A Surrender Of Hope, page 9
“My hand,” I finish slowly, eyeing the now furious Demon as he completely loses his shit. Hmm, okay, so that's an odd reaction to a hand touch, but this is Nox, so it really shouldn’t surprise me. I’m definitely going to keep the claws puncturing my shoulders to myself if he’s going to act like this. “Um, maybe try to calm down. You look like your head’s about to explode,” I add unhelpfully, watching in awe as the Demon grows before my eyes. Nox has always been a behemoth of a man, standing well over a head taller than me, but when he’s in this form, I get a kink in my neck from trying to look up at him.
Pursing my lips, I wonder what it would be like to scale that broad chest and grab his horns. They’re dark and pointed, and a deadly black glow surrounds them, sending a thrill down my spine.
“Hmm, probably shouldn’t,” I mutter as Nox growls.
“You let him touch you?” he asks, his voice so deep I have a hard time understanding him.
“Let him? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” I practically screech, stepping up to his massive form and going head-to-head with this impossible, infuriating man. “There was no letting that man do anything. He did what he wanted after he killed everyone in my dreams. Then he sunk his damn claws into my shoulders,” I snarl, the pain of those claws is way too fresh in my mind, and I shiver a little at the reminder, “while he tried to attack my mind! Do you really think I would let him do that?”
His only response is a grunt as he steps toward me, crowding me back against the wall. His big hands wrap around my waist as he leans in, staring me down, a challenge lit in his now black eyes. This is Demon Nox, not the protective man I’ve grown to know over the last few months, but the beast who killed Senior Axford and took control of the castle.
“Back off, Nox,” I grind out, my anger growing, as a dark, lingering excitement wiggles back to the surface. His nostrils flare, and I quickly realize I’m way out of my depth here. Shit. How does one calm down a Demon Prince? To get him to go back to the slightly more reasonable version than this weird growling one? I look around and spot a cup of water on Creed's side table. Bingo.
Leaning to my right, I grab the cup of water and fling its contents at Nox’s face, then bite my lip to stifle the giggle that threatens to break loose at the surprised expression now plastered on his dripping wet face.
“Cool it, Demon boy,” I snap as he slowly lets me go, bringing his hands up to wipe at the water running down his face into his thick beard. I nod in satisfaction when I see his shoulders no longer trembling, and it looks like he’s stopped getting taller. His enormous curved horns are still there, but appear slightly smaller than before. “Now we can have a reasonable conversation where you listen and then give me information, or you can leave,” I add, my smug mood slowly fading as Nox’s eyes stayed glued on my face.
He takes a deep breath, then another, before his right eye twitches and claws suddenly spring from his fingertips. Oh fuck. Okay, water didn’t help. I quickly step away from the wall, darting from him and toward the door just as he snarls and holds a hand out.
“Don’t.” The word comes out as a plea more than a command, and something inside me twists, the urge to run… to see if he would chase, suddenly filling my every thought.
Would he be fast enough to catch me before I made it out of the room? Would he be strong enough to keep me here? I shiver, goosebumps racing over my arms as liquid heat pools in my center and I take another slow step toward the door. The air around me feels heated, and my mind is in some kind of haze as my vision narrows in on Lennox. My ears pop and adjust, and the sound of a door slamming downstairs suddenly becomes audible.
“Meyer. You have no idea what you’re doing right now. Please,” he starts to say, but I’m already turning on my heel. The heat in my body burns through my veins like a drug, and the adrenaline makes me feel indestructible as I throw open the door to Creed’s room and try to dash into the hall. Before I can make it even two steps, I’m yanked off my feet by a furious Demon who snarls into my ear, “I let you escape me once. I won't allow it a second time, Little Demon.” Gasping at the raw need in Nox’s voice, I throw an elbow back on instinct, catching him in the ribs and earning a curse as his hold on me only tightens.
“I’m trying to be a good person here, and you’re making that incredibly difficult,” he snaps, his magic flooding my body. Within seconds, I can feel the aches and pains fading away. “I need to heal you, and instead, you try and start a hunting ritual? Do you know how dangerous that can be for you if I don’t control myself?”
The pounding in my head is as loud as my heart thumping in my chest, Nox’s warning only fuels the now painful heat inside me. Cool magic spirals inside me, feeling so much stronger than it ever has before. I breathe out a sigh of relief, not realizing how bad that headache had been until now; the pain slowly lessens, and I momentarily stop fighting his hold, allowing my body to heal. Nox suddenly spins me in his arms, shoves me against the wall, and makes me gasp in surprise as he towers over me, his gleaming eyes locked with mine as he leans closer.
I bring my knee up, trying to nail him between the legs, and Nox’s eyes bulge from his sockets. “Kick me there again, Little Demon, and I’ll put you over my knee,” he warns, making goosebumps erupt over my skin.
Like… as in spank me? Is that what he means? Shit, why does that idea only turn me on and make me want to test his limits? See if he really will make good on his threat.
“Lennox, if you spank me, I will have Razar teach me the most painful way to castrate you,” I snap, not wanting him to know how much I actually like the idea. My hands move to press against his firm chest as he closes his eyes and groans, his head ticking to the side in an almost animalistic way. His enormous wings unfold behind him, catching my attention as they take up the majority of the room. “Can I touch them?” I look at the black leather-like wings, wondering if they would be soft or rough under my fingertips.
“No,” he grinds out, the word clipped like it physically pains him to say. I feel a shift of magic against my skin. In seconds, the wings and horns are gone, but his clawed hands still hold me in place, keeping me pinned against the wall with his giant body.
I almost feel upset at the loss of the wings and horns, wondering why they can’t stay and why he wouldn’t let me touch them. Why can he touch me, but I can’t touch him?
“Fine,” I say between gritted teeth as I shove at his chest, needing space. I feel like I’m on fire, sweat beading at my temple as my hands shake. “Then let me go!”
“Are you going to run?” he asks, and I nod, knowing lying will be useless since he’ll know. But hell, I really need some space from him. “Then no. I won't be letting you go. We need to talk, and I only have so much control. You run, and not only will I hunt your sweet ass down, but you’ll also end up bent over the nearest flat surface, fucked and owned before you can even process what happened. Do you understand me? I have been trying to keep myself in check, but in true fucking Meyer fashion, you keep poking every damn button I have!”
“I haven't done a damn thing but exist! I tried to leave months ago, but you made me stay! Why are you mad at me?” I ask, more confused than ever. Not only by the whole fucked and owned bit, but how much I really truly want that. Nox’s eyes widen, and he pulls back from me, a flicker of hurt crossing his expression.
“You want to leave?” Nox asks, the growl in his voice lessening as he stares down at me, eyes moving from mine to my lips, then back as he swallows hard. My heart lurches, and I sigh, letting my head hang as I slowly shake my head. “Don’t lie to me,” Nox mutters, sounding almost dejected. “Do you want to leave, Meyer? If I told you, you could walk out that door and leave this place, never coming back to this castle or its inhabitants. Would you go?”
“Would you let me? And don’t lie to me,” I parrot his words back to him, needing to know this answer. Everything has been more than a little confusing between me and Lennox. I’ve found a place with Valen, I feel it as if it was the most natural thing in the world. And even Creed, with our ups and downs, has been one of the most amazing things that has ever happened to me. Being with him is as easy as breathing.
But Nox? There is tension there, an attraction that makes me long to be in his arms one moment, but then he opens his infuriating mouth, and I want to kick him in the balls the next. I already know my answer, but it hinges on whatever he is about to say. Nox’s hands fall from my body as he slowly stands to his full height, which remains taller than normal. His Demon form is still slightly present, and he stares down at me with a look I can’t decipher. There is a long, painful beat of silence where I hold my breath, the nerves in my belly making me feel sick as I wait for his response.
“I don’t know if I could allow you to leave with no protection,” he finally admits, and I frown, unsure if that is a yes or no answer. “But,” he rasps, shaking his head as he tears his eyes away from me with a pained grunt. He looks so conflicted at this moment that I almost feel bad about asking the question. “I would let you go if that’s what you truly wanted, Meyer. You’re not a prisoner here.”
Something inside me finally relaxes, melting some of my resistance toward this man. Is everything okay between us now? No, not even close, but am I willing to stay and work toward something better? Yes, as long as he is actually telling the truth. I have a feeling that Nox and I will never get along the way I do with Creed or Valen, but that's a good thing, right? He challenges me, and pushes me to do new things. Not in a Razar tossing me off the wall way… but in his own protective asshole way. I don’t think I would know what to do if Nox was super sweet and nice. It would throw our whole dynamic off.
Besides, if there is anything I’ve learned from the past few months, it’s that these men may not be perfect, but neither am I. And I’m starting to think that leaving now would be the greatest mistake of my life.
My chest feels a million times lighter at Nox’s words, and I didn’t realize how important his answer was to me until he said it out loud. Nox is still looking away, refusing to meet my eyes, so I step right in front of him, closing the small distance he gave me while he was thinking about his answer. Reaching up, I palm his bearded cheek and force him to look at me. When our eyes meet, an explosion of excitement, nervousness, and arousal courses through me.
“I don’t want to leave, Lennox.” I keep our eyes locked, watching as his eyes flutter shut and a shaky breath breaks from his parted lips. “I want to stay here with Valen… Creed… hell, even Razar, though he might kill me for saying that.” His big hands dart out, wrapping around my waist, fingers digging into my sides as he slowly pulls me closer to him. He leans the cheek I have cupped in my hand further into my hold, an almost purr of contentment sounding from his chest. He ducks his head closer to mine, bringing with him the masculine scent of sandalwood and smoke as my toes curl against the cold wood of the floor.
“And you, Lennox Regalis,” I manage to whisper just as he groans, his lips slamming to mine in a bruising kiss, stealing the breath from my lungs.
NINE
Meyer
Our mouths collide in a fierce, demanding kiss, making my heart skip a beat and stealing all logical thought with it. Lennox tugs on my hair, a painful pleasure lighting my scalp as he tilts my head to the side, making me moan into his mouth. Our tongues tangle together as his hands run up my back and weave themselves into my hair as he holds me to him, not granting me even a centimeter of space.
“Meyer.” Nox’s teeth graze my bottom lip as he pulls back for a moment, only to slam his lips back on mine with a growl, lighting up every inch of my body. He dominates our kiss, working my body and setting me on fire as he walks me backward until I’m pressed into the wall with his body crushed to mine. One hand moves from my hair and gently wraps around my neck as he continues to kiss me breathless, moaning into my mouth when I gently bite his lower lip. “Fuck, wait,” he gasps, trying to draw back, but fuck that! I’m about two seconds away from losing my ever-loving mind. I’m so worked up and in need of release. No, not release; I need more than that. I need Lennox in a deep, raw, and primal way I’ve never felt before.
“No,” I growl back, stretching up on my toes, grabbing a fistful of his hair as I kiss him back with everything I have. He curses again, then kisses me back, my body heats, and my back arches to get closer to him, needing that contact. A pained whimper escapes my lips as I claw at every inch of him I can get my hands on.
“I’ve got you, Little Demon,” he whispers against my mouth like he knows the pain I’m in as he presses his knee between my thighs. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I cling to him as his hands grip my ass, lifting me so I can cradle his big frame with my body. I wrap my legs around his hips and let my hands run over his broad shoulders before moving them into his long, black hair. Lennox hums in approval, rolling his hips and grinding his erection against my bare, soaking-wet pussy, making me writhe against him.
“More.” I moan as one of his hands moves to collar my neck, growling into my mouth when I gently bite his lower lip.
“We need to talk first, Meyer. I had to… Shit, I had to bind you to me,” he says between kisses, and I nod, my mind slow to understand his words. “I had to in order to bring you back,” he continues, tearing his lips from mine and trailing hot kisses down my neck to my shoulder, where he inhales and groans, his teeth scraping against the delicate skin there.
I gasp, my head falling back against the wall as Nox keeps kissing and nipping at my heated flesh. “What, what does that mean?” I manage to get out as my mind tries to keep up with this conversation.
“That you’re mine. That if we keep going down this road, there is no going back,” he says with a possessive snarl, making my toes curl. God, yes. That sounds so good.
“Okay,” I agree mindlessly, and Nox curses and tries to pull back. “No!” I shout, clinging to him and rolling my hips against his hard length that’s pressed against me.
“Dammit! You’re not listening, and I refuse to do this unless you truly want it,” he murmurs, pulling back enough for me to look into his eyes.
“I do. I want this,” I admit, my cheeks flaming when he arches a brow.
“How long?” he suddenly asks.
“What?” I gasp as he hitches me further up like he’s afraid I might run if he doesn’t hold me tight.
“How long have you wanted this, Meyer? Just now, since you’ve woken up or…”
“Or!” I cut him off with a nod, hooking my arms around his neck and yanking him back to me, frustrated that he stopped.
“Answer the fucking question,” Nox whispers against my lips, kissing me back with as much, if not more, desperation than me. “How damn long!? I need to know I’m not taking this choice from you.”
My brow furrows, not understanding his words in the least, but I answer him anyway. “Since our kiss outside the wall. After you saved me from the Beastia,” I admit, and just like that, Lennox’s control snaps. He releases a feral growl and grips his oversized shirt I have on, tearing it up and off of me in a single movement.
“Fuuuck,” he groans, his heated green eyes locked with mine before they dart down to my breasts. “You’re so damn beautiful,” he rasps, running a hand down my side, his head tilting predatorily to the side, eyes darkening with lust. Just as fast, he reaches behind him with one hand, gripping the back of his shirt, and I lunge forward, wanting to undress him myself.
I grab the black fabric, tearing it over his head and tossing it at his feet. I almost drool as I look at him: chiseled abs and bronzed skin with a line of dark hair that starts at his belly button and runs past the waistband of his pants.
Tattoos cover the expanse of skin, more black ink showing than bronze skin, and several faint white lines wrap around his torso, scars from some battle, or maybe a Beastia? But even those only enhance his attractiveness; every inch of Lennox Regalis is a well-muscled killing machine. There are two blades sheathed at his side and I grin, loving how he’s armed even here with me. With everything that’s happened in the last few weeks, Nox’s presence and the knowledge that he’s armed only makes me feel more protected. Something I didn’t know I liked until this moment.
I hesitantly reach out a hand, letting the tips of my fingers run over the length of the scars, and smile a little.
“We match,” I whisper, loving how I’m not the only scarred one in this room.
“In more ways than one.” His fingers move to my chin, pressing it up so that he can capture my lips with his. One moment, I’m kissing him with everything I have, pressed against the wall with his big body between my thighs. The next, Nox is spinning us, his hands moving to my waist and tossing me through the air, tearing a startled scream from my lips just as I crash onto the soft bed in the corner of the room.
My arms fly out to push myself up, ready to chew Nox a new asshole, just as his big hand presses against my chest. He leans over me, pants slung low on his waist, as he grabs the knife holster, yanking it from his body and tossing it carelessly to the small bedside table.
“Down,” he commands, lighting up a surge of rebellion as his magic cords around me. I can feel it flickering to life, swirling in the air as it runs over my skin like a lover’s caress. I shiver, trying not to let it distract me as I glare up at Nox.
He grins, his teeth too pointed to be normal as he flicks the button of his pants and shucks them off. “You have to make things difficult, don’t you?” he asks, seeing the defiance in my eyes as his hands move to my waist, and I’m suddenly flipped to my stomach and gasp at the sharp tug on my hip bones as Nox tears my panties from me. I gasp in shock as his arm hooks under my hips, yanking my ass up in the air as his other hand presses to the back of my neck, pinning me down and completely dominating me in under a second.
