Joseph and His Brothers, page 124
things may have proceeded, and whether it has now gone so far that they have already enjoyed each other's flesh and blood, so that it would be too late for any preventative measures and only revenge remains—that I cannot say with complete and absolute certainty. But what I can swear—at my own peril before every god and before you, my humiliated master—to be certain truth, because I heard it with my own ears at the flap in the curtain, is that in their cooings they have agreed to beat you about the head with sticks until you are dead, and once they have dispatched you, intend to pursue their lust as master and mistress upon a garlanded bed here in this house."
At these words, Petepre pulled the sheet completely over his head, so that nothing more of him was visible. He remained like that for some time, until the pause began to seem overlong to Dudu, though he had been happy to observe how at first his master had lain there like an amorphous mass, covered in his own shame and vanishing beneath it. Suddenly, however, Petepre threw the sheet back as far as his hips, sat up halfway and, propping his little head in a little hand, turned to the dwarf.
"I must offer you my earnest thanks," he said, "guardian of my chests, for your revealments"—"revealment" was a borrowed Babylonian word—"in the cause of saving my honor, or even for the determination that it is already lost and that I have only my naked life left to save, which I must strive to save not for its own sake, but for the revenge that my life must serve in terrible devotion from this moment forward. Caught up in thoughts of punishment I run the danger of neglecting the equally important thanks and reward that I owe you for your discoveries. The horror and rage they cause me is equal to my amazement at your own feats of love and loyalty. Indeed, I admit to you my surprise—which I should moderate, I know; for how often is not some humble person—to whom one has not exactly shown the respect and trust he deserves—a source of finest things. All the same, I cannot refrain from a cenain incredulous amazement. You are a deformed mooncalf, a queer dwarfish buffoon, to whom, far more out of amusement than in earnest, I assigned duties in my chamber—a half-ridiculous, half-disgusting sort of fellow, both halves heightened all the more by your pomposity. Under such circumstances does it not border on the incredible, or perhaps even cross that line, that you should have succeeded in penetrating the secret life of persons who, apart from me, stand highest
in this house and, for example, in reading billets-doux that, according to your charge, have found their way between the young steward and the mistress? Must I or should I not doubt the very existence of these papers, as long as it seems inconceivable to me that you could ever have managed to read them? For that, my dear man, you would have had to worm your way into the trust of the confidential person commissioned to carry such letters, and how can that seem even somewhat probable given the undeniable nastiness of your person?"
"Fear of having to believe your own shame and lamentable abasement," Dudu replied, "allows you, poor master, to look for other reasons to mistrust me. You are content with very flimsy reasons—so great is your quaking fear of the truth, though, granted, the mockingly wretched face it presents you makes your quaking understandable. Hear, then, how feeble your doubts are! I did not have to steal my way into the trust of the confidential person chosen to carry those lush letters, for I myself was the person chosen."
"Stupendous!" Petepre exclaimed. "You, a little and funny man like you, carried the letters ? My respect for you has begun to grow swiftly in simple response to your statement; but it still must grow a good deal more before I also actually believe what you say. So you are so intimate with the mistress, are on such friendly footing with her that she would deliver herself, her happiness and her guilt, into your hands?"
"Most definitely!" Dudu riposted, boldly shifting his weight to his other leg and his other hand to his hip. "And it is not just that she gave me these letters to carry, but I also dictated what her reed should write. For she knew nothing of billets-doux and first had to be instructed in that tender art by me, a man of the world."
"Who would have thought it!" the chamberlain marveled. "I realize more and more how greatly I have underestimated you, and my respect has begun its swift, unstoppable ascent. You did that, I assume, in order to push matters to the brink and to see how far the mistress would be willing to go in this offense."
"But of course," Dudu confirmed. "I acted out of love and loyalty to you, my humbled master. Would I be standing here otherwise, pricking you to take your revenge?"
"But how," Potiphar wanted to know, "being the scurrilous and odious fellow you at first appear to be, did you gain the intimate friendship of the mistress and make yourself master of her secret?"
"They occurred at the same time," the dwarf replied, "both at once. For as any good person would be, I was grieved and angered for Amun's sake by this foreigner's cunning ascendancy in the house, and I nursed a mistrust of both him and the deceit in his heart—not unjustly, as you will now admit, since he has miserably cheated you and violated your bed of honor, so that, after having received kindness upon kindness from you, he makes you the laughingstock of the capital and soon, most probably, of the Two Lands. In my grief and suspicion, then, I complained before Mut, your wife, about this offense and injustice and pointed out this wretched person to her, calling her attention to him. For at first she claimed not to know which servant I meant. But then she entertained my bitter complaints in a strikingly tangled fashion, babbled on in curiously slippery words, which, under a pretext of concern, became ever more wanton, so that I realized her loins merely lusted after the slave, that she was as infatuated with him as any kitchen maid—that is what, by his guilty presence, he brought this proud woman to. And if a man such as I had not taken on the matter, cleverly associating myself with it, so that I might burst the scheme wide open at the right moment, your honor would have been undone. That is why, once I spied your wife's thoughts slinking off down dark paths, I slunk right behind them as one would slink behind a thief in the night in hope of nabbing him in the act, instructed her in billets-doux—both to tempt her and to see how far gone she already was and to learn what she was capable of—and found my every expectation and worry exceeded; for with the help of the blind trust she placed in me because she believed that I, as a resourceful man of the world, was ready to serve her in her lust, I realized to my horror that this wicked, incendiary young steward had made this noble lady capable of truly anything and that not only your dignity, but your life as well are in imminent danger."
"I see, I see," Petepre said, "you called her attention to him and prompted her—I understand. So much, then, for the mistress. But I simply cannot as yet accept, absolutely cannot believe that a man with your imperfections could have also won the trust of the steward."
"Your incredulity, my stricken master," Dudu rejoined, "must capitulate before the facts. I attribute it to your fear of the truth, and also to your sacred, special condition, to which one must ascribe, as
I'm sure you'll admit, this entire misfortune, for it makes you incapable of appreciating and understanding other people—how very much their opinion of a fellow man, their fondness for him, be he of short or moderate stature, is conditioned by his wilHngness to satisfy their desires and lusts. I needed only to give myself the air of such willingness and in my best polished fashion offer him my services, as a worldly, discreet go-between for his lust and that of our lady—and with that the ninny fell into my trap and I stood on such tender footing with him that he no longer concealed anything from me; and from then on I could not only observe and follow every detail of the game this traitorous pair was playing, but could also promote and abet it with my seeming patronage, so that I might observe how far they would go and to what point of culpability they might be willing to advance, in order that I might nab them at the very brink. That is the method of the guardians of established order, among whom I am a model. For by patiently slinking after them I also succeeded in exposing a conviction they both share, a most remarkable aspect that forms the basis of their game: that whoever lies with the mistress is the master. That, you should know, my poor master, is their lewd, murderous hypothesis, which they discuss daily and from which, as I have heard from their own lips, they derive the right and higher legitimacy to fell you with a stick and rid the house of you, so that, its slain master dispatched, they may celebrate their feast of roses together—as mistress and master of love. But when as her confidant I had brought them to this brink, had heard their lips admit it, the boil seemed ripe for lancing, and I came to you, my disgraced master, to whom I am faithful in your misery, that I may prick you and we can nab them."
"Let us do so," Petepre said. "Let us come down upon them in terror—you, dear dwarf, and I, and their crime shall catch up with them. What do you think we should do with them, what punishments seem to you painful and awful enough for us to inflict upon them?"
"I am of a gentle mind," Dudu replied, "at least in regard to our Mut, the beautiful sinner, for her lonely bed excuses much, and although her lapse has left you in a bad way, it would not—just between us—be seemly for you to raise a great cry. And as I said: if the mistress becomes infatuated with a slave, one should look to the slave, for by his mere presence he is to blame for this misfortune and
should suffer for it. But I am also of a gentle mind on his behalf and do not even demand he be bound and left to the crocodiles, as he deserves on the basis of both his fortune and misfortune. For Dudu is not inclined to revenge, but rather to security measures to douse the enkindling flames, and the man should be bound merely so that the razor can do its work, thereby eliminating the danger at its root and putting an end to the possibility of his ever being with Mut-em-enet or of his beautiful form having any meaning in the woman's eyes. And if he is properly bound beforehand, I myself am prepared to perform the pacifying deed."
"I find it worthy of you," Petepre said, "that you offer yourself for this task as well, after all you have done for me. Do you not think, my little fellow, that the act would reestablish justice in the world, insofar as this precaution would, you see, give you an advantage over the docked young man, precedence that would offer you, who are so oddly built, redress for his fair form?"
"There is something to that," Dudu responded. "I would not deny that it is worth mention in passing." And with that he crossed his short arms, thrust one shoulder forward, began letting the leg he had boldly set before him wave in the air, and rocked his head to and fro amid jaunty glances and ever increasing merriment.
"And where does that lead, do you think?" Petepre continued. "One really cannot leave the man at the head of the household, can one—not after you have made him pay in full by performing such a procedure?"
"Most definitely not!" Dudu laughed, still carrying on as before. "The head of a household in command of all its servants should not be a pacified culprit, but a competent man with all his capacities intact, who can represent his master in every business dealing and in every situation with which he cannot or does not wish to concern himself."
"So then I also know," the captain added, "the promotion with which to reward you, my stalwart fellow, in gratitude for your loyal service as a spy and for having pricked me in order to save me from ignominy and death."
"I would hope so!" Dudu cried, his arrogance now veering out of control. "I would certainly hope that you know where Dudu belongs, and have a clear sense of gratitude and rightful succession. For it is not too much to say that I am protecting you from ignominy
and death, and our beautiful sinner as well. But she ought to know that I pleaded her case with you on account of her lonely bed and that I have granted her life, so that she has breath only by virtue of my favor and grace. For if I so choose and she responds to me with ingratitude, I can, just as I please and at any time, trumpet her crime throughout city and realm, so that you would be compelled to strangle her after all and turn her fine body to ashes, or at least, with nose and ears docked, send her back to her family. So let her be prudent, the poor murderous flirt, and turn her gemstone eyes from a pleasant but now meaningless form to Dudu, ingenious comforter, master of his mistress, doughty little steward of the house."
As he spoke Dudu cast still jauntier sidelong glances into nowhere, gyrated his shoulders and groin, pranced on his little feet, and behaved very much like a courting cock in a tree, blind and deaf in its frenzy, completely absorbed in its own allurements. But the same thing happened to him as happens to the cock when the hunter leaps up to grab him. For suddenly Petepre, his master, was out from under the sheet and on his feet in a single bound, quite naked, a tower of flesh with a little head—and with the second bound reached the chair where his things lay, and was now swinging his cudgel of office. We have seen this handsome piece, this emblem of command or one like it, in his hand before: a cylindrical, gilded leather staff wreathed in golden leaves and ending in a pine cone, a symbol of power—and probably a fetish and cult object for women as well. Suddenly the master was swinging it, flailing Dudu's shoulders and back with it, thrashing away at him until the dwarf was soon deaf and blind, but for other reasons than before, and was squeahng like a pig.
"Ow, ow!" he cried, buckling at the hip. "Oh that hurts! The pain, I'm dying, I'm bleeding, my little bones are broken, have mercy on your faithful servant!" But there was no mercy, for Petepre drove him from corner to corner of the bedchamber with relentless blows and cries of "There, there! That's for you, you buffoon and shameful runt, you arrant knave, who has confessed to me all his treachery!" Until the loyal dwarf found the door and, bending beneath his bruises, took to his heels.
The Threat
Our story reports that Potiphar's wife addressed such "words" to Joseph day after day, begging him to He by her or be with her. Does that mean he gave her opportunity to do so? That even after that day of the painful tongue he did not avoid her company, but continued to join her at various places and various times of day? He did. Surely he had to, for she was his mistress, his female master, and could summon him and command he appear whenever she liked. Besides which, he had promised her that he would not forsake her in her distraction, but comfort her with words as best he could, because he owed her that much. He realized that. He was bound to her by an awareness of his own guilt, and in his heart he admitted that he had foolishly stood by as things came to this pass and that his healing regimen had been culpable balderdash, the consequences of which he must now bear and ameliorate if possible, however dangerous and difficult, if not indeed pointless, that task may have become. Should one also praise him for not withdrawing from the sight of the afflicted woman, but exposing himself "daily"—or let us say, almost daily—to the breath of the fiery bull, daring over and over to confront one of the strongest temptations that has ever laid siege to a lad in the history of the world? Perhaps, in a certain sense and in some part. Among his motives some were praiseworthy, one can credit him for that. The feelings of guilt and obUgation that motivated him deserved praise; as did the courage that allowed him in his plight to trust in his God and his own seven reasons; also, if you like, even the defiance that had begun to determine his conduct and demand of him that he match the woman's madness with the power of his reason—for she had threatened him and pledged herself to ripping from his brow the wreath that he wore for the sake of his God and to crown him with her own instead. He found that shameless, and it should be noted here and now that there were several other things about it all that made him feel this was a matter between his God and the gods of Egypt—^just as over time Amun had become a motive behind her desires, or had been turned into one by others; and so one can understand, indeed condone him for regarding backing off as impermissible and for considering it necessary to see the matter through and let it redound to God's honor in the end.
The Pit <)jj
Good enough. But not quite unalloyed good, for there was another reason why he obeyed her, met with her, visited her, but one that, as he himself well knew, was not laudable. One may call it curiosity and frivolity, call it an aversion to finally giving up the possible choice of evil, the wish to keep the choice between good and evil still open, though with no intention whatever of siding with evil. . . . Did he, despite the seriousness and danger of his situation, also take pleasure in dealing with his mistress tete-a-tete and calHng her "my child," in which he felt fully justified by her passion and forlorn-ness? A banal conjecture, but one that is certainly warranted alongside other more pious, more profoundly dreamy explanations of his behavior—which is to say, the far too playful but profoundly exciting idea of his having died and become the god Usarsiph and of the sacred state of readiness that this impHed, but over which, to be sure, there also hovered the curse of the adulterous ass.
But enough—he met with his mistress. He stuck with her. He survived her constant barrage of such "words," her entreaties that he lie with her, saying "Sleep with me!" He survived it, we say—for it was no joke, no bagatelle to persevere in the presence of this woman of dreadful desires, to offer kind advice and, for his part, always to keep those seven opposing reasons in mind at their full intensity as a defense against her demands, which, after all, corresponded so nicely with certain feelings arising from his own dead and deified state. Indeed, one is inclined to overlook the less laudable motives behind the conduct of Jacob's son when one considers the trouble the unhappy woman caused him with her daily importuning, until he had moments when he understood why in his rage and distress, Gil-gamesh had finally ripped off the bull's penis and cast it in Ishtar's face.
