Monstrous Intent, page 25
“Looks like it’s about a three-hour drive so you can sleep. I’ll remain on lookout,” he says.
I shake my head because there’s absolutely no way he thinks he’s back to normal. “No, you need to recover a whole lot more than I do.”
“No, I’m fine,” he assures me. “Honestly, I’m already nearly back to normal.”
I raise an eyebrow, wondering when he thinks I turned stupid enough to believe that. “Just… go to sleep.”
“No, you sleep. I must protect you.”
What the hell is with this weird obsession with protecting me? “You don’t need to protect me.”
He sighs as he leans over more and more until his head is in my lap, then he beams up at me while holding Sir Reginald’s container. Why he thinks he can get away with this, I don’t know.
Instead of reacting to his beaming smile, I set the bag with the chimera in it down on his head. It does nothing to deter the smile.
“You’ve submitted to my love,” he decides.
“I sure as hell have not,” I grumble as I pry the fish out of his hands and cram it behind his back before I’m stuck mopping up fish water when he falls asleep and drops it.
What the hell am I doing? Why am I letting him lie on me? He could lean against the wall. He could lie on the floor for all I care. So why?
With a sigh, I lean back in a way that doesn’t make my back ache and close my eyes. I don’t let myself sleep, though. I try to pay attention to the world around me, just in case something happens I need to be wary of.
Instead, my mind fixates on the warm body lying on me and why I’m submitting to this torture.
It really has been a long time since I’ve allowed myself to open up to anyone. It’s been even longer since anyone has really wanted to open up to me. Trying not to think about it, I turn my head and look out the window, planning on watching the world go by.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
LAKE
I can’t sleep. Even on Declan’s lap, I can’t get my brain to stop spinning. There’s an answer in here to all of this, yet I can’t seem to find it. Hell… I’m not sure I even fully know what the question is yet. Instead, I feel like I’m just hovering here, stuck in this endless limbo where I don’t know what is right and what is wrong. Where I should go or what I should do.
The only things that feel solid to me right now are the legs beneath me. The warmth of Declan’s body.
But is it enough? He’s right, we really are from two vastly different worlds. Is the idea of accomplishing this together merely a pipe dream?
Quickly, I push those thoughts back and try to focus on the future… on the present… and on what I need to do to end this.
With a sigh, I just fixate on the legs beneath me and push everything toxic back.
* * *
“Hey,” Declan says as he nudges me awake.
I roll onto my back and look up at his face. “My love!”
“No.” He rudely gets up, causing me to fall onto the hard seat before he starts exiting the bus, leaving me and Sir Reginald behind. Quickly, I snatch up the container and hurry after him, but he’s already left the bus.
When I finally catch up to him, he just stares at me.
“Why did my confession of love make you run?” I ask.
He gets that sour look on his face. “Because you don’t love me.”
“Hmm… I didn’t know you were allowed to regulate my feelings, but fine, fine. I don’t love you, I guess,” I say. “Sir Reginald said he loves you, though.”
“I am convinced Sir Reginald is actually just a plastic toy that’s floating in there,” Declan says.
I look at Sir Reginald who gives me a look of disbelief. He also can’t comprehend why Declan would think that. “You just don’t understand the depth of Sir Reginald’s emotions, I guess,” I say. “He’s currently looking at you in disbelief. I really don’t blame him.”
“Let’s go. We need to go somewhere so we can come up with a new plan that doesn’t involve us running for our lives.”
That’s when I see it and gasp as I grab for Declan’s hand.
“What?” he asks as he looks around, ready to whip his gun out and blast someone to smithereens.
“The country’s largest aquarium. I want to go! Sir Reginald wants to see his ancestors,” I say.
Declan seems to finally see the billboard I’d noticed right away, but weirdly doesn’t look as thrilled by it. “Are you serious?”
“Yes, please? Or do you want to rest—you probably want to rest, don’t you? Can we go after?”
“I don’t want to rest. I want to figure out our next course of action. Where we’re going, who we’re killing—”
“Fishies,” I interrupt.
“Are you really even a monster?” He stares at me incredulously. “I mean, really?”
“Oh… sorry. Ummm, how do you say fish the manly way? Ummm… I want to see the aquatic cannibalistic water sliders,” I say then give him a huge smile.
“Wow, you should get a job on an aquarium advertising team with those tempting descriptions.”
“Thank you!” I beam at him long enough that he caves. Cannibalistic water sliders really did seem to sell it because he sighs and starts walking toward the aquarium.
I’m nearly vibrating with the thought of getting to walk through the aquarium with him.
“You realize they’re not going to let you carry your fish in, right? You’ll have to put him somewhere,” he says.
“Yeah, in your bag. Mittens can watch him,” I decide.
“I’m not carrying your jug of fish water and this stupid creature through an aquarium.”
“How else will they get to enjoy it?” I ask, and as soon as we get near the place, I unzip his bag and squeeze Sir Reginald in with Mittens.
“We’re going to get caught carrying this shit and the weapons,” he says quietly as we walk in.
“Nah, it’ll be fine,” I assure him as I leave him with the bag and hurry over to buy the tickets. They cost more than we should spend, but it’s too late. I’ve already made up my mind, we’re going to stare at some water sliders if it’s the last thing I do.
DECLAN
What the hell am I doing? We should be planning and fighting against this and on the lookout for hunters.
Instead, Lake gives me one look, and I immediately cave and give him what he wants. What is wrong with me?
I put my rifle case—that thankfully looks more like a briefcase—in a locker but keep my handgun on my body while Lake goes to buy tickets. When I step out, I see him rushing toward me, tickets in hand and pure delight on his face. It’s enough to make me shake my head. How the hell can this delight him so much? It’s just stupid fish.
He ushers me inside and no one seems to pay any mind to the bag that he tries taking from me. “I’ll carry it. Your back needs to heal,” he says.
“I can carry it,” I say, but he yanks it from me with his ridiculous strength that I forget about when he says things like “Fishies.”
“Don’t be so stubborn,” he says as he slings the bag across his shoulders.
“If you hear your fish’s container opening, the chimera is trying to eat it.”
“She wouldn’t do that!” he says, like he’s really going to trust the creature that tried blinding him and tearing his cheek off.
Before I can remind him of that, he reaches back and grabs my hand. “Come on! We have to see it all.”
I look down at the warm fingers wrapped around mine as I question my sanity level while I’m dragged off. “This isn’t a date.”
“Yeah, it is,” he says as he squeezes my hand. Not in a “You’re so sweet, I love holding your hand” way but almost in a threatening way, like “I will squeeze your hand if you try to pull away from me.”
Even so, I give it a valiant effort to no avail and finally submit to holding his hand. There’s something odd about it. Like I feel a little awkward because I’m not sure I’ve ever held hands with anyone in a public place, but I also don’t hate it.
Lake gasps as he rushes into a grand room with a huge aquarium in the middle, dragging me after him as he goes. The gigantic tank fills up the room, only leaving enough space for people to walk around it. And one of the most deadly monsters I’ve ever seen rushes up, absolutely enthralled by the fish swimming around. A manta ray swims right up the side of the glass and I have to admit, it’s kind of neat.
I never got to do anything like this as a kid, and as an adult, I never thought of going to an aquarium alone.
“He’s so big,” Lake says as the ray glides on by.
“Have you ever been to an aquarium?” I ask.
“No! You?”
I shake my head. “Why haven’t you?”
“I wasn’t allowed to do frivolous things like this. My lifestyle was extremely strict,” he says.
“So was mine,” I say as I trail after him while he walks around the huge tank.
“But the place we lived had some books, and one of them was about the ocean that had little bits of information about aquatic life, and I read that stupid book so many times growing up.”
“So why just Fish Stick, then? Why not pack that huge tank you had full of fish?”
“Well… I guess because when I went to the pet store, I saw him in this tiny cup with barely any water in it. He had to keep his fins tucked against himself or they’d be out of the water. I knew he’d die if he was left there much longer. And I kind of just… understood, you know? What it feels like to be stuck in such a small space… what it was like to be confined and to wonder what it’d be like to be free. I wanted him to know what it felt like to suddenly have a whole world open up,” he says.
I get it more than he’ll ever realize. “That’s how working for Jameson felt at first,” I say. “He gave me a place off the streets, but I never realized how I was just walking right into a suffocating world.”
“You don’t talk much about that time,” he says.
I just shrug and pull my hand away, and this time he lets it go.
“You know you don’t have to keep a wall between everyone, right? You are allowed to break down that wall just a little,” Lake says as he starts walking deeper into the aquarium.
My hand feels weirdly cold now that his is gone.
“I’m fine how I am,” I say, feeling determined.
“Are you? When I first met you, you were fixated on this idea of normalcy. Of getting away from all of that hunter stuff, but is it more that you long for a family? For someone to care for? Because believe it or not, you look a whole hell of a lot happier running around with me than you did when I met you.”
“I don’t believe it,” I say quickly, because he has a stupid impression of me.
He just laughs and hurries up to another tank. “Ooh, this fish looks like you!”
I look over at the ugliest fish I’ve ever seen. “Does it?”
“It’s got that same sulky look! It glares just like you too!” he says.
“Ha. Funny.”
Lake grins as he moves to the next tank. “Does your face ever hurt from sulking so much?”
“No, I have perfectly toned face muscles,” I assure him.
That makes him laugh, which for some reason makes me smile. “I don’t know. It’s doing something to my loins every time you turn it on me, so they must be working out for you.”
“You’re ridiculous,” I decide.
“Maybe, but so are you. We can just be merrily ridiculous together.”
I notice a sign and point. “You can touch a stingray.”
His head snaps to the sign. “Yessss. We should steal one.”
“What? Can you imagine trying to run around with a freaking stingray as well?”
“Fine, I’ll settle for touching one,” he says as he hurries off. Waiting in line seems to be worse for him than nearly getting murdered by chimeras. He keeps sighing, and when I see the bag on his back move, I jab it with my finger, hoping the thing realizes it needs to stay still or I’m letting it loose in the shark tank.
When we finally get to the front, he hurries over to the large open tank and peers in at the stingrays. As one swims by, he tentatively reaches in to pet it before giving me the most genuine smile. “Declan, touch it! It feels so neat!”
“Yeah,” I say as I grudgingly reach in and touch one as it swims by. I’m not quite sure what is so exciting about it, but the pure happiness on his face makes me stick my hand back in and touch another. I guess they’re kind of neat to touch.
“Look how small that one is,” he says as he points.
I look over as Mittens tries cramming her head through the zipper opening while licking her chops. I shove her head back in, hoping no one noticed. “Don’t forget that I will make mittens out of you,” I whisper.
She lets out a displeased noise and settles back down.
“I can’t call that stupid thing… Mittens.”
“But I thought it was a threat. That should make you feel better about it,” Lake teases.
“True. I could make a full-body suit out of you.”
“Aww, you want to wear me, how romantic,” he says.
I realize that I will never win. No matter what I say or do, I will somehow find myself giving in to this monster.
CHAPTER THIRTY
LAKE
I’m disappointed when we reach the end of the aquarium because I’m not prepared to face reality again. I want to drag Declan off to something else where we’ll forget everything wrong in the world for a few more minutes. Instead, I follow him over to a hotel where we’ll make our place to camp while we reassess things. Honestly, I don’t feel like reassessing shit.
“What about dinner?” I ask, deciding anything sounds better than this.
“What? You’re hungry again? Your rubbery turtle-shaped chicken nuggets weren’t enough?”
“Half of them were decapitated, the other half were burnt. I was not pleased. Steak. Rare steak. Yessss,” I decide as I set up Sir Reginald’s spot by shoving everything off the bedside table.
Mittens is checking out the room by scaling the curtains.
“I’ll order it,” I announce as I hurry for the door.
“We don’t have enough money left for steak.”
“Fine… fast food. I’ll be back,” I say, and then slip out the door in a hurry. I don’t get far before Declan comes jogging after me.
“What has gotten into you?” he asks.
I stare at him as I slow. “Nothing.”
His stare back is quite impressive and almost immediately makes me cave.
“I just feel restless.”
“You were able to shift recently, so then what else is it?” he asks.
“Maybe just because it’s been so long, I don’t know. You know what I always say, fighting or fucking will sate me,” I say as I elbow him in the hopes he’ll get the hint.
“What about a cheap taco?”
“I can tackle a taco,” I agree as I follow him.
When we get outside, we walk across the street and get some fast food that we eat on the walk back, but I still have that uneasy feeling inside me. I can’t even be distracted by the fact that I noticed he got extra for Mittens, though he’ll never admit to it.
About halfway back, I notice he’s fixated on his phone, probably texting Emma who seems to be concerned about us like the adorable pet she is. But simply trailing after him to that hotel seems almost daunting.
He’s staring at the phone closely enough that I slip into a doorway and listen to him walk off without me. Then I turn into an alleyway and briskly walk to the end of it. He seems to have noticed I’m gone now. If I listen carefully enough, I can hear his footsteps as he walks back toward where he last saw me.
Declan doesn’t call for me, no, he understands that he’s the hunter and I’m the prey, and you never make yourself known to your prey before you’re ready to strike.
Fuck, do I want to be the hunter… but no… nope. I’m not a monster. I’m not like my siblings. I’m Lake. I am—
How the hell did he get over there? I thought I was tracking him. Did he fool me?
Quickly, I turn around the corner and take off running, though in this dense city without darkness to aid me, I have few places to go in this human form, but I keep moving.
I hear a noise behind me and hesitate before turning, realizing that I’m really not back to my fully healed self if I didn’t notice him until he slams me into the wall.
“What are you doing?” he asks, voice growly.
“Waiting for you,” I say as I grab him around the back of the neck and yank him into me as I press my lips against his.
At first, he considers pulling away. He can’t keep up his grumpy guy routine if he caves, but it’s too much, even for him. His mouth presses hard against me, his lips parting as his tongue brushes and tangles against mine. There’s nothing gentle about the kiss as we fight for dominance. I’m more than willing to give it to him, but I want him to fight for it. I want him to show me how much he wants me. How much he desires me.
And then he breaks away as he draws my arm in and sends me stumbling down the alleyway, leaving me startled about how my merry kiss became an attack. Is he pissed? Is he mad he finally gave in?
I catch his eyes and I realize that I’m very, very wrong. He’s not pissed at all. He’s loving the hunt. He moves toward me, but I slide to the side faster than he expects and shove my groin against his ass as I wrap a hand around his throat, careful not to press against his back.
“You think you’re quick enough?” I ask, breath against his ear. He pushes back hard, sliding a leg between mine and hooking it as he turns and presses himself against me.
“I know I’m quick enough,” he says, mouth inches from mine. My eyes are fixated on his lips but when he doesn’t move in, they jump up to hold on to his. He grins at me, and I realize just how much he’s toying with me. “I will not fuck a monster.”
