She Had It All, page 10
Aunt Princy:
You need a break from the farm, my baby. I cannot see you so weak. If you remain upset, you will cause distress to everyone back there. Come and stay with us, you can visit them once in a while to check on all their well-being.
Sarah:
I cannot return, Aunt Princy, but I will think about it.
Sarah didn’t want to be rude to her aunt so she controlled her anger upon being asked to return to the city. There was no way she would leave her cousins, especially Kian, in that state. Meanwhile, Paul saw her waiting and joined her.
Paul:
I went to see Kian; the windows are still closed.
Sarah:
I know. The nurse told me that they will call us when the doctors are done with their checkup.
The rest of the family met them in the waiting lobby.
Petros:
Sarah, are you okay? We are sorry that we didn’t inform you immediately about everything that went down at the wedding.
Sarah:
Don’t apologize to me, please. I am upset but I think Kian is the priority right now.
Sarah didn’t want anyone to know how disappointed she was with them for not acquainting her with promptness. Meanwhile, the Head Nurse approached and asked the family to assemble in the doctor’s room. Frank’s doctor friend and other assisting doctors were present already. Frank thanked the neurosurgeon for arriving as soon as he could and for extending that favor toward Frank’s girlfriend’s family.
Everybody was sitting, waiting nervously to get an update on Kian’s progress.
The Doctor:
We have gathered you all here to communicate crucial information. The poison in Kian’s body is remarkably strong and is spreading fast, shutting one organ after the other. His health is beyond recovery and moving him into any bigger hospital will not be useful. So, as a family, I want you to think if you would want to give the hospital permission to donate his remaining working organs. They might save a few lives.
They all were put in a state of utter shock and couldn’t believe their ears. Pearl was enraged hearing such a statement and screamed at Frank.
Pearl:
This is your best doctor? Last night, you assured me that he will come and save my brother’s life and now he is asking us to donate his organs?
Asking us to make this decision when our brother is alive?
Pearl left the room and Frank followed her. Sarah’s heart sank deeper, Paul could hardly comprehend what the doctor meant, Mary couldn’t believe the doctors had given up, and Petros felt like he was hit by a moving bus. While trying to keep his composure, Petros asked the doctor.
Petros:
How much time do we have?
The Doctor:
Maybe 48 hours.
Petros:
Kindly give my family some time to think through this.
Petros looked at his family who looked like all the color from their life was snatched. He asked everybody to return to the grand house to discuss it more privately. They asked Sarah to leave Kian for a while and come home.
Sarah went to see Kian from the visitors’ window and whispered in her broken voice.
Sarah:
Hang in there, my champion. I am coming back.
Upon reaching the farm, Sarah excused herself to be alone for some time and the family understood and let her be. She went to the workshop and found it locked, later walked toward the Connex and found it locked too. Memories came gushing in the form of tears. The hope that Kian would be a free bird again had come shattering down. When she reached the cottage, she found his slippers at the doorstep. This cottage was his, even when Sarah had physically occupied this place, it was Kian’s in essence. Every nook and corner of this house reminded her of him. The dining table at which they had coffee meetings, his books and his sculptures in the living room, his pictures on the wall from different events, everything suddenly spoke to Sarah about the immense void it would leave in her heart if Kian didn’t return to own this space.
Her heart was heavy as it had never known a loss like this. It pained her to not be in a position to resurrect him from the coma. She dragged her body to the shower and sat under it and could feel her body warming up. She didn’t want to unpack her suitcase to find something to wear, so she directly went to Kian’s closet and found the same track pants and long-sleeves shirt to wear that she wore on the first day at the farm. In a flash, she remembered the second letter that Kian had written which she had ignored reading for an extended time. For a moment, she loathed herself for having avoided reading the letter because she was too scared that it would have more bad news.
Sarah rapidly unpacked her suitcase to find the notebook in which the letter was kept. She began reading with eyes welled up and hands shivering.
“My dearest cousin Sarah,
I hate calling you cousin, by the way.
Please tell me you have forgiven us. If you are reading this letter, I am sure your anger has reduced a little and you have found a way to deal with the past and move toward a brighter future.
I am going to write some of my feelings here in this letter which I am too shy to tell in person. I had these feelings with me since long time but because of the culture and society, I could not talk about it or restrict myself. I never found the right time nor the right words to explain what I feel, so this is my first attempt at writing a love letter. Pardon me if you find this inappropriate.
First of all, I have never known the madness that love is, certainly not of this magnitude. Because of you, I feel wonderfully happy and think about you all day, all night. You are the sweetest angel who was sent to earth to fill my life with colors. I cannot thank you enough for deciding to stay with us on the farm; every day since then I have only fallen deeper in love. You were always around when I needed a shoulder to lean on and to patiently listen to my problems.
All my life, I thought I was a strong and tough man but in front of you, I have become a carefree child again. I promise to hold your hand and walk the tightest ropes of life. I will always be there to give warm and fuzzy comfort when life becomes too cold.
I will be here. For you, for me, for us. Please call me if you feel the same. I will be waiting. With a tight hug and lots of love,
Kian.”
Sarah was breathing heavily and yet the lump in her throat choked her. The letter carried Kian’s smell, she held it close to her heart and cried her eyes out. The last line…the last line said he was waiting for her call. All this while he had been patiently waiting. He wanted to know if Sarah felt the same way and was as madly in love. He waited to know if they could spend their lives together. Poor Kian had been waiting. She had a flashback of the times that Kian had flirted with her, called her a princess or an angel, and especially the evening on the beach where they shared a tight hug. She had felt the heat between them and now she could put a name to it – it was love. It was love from the first day.
Something within her changed as quick as a switch going off. She wiped her tears, stood up, and spoke to the air with a voice so strong the gods could have heard her.
Sarah:
I won’t let Kian leave us as Patrick left us. I won’t let this family’s history repeat.
She changed into her clothes and ran to the grand house as fast as her feet could permit. She walked into the house with such confidence that it made the air dense. Everybody turned their heads as she approached them in the main hall.
Petros:
Good that you are here.
Mary saw her and instantly recognized the rise of the phoenix. She asked Sarah to have a cup of tea and some banana cake as she pulled out a tray from the dining table. Sarah took a sip to clear her throat.
Sarah:
So, I think the decision is clear?
Petros:
I am sure that if he was here now and one of us in the hospital, he would take the same decision like the one we have taken – to go ahead and sign his body up for donation. His remaining organs can save some lives and we will have a piece of Kian live in this world through these people.
Paul was aggravated by his brother’s thinking and raised his voice for the first time against Petros.
Paul:
We? We? It’s you who wants this, we never concurred.
Petros:
Paul, please don’t start again!
Sarah silently looked at Pearl and Pearl responded.
Pearl:
I don’t know. I want him back but I can’t see him in pain.
Sarah got up from the sofa and addressed everyone, looking at them one by one.
Sarah:
Let’s not rush into anything, please. I don’t want to sound uncompassionate, but Kian is the one we should try to save, not the others who are queued up on the organ donation list. Only one doctor has shut his doors on Kian’s recovery, there are hundreds that we haven’t even approached yet for a second consultation. (She paused as her voice started to shake a little and with commitment asked.) Where is your faith in the Almighty? What about trusting and hoping that miracles happen? Why should we directly approach the end and not maneuver through the struggle of fighting for Kian’s life? (Sarah looked at Petros with stone-cold eyes) If he was here and one of us was lying helpless in the hospital, he would have fought for our life till the last ounce of hope in his body.
Everybody got up from where they were sitting and unanimously agreed with Sarah. One could hear them cry, “She is right!”
Paul:
I am one hundred percent with Sarah and won’t give up on my brother just like that.
Petros understood that his family was way too emotionally invested and at that moment, they couldn’t be practical. However, he asked Paul to come along and inform the hospital officials of their decision. Sarah insisted on joining but Petros declined.
Petros:
Trust me, I am not going to harm my brother.
Sarah:
I am sure you won’t. I need to see him. That is all.
Sarah didn’t want to believe Petros or anyone who would want to take Kian away from her. In the hospital, Paul went to check on Kian, while Sarah accompanied Petros to notify the doctors of their decision. She was paranoid and sad that she was keeping an eye on Kian’s immediate brother but she wanted to make sure nobody decided for Kian’s life and death apart from God. They finished all the formalities at the hospital to not pull the plug on Kian for as long as it would take.
After a while, she went to see him. He was still lying on that bed with tubes pumping air into him. It was strange how just a couple of days ago, she was running away from him and his letter, and now she was sitting in front of his unconscious body, hoping and praying that he would wake up and ask her to take him home.
Chapter16
The End
Sometimes, life throws too many curve balls that we do not know how to dodge, but we still hold our composure and walk into the endgame.
As the kith and kin were not allowed to enter a patient’s room, Paul pulled out some old contacts and sought permission from his father’s old friend who was the Head of the Hospital. Meanwhile, Sarah was talking to the nurses regarding a few issues. Later, they were granted a permit to go meet Kian in his room one by one; provided, they were fully covered in medical gowns to protect Kian from catching any allergies.
Petros was the first one to see him, followed by Paul. They asked if Sarah wanted to go in and return quickly so that they could all head back home to rest for the night. Sarah was scared of the limited time Kian had which the surgeon had mentioned the other day. She told the brothers that she wanted to stay in the hospital, but Petros didn’t think it was safe.
Petros:
We can’t leave you alone especially at night.
Sarah:
Don’t worry about me. I have checked with the nurses, the room next to Kian’s is empty and I can rest there for the night. Please let me stay. I want him to know we are here for him.
Paul:
I think that’s great. We will make a schedule so that everybody can take turns to be around Kian during the night-time.
Sarah:
Yes, brilliant.
Paul knew Sarah would do whatever her heart commanded hence he came up with that plan. The brothers left for the farm, and Sarah asked for the medical gown so that she could go spend some time with Kian in peace. The same nurse who had asked about Sarah’s relationship with Kian was on duty that night. When she came in to check his vitals, Sarah was sitting near the patient’s bedside in silence.
The Nurse:
Did you know that a patient in a coma can hear us? Speak to him.
Sarah’s eyes twinkled for a moment. After the nurse left, she took the crumpled and tear-stained second letter from the bag and felt a tear roll down her rosy cheeks. She held Kian’s hand and was mumbling something in a quivery voice.
Sarah:
I am sorry I didn’t call you in time. From now on, I will call on your number every day till you pick up my call. I don’t want you to miss anything so I am going to leave audio journals of what is happening. I won’t let go of you so easily, my friend. You are the only one who accepted me without being judgmental and filled every moment with joy. I am right here beside you, in good times and bad. Tonight, we are neighbors again. I will be sleeping in the next room, and if you decide to wake up, you will have me around.
Sarah left the room, stifling her cries and the nurse was outside to assist her to remove the gown.
The Nurse:
I can foresee that one day when people will be helping you wear a wedding gown, Kian will try to sneak in to have a look at his bride.
That put a smile on Sarah’s face.
Sarah:
What’s your name, dear? How do you manage to be so strong even when you see people’s hearts breaking every day in this hospital and still find encouraging words to tell them?
The Nurse:
My name is Zara. Someday, maybe, I will tell you my story and you will know where I derive this courage from.
Sarah:
Sure, Zara. I appreciate your work and will surely want to know more.
Zara showed Sarah the next room and gave her a blanket to sleep. She also sent complimentary food, but it was too tasteless to finish. It was an uncomfortable bed, but Sarah was just happy that she was near to Kian. She knew she wasn’t going to lose her love, but knew it was going to be a long process to recover from the emotional and physical trauma. She slept peacefully.
While the world was asleep, Kian moved his little finger. Only movement his body had shown since the consumption of that poison. Nobody was there to notice it.
A week passed, Kian’s body hadn’t shown improvement, but he had outlived the deadline the doctor had given. The family took turns to spend time with Kian and they all talked about their sweet childhood and encouraged him to wake up from his sleep. They also had many other guests during the morning hours who would come to express their regards for his health.
When it was Sarah’s turn again, Frank visited the hospital to check on Kian. Sarah was sitting beside Kian on his bed, busy recording a message to send to his number.
Frank:
Morning, how are you both doing? If you are busy, I can come back in sometime.
Sarah:
Oh no, Frank. I was just sending a voice note to Kian’s number. I send one every day so that he doesn’t miss anything while he is asleep. He will listen to these when he wakes up.
Frank:
Wow. That’s romantic. Alright, so I came to inform you that we are heading back to different cities to proceed with the interviews. I am leaving tomorrow, and you can prepare yourself to leave in two days.
Sarah:
That’s great news, Frank! But I am sorry to say that I need to be here with Kian. I will not be in a position to continue with you on this journey.
Frank:
Be practical, Sarah. You are good at your job and the entire family is here to look after Kian. The nurses can play your voice recordings for him, perhaps. This work is a lifetime opportunity for you, don’t ruin it due to sentimentality.
Sarah:
With due respect to you, I exactly know what I want to do in life. I know my priorities and where my presence is needed the most. I am sure life will bring me opportunities aplenty and I would want Kian to be by my side.
Frank went on to try one more time but they both saw Kian move his fingers again. Sarah stepped aside from the bed and noticed the movement in the other hand too. She immediately called in the nurse and asked her to alert the doctor-in-charge. Her excitement knew no bounds, and Frank was ecstatic as well.
The team had arrived at the unit in under three minutes and asked the visitors to step aside to advance with their checkup. As they were waiting outside, Sarah was crying tears of joy.
Frank:
Do you love him? Or is this pretense?
Sarah:
Even if I weren’t in love, I would do anything to bring him back to life. Kian has been a pillar of support since my first day at the farm. He is the only one who has touched my soul.
Frank:
Not to sound crude, but will you still be able to stick around if he wakes up and his body is ruined? What if he cannot talk or walk or do anything by himself? Would you still want a life with a person like that?
Sarah (chuckling at his audacity):
Now I am hundred percent sure you don’t understand me or any other woman, for that matter.
Frank:
Apologies if that was insensitive. I am only concerned about your future. You are excellent at your job and you shouldn’t risk it. I have had too many women work for me but they always have an ulterior motive behind it, either money or social stature, but you are so different and motivated. I have given you the big break without even checking if you will be capable of handling the work. I think my requests should be considered as priority.
Sarah (trying to be polite):
Thank you for all that you have done, Frank. Please do not insist as the decision has been made already. I am not leaving him.
Frank:
Will you come with me if he dies?
