Secrets & Photographs, page 10
Marissa had been invited to get up and speak about Allison, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. She had a poem about grief she had planned to read at the funeral but couldn’t do it then either. Instead, she stayed off to the side, isolating herself from the crowd, watching. Natalie spoke of Allison and her love for Port Townsend. How she found joy in everything she did. She had also managed to get Tyler on video to speak of his sister. Many more friends got up to speak. Even Laura Seaver got up on the stage and spoke of Allie’s love of nature and how they had explored so much of the surrounding forests together.
Marissa scanned the crowd, hoping something would catch her eye. But there was nothing. She knew all of these people, and it was hard to imagine any of them taking another person’s life.
Her eyes landed on her own family, both immediate and ex-in-laws. Mel tried to wave her over, but she just shook her head, silently hoping they understood she was working. It was easier this way. She was a detective looking for a murderer, playing security as the town came together. It was so much easier than being the best friend of a victim. She may have been both, but she couldn’t let herself feel it. Just like she had been doing with so much of herself in the last few years, she shoved that piece of her into a box and set it adrift. She needed to stay focused, and the only way to do that was to keep herself numb.
When she was at home, Marissa continued working hard on feeling as little as possible, using sleep, medication, and alcohol, as needed. Aside from going into the precinct, she mostly stayed home. In her office, Marissa had flipped over the whiteboard. She pinned pictures of Allison and Cindy and wrote the facts below them. She circled the coincidences. The ghost tour locations. The close proximity in time. But it wasn’t enough to convince even her that there was a connection. Were they just random acts of violence? She wrote the question out on a post-it note and stuck it in the middle of the board. Other than the fact that crime never happened here, let alone murder, two murders in two nights were just unfathomable.
Staring at Allison’s picture, Marissa didn’t notice as tears welled in her eyes. She could still feel her friend’s piercing blue eyes and hear her voice reassuring her that it was all going to be okay.
As Friday rolled around, a week after Allison’s funeral, she decided to skip her appointment with Laura Seaver. What was the point of even going in this week? This was the only thing that was on Marissa’s mind. That, and occasionally how lonely the house felt even with the addition of Wicket. She started mentally preparing herself for a visit to Seattle, spending nearly an hour in the shower, just lost in the thought.
It was mid-afternoon when she finally found her way downstairs. She heard the alarm from her phone before the knock on her door. Ellie whined excitedly at the prospect of seeing another human as Marissa got up from the couch and glanced out the window. Jack was standing on her porch, leaning against the railing. He obviously had remembered which house was hers after walking her home a few weeks ago from their lunch date.
As Marissa opened the door, Ellie cried excitedly as Marissa slid through the front door past the giant dog. “Hey. How are you?” She was trying to remember if they had made plans that she had spaced on. It would not have been unlike her at this point.
“Hi,” he grinned at her. He had such a friendly smile. “I was wondering if you wanted to head to the Fort today. I heard people had spotted some whales off the coast, and I thought you could use a pick-me-up?”
A small part of Marissa actually wanted to go. Still, just as she was running through the excuses in her mind of why she wasn’t feeling up to being social, she noticed her brother-in-law coming toward her house, as well.
Marissa smiled at Jack and just shook her head. “Rain check?” she offered as she watched Brian duck into her backyard, unnoticed by the handsome man in front of her.
Despite his grin, he looked disappointed.
“It’s just been a really long week.”
“Of course. I’m sorry, I should have realized.” He gave her a sympathetic smile. Just what she hadn’t wanted to see. But he did have that friendly smile. “But I will definitely take a rain check. I look forward to it.” He brought his hand forward from behind his back and handed her a single yellow daisy. “This is for you. I will see you around.” He turned, shoving his hands in his pocket, and walked down the street.
Marissa watched from the porch until he turned the corner and let out a sigh, glancing at the flower. Shrugging it off, she turned and walked through the house, leaving the daisy on the counter as she went to the back porch.
When she arrived, she found Brian already seated in one of the chairs, a bottle of whiskey at his feet. Ellie was all but crawling into his lap, her tail wagging with excitement.
“Some guard dog,” Marissa commented, sighing when the shepherd paid her no mind. Flopping into the chair beside him, she flicked off her sandals. She looked over at her brother-in-law suspiciously before eyeing the bottle of whiskey. “Don’t tell me you knocked my sister up again.”
But she already knew. This was the tradition. Brian always told her before Melanie did, and always with a bottle of liquor. Even before Marissa and Jared’s first marriage, she and Brian were close friends. It used to be in celebration. Now Marissa wondered if maybe it was a little less of a celebration than it used to be. They already had four kids. And all girls.
“I can’t tell you that.”
Marissa nodded her head. “Well, that answers my next question. We’re drinking this now.” She got up and grabbed glasses.
They spent the better part of an hour talking about his kids and plotting to convince Mel that five was more than enough. It was exciting news, but she definitely felt for him. Hopefully, they would have a boy this time.
“Unfortunately, I don’t have much news for you.” One of the perks of having a sister-in-law who worked on local cases was that Marissa was always willing to give him the news when she could. He was a good reporter. “I will be heading into Seattle tomorrow to talk to Nat. She had something she wanted to tell me but was uncomfortable doing so here.”
Marissa made a face before downing her third glass of whiskey. She hadn’t been counting how many Brian had already had, but she was pretty sure she was drinking faster than he was.
“Let’s talk about something else.”
“How about whale watching?” Brian smirked at her, mimicking Jack’s southern drawl.
Marissa frowned. “It was a nice offer. He’s a really nice guy.” She filled her glass again and swallowed without taking much of a breath in between.
“Nice?” Brian pointed out how nice sounded like fine. She shrugged and shook her head.
“I’m not really looking for anything right now.” Then there was that uncomfortable silence. Maybe they should have kept talking about murder. But before she could stop herself, words came falling out of her mouth. “You know Jared didn’t say anything to me during the funeral?” The bitterness was sharp.
Glancing over, she saw Brian’s face as he was trying to think of something to say. But what could he say? All he knew was that Marissa had decided to stay in Port Townsend and that Jared was just done. With a heavy sigh, she stood before she could think better of it, hanging on tight to what was left of the whiskey.
“Come with me. I need to show you something.” She took the last pull off the bottle and put it on the island counter beside the yellow daisy before she made her way over to the opposite end of the kitchen. She hopped onto the counter, wincing as her body protested, and stood, grabbing a gray lock box hidden all the way to the back. Very carefully, she got back down and put it beside the empty bottle of whiskey, then went into her dining room to pull out a key she had hidden in a glass in her hutch. She returned to the kitchen and started to unlock the box.
“I owe you a bottle of whiskey,” she announced as she opened the box and dumped the contents onto the island. Dozens and dozens of candid photos spilled over the counter.
Most of them focused on Marissa, some of both Marissa and Jared, but few concentrated on just Jared.
“These kept being delivered.” She backed up to a counter, hopping up to sit, leaning her hands on the edge. “Are being delivered,” she corrected herself. “I don’t know how much you know about my last case in Seattle, but this was always how it started. And then the significant other would end up dead.”
Marissa never spoke about that case or the things she endured, but she was sure someone had given him Cliff’s Notes at some point. “I stopped getting photos of Jared when we broke up.” She hated herself for it, but she would have done it all over again.
Brian thumbed through the photos, running his fingers over them as he spread them further onto the counter, his eyes looking frantic.
“Your case…” Marissa watched quietly as Brian caught up to everything she was saying. She knew it was a lot. “You were a target. No, wait … you are a target. You made him break up with you to keep him safe. You lied because you didn’t want him to end up dead.”
The more he said out loud, the more she wanted to slap herself for telling him. It was a lot to process. And it was dangerous information to have.
“Fuck, Marissa. This isn’t something you just keep locked up in a box!”
“I promise, I’m taking care of it. The local PD knows. The SPD knows.” Not that anyone was doing much, but she didn’t need to give him those details. “There are local police across the street for surveillance. I promise I’m not just ignoring it.” It did fall lower on her priority list now, though.
Now came the challenging part. “You can’t tell anyone. And I mean anyone.”
Immediately, she regretted saying anything at all, even though she had gotten a moment’s relief. There was someone out there who knew her and knew she wasn’t just a terrible person.
He wasn’t pleased. At all. His lips had disappeared in a thin frown as he narrowed his eyes at her. He gritted his teeth, and she could see a vein in his neck.
“I know it’s a lot. But I promise I’ve got this under control.”
He continued to just stare at her.
“I’m sorry I told you, I just—” She paused. She wasn’t really sure why she had told him. “I shouldn’t have told you. But the fewer the people who know, the safer everyone is. I promise I will keep you informed.”
“Marissa. This isn’t just about you. My girls are in the background of some of these pictures!” he snapped.
“I know.”
“Why did you even bother telling me, Marissa?”
“Because I just needed someone to know the truth. I needed someone to know that I’m not a fucking heartless bitch.”
At that Brian sighed, silent for a moment. “Explain it to me,” he said, folding his arms. “I need to understand.”
Marissa took a deep breath. “This was my case two years ago. I don’t know how much you know, but the killer targeted couples. He would first send photos of his intended victim, the woman. Just your basic stalker photos, like those.” Marissa gestured. “Then, would come the photos of the significant other; the boyfriend, the husband, whatever. And usually, anywhere between two and four weeks later, he would end up dead. And then so would she. When I started getting photos of Jared, I shoved him away and forced him out of the picture, literally. We’re both still here. Six months later.”
She shook her head. “I’ve got police surveilling the house, and I’m taking all the precautions. I’ve been printing all the photos that come in to make sure there aren’t any fingerprints or residue. They are always clean. I’m in constant contact with the Seattle police. I’ve got extra locks on the doors; I’ve got the Ring security system.”
Now she was stretching it. She barely remembered to bother locking her door. Now that it was just her, her level of caring wavered. But Brian didn’t need that information.
When Brian finally left, he wasn’t wholly convinced or completely thrilled but seemed to at least take her at her word. Despite the regret she felt for spilling her own secret, it did mean something to her that someone knew. That someone believed her. Dr. Seaver was just like the rest of the Seattle Police Department; she appeased Marissa, but she very often questioned Marissa’s memory and whether or not there was a real connection between both cases. This was probably just a case of average voyeurism, which, while classified under stalking, was not nearly as severe as murder. If it was the same guy, why hadn’t he come for her yet? He had never spent so much time just taking pictures before. Unsettling? Sure. But dangerous? Maybe not so much.
After Brian left, she returned all the photos to their box, shuddering at the sight of them. She didn’t even feel fear anymore, not really. Now she felt angry. Resentful. Frustrated. There was still some fear in there, too, but buried well beneath the others. She fed Ellie and stared at the flower left on her counter. After looking through all those photographs, Marissa was comfortable keeping someone as lovely as Jack at arm’s length. He was too nice to get mixed up with her. She considered tossing the daisy away, but instead, she grabbed a small glass, put some water in it, and placed the daisy in the water. She couldn’t remember the last time she had gotten flowers.
Chapter 11
Marissa stepped onto the pier with a huff, holding Ellie close. The ferry ride had been quick, maybe too quick. It felt weird to be back in the city. She had come for a few follow-up doctor’s appointments that first year, but now it had been a minute. She still had forty minutes before she was supposed to meet Natalie, and after that, she could catch the evening ferry to head back. She had no intentions of being there longer than she had to. Ellie had her nose in the air, tail wagging slowly, excited at all the new sights and smells. Marissa couldn’t help but smile. She hadn’t spent a lot of time in Seattle, but Ellie was amazing in public.
They spent the first half-hour walking around the marketplace. This was something Marissa really missed. The market in the morning was one of her favorite places, with fresh flowers and artwork and, most importantly, the fantastic food. It took no time at all before she ended up at Mee Sum Pastry for some crab rangoons before heading to Steinbrueck Park north of the market. She sat in front of the art installation, Ellie lying down at her feet, and waited. They were still ten minutes early. The breeze coming in from the Sound felt good against her face, with the sun peeking out from behind gray clouds. Closing her eyes, she focused on her breathing, feeling much more relaxed than she thought she would.
“You’re early.” A voice broke through her moment of quiet, and Marissa let out a loud sigh. “Sorry to interrupt your moment or whatever.”
Marissa opened her eyes to see Natalie staring down at her, though it was bright enough that she had to squint. Natalie was looking around nervously, making Marissa very aware that the constant feeling of being watched wasn’t supposed to be a normal one. All of the woman’s anxiety was only in her eyes, though, as she stood tall with the kind of presence that demanded importance, whether she meant to or not. Natalie had been like that in high school, too. A beauty queen who managed straight A’s and loved being the smartest person in the room.
“Good morning to you too, Natalie.” She sat forward and leaned her elbows onto her knees. “Are you doing any better?” Natalie just shook her head with a heavy sigh. They hadn’t been small talk people when Allison was alive; they certainly weren’t going to start now. “You said you had something you wanted to talk about.”
“A little.” Natalie looked almost relieved if her serious expression gave anything away. “I did. And I appreciate you coming.” She sat down beside Marissa and looked at her hands in her lap. Her expression did change. She looked heartbroken. “I always thought it would be Allison and me, you know?” She looked up at Marissa with tears in her eyes before looking down at her hands again.
Marissa struggled to keep her expression neutral. She hadn’t been Natalie’s biggest fan, although she liked her more than she ever cared for Laura Seaver. But Allison was a huge loss they all shared. She sighed softly and gave Ellie’s ear a scratch while Natalie took her own moment, still trying to find the right thing to say.
“She was really excited to start things again,” Marissa offered.
Natalie smiled as tears fell down her cheeks without looking up and nodded her head. “I’m sorry. I promised myself I wouldn’t do this.” She swallowed and raised her head to meet her gaze. “When Allison first called me a few months ago, it was so out of the blue. Our breakup,” she paused, glancing at Marissa. “Well, you know. It wasn’t great.”
Marissa resisted the urge to nod. “Wasn’t great” was an understatement. Marissa could still remember the late-night conversations with Allie during that time, always talking her off a ledge. Everything they did made the other unhappy or suspicious. Allison had called Marissa the day after hooking up with someone else, though Allie had never told her who. That was what Marissa had always considered the real beginning of the end for their relationship. Everything after that point just became toxic.
“But she said she wanted to talk. She apologized for her part in everything that happened in those last few months that led to our breakup.” Natalie looked at Marissa almost nervously. “I’m not sure what she told you about it.”
Marissa sighed. “She said you were both miserable. You maxed out her credit cards; she cheated on you; you cheated on her. She said it was explosive.”
Natalie nodded, looking at her hands again. “She was unhappy, and she restarted an affair that made her the worst version of herself.” Natalie hesitated. When she stopped, Ellie stood and put her head on Natalie’s knee, wagging her tail. Marissa couldn’t help but smile at her dog’s efforts, and a smile appeared on Natalie’s lips. “When she called me up, she said that it was finally over. After all these years. She told me that this relationship had made her do questionable things and that … this person put her in a compromising position. For a long time.”
