Pocket Dungeon 3, page 10
“Of course,” she said. “As best as I am able.”
“Does he have any cameras?” I asked. “Something we need to be aware of to avoid being seen?”
Elaene furrowed her brow in thought for a few long seconds before she finally nodded.
“Yes,” she said. “They are not aimed inside the rooms, but at the doorways outside them.”
“So, we need to figure out how to keep from getting caught on the security cameras, too,” I said as I mulled over her words. “Do you know if the alarm system on the doors still works if there’s no power to the building? I know it’s a weird question.”
It was sort of a crazy idea, but I had a plan beginning to brew.
“There was a bad storm not long ago…” Elaene said as she crinkled her brow in thought. “Very much lightning was around, and all of the house shut down because of this. It was so dark and silent. Like an impenetrable fortress, Archibald was frustrated that no security was working. He ordered his guards to keep close watch on the perimeter. Does that help?”
“It does.” I nodded vigorously. “That means we just need to make sure we make it inside, and then find a way to cut the power. That should ensure the cameras are no longer an issue.”
“How would we manage that?” Iris asked with a small, concerned frown.
“We use the crystal,” I said as my brain started going a mile a minute. “Not for long. Just go in, go back out. Long enough it will knock off the power to the surrounding area. That way we don’t have to waste time sneaking around and trying to find where we can actually turn the cameras off, and we can just get in and do what we came to do. Then all we have to worry about is the guards.”
“I think that will actually work,” Elaene said slowly. “But how will we use the key without being seen? There is a camera outside the home.”
“I have that figured out too,” I said. “If these assholes can bring items out of the dungeons to use and they retain their ability, why can’t I? I’ll bring out the Ring of Invisibility, use that while I unlock the place, and then, boom, power outage.”
“I quite like this plan,” Yasha said. “It is very clever.”
“Thanks, I tried. But then there’s the next big question: After we get in and free the women, we head to the safe to get the crystal. Which introduces a whole other issue.” I sighed. “How the hell do we get into the safe?”
“I can help with that,” Elaene said with a glitter of excitement in her eyes. “I am capable of burning through the walls of the safe.”
I was momentarily taken aback.
“Wait, burning?” I repeated. “Like with fire?”
“No,” Elaene said. “Acid. I am capable of spitting acid strong enough to burn through many layers of metal.”
Well. I couldn’t say I’d been expecting that.
“I’m sorry, you can what?” Iris said, and perfectly captured my own astonishment.
“I can spray acid from my mouth,” Elaene repeated.
“Why did you not use that skill to escape the tank?” Yasha asked with slight annoyance. “If it is strong enough to burn through metal, then surely glass is no great feat…”
“I’m pretty sure acid can’t dissolve glass,” I said as I racked my brain. “Maybe like… one kind can, but–”
“Mine can,” Elaene said, but then she sighed. “Unfortunately, it is also neutralized by water, so I was still unable to free myself. But my ability may be useful after we enter Archibald’s home.”
“And we can’t just use your acid spray to get in, why?” I was really hoping we could avoid the public theft of a super important ring.
“If anyone attempts to access the home without using the ring, it sets off many alarms,” Elaene explained. “And we would surely be found before we could enter. It would alert the remaining security as well.”
“I’m going to take a wild guess that the safe will set off alarms once we break into it, too,” I said. “Which means we’ll have to be really fucking fast with our getaway. We get the crystal and whatever else he has stored inside and book it as quickly as we can away from the scene.”
“Then what do we do?” Yasha asked.
“Well, we’ll have temporarily prevented Black from being able to access both the dungeons to send people in, as well as the black market events, and we’ll hopefully have a lot more information on how all of this works. We can use what we learned to figure out who’s in charge, then form a plan to take the entire ring down.”
“I’m sorry we can’t outright kill him,” Iris said to Elaene, but the Atlantean woman simply nodded in understanding.
“It is more important to free his captives than murder him now,” she said. “But his time will come.”
“The best thing is, I doubt he’ll want to involve the cops after the theft, either,” I said. “I mean, sure, he could call them, but while money can buy a whole lot of discretion, I have a feeling it’s probably a big no-no in his circle of friends to involve the authorities in any of their dealings. He’d have to come up with some explanation for the crystal thing in the first place if everything in the safe is related to the dungeons, and I’ve quickly learned that crystals are a whole lot like Fight Club.”
“What?” Iris furrowed her brow.
“The first rule of having a crystal is you don’t talk about having a crystal,” I elaborated.
Yasha frowned. “But we are speaking about having a crystal now?”
“If this is a modern reference, I need you to add it to the list,” Iris said with a sigh.
Despite the undoubtedly serious nature of our conversation, I couldn’t help but grin as I stood up and walked over to the whiteboard mounted to the refrigerator a couple yards away.
The board was entirely covered with a list of things Iris, and Yasha if she was interested, needed to learn about to be fully up to speed on what I thought were the most important bits of pop culture she’d missed while trapped in the dungeon.
I quickly added Fight Club to the list.
“I understand what it is you are trying to say,” Elaene said as I made my way back over to the coffee table to sit down again. “He will be too preoccupied with maintaining his secrets to contact the authorities, and if he were to divulge these secrets, it could fare badly for him.”
“Exactly,” I said. “After all, we don’t know where he actually sits in this organization, and whoever’s at the top probably wouldn’t be too happy to learn that one of its members was out blabbing to the cops.”
“So, we use that to our advantage,” Iris said. “We go to his house while he’s unaware at the party, break in, get the women out, then get the crystal out of his safe.”
“This is kind of crazy,” I admitted. “But I think it will work. You said the event’s in three days?”
Elaene nodded.
“Alright, well, we have three days to work out any more potential kinks that might come up to make sure everything runs as smoothly as possible, but I think this will work. Elaene, is there any chance you can give us the address of this place, so we can at least know where it is, or will you have to take us there in person.”
“I do not know the address, but it was at a location they called Warehouse Fourteen. I do not know more than that,” she admitted.
Warehouse Fourteen. The name wasn’t familiar, but a quick Google search would definitely help.
“Thank you,” I said. “I’m glad you decided to come back with us, Elaene. We need to take this guy down, and we wouldn’t be able to do it without you.”
The Atlantean offered me a slight smile, and while she was still sitting a little awkwardly on the couch, her posture had relaxed a little over the course of our conversation, and she looked less like she was about to crawl out of her own skin.
Baby steps.
“May I show Elaene the Star Wars now?” Yasha asked, and before I could even answer, the fox-woman had already snagged the remote from the arm of the couch and started navigating the Disney+ app like a pro.
I couldn’t help but snort and gestured for her to go ahead as I moved off the coffee table.
“Have at it,” I told her. “I’m going to sort through this gold and get it ready for Monty. Do you think you could bring it to him tomorrow, Iris?”
“Yeah,” the blonde said as she moved off the coffee table as well. “I think he should have a deposit ready for you soon, too.”
Thanks to saving Monty from being murdered by Harper, he’d offered me a deal I couldn’t refuse. I was now a partner in his music store, which offered me a way to bypass the whole “obvious tax fraud” thing I was desperately trying to avoid with the IRS. Plus, he’d offered to handle all of the gold exchanges for me as an added thank you for helping him out of the nasty situation he’d been in.
It was a nice added bonus on top of letting Iris hang out and work at the shop.
“Who is Monty?” Elaene looked away from Yasha and her Star Wars lecture and focused on me.
“He’s someone else who was caught in the black market stuff,” I explained. “We helped him get out, and now he helps us with the loot we bring from the dungeons. Plus, he owns a music store, which is great for Iris.”
“I tend to hang out there while Yasha and Wes go into the dungeons,” she explained to Elaene.
“You do not fight?” Elaene’s eyebrows raised in surprise.
“Not if I can help it,” Iris admitted. “I uh… don’t like to go in dungeons much. I spent more time there than I care to remember.”
“Of course,” Elaene said. “I was simply curious because, well, I do not wish to enter a dungeon again anytime soon. At least, not until I am healed.”
“If you want to come with me to the music shop, that would be great,” Iris said, and she brightened at the idea. “I can show you around, and I’m sure Monty would be glad for any extra help he can get.”
“That sounds like a good idea,” I said. “I planned on heading into another dungeon tomorrow, pretty early in the morning, so you guys can hang out there instead of just sitting around here.”
“Works for me,” Iris said and offered Elaene another smile. “I’d be glad to show you around.”
“Thank you, Iris,” the dark-haired woman said. “You are very kind.”
“Us survivors of these rich assholes have to stick together,” Iris joked, but then again, it wasn’t really a joke, was it?
A faint smile danced across my lips as I watched Iris move to sit between Elaene and an eager Yasha on the sectional couch, and I decided I’d let the women have their bonding time as I dealt with all the gold.
The rest of the night passed by in a daze of Star Wars, leftover pizza, and a lot of menial counting. Sure, Monty dealt with all the exchanges for me, but I was still a bit of a control freak, and I wanted to know exactly how much gold I had earned in each dungeon.
I knew Monty wouldn’t ever try to skim from me, not only because we were friends, but the guy was an absolutely shit liar. Still, I liked the routine I’d fallen into in the last month. It was weirdly relaxing after surviving near-death experiences in the dungeons, and especially now, as my mind buzzed over everything I’d just learned and the plan we’d come up with.
Three days. That was all there was between us and taking a giant chunk out of this horrible black market ring. The days couldn’t go by fast enough.
When morning rolled around, I barely wanted to get out of bed.
Sure, I’d planned on going into a dungeon in the early morning, but the idea of getting out of the warm blankets, tucked between two sexy women I loved, felt utterly impossible.
It was only the fact I could barely breathe past all of Yasha’s hair that eventually made me scoot out from the end of the bed and shuffle to my feet.
As soon as my spot was vacated, Yasha immediately rolled over and proceeded to half-lay on top of Iris instead of me.
I struggled to bite back a laugh as Iris began to stir and spit out Yasha’s long, reddish-gold tresses from her mouth. She blindly flailed to clear the hair off her face and pushed herself up to a seated position in a sleep heavy daze.
She blinked her dark blue eyes a few times and used the heels of her hands to rub sleep away from the corners of her eyes.
“Morning,” I said softly.
“Ugh,” Iris replied.
Yasha didn’t so much as stir.
“She’s this big,” Iris grumbled and held her fingers barely an inch apart. “How does she take up so much room?”
“I have no idea,” I admitted with another little laugh. “But I’m always afraid she’s going to suffocate me in my sleep.”
“We need a bigger bed,” Iris said. She dropped one hand down to rest lightly on Yasha’s head and began to stroke at her long, unruly hair, despite the fact she’d nearly just choked on it.
“Believe me,” I said as I grabbed a pair of clean jeans from my singular, crowded dresser drawer. I’d surrendered the rest of the dresser to Iris’ much more organized things. “It’s at the top of the list. We can obviously afford one now, the issue is space.”
To emphasize the point, I gestured around the already crowded, tiny bedroom as I pulled my jeans up with the other hand. It involved a slightly undignified bit of hopping on one foot, but Iris looked amused at the sight, and that was good enough for me.
“When do we have the open house?” she asked and leaned back against the wall that served as our headboard. So to say, we didn’t actually have a headboard.
I mentally added one of those to our shopping list as well.
“Tomorrow afternoon,” I said. “And that’s just the first place. I’ve got a few more tours lined up, but I really liked the look of this first one.”
“Where’s it at?” Iris asked between yawns.
“It’s on what we call the Magnificent Mile,” I said and buttoned my jeans. “Not too far from the Art Institute, if I’m remembering the right place.”
Iris raised her dark eyebrows until they disappeared beneath her shaggy platinum bangs. She’d been talking about needing a haircut soon, and each time she mentioned it, she sounded as giddy as a little kid.
I hadn’t even considered the fact that her hair wouldn’t have grown while she was trapped in stasis inside the dungeon, so the fact that her shag was growing out now was a cause for celebration.
“What’s that look for?” I asked. I grabbed a henley from the other side of my drawer and pulled it over my bare chest. I ruffled my own blond hair to make it look a little less disheveled after being yanked through the collar of my shirt.
“That’s expensive, isn’t it?” she asked. “Everything’s expensive now, compared to what I remember, but I think I remember the prices for places in that area when you showed me on the… the thing.”
“The laptop,” I filled in. “And it is, but it’s not like we can’t afford it, right? I think we deserve nice things. You deserve them.”
I shrugged, like it was the most obvious thing in the entire world.
“And you can’t tell me you’d rather stay in a place like this,” I said.
As if on cue, a loud thump came from our upstairs neighbor, followed by a clearly discernible string of profanity that definitely included the phrase ‘fuck you and your mother.’
Iris paused. “You have a point. And you deserve good things, too. Things are just expensive. I mean, what, thirty dollars for a vinyl? That’s horrible.”
“You might be biased,” I reminded her.
“What is vinyl?” Yasha mumbled into the pillow.
“She lives,” Iris joked. “And you know what vinyl is. It’s what I play music on.”
“Ah, the strange discs,” Yasha said as she rolled over. She spat out a strand of hair with a huff.
Well, it was nice to see that it wasn’t just me and Iris nearly suffocating from her hair.
“Come on,” I said to Yasha. “Let’s get moving so we can get into the dungeon soon.”
“I should get ready, too,” Iris said. “That way I can bring Elaene to meet Monty. Did you get the rest of the gold counted last night? I can bring it over with me.”
“I did. Put it in Monty’s old magic bag, it’s on the dresser.” I nodded over my shoulder to the bag in question, and Iris smiled with relief.
She’d been incredibly grateful the day Monty reminded us that he didn’t need his own magical bag from the dungeons anymore, and we’d been utilizing it ever since to make transferring gold as easy as possible. All Iris had to do was put the magical bag into any backpack, purse, whatever she wanted to carry.
I sat on the edge of the bed and pulled on some socks, then my usual brown boots. Usually I’d add my preferred leather jacket as the finishing touch, but it was still being repaired by some very expensive little old Italian man and wouldn’t be ready for another week.
It had been a blow to my wallet, but I was still trying to remind myself I could afford things like that now. Sure, I might have just told Iris she deserved nice things, but it was one thing to do stuff for the women I loved, and another to do them for myself.
But I loved that damn leather jacket, and after it helped keep me from even more acid damage in the dungeon we worked through before killing Harper, it had earned its repairs.
So, instead of the leather jacket, I grabbed the sherpa-trimmed Levi’s denim jacket I’d been using in its place and pulled it on instead.
While I did that, Iris and Yasha both pulled themselves out of bed and started to get dressed. It led to a slight bit of chaos in the room, and to avoid it, I grabbed a few pieces of clothing from Yasha’s mess on the floor I thought would fit Elaene and slipped into the living room.
I shut the door behind me to close off the chaotic scene and was surprised to see the Atlantean woman was already awake.
“Oh, I was just coming out here to wake you up,” I said. “I brought you some clothes I figured would fit.”
I gestured with the skirt, t-shirt, and pair of flats and set them down on the edge of the sectional opposite Elaene.
“Thank you, Wes,” she said around a yawn. She’d slept in her borrowed sweatshirt amidst a pile of blankets and looked incredibly adorable. It was sort of hard to ignore.
