The Virgin (Breakfast at Bennett's Book 1), page 13
“I’m fine,” Jonah lied, but was it really a lie if the person you were lying to knew it was a lie? Jonah would have to try and decipher that later.
“Can I come over later?”
Jonah should say no. If he was going to keep Spencer as a friend, he should start to put some distance between them. He shouldn’t swoon at the idea of Spencer coming to check on him late at night. But he did, and that’s why he told him yes.
“Okay. Yeah.” Jonah tried to keep the enthusiasm from his voice, to be steady and even as he always was, but he was having more and more trouble with that lately, it would seem. “See you later, then.”
Jonah desperately wanted to close the distance between them. He yearned to wrap himself around Spencer and kiss him hard and deep. He’d wanted to do that all night. But he made himself give Spencer a friendly smile and a half nod before he tucked tail and went to his car. Already, he was counting down the seconds until he was alone with Spencer. He had a feeling that with every kiss, every touch, and every encounter he was dooming their friendship, but he couldn’t make himself stop.
CHAPTER 20
SPENCER
Jonah’s house was dark when Spencer arrived, but he’d texted him before he’d pulled out of Ethan’s driveway. Spencer knew the day would come when Jonah gave him the old “let's go back to being friends without benefits” speech, and he’d expected it. It was part of the deal, but it left a sour taste in the back of his mouth to think about losing Jonah.
Maybe he wasn’t. Maybe Jonah was having an off night that was completely unrelated to their current situation. Spencer let himself into Jonah’s house with the spare key he’d been given a long time ago and locked the door behind him. After removing his shoes, he crept through the house and up to the second floor where Jonah’s bedroom was.
Jonah was curled up in bed, his phone screen illuminating his face.
“You look like a glowworm,” Spencer said. Instead of lingering uncertainly in the doorway, he went to Jonah’s side and sat on the edge of the bed. He wasn’t sure if he’d be staying or not. Maybe this was when Jonah would tell him that it had been fun.
“Adult female glowworms are the ones that glow. And they glow at the end of their abdomens. So basically you said I look like a woman’s ass.”
“I mean, I’ve seen some nice asses.” Spencer grinned at Jonah, who shoved him playfully.
“You’re the worst.”
“You mean the best.” Spencer liked how he and Jonah were still playful with each other, that their intimacy hadn’t made their entire relationship different. For the most part, things were the same between them, but deeper.
“Yeah, I guess I do.” Jonah’s gaze raked over Spencer’s body before flicking up to his face. “Are you staying?”
“Would you like me to?”
Jonah responded by shuffling over to the other side of the bed and patting the empty space beside him. “Get in.”
Spencer yanked his shirt off over his head and stood to remove his pants. He didn’t want to assume Jonah would want him, and he was about to leave his underwear on, but Jonah arched an eyebrow at him.
“Get those off and get in bed with me, Spencer.” Jonah’s voice was quiet, but it was full of meaning.
Spencer couldn’t guess why, but he also didn’t want to. He’d wring every drop of pleasure he could out of this situation until Jonah called it quits and then…
He didn’t know.
He couldn’t picture not having this anymore, and maybe he should talk to Jonah about it, but the minute he climbed into bed, Jonah curled up into his side. An arm snaked over his chest, and Jonah tangled their legs together.
“Your toes are cold,” Spencer said.
Jonah moved his feet to press his toes against Spencer’s legs. “You can warm them up.”
Spencer wrapped his arm around Jonah and held him tighter. He dropped a kiss on the top of Jonah’s head and wished this was his life. Any thought of domestic bliss vanished when Jonah’s hand snaked down, lower and lower. His smooth palm grazed over Spencer’s dick, which was half hard from lying next to Jonah.
“Is this okay?” Jonah whispered.
“Yeah, ‘course.” Spencer smiled when he spoke. Jonah had come a long way since they’d started being intimate. And that’s what it was, wasn’t it? It was more than a quick Tab A goes into Slot B instruction. Spencer and Jonah had perhaps meant it to be that way, but even from that first kiss, that’s not how it had been for Spencer.
What they had was more than a simple exploration of Jonah’s body. It went deeper for him than helping out a friend. Spencer knew he had to say something, but he didn’t want to yet. Not with Jonah taking initiative and kissing his way down Spencer’s chest.
He didn’t want to interrupt his bravery, and it was selfish of Spencer. He knew that down to his bones. That he hadn’t been fair with Jonah by keeping all his burgeoning feelings from him…but there was always later. Later and later and later. Spencer would keep his feelings to himself for eternity if he thought it would keep Jonah by his side and in his bed.
But that was also a lie. Because more than sex and friendship, Jonah deserved to be in a relationship with someone he loved. Or had a chance at loving. And though Spencer cared about him, he wasn’t sure what Jonah’s feelings were. The only way to know would be to ask. And Spencer would. Right after Jonah was done teasing him.
His mouth was too talented. Too warm and wet on Spencer’s nipples. Too nimble as it danced along Spencer’s abdomen. Jonah’s breath tickled Spencer’s navel, and he found himself unable to think of anything but how fucking lucky he was to be the only one who knew how hot Jonah’s mouth was. To be the only person who’d seen him wriggle down the bed and settle between their thighs.
Jonah looked up at Spencer. “Tell me if I do anything wrong.”
Spencer huffed out a gentle laugh. “There’s no such thing.” Not with you. “Just do what feels good.”
Jonah’s lashes fluttered against his cheeks as he pulled his gaze away from Spencer’s. A perfectly pink tongue darted out, and Jonah swiped it gently against the head of Spencer’s cock. He mouthed the shaft, dragging his tongue down to the root, over the underside where the thick vein was, then back up again.
In all his life, Spencer had never seen anything more beautiful than Jonah with that impish half-smile on his face. Light and love danced in his eyes, and it was on the tip of Spencer’s tongue to tell him how gorgeous he was, but Jonah stole his oxygen when he put his mouth over the head of Spencer’s cock. His tongue swirled over the crown, and Spencer sucked in a ragged breath.
Jonah had one hand wrapped around the base of Spencer’s cock, but the other one roamed Spencer’s body. His touch was feather-light and sent shivers down his spine. He wanted to twitch away from the unbearably light caresses but also to lean into them. In the end, he held as still as possible and let out a moan that was far needier than anything he’d heard come out of his mouth before.
But something about Jonah made him yearn. Something about the way Jonah looked at him made Spencer want Jonah to look at him more. Jonah made him want, and wasn’t that the terrifying truth of it? Ever since that first kiss, Spencer had wanted more. More and more and more until he wanted everything. But he didn’t have the words to ask for anything, not with Jonah taking all the air from the room. He slowly eased more of Spencer’s cock into his mouth, not very deep but that didn’t matter when Spencer reveled in Jonah touching him everywhere.
Spencer reached down and ran his fingers through Jonah’s hair. Jonah purred, which made Spencer gasp and twitch from the sensation of feeling the audible pleasure vibrate up his cock.
“That’s so good.” He stopped himself before he called Jonah baby. Not only was he suddenly unsure of what terms of endearment Jonah would be okay with, but he was keenly aware of the fact that this was temporary. Jonah wasn’t his baby. He was his best friend. His very best friend. Losing him would gut Spencer. His plan to tell Jonah about the emotions that stirred within him was built on shaky ground.
Jonah switched his attention to Spencer’s balls. He laved his tongue over the sensitive flesh while slowly jacking Spencer's dick, using only spit as lube.
“You’re amazing.” Spencer closed his eyes and relaxed into the bed, momentarily content to forget about the problem with his pesky emotions. It wasn't like he could think straight with Jonah’s lips around his cock anyway. “Feels fantastic… Oh, my God.”
“Can I?”
Spencer raised his head and opened his eyes. “Can you what?”
Jonah’s face was beet-red, but he managed to power through his obvious embarrassment and ask for what he wanted. “Can I finger you?”
“Do you have lube?”
Jonah rolled his eyes. “No, Spencer. I, a flaming homosexual, don't keep lube in my bedroom. Top drawer.”
Spencer rolled over to grab the bottle of lube and toss it to Jonah. “Just go slow and use as much lube as you want.”
“What if I hurt you?” Jonah looked suddenly younger and more scared than Spencer remembered seeing him.
“You won’t,” Spencer said confidently. “You have the skinniest fingers I’ve ever seen.”
Jonah rolled his eyes again. “Ha ha. Very funny.” Nerves made Jonah’s voice tremble.
“You won’t hurt me,” Spencer told him, his voice soft but steady and filled with conviction.
With freshly-lubed fingers, Jonah returned to his position between Spencer’s legs. Spencer spread his legs wider, bending them at the knees to give Jonah a better angle to work with.
Jonah kept his gaze trained on Spencer for a heavy moment before pulling his attention away from his face and focusing on what his hands were doing. Gently, maybe too gently, Jonah stroked Spencer’s cock, but Spencer would bite his tongue off before he said anything Jonah might take as a criticism. A finger slowly teased the rim of Spencer’s hole.
If the breath that quivered out of Spencer was slightly nervous, Jonah would never know. It had been a long time since Spencer let anyone play with him like this. Truth be told, a lot of the men he’d dated didn’t have any interest in being anything but a bottom. Spencer was okay with that. Mostly he was a top, but sometimes if the mood was right and so was the person, he could be convinced to bottom.
Jonah would never be the wrong person.
Jonah sucked in a deep breath, as if he was the one about to get breached, and slowly slid the tip of a finger inside Spencer.
“That’s it, keep going,” Spencer whispered encouragingly.
“You’re so tight.” Jonah’s face was bright red, a mix of both lust and obvious embarrassment coloring his cheeks.
“You won’t hurt me,” Spencer told him again. “It already feels good.”
Spencer wanted to keep himself propped up on his elbows so he could see what was going on because watching Jonah explore was hot. But the more he looked, the more self-conscious Jonah appeared. Spencer lay down again, letting his eyes close, and exhaled a deep breath as Jonah’s finger slid deeper.
“Holy shit, Spencer,” Jonah whispered reverently. His free hand splayed out over Spencer’s abdomen, then ran down his body. Jonah slid it lower to Spencer’s inner thigh and nudged his legs further apart.
Jonah leaned down and his wickedly warm mouth sealed over the head of Spencer’s cock again. He worked his finger in deeper, then slid it out. Then in again. All while his tongue swirled and lapped at the head of Spencer’s dick. He was going to come like a fountain soon if Jonah wasn’t careful.
The finger slid back in again, and this time, another one joined it. The stretch burned enough to hold off his impending orgasm, but not forever, because Jonah’s adventurous digits found Spencer’s prostate.
Spencer grit his teeth. His stomach muscles went rigid with the effort to hold back. But Jonah was pegging his prostate now, stroking with confident fingers as he sucked Spencer’s dick. Spencer lifted his head—he needed to see.
Jonah was stretched out between Spencer’s legs. He couldn’t see his face, but he admired the long lean lines of Jonah’s body and the way his hips wriggled and thrust as he pushed Spencer closer to release.
That every night could be like this was Spencer’s greatest wish. He dreamed every one of Jonah’s touches were his to hoard.
Hi breath caught in his chest, but he managed to croak out a warning to Jonah before he came. Jonah was undeterred by Spencer’s raspy warning, and he tilted his head to look at Spencer. His lusty, hooded gaze was enough to tip Spencer over the edge and flood Jonah’s mouth. Excess cum ran down Spencer’s shaft, and Jonah pulled off, panting and gasping and humping the bed as his fingers still worked tirelessly in Spencer’s ass, stroking and sliding, pegging his prostate until Spencer twitched in a way that Jonah understood wasn’t a good twitch.
Jonah exhaled a shaky breath and slowly removed his fingers from Spencer’s ass. Before Jonah could say anything, Spencer reached down and tugged him up into his arms. He sealed their mouths together, kissing him long and hard and deep. Licking the flavor of his own release off Jonah’s tongue.
The kiss ended with Jonah pulling away. “I sort of… I’m going to need to change the sheets. Sorry.”
“You came without touching yourself? That’s hot.”
“Really?”
Spencer cupped Jonah’s cheek and pulled him in for another kiss. “Really.”
Jonah looked downright bashful as he kissed Spencer one more time before climbing off him, apologetically explaining that he was going to clean up and be right back.
Spencer would tell him how much he cared about him when he got back, when they were snuggled in bed next to each other. He closed his eyes for just a moment.
CHAPTER 21
JONAH
Jonah slid out of bed, leaving Spencer there sprawled out on his back, not so gently snoring. He barely resisted the urge to brush the hair off Spencer’s face, not wanting to wake him. Quietly he dressed in a pair of khakis and an old henley, one getting worn out that he couldn’t seem to part with, despite the pinholes in the bottom of the shirt.
He left a note on the nightstand for Spencer, explaining that he was meeting his dad for breakfast at the diner and that he’d bring something back for him. Jonah wanted to find Spencer still there in his bed when he returned. He hoped the note wasn’t too subtle, but he wasn’t quite brave enough yet to come out and ask for all the things he wanted.
Jonah arrived before the diner opened and slipped in the back using his key. Taylor was already there with headphones on, going through his morning kitchen ritual. Whatever that was. Jonah admittedly hadn’t worked in the diner in any capacity since his college days. Certainly not since Taylor had taken over the kitchen operations.
Jonah’s dad was in the front putting the chairs back on the floor where they belonged. Jonah jumped in to help.
“Good morning, Jonah. Sleep well?” his dad asked. Ethan Bennett was about as subtle as a heart attack. What he really wanted to know was whether Jonah was still moody and miserable like he’d been the night before.
“I slept fine, thanks. What’s Taylor making us for breakfast?” Jonah wasn’t sure how much he could eat on his nervous stomach, but he’d do his best to put on a good show for his dad.
“I told him to surprise us.”
Jonah groaned. “The last time you said that, we got waffles shaped like dicks.”
“They were still good.” His dad defended the waffle-dicks, because of course he did. “It was a bit much when he asked if he could put them on the menu.”
“He didn’t!”
They moved to the next table, took the chairs off, and put them on the floor.
“He did. He had a good pout about it when I put my foot down. Then he got revenge in the form of an avocado tree that he left in my living room.”
“A fucking what?”
“Yep. It’s not quite a tree, but it’s definitely sprouted. I swear that kid could plant a dead stick and it would grow.”
With all the chairs down, Jonah’s dad waved him over to their usual booth. “I’ll bring coffee, you go sit.”
Jonah did as he was told and wondered how long breakfast was going to take and whether Spencer was still asleep. He hoped to find him there when he returned home so he could… Nope. He couldn’t think of what he wanted to do with his sleeping giant when he was at breakfast with his dad. The last thing he wanted was a stupid erection in the middle of breakfast.
Jonah’s dad arrived with two cups of coffee. He set them on the table, then took the seat opposite to Jonah. From the kitchen, Jonah heard Taylor announce that breakfast would be ready in ten minutes. A knock on the front door had Ethan getting up and quickly letting in two of his part-time employees. The diner would open in a few minutes anyway, so Ethan left the door unlocked and flipped the open sign on.
“Sorry about that,” his dad said as he sat back down.
“Two part-timers today?” Jonah arched an eyebrow. “What’s up?”
“I wanted to ask you that same question. It’s why I called them in. I know you think I don’t notice when you’re going through shit, and I know sometimes I don’t, and I haven’t. But I noticed this time, Jonah. I wanted to make sure you’re okay.”
“I’m fine.” Jonah’s answer probably came too quickly, too snappish and forced. “I’m fine,” he repeated, softer this time.
His dad only nodded as he added two spoons of sugar to his coffee. “I think your definition of fine and my definition of fine are two different things. You know you can talk to me about stuff. I want to help.”
“I’m fine, Dad.” Jonah’s voice stayed steadier than he’d expected it to. Thankfully it didn’t crack because something inside him was breaking, but he didn’t know what or why or how to stop it. He had the sinking feeling that if he wanted to find out, he was at breakfast with the wrong person. “Don’t worry about me.”
