Confessions of Lady Tabitha, page 18
A tiny frown appeared between Tabitha’s forehead as she considered something she had never thought about before. She had never asked about Jeremy’s family. The man had worked on the estate for seven years, yet she barely knew anything about his personal life. What kind of a person was she?
“What is wrong, My Lady?” Jeremy enquired.
“I do not think I am a good person. In fact, I know it.”
“Why would you say such a thing?”
“How long have you been with my family, Jeremy?” she asked him.
“Seven, going on eight years, My Lady.”
“Precisely. You know so much about my family and me, but I do not know much about yours. What kind of person does that make me?”
Jeremy tilted his head, smiling. “Why would you need to ask about my family? I am here to serve you and your family, not talk about mine.”
Tabitha shook her head. “You do not understand. You’re risking your life for me, and I do not even know much about your life. What really are you risking, Jeremy? Do you have a family that depends on your salary? Will they be affected once people find out what we’ve done?”
The more Tabitha asked questions, the worse she felt about the situation. Goodness, but she had been thinking so selfishly all this time! Assuming she was the only one who stood to lose much was one of the most foolish things to have ever crossed her mind.
“Do not fret, My Lady,” Jeremy urged. “I am not doing anything that I do not wish to do. My family understands that I am a man of honour and will only do what is necessary. It is not for you to worry about me.”
“How can you say that? Are you not a person like me? Once you remove our class difference, you will find that nothing separates us. We’re just the same.”
As soon as she had said that, Tabitha realised just how true her words were. What was the only dividing line between her and Jeremy but the fact she was born a duke’s daughter? Jeremy had proven himself to be better than the titled people she knew, and yet he was considered a secondary citizen because he lacked a title. It was ludicrous!
“That difference is not a line, but an ocean, My Lady. I taste the truth in your words, but I beg you not to repeat them again. People do not take kindly to such words and will consider it a revolt. People have died for less.”
“Sometimes a revolt is needed,” Tabitha insisted.
“But let it be elsewhere,” Jeremy said gently. “We have enough worries of our own without bringing the nation into it. Shall I meet you in an hour?
Tabitha wished to argue the point further but saw no purpose in it. Jeremy preferred to hold on to their old ways rather than consider something that would make them equal. It disappointed her more than Tabitha thought was necessary.
“Yes. An hour is fine.”
She turned away, uttering a little gasp when Jeremy touched her arm with the tips of his fingers. He quickly snatched his hand away, staring at her in horror.
“F-forgive me, My Lady,” he stuttered. “Forgive me, please. I overstepped.”
Tabitha longed to smooth her hand over the tingling area but didn’t want Jeremy to feel any worse.
“’Tis nothing, Jeremy. Did you want to say something?”
His brow puckered as he looked away. “I … I do not know. I think I should leave. Please excuse me, My Lady.”
Jeremy took off before Tabitha could say anything else. What on earth had got into him? He wasn’t one to overstep himself or take advantage of a woman, so why did he seem so horrified?
“He probably wanted to gain my attention and touched me without thinking about it,” she told herself.
That was no reason to overreact, but perhaps it was for him. Hopefully, this silly moment wouldn’t impact their time in the conservatory. Tabitha wanted to find out how their plan was going and hoped Jeremy had an update. She knew that it had only been a day since they last spoke, but she had been reduced to needing an update every day. Also, it wouldn’t hurt to spend a little time with Jeremy.
He always managed to set her mind at ease and give her hope. Who would not want a person like that around them?
Tabitha returned to the house to search for Mandee. She would need someone in the conservatory with her to maintain propriety, but Tabitha hoped the woman wouldn’t get too involved. The plan was still between her and Jeremy as she wasn’t confident about how Mandee would react to it. Tabitha knew the woman wanted the best for her, but sometimes they had different ideas about what was best.
Tabitha found the woman sorting out gowns, her look of concentration almost silencing Tabitha’s footsteps into the room. Mandee only turned when Tabitha was nearly upon her, jumping back with a gasp.
“Tabitha!”
Grinning, Tabitha threw herself on her bed, ignoring the gowns. “What on earth are you doing?”
“I could ask you the same thing,” Mandee returned. “Get off those gowns before you wrinkle them.”
“Why are you fiddling with them?”
“Your mother asked me to go through them and note any missing ones. I heard what you did, and I disapprove. You’re digging yourself a hole.”
Mandee really did not look impressed. Tabitha sat up and crossed her legs, pushing the gowns away from her.
“Are you angry with me?”
“What do you think? You seem to be keeping far too many secrets from me, Tabitha. How am I supposed to help you if you won’t tell me anything?”
When Tabitha realised her friend was more hurt than angry, she slid off the bed to embrace Mandee.
“I’m sorry, Mandee. I didn’t mean to keep things from you. I just thought that the fewer people that know about it, the better.”
Mandee pulled away and busied herself with returning the gowns. “I’m not just people, or does our friendship mean nothing to you?”
“Of course, it does. Look at it as my way of protecting you. You could honestly say that you had nothing to do with it.”
“I’m not the one who needs protection,” Mandee insisted, sighing as she put down the dress she was holding. “I’m worried about you, Tabitha. Don’t you understand? I feel that you’re making everything much worse.”
Tabitha wanted to tell the woman that there was nothing to worry about, but Mandee would want to know why she had such confidence.
“I feel there is still hope, so don’t despair. Your frown will curdle all the milk in the house.”
Mandee shook her head. “Still jesting at such a time. What am I going to do with you?”
“Sit with me in the conservatory while Jeremy teaches me about the flowers and plants I should have? I asked him to give me advice on how I should transform the conservatory into something that looks like paradise.”
Interest sparked in the woman’s eyes. “Oh? When?”
“Less than an hour. Take a book with you because I might take a while discussing plans with him.”
Except the plans had nothing to do with the conservatory.
“Very well. Allow me to return these gowns, and I’ll ask Mrs Cummings to organise a pot of tea.”
“Good idea!” Tabitha exclaimed. “I’ll help you.”
“Oh, no, no, no,” said Mandee, pulling the dresses away from her. “You’ll only make a mess. Why don’t I meet you in the conservatory? That should give you time to look over the room before Jeremy arrives.”
Tabitha nodded, laughing. “An even better idea. I’ll see you soon.”
Tabitha all but skipped as she left the room, cheerfully greeting all the servants who passed her. Leo stopped her as he came out of the drawing-room, but not even he could dampen her spirits.
“How are you, Tabitha?” he asked.
“Well, thank you. Would you please excuse me?”
“Where are you off to in such a hurry?” the marquess said, ignoring her request.
“The conservatory. I plan to plant a few flowers and plants.”
The marquess smiled. “Already practising to be a good wife, ey?”
Tabitha’s smile died. “I do not have time for small talk, Leo. Please, excuse me?”
She didn’t wait for his answer this time but walked away from him, aware of his eyes boring into her back. What was he thinking? He was a fool if he believed that everything revolved around marrying him. Tabitha could just imagine the surprise on his face the day she finally escaped. Tabitha was going to enjoy thwarting his plans.
***
A little later, Jeremy and Tabitha stood off to one corner over a dying plant as they discussed her escape route. Her eyes kept darting to Mandee, hoping that the woman couldn’t hear anything being said. The woman appeared engrossed in her book, but Tabitha knew her friend could pretend to do one thing while doing another.
“The kitchen will be the safest place,” said Jeremy under his voice. “We will meet there.”
“Are you certain no one will see us?”
“How can they when it’s supposed to be shut for the night? Once the scullery maids finish the dinner dishes, you’ll be able to sneak down and wait for me.”
This sounded so risky to Tabitha’s ears, but she believed Jeremy. If he said it would work, then it would.
“How will we leave the property?” she asked.
“There will be a carriage waiting outside the kitchen door. A good friend of mine is a carriage driver and knows our first destination.”
“He won’t say a word, will he?” said Tabitha.
Jeremy shook his head. “Magnus is a trustworthy man. I’ve never had cause to doubt him.”
Tabitha nodded, taking a deep breath. “Very well. I’m just a little nervous about everything. So much can go wrong.”
“But nothing will,” Jeremy assured her. “If we stick to the plan, everything will go well. Trust me.”
“I do, I do.” Tabitha took on a deep breath and released it slowly. “I better return to Mandee before she becomes too curious and makes her way over here.”
The woman was already darting looks their way but trying not to make it look too obvious. Tabitha touched the plant in front of her, pretending to ask a question about it.
“What are you doing?” Jeremy asked, confused about her miming.
“Follow my lead.”
“Why not just ask me out loud? I do know a thing or two about plants.”
Tabitha laughed, nodding. “Yes, how silly of me. Is this a perennial plant? If not, will it survive any season if I keep it in the conservatory?”
Jeremy answered her question as they walked towards Mandee, who never looked up from her book until Tabitha called to her. Mandee looked up as though surprised and mentioned something about getting ready for dinner. Tabitha considered skipping dinner and spending the rest of her evening talking to Jeremy, but that wouldn’t go down well with her parents.
“Please let me know if you have any more questions, My Lady,” said Jeremy. “I will be in my office for most of the day tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Jeremy. I’ll do just that. Shall we go, Mandee?”
They walked away from him, but Tabitha turned as they got to the door and sent a dazzling smile his way. Jeremy looked surprised for a moment, but he returned it soon after. It was a smile that spoke volumes, promising the freedom that Tabitha so desperately wanted. Now, it was simply a matter of days.
***
Tabitha stared at her potatoes later that evening, regretting the amount of gravy she had put on them. She didn’t usually add so much, but her mind was elsewhere tonight. Shrugging her shoulders, she scooped some of the gloopy brown liquid to the side and cut into a soggy roasted potato.
“May I please have your attention,” said Leo.
Tabitha rolled her eyes and continued to eat until she felt everyone’s eyes on her. Pursing her lips slightly, she put down her utensils and folded her hands on her lap. Why did everyone have to stop eating just because the marquess had something to say? It was ridiculous.
“Go ahead, Leo,” the duke encouraged. “Say what you must.”
“Thank you, Your Grace. I wish to announce that I shall be returning to London soon.”
Tabitha sucked in her breath and blinked hard. Did this mean the wedding would be postponed? Possibly cancelled? She could only hope.
“What do you mean?” her father asked. “Why the sudden change in plans? What about the wedding?”
“Rest assured that I have taken that into consideration, Your Grace,” said Leo. “The wedding will be sooner than planned.”
Tabitha felt her heart drop. This was much worse than she thought. What had made the marquess change his mind? Had Mandee overheard something and informed the marquess?
No, that’s impossible. I know that Mandee doesn’t know a thing about the escape. Something else must have happened.
“Well, I’m glad to hear that the wedding will still take place, but what is the hurry?” the duke enquired. “Are you not enjoying yourself here?”
“To be frank, Your Grace, I am rather bored in the countryside. The London scene is more to my tastes.”
Tabitha had not wanted to sit next to Ellie during dinner, but now she was glad she did, or she would have missed what the woman had to say.
“More so that the duke is broke,” Ellie snickered under her breath. “Storping has gambled everything away.”
Tabitha inwardly groaned. Her father had once again put her in a difficult position.
Chapter 16
Pacing her room like a raving lunatic was not doing Tabitha any good. She needed to get a letter to Jeremy but had no idea how to. What was she going to do? Leaving her bedroom at this time of the night would raise questions, especially with Jeremy’s house being her destination.
“How else am I supposed to tell him about Leo’s decision?” she said under her breath.
Jeremy needed to know because it impacted the night their plan would be put into action. If Tabitha didn’t leave soon, all their careful planning would amount to nothing. She would become the Marchioness of Bazeley, and then there would be nothing that anyone could do about it.
Tabitha paused, putting a hand on her bed as her chest squeezed. She couldn’t marry Leo! That was a life sentence of misery just waiting to happen. Who would save her then? Leo would have every legal right over her and never let her forget it.
“I’ll be forced to deal with Leo and his horrible sister,” Tabitha cried. “How could this have happened?”
Tabitha had heard what Ellie had to say on the matter, but could Leo really be leaving because the duke had no more money to bet? The marquess had come to marry her, not gamble, or was Tabitha wrong about that? Not for the first time, she wondered if someone had overheard her conversations with Jeremy and taken the news back to Leo. Mandee had been the only one close enough to hear anything, but Tabitha wouldn’t believe that her own friend would betray her like this.
The very same woman stepped into the room, her smile faltering when she saw Tabitha’s expression.
“What is it, Tabitha?” Mandee asked. “Why do you look so hopeless?”
“Did you do it?” Tabitha asked, her voice cracking.
