party rooms. It was a huge score and took the pressure off me. Really took the pressure off of me. We had to come up with plans on how to spend it better without paper trails but yeah, this was a huge thing done.
Thank fuck.
24
After getting something handled so completely that had weighed on me, people noticed a difference in me. I was less anxious and didn’t feel like I would break anymore. I felt mentally healthier and stronger emotionally. I could handle what I needed to. A big part of it was conquering the dreams with Julian and weeks of him putting me first.
Also, Hudson pulling his head out of his ass and making sure I knew it had been him. I could be dismissive when he brought up things and I accepted that. I could be because I was so overwhelmed. We agreed we needed a better way to take a time out and hear each other because he wasn’t good at pushing and bringing things up again once shut down.
We were talking about counseling. I thought that was an issue for both of us and I wanted to work on it. Not just for Hudson, but for myself. I wanted to not shut down when I felt unheard or unseen. I deserved better.
I was worth better.
But with things getting better and feeling like I could balance better, I decided to handle something else that weighed on me.
Heavily.
And I hadn’t been able to talk about it like I needed to. I needed to be more honest with myself first and this time just take the leap that I knew what to do. I had everything in place and simply needed to pull the trigger.
No more stalling or pushing back what I needed.
Part of me had worried I was doing it for the wrong reasons and it would send a message I could be bullied but no, I didn’t allow myself to be bullied. I could take fair, constructive criticism. And I was done letting the bad stuff affect me when I knew the truth and how many people I’d helped.
It was maybe the hardest video I would ever record, but I had hope.
I needed to have hope.
Geiger was involved in the plans, and his support was what made me able to push through my own pain. It had taken a bit to get the rights to use the song I wanted, but after learning why we wanted it, they didn’t even charge us to use it which seemed like fate telling me this was the right thing to do.
I worked on the signs for a whole weekend, writing and rewriting what I wanted to say. Finally, I was happy.
Sunday night I set up the camera and loaded Nickelback’s “Lullaby” before sitting down with the signs. Taking a deep breath, I let it out slowly and hit play, holding up the first sign.
“When I was five, my foster dad shoved me and I fell down the stairs and I broke my leg. He was so mad that he had to take me to the hospital and pay for the emergency room, he beat me so badly when we got home that I know I should have gone back to the hospital. He left me alone to handle how to do anything with a cast on my leg so young.”
I dropped the first card after slowly reading the words in the mirror I had set up behind the camera. That was the only way I could think of how to time it right.
“That was my first memory, but it wasn’t the only abuse I suffered in foster care. When I was ten, the family who took me in used me like a nanny for their ‘real’ kids. I did everything for those three kids and a lot around the house. If I messed up, they wouldn’t feed me for days.”
“I had several families abuse me, one tossing me into their gross pond for fun or when I asked for anything. I had to run for my life at fifteen when my foster dad tried to rape me. He turned out to be a murderer. That’s who they allowed to take in young girls even after several went missing, presumed to have run away.”
“But I knew the drill. I was the problem. I was troubled. I was the liar when I told the social workers any of this. I got booted from homes after I told, and no one thought they would do that so they wouldn’t be investigated. It still astounds me how easily government workers would ignore what was right in front of them and always blame any of the kids they were in charge of.”
“They were supposed to protect us, and they constantly failed many of us. I barely survived and others haven’t, but people don’t care because we tax the system. Funny, because the same people who say that and blame children for the problems adults create are normally so-called ‘pro-life.’ Funny, because they didn’t care about my life.”
“So you only love a child until it’s born and then we’re on our own? We’re the problem and not you? We’re not the troubled ones. You are, and one day your hypocrisy will be judged.”
I let out a slow breath before dropping the card and moving on to the next.
“Many people have criticized me for not doing anything to help or not being an advocate for foster care reform after what I went through and have money. While I agree that I could do more, you don’t know me and have no right to judge me. You don’t know the hell I barely survived. I am a victim of the foster care system, and yelling at me to tell my story and relive what I still struggle with is cruel.”
“I can’t go back. I can’t go there and try to fight with lawmakers or social workers to do more. I can’t live in that fight and try to heal the damage done to me. Not when I’m still struggling so much with it. I can’t do that. I wish I could, but I would spiral and go back to the place I once was in where I worried I’d end my life to stop the pain.”
Tears fell as I dropped the card.
“I know the pain some of you are in. I’ve been there. I know how hard it is to worry the next place you’ll be sent to is even worse. I know how horrible other students and teachers treat you because you’re in foster care. I’ve lived that and the prejudice you’ve gone through. I can’t fix any of that. I’m just one person no matter how much money I have.”
“But hang on. I know it’s too hard and you’re struggling, but trust me when I say you can make it. You can survive too. Please don’t give up. I know how hard it is, but you can make it to eighteen and get free. It can seem like an eternity, but it’s not as long as you think. I promise. I promise it won’t always be this bad. It will be better.”
“I can’t change the system, but I want to help. I care about you. I believe you that it’s not you. I will listen to you unlike everyone else. I promise. I won’t leave you to be harmed by the monsters meant to take care of you. Someone will be in your corner now, I swear it.
“I have put a hundred private investigators on retainer across the US. If you are in foster care and you call this number, someone will listen and believe you. If you call and report you’re being abused, we will investigate and get the proof needed to get you out. I personally spoke to every investigator, and they were glad to take this on.”
“So hang on. Help is coming to get you out. We will believe you and help you. Please keep going and fight a bit longer. I can’t promise to fix everything or make the next home or shelter better, but I will fight for you. I wish I could do more, but the system is too messed up and too many need to be saved. I will do what I can so hang on. Hang on and believe you can survive.”
“I did. I survived. You can too. It gets better. Don’t give up.”
I held that sign with the phone number listed for the rest of the song, breaking down sobbing when it was over. I cried out my pain at having to admit what I’d been through to the world. Even that small bit was so difficult for me.
But if it could help one person to hang on, then it was worth it. If we saved even a few from abusive homes, it was all worth it.
“Why this song?” Geiger had asked me when I’d told him the plan. “You wish to comfort them with a lullaby?”
I had swallowed loudly and looked out of the window of his office. “It’s about suicide. It’s a song about not being the only one to have thought about it and begging for people to not do it. It’s about pushing through the pain and fighting.” I turned to face him. “It’s the song that saved me from ending my life when I was at my darkest.”
Horror had filled his eyes at what I’d admitted that I never had before, not to anyone. “I will make sure we get the rights. I don’t care if I go there myself in front of them and bang on their door. I will get it, Princess.”
“Thank you. And tell them why. Tell them the song saved me, and I want to help save others. That’s the purpose of all of this. If opening this can of worms can save people, it’s worth doing.”
I still stood by that. No matter how hard it was to share this part of myself with others, it was worth doing.
And it was how I could confidently face forward towards the future I knew would be better.
The End
THANK YOU for reading this book!!
Thank you so much for continuing on Tamsin’s ride with me. I woves all of you lots for your support and wanting more of my books. Please, please leave a review. It really helps me out to know which series people are eager for. I appreciate the time it takes!
I know some of you get uncomfortable when the books have content concerning mental health. A lot of it is from personal experience and my way of processing my own struggles. I know sometimes you don’t want to read it but sometimes it helps people and that’s worth all of us being a bit uncomfortable at times. It’s hard for me to talk about but we all need to be more understanding with what people go through.
If you are currently struggling, please listen to me, listen to Tamsin, and hang on. There are websites and numbers you can call whatever your country. Life is a struggle but there are days it’s worth it. Please hold on until you feel those days and reach out for help. Please.
You are loved even if you don’t feel it.
The next release will be House of Garner #7. I don’t have a date yet, but I’m getting it to editing this week. After that, might be another Artemis or Enchantress. Not sure. I’ll keep you guys posted.
I’m also doing another merch drop soon. It’s not book content but just for fun. I had some time and wanted to design something goofy. I’m waiting on the sample and we’ll go from there! I’ll post it on my socials and website, but it’s really cute and I think you guys will like it.
Bring on autumn and cooler temps! Hope you all get your pumpkin everything and be safe.
All my best,
Erin
And Vader.
Find A New Series To Love…
Accidentally Wolf: Seraphine Thomas 1
Gives New Meaning To Workplace Injury
Special Agent in Charge, Seraphine Thomas, lives for her job at the FBI. One of the youngest female agents with her own team, she thrives in undercover work to make the city she loves safer. But Sera’s on-track life is thrown into chaos when she’s attacked during a bust gone bad and is left figuring out what it means to be a werewolf.
Right away, she learns that she’s more powerful and able to do things that she shouldn’t be able to do so quickly after her transition. The rules of her old life don’t seem to apply to much now that she’s a shifter, and knowing who she can trust is even more complicated.
When she’s transferred to a special branch of the FBI made up of paranormals policing others of their kind and given a promotion, things start looking up—until her abnormal level of power creates a list of enemies for her before she’s even learned who her allies are.
