Once Upon A Grump, page 12
The only somewhat good news was that I’d slowly but surely been managing to put together deals and repair our reputation with some former clients. It meant I was on the phone more than I liked and kissing far more ass than I ever preferred, but I was seeing the number of accounts we represented growing by the day. Our numbers for this quarter were on track to be up by six percent, and even Trisha Frost wouldn’t be able to argue with the quality of my leadership.
But fucking Lola was always lurking in the back of my mind. Even when I was on track to get the things I thought I wanted, I still knew I’d made a mess of things with her. I halfway expected the twenty-thousand-dollar bonus I sent yesterday to arrive back in my mail on fire with a “Fuck you” note attached. I was relieved to see she’d deposited the money, though, and hoped she was enjoying it.
I had no ill-will towards Lola. That was actually the problem. I wanted her to be happy. I wanted her to enjoy her life here. Even if that meant dating some other asshole from town or work…
I grimaced and shook my head as the thought skidded across my mind. No. That was a fucking lie. I wanted Lola to live a long, happy, sexless life of chastity and for her to remain happily single. Why? Because I was a selfish asshole and I wanted her for myself, even if I knew I couldn’t have her. And if I couldn’t have her, I didn’t want anyone else enjoying those soft curves.
I tried to distract myself with the numbers on one of our new accounts. In the early days, that had always been my refuge. There was peace when I was completely immersed in the numbers and the finances. There were rules to numbers that made sense and never changed. I knew what to expect when I was in a spreadsheet, and I knew how to make the numbers do exactly what I wanted.
But fucking people? They followed no rules. They were chaotic and irritating and always making me feel like the world’s biggest idiot. It was why I’d decided I was better off interacting with them as little as possible. My sleepless nights made that a hell of a lot easier, since I was often too grouchy and sleep-deprived to force my way through small talk or pleasantries. People quickly learned to avoid me at all costs. I growled and glared, then they ran.
Except Lola hadn’t been like the rest. She’d given it back to me better than I gave it. Even she had her limits, though. I was enough of an asshole last time that she was finally like all the other ones. She was doing everything in her power to avoid me. She wasn’t even cheekily waving and smiling at the cameras anymore–which I knew because I was pathetic and I’d gone back to checking in on them from time to time.
I sighed and rocked back in my chair. A new email came to my inbox and I read it, frowning. My secretary had forwarded an invitation to tonight’s Fairhope marshmallow roast. Apparently, the whole town would be there, including most of my employees. My secretary thought it would be good for company morale if I made an appearance.
I grinned humorlessly. She was in her late seventies and too old and sweet to realize my appearance would have the opposite effect. Still, I couldn’t help picturing Lola showing up and that asshole Chase finding her. I imagined the two of them sitting thigh to thigh with marshmallows dangling on sticks, laughing as they ate. Chase would probably pull some corny move like telling her she had something on her lip and lean in to get it with his thumb, then they’d kiss, and–
I fired off an email before I could think.
I’ll be there.
C. Stone
23
LOLA
No matter how hot the days were in Colorado, the low humidity meant they cooled off to a pleasant, if not slightly too cold, temperature when the sun set. I had on jeans and a flirty crop top as I walked from my apartment to the town square. Avoiding Mr. Stone had been a great decision.
Instead of going home with conflicting feelings almost every day, I was able to just enjoy my new life here. Yes, I was still avoiding everybody from New York who was trying to get in touch, but I had promised myself I’d get to all that soon. Most of them just wanted to tell me what a scumbag I was, anyway, and I figured there was no real sensitive time horizon for that. I did feel guilty about my best friend, Kate. I knew she was pissed too, but for different reasons than the rest of them. I’d actually sent her a text trying my best to explain that I was going to be off the grid for a few weeks and I promised she’d be the first one I got back to when I was ready. Of course, I’d been too much of a coward to look and see what she said in reply.
Fairhope’s town square was buzzing with activity. It was positioned in a partly grassy open field beside the river and an adorable little stone bridge. Some buildings from Main Street were positioned opposite the bridge and a few locals had set up picnic tables with free food and sweets.
I spotted Old Mr. Ashford with the two little kids who watched Termite, Molly and Billy. Molly was seven and Billy was ten. I’d briefly met their stepmom, Harper, so I recognized her where she was standing with a baby in her arms as she spoke with Mr. Ashford. There was a spread of delicious looking baked goods in front of her on the table.
Harper was in her early twenties, ridiculously pretty, and was making it look like being a mom of a newborn with two stepkids all while running her own restaurant was easy. Meanwhile, I could barely keep my one dog happy.
“Hey guys!” I said, letting Termite rush up to wag her little tail as she stood on Molly and Billy’s legs, trying desperately to lick their faces.
They laughed and asked if they could watch her for a while. I handed over the leash and the two of them ran off towards the river. As I was watching, a cute girl about Billy’s age jogged to catch up with them, punching him on the shoulder when she caught up. She clutched her hands in front of her, clearly shy as she smiled adorably. Billy smiled at her and said something I couldn’t hear, then both of their cheeks went red.
“That is so freaking cute,” I breathed.
Harper laughed. Her baby was grunting and making cute baby noises on her shoulder as she bounced it. “I know. They’ve had a crush on each other for like a year now, but I don’t think they’re old enough for Billy to think it’s cool to officially like a girl. He’s still pretending he doesn’t care.”
“Boys are stupid,” I said with a little more angst than I’d intended.
Harper laughed, looking surprised. “Are you having boy trouble, Lola?”
We were interrupted when a tall, athletic man in his thirties strode up to the table. He grabbed a cheese danish, took a bite, and smiled at Harper. “Hey, want me to take her?” He asked. She looked a little reluctant, but she smiled and handed over the little baby in her light pink onesie covered in cartoon koalas.
I looked after the man as he left. “That is your husband?” I whispered.
Harper laughed. “I know, right? I got lucky.”
I tried not to gawk as the man left, forcing myself to look back at Harper and not make some kind of creepy comment. The man was a picture of small-town perfection from his baseball cap to the stubble on his gorgeous face.
“Mind telling me how you find the pretty ones that are nice, too? All the pretty ones I find seem to be major assholes.”
Harper laughed. “Actually, Greyson wasn’t the nicest at first. I like to think he was a lot like a stubborn batch of dough. It took a lot of kneading, some punching, some swear words, maybe even a few tears. But eventually, with enough work, I got him softened up.”
I grinned. “How’d you know he was worth the work?” I cringed a little internally. I knew exactly why I was asking and I hated myself a little for it.
“I didn’t,” Harper said with a shrug. “But I didn’t seem to be able to help myself from continuing to try. Maybe that was the secret sauce. Even when we fought, it was like we couldn’t stay away from each other. And if you’re going to be magnetically drawn to someone, I guess you’re better off finding out a way to get along. And have mind-blowing sex,” she added with a big smirk.
I laughed. I liked this girl. She seemed so young to have three kids and a husband, but I had to remember the older two were inherited. I wondered what the story was with Greyson and their biological mother but knew better than to be nosy and ask.
“Well, if I was into social media I’d take a picture of you and do some kind of hashtag goals thing,” I said.
Harper smiled in the direction of Greyson, who was scooping up two hotdogs in one hand and trying to get a bite of both while holding the baby in his other hand. There was so much affection in her eyes as she watched them that I almost couldn’t take it.
Was I ever going to find a guy I’d look at like that?
Three women appeared and started talking to Harper almost like I wasn’t there. I missed most of the conversation because it was a flurry of noise, but I picked up the names Gabby, Farrah, and Lin. Lin–the one with dark hair and upturned eyes, showed a weirdly photoshopped picture of an attractive guy’s head stuck on a baby’s body while it was riding a pig. The women all laughed, then Harper saved me the awkwardness and explained.
“It’s Kenny Mathers. The musician. Lin likes to photoshop him into compromising positions and text it to our group chat.”
“Oh,” I said, smiling. That’s a little weird. “Did you two have some kind of troubled history? Or are you just a fan?”
Lin shot me a look that told me one of my two guesses was wildly offensive. “Kenny Mathers can suck a dick and die.”
The women all tried and failed to hold back smiles as they watched me.
“Oh,” I said again. “Well, the photoshop work is really excellent. It looks like he was born with that baby’s body.”
This seemed to be a better approach and Lin smiled proudly. She turned the phone toward me and pointed behind his head. “His hair was really hard to cut out there. I had to manually paint in some strays to make it look more natural over the background. I also had to blend his neck with the baby’s, which was a lot harder than you’d think.”
I smiled but couldn’t help thinking this level of obsessive hatred seemed a little unhealthy.
I was saved when Paisley, Cassie, and Chase from work all walked up to the town square together. Cassie spotted me and cupped her hands to yell, “Yo, Thorny! Get ova’ here!” She was using a bad fake New Yorker accent for some reason, and the way she was stumbling made me suspect she had pre-gamed a little too hard for this.
“Sorry, it was really nice to meet all of you,” I said. “Can you let Billy and Molly know they can bring Termite to me whenever they’re done? I don’t want them feeling like they are supposed to watch her all night.”
“Oh trust me, they are happy to watch her as long as you’ll let them. You may have to drag that leash out of their hands when you’re ready to go.”
I smiled and waved, leaving the women to go back to laughing at the image on Lin’s phone.
“Making new friends?” Paisley asked when I joined them. They were taking up places around one of a few fire pits that had been set up around the square. Folding lawn chairs were stacked by the buildings and Chase returned with four under his arms. We all unfolded a chair and circled the fire pit.
“That’s the mom of the kids who watch Termite when I’m at work,” I said.
“She seems young,” Chase noted. “Teen pregnancy?”
“Billy and Molly are ten and seven. They’re her stepkids, but that baby is her biological child.”
“Ah, okay,” Chase said. “I’m glad you made it out.” He smiled broadly at me and even reached over to give my forearm a little squeeze.
I blushed, smiling back at him and feeling weirdly guilty about the little moment. Cassie and Paisley shared a look, then watched me with annoying closeness.
Part of me wanted to flirt my ass off with Chase tonight just to get the taste of Mr. Stone out of my system. There was nothing there. Nothing official. I shouldn’t need to feel guilty or weird about liking another guy, if that was what I chose to do. But Mr. Stone’s stupid face kept floating in my brain every time I tried to convince myself it wouldn’t be so bad to date Chase.
We spent the next hour or so talking and laughing. Cassie told us her latest fitness scheme, which involved climbing for two hours a night after work and eating nothing but fish and vegetables–cooked fish, this time. Paisley explained how she’d had the date from hell the previous night because the guy had some weird belief that all electronic devices were mildly toxic. He had insisted that she leave her phone in her car and they’d had to eat on the outdoor patio of the restaurant, freezing their asses off because he wouldn’t let the waitress turn on the electric heater. Chase spent a good while explaining how he had started a band for fun with some guys from work and promised he’d bring CDs for all of us later.
It all felt so normal and good. We had a fire roaring between us, casting our smiling faces in warm, orange light. The sounds of conversation and laughter filled the night in every direction. Behind us, the stream burbled calmly and the voices of children playing and splashing in the cool water never completely faded. I’d occasionally hear Termite bark as she worriedly paced the shore, watching the latest kid who was plunging in and swimming to touch the pillars of the bridge.
It felt like a dream I didn’t deserve, like I’d somehow swooped into this fairytale town and stole somebody else’s perfect life. Hell, my apartment didn’t even smell like the Tinkerbells anymore. Mr. Stone’s people had thoroughly seen to that. I even had twenty-thousand fresh dollars sitting in my bank account, seductively whispering in my ear that everything would be okay every time I checked my phone.
So why did I still feel this nagging sense of unease? Why did it still feel like something wasn’t right?
I’d zoned out while Chase was explaining some issue he had with his guitarist. My eyes were unfocused, and I was looking off into the darkness toward the bridge. That was when I saw him. Tall, dark, and shadowed from where he stood away from any of the fires. He was leaning on the bridge and looking straight toward me.
Mr. Stone was here, and he was watching me. I felt suddenly aware and self-conscious of the fact that Chase had at some point scooted his chair closer to mine. Our legs were almost touching. Like a kid caught by her dad, I cleared my throat and lifted my chair, scooting a few inches away. I immediately felt silly and wished I hadn’t.
Chase trailed off and looked toward me. “Everything okay?”
“Oh, yeah. I just kept getting hit by sparks there. I was trying to dodge them.”
“Ah,” Chase smiled and lifted his chair, scooting it closer again. “Yeah, some were hitting me too.”
I didn’t miss the meaningful look Paisley gave me. Cassie was getting ridiculously drunk for some reason and was too plastered to notice. She was leaned back in her chair, eyes partly unfocused and mouth hanging open. Every once in a while, she’d jerk her head upright, smile, and act like she knew what was going on.
“Actually,” I said. “I really have to pee. I’ll be back.”
I got up and rushed away before Chase or Paisley could say anything. I headed for the nearest building, which was some kind of bakery that had its front door propped open even though nobody was inside. I wanted to see if Christian was following me, but I stayed strong and didn’t look over my shoulder the whole way.
Once I had the bathroom door inside the bakery closed, I let out a long breath and sighed. I silently decided to make a deal with the universe. If Christian was out there when I finished, I was going to tell him exactly how I felt, even if I didn’t know how that was. If he wasn’t out there, then it meant I needed to move the hell on and take the unspoken offer Chase was making.
Maybe I hadn’t planned on a relationship when I came out here, but it seemed like the only way I was going to keep my sanity was either embracing normalcy and dating Chase or taking a step into insanity by seeing where things might lead with Mr. Stone.
I finished up, put my hands on the door, and pushed it open.
24
CHRISTIAN
“What are you doing?” I breathed. Internally, I winced. I knew I was about to make things worse with her. That seemed to be all I was capable of.
“I was peeing,” Lola said. Her cheeks were still rosy from the chill outside, and her hair was wind-tossled. She looked fucking gorgeous, especially in that simple pair of blue jeans and flirty cropped top she wore. “Sometimes, I do that.”
She folded her arms, watching me as if knowing I was going to have to marinate in how stupid my question had been. Once she was satisfied, she grinned. “Let me guess. You chased me in here because you were pissed that I was sitting by Chase, right? Well, let me spoil it for you. I don’t want to date Chase. I don’t want to date anyone. I still haven’t tied up the loose ends from the life I left behind. The last thing I want or need is to complicate my life here with a relationship.”
I let out a sigh of relief.
She shook her head at me. “Why don’t you just come out and say it, Mr. Stone? It’s pretty obvious.”
I stared. There was no point in playing stupid. We both knew what she meant. I chose my words carefully, speaking as calmly as I could. “You have your reasons for not wanting a relationship, and I have mine.”
“If you don’t want to be with me, why can’t you stop trying to police my vagina?”
I felt my lips twitch in the threat of a smile. “You haunt me. That’s why.” I was breathing harder now–the words rushing out faster than I could stop them. “I see you when I close my eyes. I dream of you when I sleep. I can’t fucking get you out of my head, but I can’t afford to let myself have you.”
Lola’s eyebrows drew together. She swallowed, then took a careful step closer to me. “It’s possible I might know a little bit about that feeling.”
Our eyes locked and I found myself finishing what she’d started. I stood mere inches from her, towering over her until I had to bend my neck to keep my eyes on hers.
