When the Smoke Clears, page 33
She rubbed her wrists, soothing psychological aches before adjusting her dress sleeves to cover half-healed scars. In five days, her skin had healed better than expected from the damage done by the zip ties, but her heart had not. Of everything she endured that day, Brenden still not being in love with her hurt the worst.
“They’ll heal. Give it time,” Joan spoke just above a whisper.
“What if it doesn’t?” Paige peeked over to her mother-in-law, admiring the poise the socialite possessed after all they had been through the last week. “What if it remains ugly and discolored, reminding me of what used to be beautiful?” Paige tugged at the sleeve of her dress once more.
Joan blinked. She began fiddling with her wedding band. “I won’t insult you by continuing to glaze over the obvious. I know things have been strained between you and Brenden since he woke from the coma. At least we got the Ethics Committee to drop their inquiry.
“However, I’m still upset with Robert for making Brenden leave after he found you. You needed him just as much as his men. That’s the only reason Robert explained everything to you and me.” Her chest puffed up, then slowly fell. “He knows you and Brenden have been through a lot. You two need time to get back to where you were.”
Paige bit her lip. Knots rolled around inside her belly. They didn’t have a lot of time. Not since learning she was pregnant again while being examined after the rescue. “I couldn’t have lived with myself had he not gone.”
They exchanged a glimpse of understanding, then rode in silence until Marvin stopped the car. Paige twiddled her thumbs while waiting for the Jasper family’s beloved chauffeur to open her door. She pasted on a party smile and prepared herself to graciously entertain all in attendance for the dedication of the new art wing and art therapy center. After all, it was her husband’s generosity that allowed the university to break ground, and people were eagerly anticipating them.
Except, there was no them. She was alone. Flying solo to an event where Brenden should’ve been at her side had become her unacceptable norm.
“Milady.” There was no mistaking the rich southern tenor jumpstarting her heart. Paige whipped her head to the open door, then reached out and seized the hand Brenden offered. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered, bringing her in to his chest.
Brenden held her the way he did the night they first danced as man and wife. So much had changed since then, except for the way she loved him. She looked into his eyes and watched the galaxy explode, wishing she was once again the center of his universe. A hint of her wish came true as he lifted and caressed her knuckles with his lips. His eyes closed while his lips lingered against her hand.
In this moment, her heart couldn’t resist willing his to be one with hers. God, she would risk it all to have his love again.
“Brenden,” she gasped, savoring the sexiness he commanded in a tailored suit with no tie. His hooded gaze sparked desire, making her body tremble as heat flooded her cheeks. The constant craving she had for him almost spiraled out of control. “I didn’t expect you to make it.”
“I wrote a check for seven million dollars and my parents matched it. How could I not be here?”
“Because…” A sharp ache entered her chest. Of course that was why he was here. Forget the promise he’d made. Nothing had changed. “Because you left.”
“I’m sorry.” His large hands framed her face. “I know you think I shouldn’t have left. Truth is, I’d do it again if it meant you would see no harm.”
“I know.”
A second, maybe two, passed before his hands slid from her face and interlocked with her fingers. “We have a lot to talk about. For now, I want us to try to enjoy the night.” Paige squeezed his hand. “Good. I have a surprise for you.” His lips twisted in that panty-combusting way.
She smiled back. She had one for him as well. But was it too soon?
“Are you two coming?” Joan came to their sides, giving them the be-good-kids stare.
Brenden nodded then rested his hand on the small of Paige’s back. He ushered her forward, following his mother. As they walked up the entry, his hand wrapped around her waist. Butterflies fluttered to life, stirring nostalgic thoughts of the way they had been before the coma.
A pained smile passed over her lips. Memories of them dancing in the street, sailing, saying “I do”—the moments in love that had led them to this point would forever burden her heart until Brenden remembered.
“Smile, Nichols,” Brenden murmured, pulling her back into the evening. “They want our picture.” Paige smiled, melding into his hold. His fingers maintained a constant caress. As they posed and issued gratuitous statements of the night’s event, she couldn’t shake how different he seemed tonight. But then, there had been a strange look in his eyes ever since he found her in that old warehouse. “Through here.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her inside the lobby.
As if on cue, her entire body went stiff. The irises of her eyes became cloudy. Paige swallowed hard, looked to Brenden, and then back in front of her at the building’s greeting wall.
“Emeline Jasper College of Fine Arts,” Paige read, choking over tears as she walked forward. She reached out, allowing her fingertips to graze the wall mural she had painted in their daughter’s room. Her eyes closed. She couldn’t help recounting the happiness she had experienced while painting Emeline’s nursery.
“The mural was the one time you painted when you weren’t sad.” Brenden’s hand cupped her shoulder.
“Yes.” Paige met his gaze with a smile.
…
The twinkle in her brown eyes made his heart sing. No longer would he play second fiddle to an ancient oath. Not when a part of him was lonely and thirsting for her love. Paige was the only woman who had stolen his heart, and he didn’t want it back. She had to be the one to hold his love until the very end of time.
“Are you upset?” He held his breath, hoping he had done this right.
“No.” Paige shook her head. “When—how’d you get this here?”
“Those details are unimportant. I just knew we couldn’t keep the door to Emeline’s room closed forever, and painting over the mural wasn’t an option. I don’t want the inspiration our little girl filled you with to leave with her passing. I dedicated this building to the happiness that inspired you to paint without being sad, and that was our daughter.” His hands slid inside his pockets as a smile spread across his face. “Emeline allowed you to create an enchanted land full of fairies, unicorns, and—”
“Love.” Her beautiful eyes scorched him in a way that set his soul on fire before her attention returned to the mural.
Brenden watched Paige walk the length of it, tracing her fingertips over little flowers. The rest of his life flashed before him. He envisioned her belly swollen from carrying his child while bouncing another in her arms, family picnics, graduations, and weddings. There were so many hopes and dreams still left to come true, and Paige was the only one who could make them reality.
“What are you thinking about?” Paige giggled, bumping him with her hip. “Looks serious, Jasper.”
“You, Nichols.” Brenden stared down into her face. “Lately, you’re all I think about.”
“Dr. Jasper,” a woman called while making her way toward them, but Paige didn’t pull away from his gaze. “Oh, hello, Mr. Jasper, pleasure to meet you.” Brenden extended his hand and greeted the woman, releasing Paige from his magnetic hold. “Paige Jasper, the faculty was not aware you painted so…so…”
“Beautifully,” Brenden offered, never taking his eyes off the beauty who had captivated him many moons ago on New Year’s Eve.
“Yes, exactly! This mural is all everyone is talking about. After seeing your painting, the art therapy center, and reading your research, it all makes sense why Connie and McPherson want you as Dean of Fine Arts.”
Paige cut off eye contact with the woman and peered down at her feet. Brenden knew the bittersweet battle his wife fought with art, but he could not save her from this.
“Honestly, Beth.” Paige held her breath for a second, looked at Brenden, and then focused back on her colleague. “Until I arrived here tonight, my mind was dead set against becoming dean. But my husband reminded me that I found peace with a gift I can nurture in others.” She huffed a chuckle. “Connie and McPherson will get their wish.”
A wide, contagious smile took over Beth’s face. “Don’t you move! Connie needs to hear you say this. I’ll be right back.” The woman clapped her hands with giddy delight and took off.
Paige turned her attention back to the greeting wall. “You’re all I think about, too, Brenden,” she said just above a whisper.
Brenden swallowed hard. He closed the gap between them, fingering a stray hair from her face. The blush staining her cheeks stirred a chaotic rhythm within his heart and let him know she was still his. “You deserve more than half of the man I’ve given you since returning home.”
“Brenden—”
“If memory serves correctly, I once told you that the ocean is infinite and my love for you is the same. Even when my mind failed me, my heart knew.” Her caged heart burst with love at his confession. His hand cupped the side of her face and she melted into it. “Don’t cry, Nichols.”
“You remember,” she sniffled, eyes becoming bright.
He nodded and then allowed words to flow from him as he opened up and explained how suppressing his memories of Daniel’s death blocked his memories of their life together. Shackles fell from his heart. Now, it was his turn to remind Paige that he had surrendered his heart to her and his duty was to love and protect her forever.
“I love you, Nichols.” Their foreheads pressed together. He inhaled her sweet scent while relishing the touch that made him whole. “I’ve loved you every moment of every day.”
“Always and forever,” she spoke, breathless. “I love you. And, you should know there will be more of me to love.” Brenden searched her face for understanding. “At the hospital when they were checking me out after you found me, they discovered that I am expecting.”
He stepped closer and placed his hand upon her belly. “You make all of my wildest dreams come true.”
For a second, time stood still. Brenden’s eyes searched the depths of her soul as his fingers threaded her hair. His lips crashed down to hers, demanding all of her affections. Their tongues danced a searing waltz until their hearts rejoiced, beating as one, because the smoke had finally cleared.
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Acknowledgments
This is just the beginning of a journey I hope to be long and rewarding. I did not get here alone, and so I must take time to acknowledge those who have built a bridge for me to cross and bring love stories to the world.
To the one who sits high and looks low, thank you God for this gift, the many blessings, and opened doors. To Mark, my love—you make it all possible. I couldn’t do this life without you. To my heartbeats, Amari and Bryce, your love and understanding of writing days is the sweetest gift to me. To my mother, Matt, you introduced me to Romance with that old Turner Classic Three Coins in a Fountain. I’ve been addicted to HEAs since. To my daddy, sport, you gave me the sounds of Gato and many more jazz musicians that now live on my writing playlist inspiring my creativity. To my sister, Assunta, you keep me believing I can do anything. To my brother, Horace, who speaks to me from heaven and tells me to get my ass up and write—I miss you. To Shaunte, my ride or die. To JaNiece, my real life Bellamy, never be surprised if it’s in the book. To Laurel Cremant and Diana Neal, your love, support, and friendship means so much—one day we will break Laurel out of the early AM texts. To LaQuette and Xyla Turner, my soul sistahs, whenever I call, you’re there ready and willing to back me up at the drop of a dime no questions. Thank you all for always being there for me. Your love and support have meant so much over the years.
To my agent, the fabulous Latoya Smith, you put all the sparkle in Black Girl Magic! Thank you for taking a chance and believing in me. Looking forward to what comes next.
To Stacy Abrams, editor extraordinaire, thank you for your open mind and willingness to challenge the status quo so that we can elevate Black Heroines in Romantic Fiction.
To Liz Pelletier, who genuinely believes #OWNVOICES matter, you rock and so do all the things you’re doing to create opportunities for authors who look like me.
To the entire Entangled team that has been so welcoming and supportive of this project, thank you.
To CIMRWA, you are the reason I am here. Thank you for being a safe space for authors of color.
To the beautifully talented women writing romance featuring Black Heroines and Heroes—Keep writing! The world deserves to see our excellence as we defy stereotypes and show that everyone is worthy of a Happily Ever After.
To my readers, thank you. I hope you enjoyed this book. There are more stories to tell, and I hope you’ll enjoy those as well.
About the Author
C. Chilove is a southern girl writing sexy, thought-provoking romance that explores the human condition while proving love transcends societal clichés. Her characters are strong, witty, and prove that diversity is beautiful. When she’s not writing, she’s living out her personal happily-ever-after by rockin’ the stands for her Volleyball star, cheering on her future MLB slugger, or celebrating date night with her hubby. Find C. Chilove on her website: CChilove.com, Twitter (@CChiloveWrites), Instagram (@C_Chilove).
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C. Chilove, When the Smoke Clears
