A Tale of the Secret Saint Vol. 5, page 7
Our tour soon ended, and she asked the last knight we met to take care of Green and Blue. “These two will be staying with us as honorary knights for a few days. Please show them to a room.”
There was nothing in particular I needed to do that day, so I stuck to my sister the whole time. She was something of a busy bee, it seemed, and apparently an important one at that. Whenever she finished one task, another seemed to crop up for her. I could only help with half—or even half of half!—of her work, but she praised me happily anyway. And sticking with her all day also meant that I got to make friends with a lot of the knights in the stronghold.
At night we shared a bed. The two of us talked about how cute I used to be when I was little, how she looked after me, how we used to train together, how worried she was during my coming-of-age ceremony, and all kinds of stuff until I finally fell asleep.
The anxiety that had stirred in me ever since I saw Guy slowly faded as we talked, and I remembered that I was, indeed, none other than Fia Ruud. I had the memories of my past life now, as well as the saint powers that came with it, but they didn’t define me. What shaped me was the past fifteen years I’d lived as the girl named Fia Ruud.
I was the girl who longed to be a knight and trained since youth for that purpose.
I was the girl loved by her big sister, Oria.
Yes…my past experiences in this life made me who I was now. But if I was to continue living as Fia Ruud, I needed to confront the trauma of my past life.
I curled into a ball, hugging myself inside my blanket and steadying my breathing.
It’ll be fine. I’m safe now.
But would I be safe tomorrow? Would Oria be safe tomorrow?
No… I mustn’t run…
I hugged myself tighter and let my mind fall back to the last moments of my past life. The moment I did, my heart began to race a mile a minute and I started to sweat. My body, which had been so calm and cozily warm after talking to my sister, now trembled fearfully. An ill, creeping chill clung to my body as it grew harder to breathe.
I…I can’t do it.
My body vehemently resisted my attempt to recall the Demon Lord’s right-hand man. It was because of him that my past life’s final moments remained a mess in my mind. What parts I could remember appeared to me as though through a veil of dim fog. But even so…
I brought my hands up to my mouth and clenched my chattering teeth together. Out of fear, my body was resisting my attempts to delve into my memories. The past me would have given up here in favor of freeing my body from the strain. But now—no. I have to continue. I have to remember!—a strong will rose within me, born from the bits of courage I received from everyone I’d met since I first remembered my past life.
I want to protect those who are dear to me.
I want to live with those I love for the time to come.
As though that push was all they needed, my memories gradually came unbundled and shone clear. Slowly, I came to remember the details I hadn’t been able to recall when my memories first returned.
My mind went back to the moments before I encountered the Demon Lord’s right-hand man, when my past life’s three brothers and I were in the Demon Lord’s castle.
Ah… I remember…
Clear as day, I saw before me the moments we fought the Demon Lord, and then the moment the battle was done.
What were the Demon Lord’s final moments like? I can do this. I remember.
Were they collapsed on the ground, covered in their own blood? No. No, the Demon Lord was nowhere to be found.
But why? Why…?
My teeth began to chatter again. I couldn’t stop my body from trembling, no matter how hard I hugged myself. Through closed eyes, I saw clearly what I saw three hundred years ago. My brothers and me, covered in blood—and a box.
What’s in the box?
A simple question with a simple answer. It took no effort to recall at this point.
Ah, that’s right…
Three hundred years ago, I sealed away the Demon Lord.
I could see it now: a barren castle and an empty throne…my brothers celebrating…and in their hands, a box.
We sealed the Demon Lord away inside a box.
With the last bit of our strength, the last bit of our magic, we ran ourselves ragged to lock the Demon Lord away.
How could I forget?
We did not kill the Demon Lord all those years ago. We merely put a stop to him…
***
Now that I thought of it, the courage I mustered back when I first remembered my past was really something. I’d been killed by the Demon Lord’s right-hand man, and, having remembered it in this life, I decided to live a life on the down-low, keeping my powers a secret until I had allies strong enough to help me.
More specifically, I’d thought to myself: I’ll find three swordsmen who are at least as strong as my three brothers from my past life. Until I find them and team up with them, I won’t use my saint powers!
In hindsight, I had to wonder…why in the world did I set such an unrealistic goal? I’ve lost any contracts I had with spirits from my past life, so I only had a tenth of my former healing magic power available to me now. Even if I did find three swordsmen on par with my past life’s brothers, my lack of power would likely cause us to fall short in a battle against the Demon Lord’s right-hand man, and yet I had been so blindly courageous back then. I’d genuinely believed I stood a chance, despite how much I feared the right-hand man and my weakened powers.
I must’ve thought the right-hand man was far, far, weaker than the Demon Lord, perhaps because I couldn’t recall how strong demons actually were. Or maybe I just wanted to optimistically believe there was hope for me if I could somehow find three people as strong as my brothers in my past life. How else could I have set such a senseless goal? Now, though, I could no longer believe that’d be enough…
Wide awake, I slowly propped myself up off the bed. Oria slept comfortably beside me. Keeping my eyes on her, I rose from the bed and walked to the window, taking care to be silent. I looked outside and saw the moon shining on the dark night.
Even after three hundred years, the moonlight remains the same. Seeing the familiar, unchanging celestial body calmed my heart. In silence, I gazed at the radiant moon and continued where my thoughts had left off.
How could I have overlooked something so important? When my memories first returned, I did recall the fact the Demon Lord was sealed and not killed. But I didn’t stop to consider what that might have meant.
If all went well, the box the Demon Lord was sealed in should still be deep within the Cathedral, never to be unsealed…but no, I suspected that the Demon Lord’s right-hand man seized the box before my brothers could leave the castle. There was simply no way he’d be so careless as to let his lord be taken away. And if he had taken the box…then surely, he must have unsealed it sometime in the past three hundred years. The Demon Lord’s right-hand man was loyal to a fault and not the type to try and rule himself. He was the sort to find someone worth serving and do everything he could to place them on the throne. If we were to meet again, it would likely go down just as it had before: First I would fight the Demon Lord, defeat them with every last bit of strength I had, and then the Demon Lord’s right-hand man would appear again when I was weakened. The one who killed me those centuries ago…that’s the sort of person they were.
Without a doubt, that sly, cunning demon still existed somewhere in this world. Because…because why wouldn’t he?
I looked at my hands. They were beginning to tremble. I clenched them tight. A single question surfaced in my mind, and I had to fight to keep it around.
If…
If I were to remake a contract with a spirit and obtain the same saintly powers I had in my past life…
If I were to find three fighters of equal strength to my brothers…
Would I be able to defeat the Demon Lord and their right-hand man?
Too many unknowns. Too many what-ifs to know for sure. Still, my entire being immediately and vehemently shot down the idea. I could not imagine myself triumphing over the two, and not just because of the horrible end I’d met in my past life.
Before I realized it, my body was completely tense again. My heart was pounding faster than it ever had before, and my legs were trembling so hard it took effort to stand.
This fear…it’ll probably never fade as long as the Demon Lord’s right-hand man lives. And I see no world in which I can defeat him…
Somebody, anybody, please…
I’d thought that far when I suddenly felt my consciousness begin to fade. My field of vision began to constrict terribly fast, so I hurried over to the bed and collapsed atop the blanket.
This was probably some sort of defense mechanism. My body, in its hypertension, was forcing me to relax, to be lulled to sleep. Unable to resist, I let the bed take all my weight.
I felt my consciousness fall straight downward into darkness. My mind was drifting off to the land of dreams, but before it could depart completely, a name escaped my lips. “…rius.” I called his name as though calling for help, perhaps only because I was half-conscious now, moving between dream and reality. The name I whispered was that of a man no longer of this world, the captain of my Royal Guard and the strongest knight.
Chapter 35:
The Captain of the Royal Red Shield
(Three Hundred Years Ago)
SIRIUS, THE STAR that shines brightest in the night sky. All I needed to do was look up and I would see its overwhelming radiance there watching over me, wherever and whenever I was…
I, Serafina Náv, lived alone in a forest when I was young. There I remained until Sirius Ulysses, vice-commander of the Knight Brigade, came alone to take me out of the forest and return me to the Royal Capital. If anyone else had come, I probably wouldn’t have gone. The forest had everything I wanted, after all, and I didn’t yet know my role in the world.
Sirius swore to be my guardian and protect me from all things. He was the highest-ranking duke in the Kingdom and the son of the King’s late younger brother. What was more, he was the vice-commander of the Knight Brigade and would almost certainly rise to the rank of commander one day. Despite his lofty positions, he never once mocked my forest-dwelling self for knowing nothing of the world. He was a busy man with important work to do, but somehow, he always found a way to put me first.
Two years passed since I returned to the Royal Capital, around the time I turned eight. Sirius was twenty-one now and had just been offered the role of commander come next spring. It was an honored position. It was generally given to royalty or nobles with royal blood, so not a single noble objected when Sirius—the son of the King’s brother—was offered the position. No knight objected either, for Sirius was the strongest swordsman in the kingdom. Strength was a virtue to knights, so it was only fitting that the strongest knight stood at the top. The knights knew firsthand that nobody trained more than Sirius—another reason for his overwhelming support.
That same Sirius, with his gray hair and silver eyes—both rare for the Kingdom—held his face close to mine and snarled, “Serafina, why have you gotten hurt again?! Do you not remember what I’ve told you?!”
Even at my young age, I could tell he was more handsome than most. But his handsomeness only served to make him more intimidating when his expression twisted into such a displeased visage. I could only presume he had come running after hearing I’d been hurt in that morning’s monster extermination expedition. Of course, I had since healed the wound without leaving a scar behind—I’d even changed my clothes—but still he glared at my right shoulder and gritted his teeth. He had been briefed on the details of my injury, it seemed.
His fierce glare was chilling, but I knew he only ever got angry out of worry for me, so I smiled. “Sirius, I discovered a sure-fire way to win battles!”
“You…what?” The scowl on his shapely face deepened, as if my words were lost on him.
Normally, I would try to calm him down first when he was worried for me, but I was too excited at the moment. “Really, really! I’m used to protecting myself when I fight, so whenever I have a split-second decision to make, I unconsciously default to casting Protection Magic on myself instead of my knights! But that’s wrong! From now on, I’m not going to protect myself. I’ll leave that to the knights.”
His eyes went wide with disbelief. “Are you stupid? You’re a saint! You’re the most fragile thing on the battlefield! It’s a given that you should protect yourself first!”
I saw the logic in his words, but I had to disagree. “But think about it. If my knights and I are ever attacked together, prioritizing my protection might cause the knights fighting on the front line to get injured!”
“As is their duty!”
He raised his voice, but I didn’t flinch and just cocked my head at him. “Well, that’s what you think as a knight. But as a saint, I believe it’s my job to make sure not a single one of my knights dies. Besides, I’m not saying I’d be defenseless, just that I’d leave my protection to my knights.”
“Look, I’ll admit this idea of yours has some potential, but it’s not something for you to test out personally! There’s no guarantee your knights will be able to protect you in the first place! In fact, you actually got injured today, did you not?!”
“But Sirius, this method is really hard to pull off. How many saints do you know that are good enough to test this method other than me?”
He fixed a fierce glare in my direction. “It’s rude to ask questions you already know the answer to! Zero, of course! No saint stronger than you exists in this world.” He continued to glare for some time. Eventually, however, he seemed to understand I wasn’t changing my mind anytime soon. “Fine. I understand you have your pride as a saint and want to protect your knights,” he relented. “However. As someone who leads knights, I also have my knightly pride. In exchange for allowing your behavior, you must allow me to assign you the most suitable knight possible to protect you. Understood?”
“Sirius!” Overjoyed, I ran up to him and hugged his stomach. Squeezing my arms around him tightly, I said, “Thank you! I just knew you’d understand!”
Sirius was the best! My brothers would have laughed and called my idea childish, but Sirius always made sure to at least hear me out. I looked at him, beaming, clueless as to what was coming…
The following afternoon, I was about to go out on a monster extermination expedition to test out the new strategy I had discussed…and was stunned to see Sirius waiting for me.
“Wh-wh-wha…S-Sirius?” There was much I wanted to say, but I could barely manage anything through my fluster. My mouth opened and closed like a beached fish.
Despite definitely knowing full well why I was so aghast, he asked, “Is something the matter?”
“I-Is something the—yes! Obviously yes! What in the world are you wearing?” I looked him up and down, blinking wildly. There was only one earnest thought parading through my mind: Please, pleaaase let this be a joke! To my horror, no matter how many times I blinked, his knight uniform stayed red.
No waaaaay! I screamed internally.
The Náv Kingdom’s knight uniforms were supposed to be blue and white. Sirius was a vice-commander, a high-ranking position, so his uniform was a deeper blue and had some decorations to signify his rank—but it should still be blue and white. So why was his knight uniform red?
He’s not supposed to be wearing that. The red knight uniform belongs to the… My face tensed as I looked at Sirius in disbelief.
He opened his handsome lips and said the very words I didn’t want to hear. “As astute as you are, I’m sure you’ve figured it out already. Starting today, I will serve as captain of the Royal Red Shield, entrusted with the duty of protecting Your Highness Second Princess Serafina Náv.”
“Wh-what are you talking about?! You’re the vice-commander, aren’t you?!” I knew I didn’t mishear him, and I knew he wasn’t the type to joke around, but I just couldn’t believe it.
With an impassive look, he said something that made all else seem trivial in comparison. “I have resigned from the post of vice-commander as of yesterday. The Kingdom has already given its approval.”
“What?! Why?! You were going to become commander in the spring! There’s nobody who cares for our knights like you…nobody with your kind of talent! Do you understand how big of a deal it is for you to lead the Brigades?! Why would you throw that all away?!”
Sirius was a busy man, but he still found time to be by my side. Because we spent so much time together, I knew well what he desired and strove for. I knew better than anyone that he loved the Knight Brigades above all else!
Despite all that, he met my eyes and shook his head. “You misunderstand. I didn’t throw away the position of vice-commander. I rose to the position of captain of the Royal Red Shield. Our current commander will serve well for some time further. He’s still only in his forties, after all.”
The current commander had served well for quite some time, so I understood there was no issue with him remaining in the position—but that wasn’t what I was taking issue with at all!
“Didn’t you want to be commander, Sirius? Weren’t all your years of effort for that singular purpose?!” I raised my voice, practically shouting.
Completely calm, he replied, “It was. However, I want to protect you. If you’re going to put yourself in harm’s way, it is my duty to stand at your side and keep you safe. I said it, didn’t I? ‘You must allow me to assign you the most suitable knight possible to protect you.’ Can you name a knight more suitable than me?” As though getting his revenge in, he repeated what I’d said yesterday in the exact same tone. “Personally, I know none better with a sword, or anyone more willing to throw away everything to protect you. Or do you disagree?” He looked at me, patiently waiting for a response.
I fixed a fierce glare on him, looking like a mirror image of Sirius himself just the day before. “It’s rude to ask questions you already know the answer to! Of course there’s no knight more suitable than you! There’s nobody but you who’s so strong yet so stupid that he’d throw everything away for my sake!”
