Mazeweaver, page 16
But the only way to reshape an inner maze created with as much force of will as this one would be to constrain it into a new physical shape. Just as Kai had needed to cut the labyrinth into the turf to give power to the mental design, so she would need to trace the shape of the labyrinth over the whole area where this physical maze was manifesting. Over all these miles of mountains and rivers and valleys. How many days – weeks – might that take? Did Quantum have that long?
Unless ...
It was asking so much. Too much. But Aliya needed wings.
Turning away from the cliff face and facing her friends, she said, ‘Meri, I think only you can get us through this maze.’
‘Why me?’ the invisible little creature asked, her wings fanning soft breaths of air over Aliya’s cheeks. ‘This is not my element; I can’t feel a thing.’
‘But you can fly,’ Aliya said.
‘Hey!’ Quantum said.
It was true that his flying was much improved, but... ‘I’m sorry, Quantum; I don’t trust your wings. I won’t put an unknown elemental force into the middle of a ritual.’
Quantum turned away, ducking his head, and she was stabbed with remorse. But it was true, and she was only doing this to save him. ‘Meri, I know this will be hard for you, but I have to ask. Will you mark out a labyrinth over this area?’
‘Like the one I was imprisoned in?’
‘Yes. But it won’t be a trap, I promise! It’s the opposite; a way out of this maze.’
Meriel flew in agitated spirals, the breeze whipping Aliya’s braids against her face. ‘And what good would it do, anyway?’
Aliya swallowed. ‘I could use the imprint you make on the air above to change the pattern this cursed elemental had made on the ground below. But I would need a link to you ... need you to let me—’
The wind slapped her in the face so hard her head jerked back.
‘You want to control me just like he did.’
Massaging her neck, Aliya dropped her eyes to the ground. ‘No. Yes, but ... I’m asking for your help, as a friend.’ She couldn’t make herself lift her head. Her heart was hammering. Had she ever begged someone for aid before? Maybe not since she was a small child who reached out to her parents for protection. She felt just as small and vulnerable now. And she was making Meriel confront even greater vulnerabilities.
‘I’m sorry, Meriel,’ she said, ‘I shouldn’t have asked.’
‘You know she’s a better person than me,’ Kai said.
She felt the air elemental settle onto her shoulder, a feather-weight touch.
‘The difference is, you aren’t asking for yourself,’ Meri said. ‘For Quantum, I will do as you ask.’
Aliya prepared for the ritual by finding a level area under a group of pines. The ground was covered in pine needles, and she swept a pathway through them: circle upon circle, a miniature labyrinth marked on the ground. Settling herself cross-legged in the centre, she sank into a shallow trance.
To her heightened senses, the labyrinth pulsed with power. The air elemental came to hover before her, a blazing point of light with coruscating trails behind. They both reached out, a connection of subtle minds, an invitation – there was a spark of pure elemental magic in Aliya’s breast, and she could see through Meri’s eyes.
Meriel shot straight up into the sky, and part of Aliya went with her, dizzy and ecstatic. They flew a labyrinth, arc after effortless arc. And Aliya pulled the earth into a new shape behind them. From up here, she could see the shape of the maze they had been lost in: not a physical reality, but a mental pattern imposed upon the land, twisting and confusing the senses. As Meriel passed above the maze, Aliya untangled the threads of confusion and twined them into her labyrinth.
They left no trace upon the sky, but Aliya could feel the resonance building with each inward spiral until she held the completed pattern in her mind. She was both above and below; her body an anchor on the ground, her mind part of the sky. She was a mirror, and so the ground must mirror the sky above. No longer a maze, but her labyrinth.
It was so beautiful from up here, everything so distant and simple. Did she have to return? Why not take just a little time for herself, this one chance to fly ...
But it was not her time: it was Meriel’s gift. To hang onto it would be to abuse that trust.
Aliya broke the connection and thumped back into her body. Infinite space was ripped away and her perceptions contracted to inside her pounding skull. Her limbs felt heavy and ungainly as she got to her feet.
‘Right,’ she said to her waiting companions, ‘now I know where to go.’
The way forward was obvious, each rocky pass and tumbling stream as familiar as her own backyard. There were only a few more miles to go. Before night had fallen, they came over one last ridge and looked across a steep ravine to a towering peak, black and white against a purple sky. Just above the valley floor, a gaping cave mouth. There was no doubt it was their destination: it nearly vibrated with fractured power.
Aliya had never been less happy to achieve a goal. She gulped. ‘Tomorrow, we go into the mountain.’
Not enough
‘Don’t you think it’s weird that we’re all at a thirteenth birthday party?’ I ask Ravi.
He shrugs. ‘Certainly not the weirdest thing we’ve all done. Besides, she’s one of us, now.’
Leaning back against the wall, I bask in the feeling of being part of something. The leader of something, even: I’m the one with the connection to the otherworldly stuff, after all.
Justin’s band – him on sax, Laurie on trombone, some girl on a keyboard which is doubling as a fake drum kit – are playing old-fashioned stuff that sounds vaguely familiar. They’re not bad, though. Lily’s being all fan-girly and forcing her friends to dance. Our living room furniture is shoved up against the walls, and the makeshift dance floor has spread into the kitchen.
The band takes a break, and Laurie comes skipping – seriously, skipping – over to Ravi, his curly hair bouncing all over the place.
‘Come and dance!’
Ravi chokes on his lemonade. He must really like this guy, though: he actually goes with it. Shoving his drink and phone into my hands, Ravi lets himself be pulled onto the dance floor. Jazz is still the order of the day, some old vinyl that Lily got hold of. Laurie and Ravi pretend to waltz. Cute and ridiculous.
Ravi’s phone beeps in my hand. Instinct has me checking the screen. I almost drop it. The music is suddenly out of tune. I unlock his phone; I’ve seen the pattern a thousand times. I know it’s wrong – but what he’s done is a far worse betrayal. Opening the text thread, I scroll back:
Ravi: That’s fascinating. Can you explain the process?
The Mantis: The wiring is my nervous system.
Ravi: What about the people who work in the shard?
The Mantis: Ah, my intestinal parasites (laughing emoji) They all connect to my Wi-Fi
Before I can read more, Ravi grabs the phone. ‘How could you, Luca!’
‘Me? Me? What the hell do you think you’re doing?’
Justin’s band start up a new number, and we stand almost chest to chest so we can whisper-shout without anyone else hearing.
‘I’m making a scientific enquiry,’ Ravi says. ‘Think what this could mean, what progress we could make—’
‘Progress towards destroying the planet, you mean,’ I snap. ‘Destroying everything I’m working towards.’
‘You don’t know that, Luca,’ he says. ‘You don’t know very much, really, do you? You’re just bumbling along – but I’m learning things. Things that could help! With this, I could be the foremost scientist of my generation—’
‘Oh, that’s how it got to you, is it?’ I spit. ‘Ambition.’
‘There’s nothing wrong with being ambitious,’ he says. ‘You should try it sometime.’
‘There’s something wrong if it makes you go behind my back like this. Ravi, The Mantis is influencing you; let me—’
He bats my hand away as I reach for him. ‘Yeah, The Mantis said you’d try something like that. You don’t want me to have any ideas that you haven’t fed me. Well, I’ve got someone who listens to my ideas, now. Who encourages me more than you ever did.’
Lily shoves between us. ‘What’s going on with you two?’
‘Luca thinks they’re the only person who’s good enough to save the world,’ Ravi says.
‘No one is saving the world at my party!’ Lily snaps. ‘I’m trying to just have one night of being a normal girl, okay? Boys and dancing and not dying of cancer or having my phone blown up by a make-believe monster. Don’t you dare ruin it.’
‘Sorry,’ says Ravi. He still sounds pissed off.
I don’t say anything. I’m finding it hard to breathe. Lily punches me in the arm and flounces off. Ravi makes a point of sending a text while staring at me belligerently. I’d grab it off him again if my hands weren’t going numb.
Then Padma’s there, because she’s always there to rescue me, and I love that but I’m scared to love it because I don’t want to give her more reasons to believe I need her. I don’t want us to be based on need.
Pulling my head down onto her shoulder, she murmurs, ‘Breathe with me, Luca. It’s okay; I’ve got you.’
Just like the first time we met, but without any barriers between us now. Except that she says, ‘You put too much pressure on yourself, babe. You’re always trying to do the right thing; just think about yourself for once.’
And I want to believe she’s saying that because she cares about my happiness, but I can’t help thinking that taking my eye off the ball is exactly what The Mantis would like me to do.
My cramped lungs eventually manage to draw in a full breath.
‘I could take your mind off it,’ Padma breathes into my ear. ‘Let’s sneak up to your room for a bit.’
I squirm. ‘I’m supposed to be chaperoning.’ Of course I want to go with her. So why am I grateful to have an excuse not to?
I avoid Ravi for the rest of the night. Try to focus on Lily, carefree and happy, twirling around in a 1920s flapper dress. I want to tell Justin what’s going on, but first he’s playing and then I can’t find him. At last, I spot him slipping out the door as the party’s winding down at about ten o’clock.
Following him outside, I call after him down the front steps. He halts at the gate, looking poised to run.
‘Oh, hey, Luca.’ He’s unconvincingly blasé.
‘What, you too?’ I say. ‘What did the Mantis offer you, then? What made you reply?’
‘What?’ says Justin. ‘Of course I didn’t reply. You told me to ignore the messages, so I did.’
My relief is short-lived. ‘Why are you avoiding me, then?
‘I’m not!’ he claims, literally inching down the drive away from me.
If it’s not because of The Mantis, then it must be because of ... me. Man up, says a snide little voice in the back of my head. Weakly, I tell it to shut up.
‘I get it,’ I tell Justin. ‘I know I can be a lot. And now everything’s so crazy ... I shouldn’t have dragged you into it.’
‘It’s not that,’ he says, then pauses for about three thousand seconds. ‘I kissed your sister!’
The world keeps making less and less sense. Don’t I have enough to deal with?
‘She’s twelve!’
Justin gestures helplessly towards the party. ‘Thirteen.’ He gazes at me with his pretty puppy-dog eyes. ‘I know she’s young ... I’ve been trying not to ... you know I’d never – I mean, we’ll wait until she’s older, sixteen at least...’
If I was being rational, I’d think: this is Justin. He’s been waiting for a first kiss that felt right. He’s a hopeless romantic. There’s no one I’d trust my sister with more. But I’ve been pushed past rational tonight. I tip my head back and scream at the sky.
When I look back down, Justin is legging it down the street. There is no one left that I can trust.
Without even going inside for my coat, I start walking. I’ve got some change in my pockets, enough for a bus fare. I change at Trafalgar Square, which is still a snarl of traffic even at half past ten. Around the back of The Shard is dead quiet, though. Until I get there and start shouting.
‘Do be quiet, Luca,’ The Mantis says, amused. ‘You’ll get yourself arrested.’
Its faceted eyes glow with a faint copper light. It tilts its massive head down towards me until I could reach out and touch it. I’d quite like to punch it, but I’m not that stupid: it’s made of metal, and I can’t even remember if you’re supposed to keep your thumb on the inside or outside of your fist.
‘Leave my friends alone,’ I shout. ‘You’ve got hundreds of people working in The Shard every day – what do you want with my friends?’
‘Just to ensure that I am left alone,’ it says, voice drilling into my head. ‘Some insurance that you will not interfere with my plans.’
‘But I wasn’t doing anything.’
‘Are you going to pretend that those weak little nature spirits haven’t been whispering against me?’ It blinks, the sound like a camera shutter, and for a moment darkness closes in. ‘It is our nature to be in opposition. You are in the middle, Luca. Have you already chosen a side?’
‘Yes. I mean, no. Why do there have to be sides?’
‘Because their ascendancy means my decline. And have you thought about what that will mean for you, Luca? Nature does not concern itself with humanity. I, on the other hand, am linked to humankind; I have an investment in your future.’
‘The decline of nature is killing humans. I’m on the side of everyone surviving.’
And right now, this feels like drowning, not survival. It’s all on me; I have to do something. Short out the electrics again like I did the night of the light show, shut The Mantis down, show it I have cards in my hand too—
‘Really, Luca?’ It hisses a laugh, tendrils of electric charge coiling against my own. ‘Do you know how far my reach extends, now? Are you going to cut off power to the whole city? Anything you do to hurt me will also hurt your own people. Or do you plan to take humanity back to the Dark Ages to protect those spirits who won’t lift a finger to help you?’
‘They are helping, just by being alive—’
‘Naïve little creature, aren’t you? Next you will be telling me that your pet elementals care about you. That they are your friends. You don’t have any friends, Luca.’
‘Stop it!’ I yell. ‘Stop it.’
I have to stop thinking that it’s true. Because that’s what The Mantis does: takes what you think and places it front and centre, plays that one feeling on an endless loop until it fills your mind ... Until I’m crushed by loneliness and I can’t shout anymore because I can’t get enough air, can only huddle on the pavement with my head buried in my knees and mouth, ‘Stop, please stop,’ over and over again...
A sharp breeze whips my hair back and I manage to raise my head. Sneezy and Doc are circling me, shimmers of iridescence in the cold streetlight. I think one of them shakes a fist at The Mantis. They are silent, which is strange – they never shut up.
‘Say something,’ I wheeze. Doc hovers in front of my face. Silence. Is there something wrong with them? No; there’s something wrong with me. I don’t deserve to hear them. I’m not enough of a shaman, not enough of an anything.
Everything is starting to spin because my throat has closed up. Can you actually die from having a panic attack? I think I’m going to be the first. At least there will be something special to say about me in my obituary.
‘Sir? Is everything alright? Do you need an ambulance?’
Oh, hell: a policeman. The Mantis was right. I really am going to get myself arrested.
Or possibly worse: he ends up calling my dad. Then takes us to the police station for a drug test, because, you know, I was shouting at thin air.
‘We were relying on you to keep an eye on Lily’s party,’ Dad says as we’re driving home. Like he’s trying to figure out if he’s allowed to shout at someone who’s just had a panic attack.
He doesn’t need to bother: I’ve got castigation covered.
‘Yeah, well,’ I mutter, cheek pressed to the cold glass, ‘better get used to being let down.’
That’s all I can succeed at. No, there is one thing I can still do, the only option left to me – be someone else. I go home and dream I’m Aliya.
Death curse
‘Ohhh,’ Meri moaned, flying in agitated spirals, ‘I don’t like this one bit.’
‘Neither do I,’ said Aliya, ‘which means it’s sure to be the right place.’
The steady pulse of anger was building in momentum, readying to send out another stream of poison into the dragons’ minds. This broad cave mouth was the source. It fitted the part: an ugly, gaping wound in the side of the mountain, blasted by dragon fire and gouged deeper by mighty talons. It had clearly once been a site of industry: a paved road led down the valley, and the entrance was busy with tools and pulleys and little wheeled carts. All abandoned. The curse had struck here, too – this was likely the first casualty – and only ruins remained.
‘What was this place?’ Aliya asked.
‘A mine of some sort,’ Quantum said, trailing forlornly through the debris lining the cave. ‘Copper, I think, judging from these scraps of ore.’
‘I’m going in there alone,’ Aliya said. ‘Quantum – don’t argue. Not this time. I’m sorry, but you’re a liability. You can’t come without Meri, and I can’t ask this of her.’ They both looked at the air spirit, buzzing around outside the cave like a trapped bee.
‘I hate this,’ Quantum hissed in frustration.
Aliya knelt beside him and rested a hand on his back. ‘I’ll find a way to free you.’
‘That’s what I hate!’ He glanced up at her with burning eyes. ‘You don’t treat me like an equal anymore: I’m just another thing you have to fix. I don’t want to be your responsibility.’
