Must Love Flowers, page 13
“That was my thought, too,” he said, grinning now. “I’m sorry, Joan.”
“Don’t be silly, there’s nothing to apologize for.”
“Thanks.” His relief was obvious. “I hope you’ll return.”
“I plan on it. I think if I was a no-show, Mary Lou would come get me.”
Phil chuckled at that. “Then we’re square?” she asked.
“We’re square,” he concurred, and gave her a dazzling smile.
Just then Todd came racing up to the front of the yard.
“Can I play with Edison?” he asked. “Mom said I could if it was all right with you.”
“I’m sorry, Todd, but Edison is on a walk with my son and Maggie.” Todd had already met Maggie when he and his sister had stopped off earlier in the week.
Todd hung his head in disappointment but recovered quickly. “Mom said if you offered me a cookie, I could have it.”
Joan had baked a couple days earlier, seeing how often Todd and Ellie came by to play with Edison. “Let me check the cookie jar.”
She entered the house, and when she returned, she saw Phil talking to the youngster. He was showing him a snapdragon plant that was in the bed of his truck, along with several flats of flowers. Todd’s eyes were huge as he hung on every word Phil said.
“Joan, Joan, did you know snapdragons can talk? Phil showed me. It’s really cool.”
Joan handed him a chocolate-chip cookie and Todd’s smile covered his whole face. “Thank you,” the boy said, ever-so-politely.
“You’re most welcome.” Todd had chocolate smeared on both sides of his mouth as he quickly downed the treat.
“Guess what? Dad’s getting the backyard fenced soon and then I can have a dog of my own,” he said with his mouth full, too excited to swallow before he shared the good news.
“That’s great,” Joan said, exchanging a smile with Phil as he loaded his equipment into the bed of his truck.
“Hey, what about me?” Phil called out. “Don’t I get a cookie, too?”
Joan chuckled and shook her head. “I’ll see what I can do.” Returning to the house, she brought out a couple more cookies for Phil.
“You’re a woman after my own heart,” Phil teased. He climbed into his truck and, with a jaunty wave, drove off.
Joan watched as he turned the corner and was out of sight. She was disappointed that Phil hadn’t mentioned what had brought him to the group. She wanted to ask, and would have if Todd hadn’t shown up when he did.
Todd left soon after he finished his cookie, as a friend of his passed by on his bicycle.
Nick and Maggie hadn’t come back from their walk yet, which boded well. She felt certain the two would hit it off once they got over their troubling start.
Feeling good, Joan decided she wanted to update her sister on the latest developments taking place in her life.
Reaching for her phone, she punched in Emmie’s name.
“Hey,” her sister greeted, her usual cheerful self.
“Emmie, you won’t believe what’s happened. I joined a grief therapy group.”
“Oh Joan.” Her sister breathed her name as if sighing in relief. “I have waited four long years for you to get the help you need. Tell me everything.”
Joan, who normally avoided long phone conversations, talked nonstop for a good while, updating her sister on each member of the group. Best of all, Joan told her she hadn’t broken into tears even once and how she’d found a friend in Mary Lou.
“Sounds like this group was made especially for you.”
“Funny thing, the landscaper I hired is also in the group.”
“Well, that’s a surprise.”
“It certainly was, and for him, too. He’s a good person.”
“I think he must be. I remember what you told me, about him helping Maggie collect her things from her father’s house. Not everyone would have been willing to step in like that.”
Joan agreed.
“So he’s a widower?”
“No, I think he’s married. He didn’t mention who he’d lost. I have to assume it was a close family member. A child, or possibly a sibling.”
“I’m just so happy that you’re finally dealing with your grief.”
Joan was pleased with the changes she’d made, too.
“Were there any eligible men attending the group?” Emmie asked.
Joan silently groaned. “Emmie, I’m nowhere near ready for any kind of a relationship.”
“But you will be in time, right?”
“In time,” Joan agreed, emphasizing the words.
They talked a few minutes longer, and then Nick and Maggie returned with Edison. Joan watched the two of them and smiled. If there was any romance brewing in this house, it was the one happening right before her eyes.
“Mom,” Nick said, coming into the kitchen. “You’ve got a visitor.”
“Oh.”
“She said her name is Ellie.”
Joan met Ellie at the front door.
Hands on her hips, Ellie asked, “Did you give Todd a cookie? Because Mom said he wasn’t supposed to ask for one.”
Joan tried hard to hide a smile. “I did. Would you like one, too?”
“I would,” she said with a hard nod, satisfied now that she hadn’t been cheated out of a treat.
“Do you want to come inside?” Joan asked.
“Okay,” Ellie said, eager now.
Joan opened the door and realized that, in the span of such a short while, she’d opened the door of her heart as well.
Chapter 18
Humming to herself, Joan carted the bags of groceries from her car into the house. When she opened the front door, she gasped. Edison was barking like crazy, and when she saw why, she dropped the bag. The grapefruit spilled out and scattered haphazardly, rolling onto the kitchen floor. Edison stood on his hind legs in his crate, leaning against the wire to look at the stranger who’d invaded the house.
“Steve,” she cried. “You scared the living daylights out of me.”
“Sorry, Mom,” he said, looking guilty. He must have let himself into the house, but she wasn’t sure how.
As if reading her thoughts, he answered the unasked question. “The key hidden in the rock was still there.”
“Of course.” It surprised her that he remembered, seeing that she’d completely forgotten about it.
“I told you I was coming into town for a conference, remember?” Steve said, grinning. “By the way, I like what you’ve done with the yard. It looks great.”
Joan couldn’t take credit for the lawn, but the flower beds were quickly taking shape. She’d planted annuals, and the burst of color they added uplifted her spirits every time she stepped out the door.
“I was able to catch an early flight, after all. The conference doesn’t start”—he paused and glanced at the time—“for another couple hours.”
“That’s great.” Still reeling with the shock of finding him at the house, she had yet to collect her thoughts. “It’s really good to see you.”
“You, too.”
They hugged, and then Steve went after the fallen grapefruit and set them on top of the kitchen counter.
Joan had ventured out to the grocery store run by Amazon for the first time. Maggie had casually mentioned it over dinner the night before. Curious, Joan had wanted to check it out. Since the pandemic, she’d almost always ordered whatever she needed online and had it delivered. With the possibility of exposure to the virus, it didn’t seem necessary or prudent to risk shopping in person when she didn’t need to.
“Is that all?” Steve asked.
“All?”
“Groceries?”
“Oh, sorry, no, there’s a couple other bags in the car.”
“I’ll get ’em.” He bounded out the front door, eager to help.
While Steve was collecting her bags, Joan freed Edison from his crate. She took him into the backyard to do his business, which he did in quick order. She brought him back into the house and rewarded him with a doggie treat.
Steve returned with the two additional bags, setting them on the kitchen counter alongside the grapefruit. Joan promptly unloaded the goods, setting aside the items to go into the refrigerator.
“Did you know,” she said, full of wonder and enthusiasm, “at some stores you don’t even need to go to a checkout stand? What is happening to our world? This is crazy. You put the item in the cart, and the cost is automatically calculated. Unbelievable!”
Edison chased a toy beneath the table.
“Mom, that’s been around for a while now,” Steve told her.
“It was a first for me,” she said, still a little in awe of the entire process. Grocery shopping had been an eye-opening experience.
Her son grinned as if he found her enthusiasm amusing.
“That’s not all. I was in the mall the other day, and I bought myself a new pair of shoes. The salesclerk said I didn’t need to insert the credit card into the machine. All I had to do was tap it.” That was another electronic marvel that had taken Joan by surprise.
Steve helped her load items into the refrigerator. “Mom, you’ve been living under a rock ever since the pandemic hit. These things aren’t new, they’ve been around for ages.” He said it in a teasing tone that took the sting out of his words.
“You’re right,” she admitted. “I can’t help but wonder what other changes have taken place that I know nothing about.”
“You’ll find out soon enough.”
No doubt she would. Now that all the groceries were put in place, Steve sat down at the kitchen table.
“Coffee?” she asked, remembering how much her older son enjoyed his java.
“Sure.” He relaxed on the kitchen chair. Knowing how involved Steve was in his work, she was pleased he’d taken the time to stop by.
Joan brewed him a cup and then one for herself before taking a chair next to her son. She took a moment to study him. Steve was in his late twenties and handsome. He looked good. He’d always taken pride in his appearance. He was dressed in a suit and tie, which told her the conference he’d mentioned was important and likely one that would advance his career. He was the taller of the two boys, standing at six feet, with wide shoulders and a narrow waist. From the little he’d mentioned about his job, she knew he worked long hours.
“I will say the puppy is cute,” he said, reaching down and setting Edison in his lap. The dog looked up at him suspiciously and then started chewing on Steve’s fingers. “I wasn’t pleased when Nick told me what he’d done. Ouch, his teeth are sharp.” Jerking his hand away, he waved it several times.
Joan laughed. “It’s your fault for giving him your fingers.”
Steve grinned. “I’m glad it’s worked out.”
“Best gift I’ve had in years,” Joan said, and reached over to pet Edison’s head.
Steve set the dog back down on the kitchen floor. “You’re being overly kind. He should have at least asked first.”
“I’m glad he didn’t, because I would have refused. Instead, he didn’t give me much choice. It’s worked out for the best, as Edison quickly wormed his way into my heart.” She picked up the dog and set him in her lap. Content, Edison immediately licked her hand before settling down to nap.
“My goodness, it’s good to see you.” The last time had been the Christmas after they’d buried Jared, and then right after that the country had closed down. Steve had kept in touch, but not nearly as often as Joan would have liked. She accepted that Steve carried a lot of responsibility with his job. He’d always been ambitious. Reading between the lines of things he’d mentioned, her son was looking to be promoted to distribution warehouse manager within the year.
“It’s good to see you, too.” He crossed his legs and sipped his coffee, looking mature beyond his years.
Her sons appeared to be regularly communicating, and while that pleased Joan, she would have enjoyed a few more of those conversations herself.
“How’s the boarder working out for you?”
“Does my having a boarder concern you?” she asked, her voice tightening with the question.
“Concern me?” Steve repeated. “Not at all. In fact, I think it’s a good idea.”
That was a relief. “Maggie’s helped me adjust.” She didn’t feel the need to explain further.
“That’s great, Mom.”
“I’m becoming a regular social butterfly,” she told him.
“A what?” He frowned with the question.
“A butterfly. You know, breaking out of my cocoon. It was something Emmie said recently. Maggie’s been a great support. She even encouraged me to attend a grief therapy group, though I had my doubts.”
“Have you?”
“I did, and am seeing a therapist one-on-one as well. Dr. O’Brien runs the grief therapy group.”
“You’ll continue going, right?”
“I will. The group meets on Wednesdays.” She’d agreed to one session and that was all, but she would be happy to return. Mary Lou had phoned earlier, and they’d met for coffee before Joan went to the store. “The group was different from what I expected; everyone was encouraging and kind. I…didn’t say much,” she added, but didn’t give the reason. “Next time I won’t hesitate, and I’ll join the others for coffee afterward, which I understand is something the group does on a regular basis.”
Edison studied Steve, cocking his head to one side as if to say her son had passed muster.
“No worries, little one, Steve is family.”
The puppy appeared to amuse him. “From the way he reacted when I came into the house, it looks like he’s going to be a good guard dog.”
Time would tell. “I see that Nick’s been updating you on what’s been happening.”
“We talk often. For a long time, our conversations revolved mostly around you.”
“Me?”
“Mom, we were worried, both of us. You never seemed to adjust to losing Dad. I know it was a blow, but, Mom, it’s been four years. You’ve been in this emotional black hole and neither one of us knew how best to help you.”
“I’m moving forward.”
“I can see that. I have to tell you it’s a relief. Nick and I were unsure what to do. We were about to have an intervention.”
She’d heard of these before, of course. Concerned family and friends confronted a loved one with their considerable worries. What bothered Joan was what they might have said and how she would have reacted.
The night of her birthday dinner, Nick had basically said that they’d both been at a loss on how to help her. She remembered how he’d mentioned not being able to talk to her or get her advice when he was considering buying a house. Her grief and inability to move on had deeply affected them. Caught up in her own loss, she hadn’t given enough thought to the fact that her sons needed her now even more than before. They’d lost their father and were hurting, too. Being unable to look past her own pain, Joan had basically ignored her sons.
“It doesn’t matter, because it’s no longer necessary,” Steve said, “and I for one am grateful. Neither of us was eager to confront you; thankfully, the matter took care of itself.”
From Steve’s apologetic look, he seemed to regret having said anything.
“You’ve clearly made some positive changes in the last few weeks,” Steve continued. “It was what Nick and I had hoped would happen for a long time. Living in Arizona, I wish I’d been around more to help you. I should have phoned more often, and I’m sorry I didn’t, mainly because I felt at a loss as to what to say or what I could do to help you.”
“It’s fine, sweetheart. No worries, I understand.” Seeing him so rarely, she didn’t want their conversation to dissolve into regrets from the last four years. Recovering as best she could, she set her gaze on Edison, hoping Steve wouldn’t see the hurt in her eyes. She needed time to analyze how her sadness had affected her sons. That they’d been worried enough to discuss an intervention shook her to the core. Joan hoped she could make up for the years she’d been remote and emotionally unavailable to them. “Update me on what’s going on in your life.”
Steve shrugged. “Nothing much.”
“Are you still seeing Zoe?” she asked, venturing into uncertain territory, hoping Steve would share what had happened to that relationship.
He shrugged as if it wasn’t a big deal. “Off and on.”
From earlier conversations it had seemed the two were in a committed relationship. Something had changed. The look he gave her seemed to suggest his girlfriend was a closed subject.
“What about work?”
Another halfhearted lift of his shoulders. “It’s good. I put in a lot of hours.”
“Are you saving your money?” Jared had been a stickler when it came to teaching his sons the benefits of saving a certain amount of every dime they earned. He made sure they understood the value of a dollar. While Joan and her husband could afford to buy each of their sons a car, Jared had insisted Steve and Nick contribute at least half of the total cost.
“You don’t need to worry about me, Mom.”
“I’m not worried,” she rushed to tell him. “It’s just that I’d like to know how you’re doing, what’s important to you and how I can be there for you.”
“Thanks, Mom, that means a lot. For a long time, it wasn’t easy to talk to you, you know?”
Guilt weighed her down, and then anger. This was Jared’s fault. He was the one who’d left them. He was the one who had delayed his physical, too concerned about taking time off, claiming it was too hard to clear his schedule, even when Joan had assured him she could free up his time and that it was important. The doctor couldn’t have predicted an aneurysm, but Jared was at fault, too, for not taking his health seriously.
“I’m sorry, Steve.”
“Mom—”
