False Idols: A Dark College Romance, page 35
“I don’t need a knife to fucking kill you,” I tell them and throw the lamp at them with all my strength. The ceramic shatters when it hits them and I grab the next thing on the table beside me. It’s a heavy iron horse statue and I’m going to use it to bash their brains in. There’s a crash and I look to the side. Beau and The Reaper are in his father’s office. I start towards the door but the robed person in front of me moves with me and blocks me from getting in the office.
“What is wrong with you? Why are you doing this?” The questions come out before I can stop them. I don’t expect an answer but I get one anyhow.
“You’ve been judged and this is your penance,” a woman answers me and my heart breaks. I know that voice. “Thus I will punish the world for its evil and the wicked for their iniquity,” she says. She reaches back to push her hood back but I already know the face I’m going to see.
“Minnie,” I whisper.
Minnie gives me a mean smile and points her knife at me. “You’re a real fucking pain in my ass, Nevaeh.”
“What are you doing? Is someone making you do this?” I ask her.
She laughs. The sound is dark and bitter. “The only one making me do anything is you! You’re making me do this.”
I shake my head. “What? No!” I scream at her. “We were friends. I loved you and then you abandoned me!”
“Because you’re a liar, Nevaeh. A filthy fucking liar that needs to be punished. But I gotta tell you, I never thought you were a whore. Guess that good girl act was all a lie too, wasn’t it?” Minnie brings her hands up and raises her voice in a mimic of mine. “I’m a virgin and I want to wait till I’m married. Oh, I can’t smoke or drink, it’s wrong.” She drops her hands and spits in my direction.
“You’re a fucking liar, Nevaeh and now I’m going to cut that lying tongue of yours out of your head and make sure you never fucking lie again.”
“You were my best friend.” I say the words but even as I do, I know the truth. I was never Minnie’s best friend. I was always held just a little further away than I wanted. I thought it was because I was needy.
Now I know the truth.
“And I hated every second of it. I was only your friend because how could I not be? You were the Mineral Belt survivor and my neighbor. Do you know the shit I would get if I wasn’t your friend? I never liked you and your holier than thou fucking attitude. Always little miss perfect, always the center of attention because you wanted it that way. I hated every second with you, but I couldn’t tell anyone. Only Pastor Mike. He understood me when no one else did. He knows what kind of parasite you really are.”
Oh my god. Pastor Mike. What has she done to Pastor Mike?
“What did you do to him? Did you hurt him?!” Pastor Mike was always there for me when no one else was. What if something happened to him? What if he’s somewhere cut up like my mother?
“Shut your mouth about him!” Minnie screams and points her knife at me. “You don’t know anything about him! He saw you for what you were. The perpetually helpless victim.”
I shake my head. That’s not true. Pastor Mike knew what I’d been through. He’d never say that. “You’re a liar,” I tell her. The anger in me is fading. It’s hard to stand in the face of Minnie. I loved her, thought of her as a sister and not a day went by that I didn’t look for her. It was only in the past month that she’d abandoned me over the news about Beau. I wondered how she could have done it so quickly, cut me off from one day to the next like I never existed, but now I know.
She never loved me like I did her. She hated me.
“It’s the truth, Nevaeh! You loved being a victim.” Minnie slashes at me and I dance away from her blade. There’s a thud and a sound of shattering glass in the next room, but I can’t get around her to help Beau. “The one that got away from The Reaper. Well, you know what? Now you’re just going to be another dumb slut who gets her throat cut. Just like that whore whose heart I cut out.”
She killed Ali. Not The Reaper. Minnie.
She screams at me when she lunges at me and I dodge her. Minnie is moving too fast and slams into the end table I was just beside. She’s still screaming, even when she’s bent over the table and trying to turn when I bring the horse statue down on her. I hit her on the back of her head and her screaming stops. I don’t, though. I bring the statue down again and again. I hear her knife hit the floor and I slam the statue into her once more before I step away from her. My heart is racing and I can hardly catch my breath when I turn to the office door. Minnie slides off the table and hits the floor with a thud beside me, but I don’t look. I barrel towards the office and kick the door open. Beau’s knife is gone and he’s on the table with The Reaper above him. He’s holding him back, but just barely. The tip of the knife is in Beau’s chest and I can see blood blooming around the knife. It stains the white shirt he’s wearing and I don’t think, I act. I cross the room in two steps and swing the horse statue at The Reaper.
My swing goes wide, but I hit their back hard enough to give Beau the opening he needs to get away. He shoves The Reaper back and swings at him. The punch lands true and The Reaper’s head snaps back. Their hood falls back from the force of Beau’s punch.
I drop the horse statue and feel like the world tilts on its side when The Reaper turns to me and we lock eyes. “Pastor Mike?”
“Hello, Nevaeh.” Pastor Mike sounds normal. He even smiles at me. I half expect him to say this was all a misunderstanding, but how can it be when he just had his knife in Beau’s chest and he killed my mother.
“It was you? You’re T-the Reaper?”
I can’t believe it. How many vigils and sermons did Pastor Mike lead? So many of them. He stood at the front of the church and asked us to pray for the souls of those taken too early. How many parents did he comfort when they poured their grief out to him? Pastor Mike talked about the evil in the world and how we needed community more than ever, but all along it was his knife that cut and ripped Bloom apart.
Pastor Mike sighs and clasps his hands in front of him. The knife in his hand is so casually held that I feel like I’m the one that’s wrong. The one that’s losing their mind.
“The field is the world and the good seed is the sons of the kingdom. The weeds are the sons of the evil one,” he says. Beau flips him off, but still Pastor Mike keeps speaking, “What kind of shepherd would I be if I let you descend into depravity on your own? It’s my job to pull the weeds. To keep the world pure. What kind of pastor would I be if I didn’t?”
“A sane one that doesn’t fucking kill people,” Beau snaps and rounds the desk to stand beside me. He takes my hand the second he’s near me. “You okay?” he asks me but his eyes don’t leave Pastor Mike.
“I’m fine,” I tell him and swallow hard. “The other one was Minnie,” I say quietly.
“Fuck,” Beau breathes, but Pastor Mike’s eyes go to the other room.
“What did you do to my disciple?” he growls. He’s finally realized it’s too quiet. That Minnie isn’t coming to save him.
“I fucking killed her. You’re on your own now.”
Rage fills Pastor Mike’s eyes and he stops holding his knife like a Bible. Instead, he points it at us and takes a step forward. “You are vermin! She was a pure soul and you defiled her!”
“No she wasn’t! She was supposed to be my friend and you killed my mother,” I scream back. “She was your most devout parishioner. Why did you kill her?” My mother would have given the Church anything. She might not have loved me, but she loved Pastor Mike. She loved Crown of Thorns. Nothing about her death makes sense.
“I killed your mother because she was a whore!” Pastor Mike explodes and he starts to pace the length of the office as he rants. “Your mother hid behind lies and deceit, but her deeds came to light soon enough. When they did, I purified her. Her adultery made her in need of redemption. For the Lord is vengeful and strong in wrath. The Lord is vengeful against his foes; he rages against his enemies.”
Beau winces and sags against the wall. “Fuck his Bible quoting ass. I’m going to kill him,” he says but I see how Beau is hurt. I have to keep The Reaper talking. I have to find a way to end this.
“Adultery?” I ask. “Who? Who did she sin with?”
Pastor Mike laughs and wipes at his face with the hand holding his knife. The casual juxtaposition of the bloody blade near the face I know so well makes me sick. He was never Pastor Mike. He’s always been The Reaper.
“With none other than John Du Pont.”
Beau makes a strangled sound at hearing his father’s name and I understand. Outside of cleaning their house, I never once saw my mother speak to Mr. Du Pont. When did she find the time to be with him? How did I never know?
“I’ll be paying your wicked father a visit when I’m done here. He has a debt to pay if he wants to save his soul like your mother did,” he says and gestures around the room. “This house of sin made a perfect resting place for your mother.”
My eyes water. I never felt close or loved by my mom, but what happened to her was more than horrific. More than anyone ever deserved to have done to them. The terror she must have felt at it being Pastor Mike, the man she trusted more than anyone, that tortured and killed her.
“You’re sick. She trusted you.”
“And she defiled her body with another woman’s husband. She lost her right to salvation when she sinned, Nevaeh.”
“When did you kill her?” I ask, ignoring his words. I don’t care about the reason he had for killing her. “When?”
“The day I brought your things, of course,” he tells me and I feel sick. “Made a rather neat go of it to deal with that slut’s soul and collect your things,” he pauses and looks at me with a sigh. “That was, of course, before you dirtied your soul.”
“What are you talking about? You were always going to kill me because I lied,” I say. Minnie wanted to punish me for my lie about Beau, but she also hated me. She was never my friend, but Pastor Mike? I trusted him like anyone else in town.
“No, you didn’t mean that,” he said and gave me a pitying look, like he was still the one that was right. The one meant to offer counsel. “You tried to tell them, but no one listened. I know this, you told me.” It’s true. I did tell him about Beau and my doubts because no one else would listen. Pastor Mike was safe. He promised to keep my secret. He promised Minnie the same. My hands shake. How close was I to being where Minnie is? Would I have fallen under Pastor Mike’s hand if he’d pushed me to?
How close to the edge was Minnie that he was able to turn her into a killer? If it happened to her, it could easily have been me. Or anyone for that matter. Good, bad, evil. It’s all relative at the end of the day.
“Then why? Why are you after me?! I trusted you!”
“Because you laid with him,” The Reaper says and points his knife at Beau. I glance at Beau and see he looks pale. He’s lost too much blood. He has one hand against the wall and glares at The Reaper.
“She fucked my brains out. No laying involved,” Beau says. I know he’s going to do something stupid. The Reaper’s eyes go to him and when he takes a step towards him, my heart turns to ice.
I watch The Reaper sneer at Beau. “You were always so prideful. Always. That’s the Du Pont family’s greatest sin,” he snarls.
“You couldn’t stand me getting credit for your kill so you gift wrapped the murder weapon to the cops,” Beau shoots back and even though he looks weak he laughs. “What’s the matter? Your ego couldn’t take people thinking I was The Reaper? You could have kept killing if you’d left Nevaeh and I out of this.”
“There was never any leaving either of you out of this!” The Reaper explodes. “You survived me. Survived God’s hand! No one is allowed to look upon the Lord! ‘He said, you cannot see my face, for man shall not see me and live. '”
His knife flashes in the light when he slashes it at us along with his words. “You had to be judged. Retribution paid. The both of you forced my hand with your sinful behavior.” He looks at me. “That was when your soul was done. You were going down the same path as your mother. I could not let evil like that grow in the world. You needed to be dealt with. Do you think I didn’t see what you did at that party?” The Reaper asks, but he’s walking towards Beau.
“The both of you, sinful, depraved souls. You watched him touch her, Nevaeh. You loved it. Minnie destroyed that temptation from ever happening again, but that still leaves you.”
He means Ali. That’s why they killed her. Remorse washes over me sharp and quick. She’s dead for what happened at the party, but he’s not wrong. I did love it. I watched Beau then, now I need The Reaper to watch me. I have to get The Reaper out of the room before he goes after Beau again. If he does, Beau won’t survive it. He’s not strong enough anymore.
But I am.
I take a step away from him and towards the door. I already know what I have to do.
“So why haven’t you?” I ask him and start to walk backwards to the door. “Why haven’t you dealt with me?”
The Reaper narrows his eyes and I watch the last piece of the man I knew fall away. “Oh, but I have,” he growls.
“Really? Because I’m still fucking alive, you sack of shit! How is that dealing with me?”
Beau groans and holds a hand out to me. “Nevaeh, stop!”
“I love you,” I tell him before I turn back to The Reaper. “You think you’re big and bad? That you’re the hand of God wiping sin away from this world? I don’t fucking think so. You’re a pathetic man. A fuck up that likes hurting people.”
The Reaper stops, he looks at me. I have his attention now. “Stop your lies,” he commands.
“How am I lying?” I ask. I’m just a foot away from the door now. “The hand of God wouldn’t fail when it comes to killing a sinner like me, now would they?” Rage builds on The Reaper's face and he starts to come my way. My plan is working. “You are not divinely protected or appointed. Not until you kill me.” I take one final step back as I say that, but my next move is a sprint. I turn and run out of the room with The Reaper a few steps behind me. We pass Minnie’s body and I hear their strangled cry when they see her on the floor with blood coming from her ears.
Somewhere in the distance, Beau screams for me, but I keep going. I slam the door behind me and run straight across the hall to the master where Beau and I slept. I lock the door and almost trip as I go for the gun safe in the closet.
“4289,” I chant as I rip the door open and fall to my knees in front of the gun safe there. “4289, 4289, 4289.” I punch the numbers in with shaky fingers and the door behind me almost gives when The Reaper kicks it. The gun safe unlocks with a click and I rip the door open. Inside, there’s a tray with the gun and a box of bullets. I pull it out and the bullets fall out of the box when it hits the floor.
I take a deep breath and try not to panic. The Reaper kicks the door again and I load the gun. I’ve only ever seen guns in movies, but I still manage to snap the magazine in place. The door flies open and I scream. I squeeze the trigger but nothing happens and The Reaper does not slow. He runs right at me, the knife in his hand raised high.
“Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord,” He howls and I know he’s right. My hands are too shaky and I almost drop it when I pull the trigger, again to nothing. “I’m going to rip your soul out! It’s mine!”
The safety, I realize. I never turned the safety off. I look down and hit the mechanism.The Reaper is only a step away. He’s so close I can feel the warmth from his body. My hands shake while I disengage the safety and I almost drop the gun. I’m not fast enough. I know I’m not. The certainty of it sinks into me and a second later The Reaper slams into me. I go flying and the gun flies out of my hand and slides across the floor. I half expect a knife to sink into me, but it doesn’t come. Instead, The Reaper grabs me by my hair and forces me to my feet.
I swing at him and miss, but The Reaper doesn’t. He punches me and I almost black out from the pain of it. My legs give out and I hit the floor when he lets me go.
“You dirty fucking slut. You’re just like your mother!” He screams at me as he starts to pace the room. “There was hope for you, Nevaeh. I thought you might be different, but in the end you proved me right. Just like all the rest.”
I moan and roll to my side. My jaw feels like it’s shattered, but I don’t have time to process it before I’m kicked hard in the side. I scream and hit the wall from the force of the blow. I think he cracked a rib. I grab at my side and scramble away from him. Adrenaline and pain mingle in equal parts and force me to move. I have to get away. I have to find that fucking gun and blow The Reaper’s head off. I force myself up from the floor and grab the perfume bottle off the dressing table beside me. The bottle shatters against the wall behind the killer in front of me and I grab another.
“Fuck you, you psycho!”
“You have been judged, Nevaeh. Your soul is found to be black and sinful.” The Reaper points his knife at me and smiles. “You have sinned. Now repent.”
I shake my head and hurl another bottle and then another. They hit him and explode into fragments. Glass flies back at me, but I don’t stop throwing everything I can at him. “You’re a murderer! How can you judge anyone when you’re killing people!”
He shakes his head, “Not people. Sinners.”
I think of my mother. She’s dead and mutilated. Strapped to a chair in the rain and murdered by the man she devoted herself to. She didn’t deserve that.
“They trusted you!” I scream. “I trusted you!”
“And now you’ll reap what you’ve sown.” He comes closer to me. Only a few feet are between us. If I don’t move now, I’ll be trapped in the corner with nowhere to go. There’ll be nothing to stop the man that killed my mom from taking me apart. I won’t let that happen. I refuse to let that happen. I scan the room for a way out and I see the gun. It fell beside the bed. The Reaper comes forward again. The bed is to his left and the next step he takes will bring him past the bed. Once he does, he’ll see the gun that’s laying just out of sight.
