Wolven, page 16
“Not that anyone ever asks for my two cents,” Nova said, “but we could all use something to keep us sane, no? We tried the isolation thing—it didn’t work. Might as well have a little fun on the side, if we’re apparently all going to fucking die anyways.”
“Jesus, Nova,” Flint muttered.
"Did you ever hear back about your date, Nova?" April asked, changing the subject.
Nova laughed, pulling out her phone.
"He wants to take me out to eat tonight," Nova answered April, scrolling across her screen. She typed out a quick message and then looked up with a sly expression. “Some place downtown, I guess. Free dinner.”
"What's happening?" Rowan turned to me, but I shook my head—this was all breaking news to me.
"Tristan and I have a date tonight," Nova said, her lips pursed. The immediate air of disapproval hardly seemed to faze her. If anything, she looked rather indignant. Especially when she met my gaze.
"Tristan?" Flint’s face twisted like he'd just stuck his tooth in a lemon. “Jade’s friend Tristan? Do you not remember what happened at Amy’s? Little dick.”
Nova laughed, nodding as she wove her dark blonde hair into a braid.
“Of course I remember,” she answered. “But like I said—a little fun.”
"Okay, but... why?" Amber spoke up, looking confused herself. "Another human?" She glanced at me. "Are you in love with him... like Clay and Jade?"
"I think he's cute," Nova answered simply. "He has nice lips. Plus, he's been asking me out since we got here. I was starting to feel bad; and I’m bored. I’ll keep him clear away from the pack, I cross my heart and hope to die.”
No one in the group liked the idea. But no one said anything else she’d made the cross on her chest, either. Flint still seemed unsure if Nova was joking or not, but based on what I knew of Nova, she really did plan on having her fun with Tristan.
I peered around the cafeteria crowd to Jade's table. Whatever it was that Tristan was saying, Jade didn't look too enthused. Elsie giggled right along, but Jade looked too concerned to take the matter as lightly as her friend did. She made a comment, and Tristan turned to her with a sneer on his face. He said something else, and Jade rolled her eyes, pulling up her middle finger. She covered her face with a visible sigh. The smile faded from Elsie's face.
What was he saying to her that made her look so unhappy? My muscles started to move before my brain could catch up, but Jag grabbed my shoulder and slammed me back down onto the bench. All eyes turned to us.
"She's a big girl," Jag commented, his eyes still on Jade's table. He'd been watching too. "Let her handle it herself." A growl rose from the back of my throat. I hated that Tristan got to be all over Jade when he wanted to, and I especially didn't like him when he upset her. "Worst case scenario, we can send Flint to punch the dick in the face again. I heard that was fucking funny."
Flint smiled, brushing off his shirt in a show of cockiness. April rolled her eyes, bringing his hand up to her lips in a soft kiss.
Nova also watched the other table, her eyes lit with interest but her face otherwise emotionless. I couldn't help but scowl at her, even if she didn't notice. Why Tristan? There were several other dudes to play around with if she wanted to. No reason for it to be that prick.
The bell rang. Students began to gather their things, rising from their seats in a synchronized cacophany to get to their next class. Nova picked herself up and made her way out into the mess, glued to her phone. I knew in that moment I should have let it go, but all my exhaustion from earlier burned up into resentment.
I caught up to Nova in the hall, grabbing her by the arm and spinning her around. She met my gaze with a lifted eyebrow, her phone pressed against her chest.
"Nova, what the fuck are you doing?" I demanded. She tilted her head innocently.
"What do you mean?"
"Seriously?" I sighed, crossing my arms. "You’re not fooling me. There's no way you'd date Tristan just to date Tristan. And not that I have to say this, but there’s no way in any circle of hell where I would contemplate adding Tristan to the pack.” Nova’s nostrils flared, but her lips remained tight. “So, what's really going on?"
"Are you asking as my Alpha or as my friend?" Nova challenged me.
I narrowed my eyes at her. "Both."
"Fine," she sniffed. She turned to continue walking, and I followed her close. Her face filled with concentrated sorrow and concern. "I told you last night that I don't think Jade is right for you., just like you don’t think Tristan is right for me. This is how I'm going to prove that Jade is still just as in love with Tristan as he is with her. You’ll see we’re both wasting our time."
“You agree with Jag, then?”
Nova stared.
“When Orion was killed, you were there for Jag. When June was killed, you were there for April. When Willow—” Nova took a calm breath. “You were there for me. You were there for us. You were our Alpha, and you were great at it. But now we’re here. Now Coal’s gone, too, and where were you? I’ve really wanted to be supportive, Clay, but most of our ring is dead now. And here you are, chasing after a human who will always love him before she loves you.”
Her words seared against my ribcage. I'd never seen Nova so bitter. I fought against a sinking heart—Nova and I used to be close, once upon a time. When we were younger, she was my closest friend out of all of them. It was only our blood status that got in the way; once my father started teaching me the ways of an Alpha, I didn’t have so much time for her.
But this—this was a shit thing for her to do.
"Jade doesn't love Tristan," I growled at her.
Nova merely shrugged, turning down the hall. As she disappeared into the throng of people, she called over her shoulder:
"We'll see, Clay. We'll see."
Jade found me in the parking lot after school let out, calling my name just as I opened my car door. Jag and Opal voiced their protest at my distraction, but they could wait ten more minutes to get home.
"Hey," I greeted Jade, kissing the top of her head as she came in for a hug. She peered behind me to look through my windows. "Jag, Opal, and Amber. What's up?"
She nodded, smiling up at me.
"I just wanted to see you for a minute, if that's okay," she said, her arms still around my waist. I brushed her cheek with my thumb, trying to curb the guilt that came at seeing the hint of a bruise on her shoulder. To anyone else it could pass as a hickey, but I knew better, and felt worse.
"Of course," I replied. "How's your day been?"
"It's been..." Jade trailed off with a frown. She shrugged, letting go of me to fold her arms over her chest. "It's been alright. I'm exhausted. Tristan's being a dick. Whatever."
I remembered watching them earlier. The way Jade scowled at Tristan for nearly all of lunch, and the nasty look on Tristan’s face as he jeered over them.
"Yeah, you guys didn't seem to be getting along all that well today," I commented.
She covered her face in a show of exasperation.
"Has Nova told you she has a date with him tonight?" Jade sighed.
"She told me about it at lunch,” I said with a nod. "She seemed... excited? Why do you ask?"
Jade looked around, as if trying to see whether or not Tristan was around to hear. But the parking lot was full of several kids trying to get home, and Tristan nor his rusty pickup were anywhere to be seen.
"He's just been such a dick since Nova agreed to go out with him," Jade told me. I lifted my eyebrows; as far as I'd known, Tristan had always been a dick. But I didn't say that to her. "Today he was talking about how ready he was to— ugh. Never mind. I don't even want to repeat it. Just do me a favor and tell Nova to be careful. Not to get her hopes up, alright? Please."
I lifted my arm to scratch the back of my head. "Yeah, about that. Nova’s not that into him, actually." Jade tilted her head at me in question. "She's..."
Jade blinked at me as my thoughts ran dry. I wasn't even sure how to put it without making Nova sound like a terrible person. Not that I approved of what she was doing, but I didn't want Jade to hate her. Even if Nova hated Jade for her own petty reasons.
"She's just playing around," I finally said. "She doesn't really like Tristan. She's just trying to make you jealous."
Jade recoiled, her eyes flying wide.
"Jealous?" she laughed, then shook her head. "Jealous of her and Tristan? What the fuck? Why?"
"She thinks you love him," I mumbled, looking down. I couldn't meet her gaze; not only because it sounded crazy as I said it out loud, but also because every time I thought about it my paranoia worsened.
"That's ridiculous," Jade exclaimed. And then she pressed her hand against my cheek. "Clay, you know that's ridiculous, right? Tristan is just a friend, history or no history. I love you."
"You're right," I said, shaking myself out. "Yes. I know that. Sorry."
"I'm yours, Clay," Jade murmured, reaching up to touch her forehead to mine. "I promise."
"You are mine," I rumbled, just to hear myself say it aloud.
We both jumped at the sound of Jag leaning forward to honk the horn. Jade chuckled as she pulled herself away from me.
"I'll let you get your friends home," she said softly. I leaned down to kiss her, and she wrapped her arms around me in a brief embrace. Then she turned to walk off. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Tomorrow," I nodded, watching her walk away. Once she was out of sight, I got back in my car. Opal stared at me as I turned the key in the ignition. "What?"
"She is a human," Opal said. Jag snorted in the back.
"Yeah, I know she's a human," I muttered, pulling out of my spot. "And you don't need to tell Ma or Pa about it, either."
"I don't have to," Opal sniffed, turning her attention to her phone. I looked sharply at her as she went on, "They already know. I heard them say this morning that they were going to talk to you about it when we got back home."
Amber and Jag met my gaze in the rearview mirror, but I said nothing. I could only imagine what my parents had planned for me. They'd told me to abandon the prospect of Jade, and I'd blatantly ignored them. I could only desperately hope that Opal was bluffing, even if it wasn’t something Opal normally did.
But she wasn't bluffing. When I pulled into the driveway, Amber and Jag took off down the street to their own houses. Both of my parents sat waiting for me in the front room; Opal cast me a meaningful look as she passed by me to get upstairs.
"Come sit down, Clay," Pa said, motioning for the sofa opposite theirs.
I tried to judge their expressions to see how much trouble I was in. But it was hard to tell; neither of them looked particularly angry or upset. But my dad’s fist was clenched, and my mom’s leg bounced incessantly. Something certainly bothered them.
"The human," my father said after a moment of silent staring. "She's still around, isn't she?"
"Her name is Jade," I said, and then cringed at my own indignance. But Pa only nodded to acknowledge my correction and waited for me to continue. "And... yes, she is. April and I talked to her when she found out about us. She's not a threat."
"I'm glad you think so, Clay," Ma murmured, looking faintly distracted.
"I don't think so," I said. They both looked at me with uncertainty, and a defensive growl rose from the back of my throat. "I know she's not a threat."
"Honestly, Clay," my father sighed, releasing the tension in his muscles. "We're not angry. We just want to understand why you've been so wrapped around her. If you’re going to put the pack in danger like this, I want there to be a good reason behind it. So go on: tell us all about her."
Faint surprise flickered at the back of my mind.
"Well... she's great, Pa," I started. "I don’t really know how to explain all of it, but everything about her that feels right. She's kind, and she’s genuine. She’s only known the ring for a few weeks but she cares about them—she’s loyal. Honestly... she makes a perfect packmate."
My parents exchanged a glance.
"What is your plan, exactly?" Ma asked, her hands clasped in her lap. "She's not a wolf, Clay. What do you expect to happen when you split off with the others? That she'll follow you blindly? That she would abandon her entire family just to be with yours?"
"Jade doesn't really have all that much family," I mumbled. "She would be more than welcome to come, either way. And I don’t—I mean... we haven’t talked in depth about it, yet.”
I stopped myself, biting my own tongue. My thoughts about turning Jade were not something I should be telling my father. Not when it was against his own laws. But his gaze demanded a response I couldn’t ignore.
"I could turn her, if that’s what she decides."
The look from my mother gave me goosebumps. But Pa's expression was worse, so void of expression I dared not repeat myself.
“I put a law against that for a reason,” Pa said.
“Your law,” I said tentatively. “When my ring splits, the laws will be mine. I can change them.”
“You’d let your ring take strays in off the street?” Ma asked. “After everything?”
“Jade is not a stray,” I snapped. All the exhaustion from earlier came rushing back upon my shoulders, dropping their heavy weights against me. “And I trust my ring. I can’t speak to the intricacies of why you put the law in place for your pack—I can only speak to the intricacies of demolishing it in mine.”
My parents shared another glance, though not a word of their thoughts. To fill the floundering emptiness in the room, I added:
“If Jade wants to turn, there’s no reason she couldn’t be at my side.”
"You've known her for three weeks, Clay," Ma said, pressing her fingers to her temples. I glued my eyes to the mallard feather tied in her hair to avoid meeting her gaze. "What in the world has made you so devoted to her?"
I struggled to find the words.
“When I was still young enough for you to be tucking me into bed,” I began, hoping to find my way as I went, “you used to tell me the story of the full moon that you and Pa knew you were meant to be together. That the moonlight that night made it so clear to you—and that one day I’d get that, too.” Ma blinked at me, the memory coloring her gaze. Pa’s hand moved to clasp hers. “The night of our first run here, Jade was there out in the woods, and I had to stop. I had to stop for her. It was exactly like you said, that knowing.”
Silence again. I hated when they did this. I was too afraid to look up at them; afraid their faces would tell me of all the dreadful things they were thinking. But when my father finally spoke, they were words of assurance.
"Alright, Clay. Ask her if she can make dinner tomorrow at six. If you think this girl can be your mate, she's going to have a lot to learn. We might as well start introducing her to the idea of pack life."
I sat there stunned for a few moments, not sure what to say. I’d expected the challenge in getting my ring to accept Jade, but I hadn't for one second anticipated my parents to want anything to do with her. Their invitation was nothing short of a miracle, and the relief so intense I almost couldn’t breathe. All I could do was thank them and dismiss myself gratefully to process by myself.
The air was cold outside, and the sun did hardly anything to warm the late afternoon. I walked all the way to the edge of the neighborhood until I was well into the woods, then shifted into a warmer coat of fur. I followed the trail our pack had carved into the brush over the past few weeks, minding the view of the cameras perched in the trees. Down past the burnt tree trunk, across the brook, out into the clearing where the mustard plants and cheese weed vines covered a peaceful clearing. The ground was only visible in one modest patch where the earth had recently been upturned, large stones set in a circle over the fresh earth.
I sat beside the grave. This little garden was only for us living. The wildflower seeds we’d planted would eventually bloom, or the weeds would overtake them, or maybe a wildfire might drift close enough by and leave the entire meadow nothing but a wasteland of ashes. Dust to dust.
"You were right, brother," I murmured, feeling my breath hitch painfully. A soft breeze answered me, running through my fur. "Things are alright. Jade is alright. And... I wish you were here with the rest of us. We all miss you." I flattened my ears. "I'm sorry I wasn't there that night. I should have been."
I couldn’t bring myself to continue. I hadn’t even been back here since we placed the circle. The shame hung like a boulder in my chest as I sat beside the stones, trying to suppress the memories pestering me. My heart had broken to see him lying on the kitchen table, nothing but a shell of the packmate he’d been, and it broke again to be sitting beside his marker.
But I had come to him with good news. News good enough to get through the misery and the grief of all the rest of them. Even if it meant fighting harder than ever to keep what was mine.
dinner with wolves
Jade
My stomach was a tangle of knots as I stared at myself in the mirror. Ivy stood at the bathroom doorway, leaning against the frame with her arms crossed. She’d been hounding me with questions since I told her I was going to Clay’s house for dinner with his parents.
His parents.
"You sure this isn’t moving too fast?” she said. “Not that it’s... a bad thing. Though, I didn’t meet Nick’s parents until at least a month in. An official month.”
I ran my hands through my hair again, wondering if I should put it up or just leave it down. It shone soft and glossy but still looked disheveled. I decided to pin back the worst of my wayward locks and let the rest of it fall naturally down my shoulders.
"You and Nick are Christian teen idols, really,” I said. Ivy shifted her weight with a scowl, but didn’t say anything. “Clay’s family is complicated. They’re nice, but complicated. Also, it would be super dickish of me to reject them. Especially after his mom saw me naked.”
