Deception (Facets of Feyrie Book 3), page 16
It could also be her trauma was so significant that this is how she copes.
“Stop beating yourself up over the strange behavior of the girl. It is the bane of humans, their children at this age. They have had thousands of years, and they still do not understand themselves.”
“The change seems so sudden, though. Do you think she’s the one being possessed?” I hate asking the question, but it needs to be asked.
“No, there are no signs of possession… I saw her when the attack initially happened, and it was not her.” He shoulder bumps me, his version of a quick hug. “The grateful child you rescued was just a facet of her character, Iza. Everyone has traits that are undesirable.”
“Oh, really? What are mine?” He opens his mouth to respond, in the honest, forthright way he has when Adriem coughs loudly.
“That’s a trap man, don’t fall in it!” he warns him.
I smile, I can’t help myself. Phobe’s mouth shuts, and he gives me a dirty look. I savor this moment, and carefully store this memory away. Seeing such emotion from him is rare and special.
This is one of my ways of coping. Holding onto the good memories with the tenacity of a kraken. They feed the spark inside of me and keep me going. They help me keep smiling. They are what makes me keep living with joy in my heart. Phobe gives me a deep look and then turns to kiss my lips softly. He’s gone before it registers in my fuddled brain, but the warmth of his mouth still lingers.
Another memory to tuck away.
A sudden yawn spurns me into action. “I don’t see anything else useful, let’s go—I’m tired.” I’m always tired now, even with the ring on. I don’t like telling anyone. If I tell Adriem he’ll fuss at me. If I tell Phobe, he’ll find ways to cockblock me all the time from doing shit.
He’s the only one who can, and he knows it.
On the way back to the hotel I manage to fall asleep with my face plastered against the window. When the door opens, and strong arms catch me, I keep my eyes closed and let him lift me up against that chest I love so much. He grunts in amusement, fully aware that I’m awake, but still he carries me.
Tossing me on the bed is unexpected, but I giggle as I bounce across it. That doesn’t stop me from kicking my shoes off and snuggling into the pillow. I’m genuinely still tired. He slides in behind me and wraps his arm around me and shoves the other under me. Pulling me against him, he buries his face in my hair and sighs.
“Rest, Iza. I will always watch over you,” he whispers. Safe, comfortable, and so tired my eyes burn, I give in and let sleep claim me once again.
P hobe
TO THIS DAY, the fact that I like to watch her sleep still surprises me. Her mouth is normally hanging wide open, like in the car, but this time she is sleeping peacefully. The sleep of an exhausted person. Iza thinks she is sneaky enough to hide the fact that she is still sick, even wearing the ring. Something needs to be done about it. Either she needs to return to the Sidhe, or we have to find another way.
Self-consciously I pat the small velvet covered box in my pocket. The annoying ringtone of her phone spurs me to grab it before she wakes. Right now, she needs to rest and recharge and get as strong as possible. I look at the screen and the ‘unknown number’ displayed on it. Sliding the circle to green, I put the phone to my ear.
Michael screaming is the first thing I hear. The annoying voice of the Guide comes over the line. “Good, you answered. It only took me taking half his fingernails to make him scream. As you know, I have a collar that will make your dear Iza mortal. Once she’s mortal, I’ll kill her, slowly. But… if you trade yourself to me, I’ll let these brats go and leave your woman alive. Meet me at the docks at the lake to make the exchange, you for them.” Then the line goes dead.
The urge to squeeze the phone until it shatters into tiny pieces is strong. Pausing only long enough to take the sim card out, I then get the satisfaction of it bending and breaking in my hand. Tossing it away I climb to my feet and go to Adriem’s room. He opens the door on the first knock.
I hand him the sim card, “Iza needs a new phone, I broke the other one. Let her sleep and get her lots of food when she wakes up.” He nods, and I turn and walk back to our room.
Kneeling on the floor next to her I caress her face. She will trade herself for those two kids. There is not a single doubt in my mind. She loves them like they are her children. The idea of them being hurt because of her is something she cannot live with for long. Losing them will bring forth all that pain she has stashed in the back of her mind. It will snuff out the life inside of her, the life that makes me smile—the life that gave me life. It will end the sound of her laughter that still has the power to make me… happy. Take that light out of her eyes that makes me want to do anything in the world to please her. I have seen those eyes with no light in them before. It is not something I can do again.
Iza is the only thing that makes life bearable, she is the key to me feeling like I am alive, and whole. She is what makes anything worthwhile. I refuse to exist without her. I refuse to allow them to take her from this world. Leaning forward, I kiss her mouth, ignoring the burning of my eyes and the wetness that trails down my cheek to drip onto her face. I put everything I feel for her, every single fucking thing, into that kiss.
Standing, I open the box and place it on the pillow next to her face. The opal flickers in the light, looking much like her eyes do when I am inside of her. A wedding was something I was planning on giving her. Such a simple thing for all the pleasure it would bring her, as it would also give me another solid tie to her.
Selfishly, I cannot give her up—to anything.
With one long, last look at her, I turn away, my form twisting and changing into a replica of the woman lying on the bed.
LIFE’S GOAL all along was to put me in this position. I should have seen it sooner. Instead of mentally flagellating myself I look for evidence of him. The lake is small, which makes it easier to find the van that sticks out in the fresh snow. The stark white color with the blacked-out windows makes it look suspicious without trying to. The muffled curses and shouting from the inside of it, does not discount that. Outside it stands a varying bunch of shifters and vampires, with the token schoth thrown in. The Guide stands off to the side. His bodyguards are scattered around him, none of them dressed for the cold weather and looking like they realized it too late. He is wearing a fur coat, something that is not commonly worn by the inhabitants of this world—at least in this country. He looks like the moron he is.
Making my way towards them, I fall into the walking pattern of Iza. Iza walks like a man, which makes mimicking her easier. The smirk is easy too. I have seen it enough to know it by heart.
“Well, well, you showed up.”
“I told you she would. Iza’s a fucking softy when it comes to us,” Ruthie says, climbing out of the passenger side of the van. The thoughts in her head now are not nice ones. The grudge she bears for Iza, predominant and the selfish, hormonally driven obsession she has for Michael is the reasoning she gives herself for doing it all. She wants what Iza has and has convinced herself, with help from the manipulation of the Guide, that she can have it all if Iza is gone.
Ruthie is the spy, and, in her thoughts, I discover the identity of the one Light has been riding. Motherfucker.
“Now where is the blonde man that we’re expecting?” the Guide asks. Looking at his fingernails nonchalantly. Then he stiffens, and his eyes roll back in his head. “Oh, the one you want is here? Okay, yes…” he starts mumbling to himself. He opens his eyes and looks right at me.
“He says if you fight it, he’ll kill her.”
The net closes around me before I can move, one that holds me solid in its grasp. I know the feel of that power, the taste of it, and even though I can fight it, I do not. If he says he will kill her, then he will. Light is many things, but he is a creature of his word. He will leave her alone if I go peacefully. Besides, I can survive his torture; she cannot.
“Let the two men go; I was ordered to keep my word. This is what I came here for.” The doors of the van are opened, and Michael and Jameson are dragged out and tossed into the snow. Both of them look awful, covered in dirt and blood. Jameson is not conscious, but Michael is, and he is staring at Ruthie with hate-filled eyes.
Focusing all my power, everything I can get to on Michael, I send my shadows into him.
‘Do not move boy, listen to me carefully. As you can see, Ruthie is the spy and Nika is the one that Light has been possessing. Iza must know, do you understand me? Do not let her know you heard her confession, play dumb. Get her to Iza; this is something she must deal with. Understand?’
‘But how will we save you?’ The question is faint but clear.
It is a testament to how easily Iza and I communicate, him asking that one question causes him pain.
‘There will be no saving me.’ Something I knew the minute I decided to come here. Iza is more valuable than I shall ever be, and my life is nothing compared to hers. Meeting Michael’s eyes he gives the barest hint of a nod and closes his eyes. Ruthie did not see him looking at her in such a way. For the moment her deception is still in play.
Until Michael gets to Iza.
Rough hands grab me and toss me into the smelly van. The last thing I see is the smirk on Ruthie’s face right before she starts smacking herself in the face and crying. This is going to break Iza’s heart, and I will not be there to hug her.
The Guide slides in the van beside me and momentarily freezes. His eyes change from a dull gold to a bright, familiar white and meet mine. “Hello, brother.”
I za
THE STABBING FEELING of something being wrong drags me from sleep. Sitting up I stretch and look around the room. No Phobe, no Adriem… no anyone. That’s weird. The feeling in my stomach intensifies, something isn’t right. Climbing to my feet I leave the room and go to Adriem’s room, but there’s no answer. Michael and Ruthie’s rooms are empty as well.
“What are you doing up? You should be resting,” Adriem says from the stairs.
“Where’s Phobe?”
“He said he had some errands to run and sent me to get you a new phone.” He hands me the phone box and waits for me to open it and turn it on. “I put the sim card in it already, so you should have access to all of your contacts and everything.” When I turn it on, there are ten missed calls.
Curious and concerned, I call the number back.
“Adriem? Phobe? You have to hurry because they have Iza. She came and traded herself for us!” The dread intensifies. There is only one person who can fool people by pretending to be me. Only one. I mute the line and look at Adriem.
“Pretend that I’m not here, understand?” He frowns but nods.
He puts his ear up to the phone and says, “Hello?”
“Oh god, Adriem, they have Iza, and they let us go. You have to come and get us.” I can hear her clearly through the phone as she recites the address through bouts of sobbing. I want to run to her and comfort her, but my gut tells me it’s important for them all to think I’m captured. That instinct concerns me.
“We’ll be right there to get you. Stay put,” he reassures her and ends the call. Without missing a beat, he asks me, “What’s going on, Iza?”
“Someone who looks like me showed up to make the exchange.” Every word out of my mouth makes my stomach sink lower. The skin all over my body feels like it’s going to crawl off. The low pounding pain in my head is getting steadily worse, and the wrong feeling is making my stomach do flip-flops. I’m going to break Phobe’s jaw again when I get ahold of him. How dare he go in my place… that fucking asshole, that… wonderful man, who knew he was walking into a trap.
My eyes burn, and I rub my palms into them. They’ll hurt him when they find out he isn’t me. Yes, I know he heals incredibly fast, but pain is still pain, and I’ve got this feeling of surety that it won’t be the same as before. That whoever is running this shit show, can genuinely hurt him. Gah, that idiot. Why did he do it after telling me I couldn’t? Shaking my head, I stomp into my room for my shoes. Something on the bed catches my attention. When I see it, the sudden weakness in my legs sinks me to the bed, and I pick it up.
My hand is shaking so hard I drop it, then pick it up again, bringing it up to my face to stare at it through the blurriness of my eyes. It’s a ring. He left me a fucking ring.
Carefully, I take it out of the box and hold it between my fingers. The tears are scalding as they trail down my face. Burning their way down my chin and under my shirt. He left me a ring because he was going to ask me to marry him, he paid attention to our conversation. I only told him about a dream I had as a kid. A dream of a white dress and baby dragons throwing flowers all over the place.
He got me a fucking ring.
“Iza?” Adriem calls softly from the other side of my door.
Swallowing the sob that wants to push its way out, I wipe my face with my sleeve, and I shove the ring on my finger. Ignoring the sting of it scraping across my knuckle, I keep going until it rests at the bottom of my finger. The blood will just mark it more as mine.
Taking a deep breath in, as I get up, I then exhale and gather the shreds of my composure around me like armor. I can cry later, when he’s here, and his arms are wrapped around me, telling me how I’m an idiot for worrying about the immortal Phobe. I’ll try my best to kick his ass too after I kiss the shit out of him.
“I’m coming. Let’s go get the kids and figure out how to get my stupid boyfriend back,” I say as I open the door and walk by him towards the car. This strikes me as too easy, all of it. They gave up their hostages once they had “me.” Which isn’t sitting right on my mind. For once in my life, my worry is outweighing my anger, I have to get through this weighted, nasty feeling that makes me think the world is going to end—my world is going to end—maybe then I can get mad enough to break some shit.
WHEN WE PULL into the parking lot of the lake, Ruthie comes running to the car. She stops when she sees me and stands there looking confused. Her face is a little beat up, her lips swollen from a smack or two. Maybe her stay with them wasn’t as easy as I first thought? Michael is slowly walking towards us with an unconscious Jameson slung on his back. Adriem grabs Jameson and rushes to take get him in the car. Surprisingly, Michael heads straight for me, walking right past Ruthie like she isn’t there.
Before I know it, he wraps his arms around me and hugs me so tight it’s hard to breathe. I hug him back, confused at what he’s doing, Michael has never been physically affectionate with me before. With his mouth right next to my ear, he whispers, so low that I barely hear him, “Ruthie is the one who sold us out.” The world falls out from under me. Ruthie? “Nika is the one getting possessed. He wanted you to know.”
He pulls away from me and stands there for a few seconds, his much older eyes holding mine. Speaking volumes about what happened while they were prisoners. Michael’s world has been turned upside down, his heart broken. Poor kid. Turning, he goes to the car, giving Ruthie—who’s trying to latch onto him, a wide berth.
I stand there staring at her, afraid to speak because of what will come out of my mouth. Beautiful Ruthie? The fragile girl I pulled from a trunk and rescued from a pack of shifters that wanted to turn her into their sex chew toy? The girl I buy anything and everything she asks for? The girl I love like family? She deceived me—us so convincingly that no one knew or even suspected? Then again, why would we? I brought her into the Sidhe; I vouched for her, I loved her. Gritting my teeth, I fight the confusing emotions sweeping through me, that is quickly turning into one solid mass of rage. They have Phobe because of her, they tortured Jameson and Michael, because of her.
An eighteen-year-old girl that I loved and gave a home to… betrayed me, and for what? If it’s something utterly stupid, which is unfair because any answer she gives will be considered utterly stupid, I’m going to punch her right in her back-stabbing, hormonal face.
“How are you here? I saw them take you,” she finally says, hesitantly approaching me. Now her brain is working; I can see the thoughts chasing themselves across her face. I’m not sure her thinking is the best process, she didn’t once consider that Michael might see what she did as wrong.
“Do you truly hate me so much, Ruthie?” I ask softly, stepping towards her. Wisely she takes a few steps back, and I stop. If I get any closer to her, I will hurt her, and I’m not sure how I’ll feel if I do that.
“What are you talking about? Of course, I don’t hate you.” Her eyes are wider now. Fear is leaking out of her and filling the air around her. It’s true, I can see it in her eyes, the deceit of the words she’s getting ready to give me. The Web, faint but still very much there, twangs, notes of discord and anger, all directed at Ruthie. I’m not the only one feeling the sting of betrayal.
I look to Adriem who’s standing a few feet behind her, his eyes glowing with anger. Michael must have said something. “Adriem, grab her and,” I grit my teeth, “put her in the trunk.” I fight to keep my voice calm, to keep from taking those last few steps and shaking the piss right out of her. “We’re going to the Sidhe. I can’t get Phobe back in this condition.” Adriem grabs her and drags her to the back of the car.
“I didn’t do anything wrong! Let go of me! Iza, make him let go of me! Michael—Michael he’s hurting me! Save me!” Unable to deal with the noise from her and the noise in my head at the same time, I walk up to the car and punch her in the face. She goes limp in his arms and tosses her in the trunk and shuts it with a resounding bang.
Stopping next to the passenger window I say, “Are you sure, Michael?” I’ve got to ask because I think part of me is still in some weird state of shock and disbelief.
