Searching for Risk, page 17
No.
Fuck.
He couldn’t let his mind wander. He had to focus. Had to breathe. One mistake could cost him his life and the lives of Sasha, Bella, and Spirit. It could damage the high school he graduated from and possibly hurt teachers and students inside.
He could not let that happen. He reached in with his free hand to support his wrist and kept working.
Finally, the last wire fell away, and the detonator stopped flashing just as the first wail of a police siren tore through the air.
Donovan let out a deep sigh of relief, checked to make sure there were no other triggers he may have missed, and then pulled himself out from under the dashboard. He turned to Sasha, who was still sitting rigidly in her seat, weeping in silent, shuddering gasps.
He reached out and took her hand in his. “It’s over, angel. You’re safe now.” He helped her from the seat and caught her when her legs gave out.
Sasha leaned into him and wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his chest. He felt each tremble that jolted through her and each frantic beat of her heart. He ran a hand down her spine. “Shh. You’re okay.”
“You saved me.” Her eyes lifted to his, full of equal parts terror and wonder. “I-I can’t believe that just happened. Why would someone want to kill me?”
Donovan’s jaw clenched as anger sparked hot inside him. “To hurt me.”
Over her head, he watched as Ash’s Tahoe slammed to a halt, blocking all other cars from entering the parking lot. More deputy vehicles filed in behind the sheriff, clogging the street and setting up barricades around the school.
It was going to be absolute chaos soon, with parents showing up, demanding to see their kids. Not that Donovan could blame them. If he had kids, he would chew through the police barricades and tear down walls with his bare hands if he thought they were trapped and in danger.
Jesus. First, this fucker attacked a dog rescue, and now he put a bomb near innocent kids.
Whoever did this was going to pay.
Ash ran over to them, and he looked even more frazzled than he had during the interrogation days before. He had a coffee stain on his button-up shirt, his hair and beard were both a wild mess, and his eyes were crazed with fear. “Bella?” he demanded.
Donovan lifted his chin toward his Jeep. “Spirit’s with her.”
Ash started in that direction but stopped short. “The device?”
“Disarmed.”
Ash raced toward his niece, cursing in a creative string that Donovan would’ve found hilarious if his own fear hadn’t suddenly beat out the adrenaline and overwhelmed him. He tightened his grip around Sasha and pressed his face into her hair, blinking hard to keep back the tears burning in his eyes.
“It’s okay,” he repeated over and over, as much to assure himself as her.
He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see Ash and Bella. The sheriff held his niece tucked securely under one arm and held his free hand out for a handshake. His expression was a mixture of gratitude, terror, and rage. “Thank you, Van.”
Donovan nodded, not trusting himself to speak, and accepted the handshake.
“It’s not safe to stay here,” Ash said and hugged Bella to his side. “Can you follow me down to the station and give a statement?”
Again, he could only nod. He’d go anywhere if it meant getting Sasha as far away from the bomb as possible. He returned his attention to her and rubbed soothing circles on her back. “Hey, angel. Did you hear Ash? We need to get out of here,” he said gently. “Can you walk?”
Sasha nodded, still holding onto him tightly. He helped her to her feet and led her over to his Jeep. Spirit was still sitting in the back and licked Sasha’s cheek as she settled into the passenger seat.
Donovan climbed behind the wheel and waited for Ash to bundle Bella into his vehicle before pulling out of the parking lot. As they drove away, the chaos of the scene faded into the background, and Donovan focused on Sasha. He reached over and took her hand, lacing their fingers together. She was still trembling, and her eyes were wide and unseeing. He knew the fear and adrenaline would linger long after the danger was over.
“It’s okay,” he said softly. “You’re safe now. We’re going to the station, and you can give your statement. Then, I’ll take you home. You can take a hot shower, crawl into bed, and rest. I’ll stay with you all night.”
“Thank you,” she whispered, her voice hoarse from crying. “If you and Spirit weren’t there...”
He didn’t even want to consider that. “I’ll always be there for you, angel. Always.”
They drove the rest of the way in silence, Sasha’s hand gripping his tightly. They arrived at the station, and he escorted her inside and stayed close as she recounted the events to a deputy in one of the interrogation rooms.
When it was over, Ash met them in the front lobby. It was a well-lit area with blown-up photos of local scenery on the walls and a large wooden desk at the center. The department’s receptionist was busily typing on her computer, not paying them any attention except to offer a distracted smile as the sheriff walked by. Ash had changed his shirt into a wrinkled gray button-up and finger-combed his hair and beard, but he still looked exhausted.
“How’s Bella?” Sasha asked.
“Shaken, but Zak and Anna are with her in my office now. They’re shaken, too. And pissed. So am I.” His fists curled at his sides. “This is the second attack on my family in less than a month.”
“Do you have any leads?”
Ash nodded and looked at Donovan. “It’s Tiago. You were right. I tried to track him down, but he never reported to the fireline like he was supposed to. I did talk to his captain, and Redwood Coast Rescue isn’t the first time he conveniently arrived on the scene of a fire before everyone else.”
“So he’s a classic firebug, setting fires to be a hero.” Donovan thought back to the figure standing in the flames. “Except RWCR broke that pattern. He didn’t save anyone there. He just watched it burn.”
Ash pressed his lips together in a grim line. “Seems like his only goal now is destruction. He’s gone AWOL, and he took a shit-ton of explosive material with him when he left.”
“That explains the sophistication of the set-up in Sasha’s car. There were all kinds of fail-safes in place. He didn’t have time to activate them all, but as a firefighter, he’d have the expertise to create something like that.”
“We don’t yet have any definitive proof he planted the bomb,” Ash said. “But the bomb squad has taken it into evidence, and the explosives in it are a match to some that he took. We’re dusting it for fingerprints.”
“But…” Sasha shook her head. “Why would he plant it in my car? I barely know him. Only met him that one time.”
Ash didn’t answer and simply stared at Donovan, passing him the conversational ball.
Yeah, okay, that was fair. This was his mess, after all.
He turned her toward him and rubbed his hands up and down her arms. “It’s because of me, angel. To hurt me. For some reason, I think Tiago blames me for his sister’s death, and this is him getting revenge.”
“You were the last person to see her alive,” Ash said. “It’s an easy conclusion to jump to from the outside.”
Sasha broke out of his arms and paced a few steps down toward the front door, then swung back. “This is all… too much. I-I really need to go home and sleep.”
“Okay, I’ll take you.”
She held up her hands and backed up a step, widening the distance between them. “No. Please. I need—to not be near you right now. Ash, would you mind driving me?”
“No, of course not. Let me grab my keys.” He walked toward the hall to the left of the lobby and disappeared through the door at the end marked with his name.
Donovan waited until they were alone again before he spoke. “I didn’t hurt Chrissy.”
Sasha closed her eyes. One of the deputies had brought her a fleece blanket during questioning, and she now hugged it tighter around her. “You say that a lot. You didn’t hurt Darcy. You didn’t hurt Chrissy…”
“Because I didn’t.”
She opened her eyes and met his gaze for an instant before focusing on the floor between them. “I… want to believe you.”
“But?” he prompted because he heard the unspoken one at the end of her sentence.
“I’ve been listening to the podcast.”
Fuck. He should’ve known curiosity would get the better of her. “It doesn’t paint a flattering picture of me. Or, for that matter, of Darcy.”
“I know.”
“It’s twisting the truth for ratings.”
“Probably. But…” She released her breath in a sigh that moved her shoulders. “I don’t know how I feel about it, Donovan.”
His heart cracked right down the middle. He clutched his chest, wondering for an instant if he was going to keel over right there in the lobby. “You don’t believe me anymore.”
“It’s not that. It’s…” She waved a hand around them, encompassing the lobby, the hall of offices to the left of them, and the dispatch center to the right. “All of this. Even if you are innocent, I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t know if I can live with this constant shadow of suspicion and threat of danger. Are we going to end up in one of these interrogation rooms every few days for the rest of our lives? Are they going to pull you in for questioning every time a girl goes missing or a body turns up?”
He dropped his arms helplessly to his side. “We could leave. We don’t have to stay here.”
“But this is my home. All of my friends are here. My patients. My life.” She stopped pacing and met his gaze. “I’m not walking away from this relationship for good, okay? I just… this is a lot. I need a second to breathe and—”
“What, make a plan?” His laugh was bitter. “You can’t plan love or life. A checklist isn’t going to keep you from getting hurt or experiencing grief again. A list won’t bring your dad back, Sasha.”
She flinched. “That was low.”
He knew it. And he didn’t care because he was in pain, bleeding out from the deep cuts each of her truthful words had inflicted.
But he also knew he couldn’t let her go. Not yet. Not without a fight. “I’m sorry,” he said, taking a step closer to her. “I didn’t mean that. I’m scared. Scared of losing you. Scared of losing everything.”
“Me, too,” she whispered but still backed toward the door. “But I think... for now, we need some time apart.”
His heart sank. Time apart? Was this the beginning of the end? “How much time?”
“I don’t know yet.”
Donovan watched her push through the door and disappear into the haze of smoke outside. His heart was like a lead weight in his chest, crushing his stomach into knots and weighing down his lungs so he couldn’t draw a full breath. He wanted to run after her and take back everything he’d said in the last five minutes, to hold her close and beg for her forgiveness, but he knew that wouldn’t change anything.
He’d defused the bomb, but the damage had already been done.
He sagged against the wall and closed his eyes, forcing himself to take a deep breath before he passed out from oxygen deprivation. He needed to find a way to clear his name and prove to Sasha that he was innocent. He couldn’t blame her for her doubt or for wanting distance after today, but he couldn’t lose her— not when she was the best thing he’d ever had in his life.
Footsteps approached from the direction of Ash’s office, and he opened his eyes to find not only Ash but also Zak standing there. He could still see the boys in the two men—the brothers he’d once loved like family. He missed them.
Zak’s expression was full of sympathy. “I’m sorry, man. That was rough.”
Donovan rubbed a hand over his face, pushing away the tears he refused to cry. “Seeing that doubt in her eyes was like a knife slicing me open.”
Zak nodded. “I get it. Anna looked at me like that once, and it felt like a death blow. I didn’t think we’d recover from it, but we did. And so will you and Sasha.”
“Not unless I can clear my name.”
They both looked at Ash.
He held up his hands in protest but then dropped them back to his sides—almost like the move had been an involuntary reaction. He gave a long-suffering sigh. “Yeah, I’ll help you clear your name, and I know exactly where to start. I have to take Sasha home, and you should take your dog home,” he said to Donovan. “But then how about a ride-along?”
Zak grinned. “Will I get to kick some ass with my shiny leg?”
“No,” Ash said and turned away. “You both will be there as witnesses only.”
“You could deputize us—”
“Fuck, no,” Ash said with feeling.
part three
extinguish
Nirvana means to extinguish the burning fires of the Three Poisons: greed, anger, and ignorance.
Shinjo Ito
episode 7: questioning the investigation
Hey there, Truth Seekers! Welcome back to Cold Truth. In our last episode, we read an excerpt from Darcy’s diary, which shed some light on her state of mind leading up to her disappearance. Today, we’ll be discussing the investigation and some of the criticisms that have been raised about it.
Now, right from the beginning, Sheriff Jerry was pretty focused on Donovan Scott as a suspect, and some critics argue that he didn’t explore other leads enough.
What other leads, you ask? Well, there were reports of a suspicious-looking vehicle in the area around the time of Darcy’s disappearance. The make and model of the car were never identified, and it’s unclear whether it was ever even investigated. Why didn’t Sheriff Jerry follow up on that? Could this have been the vehicle used to transport Darcy’s body or possibly even used by the abductor to take her? We may never know.
The anonymous phone call that police received, claiming to have information about Darcy’s whereabouts, is another lead that was not taken seriously. What information did the caller have, and why did they choose to remain anonymous? Why didn’t they ever try to call back? Was this call made by the perpetrator, or was it a genuine attempt to help with the investigation?
There were also reports of a man with a red beard seen in the area around the time of Darcy’s disappearance. This man has never been identified, and it’s unknown whether he was ever questioned. Could he have been involved, or was he simply a witness? Either way, it seemed like someone should’ve spoken to him, but for some reason, Sheriff Jerry dismissed this possible suspect early on and instead focused entirely on Donovan.
And what about the crime scene? Critics have pointed out that investigators called off the search of the surrounding woods too soon, and other areas where Darcy could have potentially gone were never searched at all. Instead, all of their efforts focused on the area where her shoe and blood were found.
Now, remember: this case is still open, and it’s possible that other leads are being pursued that haven’t been made public. When asked about the case, the current sheriff, Ashley Rawlings, was hesitant to comment and only said it was an ongoing investigation that he and his deputies are taking very seriously. He also said that he hasn’t ruled out any suspects but that they aren’t currently investigating Donovan Scott.
Does the new sheriff believe that the investigation was too narrowly focused on Donovan and that other leads were not pursued as aggressively as they could have been? Sure seems that way.
Donovan did go on to join the Marines and served as an explosive ordnance disposal tech for thirteen years until he was medically retired in 2021 following a traumatic brain injury. His military record was spotless, but unfortunately, he picked up his old troublemaking ways as soon as he returned home. In 2022, he was charged with assault for attacking a man at a bar in Steam Valley. He was court-ordered to attend therapy for anger management, PTSD, and substance abuse. However, it’s important to note that erratic behavior isn’t uncommon with TBIs and does not necessarily reflect on who he was as a teenager. It is possible that Donovan was wrongly accused, and if that’s the case, I can’t imagine what this all has been like for him.
He declined to be interviewed for this podcast.
So, what do you think? Do you believe Donovan is guilty, or do you think the investigation was too narrow in its focus? Who else could be a potential suspect? There are still many unanswered questions surrounding the disappearance of Darcy Cantrell, and while we may never know exactly what happened to her that night, we can honor her memory by making sure she’s not just a forgotten cold case. Darcy doesn’t have any family left. Her father died of cancer in 2011, never knowing what happened to her. So it’s up to us as truth seekers to continue the search and, hopefully, find justice for her.
And with that, we come to the end of Cold Truth’s investigation into the disappearance of Darcy Megan Cantrell, but please remember that there are countless other cases like Darcy’s, where victims have been left without justice, and families left without closure. It’s important to continue to raise awareness and advocate for those who can no longer speak for themselves.
Thank you for listening to Cold Truth. I’m Alexis Summers reminding you to stay curious, stay safe, and keep seeking the truth.
chapter twenty-four
“Can I just say I strongly advise against this,” Cal Holden said from the backseat of Ash’s Tahoe.
“Noted,” Ash, Donovan, and Zak all said at the same time.
“And ignored,” Zak added cheerfully.
Cal raised his eyes to the ceiling as if asking a higher power for patience. “Then why am I even here?”
“Because I hired you to cover my ass,” Donovan said. “So, cover it.”
Cal winced. “You know I’m not that kind of guy, right? No offense. I like you, and you’re okay looking and all for a dude, but I’m all about the ladies.”
