Luke waited by the door, her coat in hand. He usually did the chivalrous thing and helped her into her coat. This time he just handed it to her without saying a word to her.

  She gave him a peculiar look, but then she realized his focus was over her head.

  "Thanks, Callie," he muttered.

  The nurse practitioner tilted her head in acknowledgment of Luke's gratitude.

  "You're welcome, Luke. And, Merry Christmas."

  "Come by No Limits after you close up here. The party will be great, and Shiloh would love to see you."

  Was Luke flirting with another woman in front of her? Xenobia glanced between the two; sure more was being communicated than what she heard. Okay then, what was her part in this silent movie?

  She grabbed Luke's hand, giving his knuckles a pat. "Yeah, Callie. You should come." Awkward, she thought.

  The ride back to the cabin was unusually silent. Xenobia had asked Luke more than once if something was wrong. And she wasn't done.

  "Tell me what's going on in that head of yours." Something was very wrong at a time when she felt like everything could be right between.

  He kept his eyes on the road. "You basically told Callie I'm a nuisance."

  "I said no such thing," she insisted.

  "Not once did you tell her you are my girlfriend," he snapped. "That you're into me."

  "Luke," she said reaching for his hand.

  "Don't Luke, me! I'm not toying with you, and I for damn sure am not about to let you string me and Shiloh along."

  "You have to know I wouldn't do that."

  "Why not tell her the truth, huh?" She didn't have an answer. "Leaving yourself a way out when the tree comes down and the magic is gone." He made a Jazz hands gesture, something Shiloh had taught them.

  "That's not fair."

  "All's fair in war?" She noticed he’d left out the word love.

  No sooner than they'd entered the cabin, Luke said. "Look, I need to head out sooner than planned."

  "But, it's Christmas Eve," she insisted. Why was he being so ornery? She thought they'd gotten past this phase.

  "Yeah, well life doesn't stop for Christmas. Some of us don't get to have a happy holiday."

  "What’s that supposed to mean?"

  “Look, I don't want to argue with you. I'll take Shiloh with me. You can do whatever it is you want."

  "If you have to go to work on something, I'll take her to the Christmas party at No Limits. You can meet us there."

  "Yeah Daddy I want to stay with Miss Xenobia."

  Finally, his daughter had gotten Xenobia's name correct and it was over between them.

  "Grab your Kindle™, Pumpkin. You're coming with me."

  Shiloh started to cry. Xenobia scooped up the little girl she thought of as her own, into her arms, and cradle her head. "Shh, stop crying."

  "Give her to me," Luke said, holding out his arms.

  "No," Xenobia said putting her foot down, "she's staying with me and we’re going to the party to have a good time. All three of us."

  "You sure I'm not bossing you around, making you do things you don't want to do?"

  Xenobia's eyes widened. "You were eavesdropping."

  "It's Endurance. Of course I was."

  "Luke," she protested. “I just...” What could she say?

  She trusted him, but she wanted to guard her heart. She felt more for him than the man she’d vowed to love forever, and that scared her.

  "If you can’t see that I want you here, that Shiloh loves you. I feel sorry for the both of us. We could be a family, have more children.”

  Xenobia’s eyes widened, she couldn’t hide her shock. “You want to have babies with me?”

  Luke blew out a harsh breath, obviously frustrated. “I want everything with you.”

  When he moved to turn away, she grabbed his hand. Strong hands that had held her so gently, that possibly loved her. “Do you love me, Luke?”

  The muscles in his face tightening and he went ridge as stone. He looked down at their interlocking fingers. “I need to clear my head."

  "You do that,” she said releasing him, “and then we need to communicate."

  "I'm done talking. I told you straight up what I want. You are not the only one who's been mowed down by love. When you're ready to admit we are your home, then we talk."

  Ugh, Luke Cole. He hadn’t said he loved her. They both had been betrayed by the ones who had sworn to love them forever. Xenobia was ready to unburden her life, excise Rook's lies and the pain they caused, from her future. But Luke didn't look ready to hear any of that.

  He kissed Shiloh on the head. "See you at the party, Pumpkin."

  And then he disappeared into his bedroom, Meow trotting after him. Even the cat was upset with her.

  CHAPTER NINE

  The moment Xenobia walked into No Limits something felt awry. Lights, wreaths, garland, lights hung on every visible surface. The main dining room was packed, as was the bar. The music was amplified; “Rocking Around the Christmas Tree”© with a steel drumbeat vibrated the walls. And the children, they seemed to have multiplied. The tables and been lined up end-to-end for additional space and there were Dutch ovens, slow cookers, and platters overflowing with meat, veggies, cakes, cookies, and pies.

  Ivy approached, her custom-made tie-dye shirt jingling with sewn-n red bells. It was hideous, that it was cute.

  "Xenobia, where's Luke?

  "He's on his way. Why?" Yep, she was that chick wanting to know what every woman needed with her man.

  "Girl, some guy showed up about five minutes ago looking for you."

  "Who is he?"

  Ivy fanned her face. "He is fine and gorgeous. Says his name was Ramsey."

  Oh, dear baby in a manger, not now. While Ivy faked a swoon, Xenobia's brain sprang into action.

  "Does Luke know about Mr. Prime Ripped?" Ivy covered her eyes. "I mean seriously, I can't unsee that body," she exclaimed.

  "He's not a guy," Xenobia rolled her eyes. "He's a brother-in-law." Ramsey was a romance book hero incarnate. Not too tall or short, a touch of gray at the temples, and a whole lot of muscle to hold onto.

  "So why show up now?"

  "There you are," Ramsey shouted. "Everybody this is the woman I've been looking. My sister-in-law's favorite little sister."

  Xenobia took one look at his holiday attire, and nearly fell and bumped her head again.

  Ramsey Tadeo wore his leather vest, no shirt, and painted on jeans. His signature cowboy hat had been replaced with a fuzzy red Santa's cap. The complete holiday Playboy™ ensemble.

  And as the famous bunny said, that's all folks.

  To say the man had a beautiful body was an understatement. His muscles had individual modeling contracts.

  "Ramsey, what are you doing here? I told you not to come."

  He pinched her cheeks. "I thought that was code language. You know, a cry for help," he said, tossing a few pretzels in his mouth. "Who wants to be alone at Christmas?"

  Thanks to Luke and Shiloh, she hadn't felt that sense of being alone within the crowd at all. "Keep your voice down."

  "We're in a bar," he pointed out as if she was daft.

  "I know that. Do you want everybody to hear us?" She needed to get him out of here. The last thing she wanted was for Luke to arrive and see a half-dressed cowboy hanging on to her.

  "Let's get out here. We can catch up over a couple of beers."

  "No. No. No."

  "Why not? I plan on being in town for a few days. Did you know this town doesn't have a hotel or a bed and breakfast? Zilch. I Yelped™ it. Guess I'll have to crash at your place."

  "Ramsey, you cannot crash at my place. I have a boyfriend."

  "I have earplugs. Where's your Christmas spirit?"

  "In short supply," she said gesturing to the door.

  "You would not throw family out on the street on Christmas Eve."

  That got everybody's attention. A few onlookers shook their heads. Xenobia smiled and said, "Mind your business," while leading Ramsey toward the door.

  "Okay," she hissed, looking back over her shoulder, "you can stay."

  "Great."

  She tugged on his arm. "Let's go, now." She insisted, trying to speed him along.

  "Naw, I'd rather get to know the good folks of Endurance. Maybe, I'll like it here and hang around awhile."

  "Nope," she said immediately, "that's a terrible idea."

  "I don't think so, Xenobia. You look great, little sister. The move out west was a good one for you."

  "Thanks, Ramsey," she said, sincerity flavoring her words.

  All of a sudden, she was up off her feet. What was it with men picking her up? He spun her around.

  "I'm so proud of you. Pulling your shit together, moving on after losing Rook. He was my kid brother. I know he made a lot of mistakes. He wasn't perfect, but I miss him."

  "I know you do," Xenobia said giving his shoulder a squeeze. "Put me down," she said through clenched teeth. "People are watching."

  "Maybe some of your happiness will rub off on me," he continued, ignoring her request and placing a kiss on her cheek.

  "Okay, okay," she said patting his chest. "Down now."

  Before he could, Ramsey stumbled forward, then bellowed as if wounded.

  "Bad Santa," an angry Shiloh Cole said, her hands on her red denim-covered hips. "Miss Xenobia belongs to me and my daddy. She's our girlfriend. My daddy is the only boy who gets to kiss us."

  On all that is holy. "Shiloh, wait a minute," Xenobia said cautiously. Just then the bell above the door jingled and Luke walked in. Beard trimmed, hair still damp, Xenobia temporarily lost the ability to speak. He truly did take her breath away. In that moment, she knew. Xenobia loved Luke.

  "No, I saw Santa Claus kissing you and I'm going to tell my daddy."

  And then she took off running in the opposite direction disappearing in the crowd.

  "So, you really do have a boyfriend?"

  "Yes, Ramsey. That's what I've been trying to tell you." A very grumpy, already grinch boyfriend, who would hit the roof when his daughter told him about “ the bad Santa”. Xenobia kept an eye on Shiloh, watching until the little pumpkin reached her father. She'd explain to Luke who Ramsey was as soon as she could explain her feelings to Ramsey.

  "Sorry," he said, studying her. "You're serious about this guy? I mean, are you really moving on?"

  His expression shifted from jovial to contemplative.

  "Let's not talk about this here, Ramsey."

  "The anniversary of my little brother's death, your husband, is tomorrow. If I can't talk about it with you," his voice dropped, "then who?"

  Xenobia released a breath. She took one look in the direction Luke had been. He was gone. And so was the Christmas fantasy she'd created with him and Shiloh. Ramsey was right. They were all that remained of Rook's life. Rook's memory was hers to bear, just like his hidden sins.

  Ramsey had been good to her after Rook's funeral. The husband, who'd never truly belonged to her, had taken the best part of himself to the grave, leaving her to maintain the illusion that he was a happily married man, and her the grieving widow. For Ramsey, the memories dated back to Rook's childhood, their juvenile antics, their coming of age challenges, and into adulthood, and his brother's marriage to her. At the very least, she could let him share his grief.

  "Come on. We can talk at my place."

  "Let me pay my tab. I had a couple of beers before you arrived."

  "I'll take care of it. Let's get out of here and," she took one look at the muscles flexing across her chest, "you need a shirt." And, she wanted Luke.

  LUKE needed to find Xenobia. Perhaps he’d over-reacted to her conversation with Callie. After a marriage with the wrong woman, he knew his future happiness lay with Xenobia. As much as he wanted her to never leave his home, she needed to choose him. Luke realized he couldn’t push her into loving him. No Limit’s parking lot was filled with pickups and SUVs, so he was not surprised to arrive at the celebration and find the party in full swing. What did surprise him was the stomp of little feet and his daughter's face, red with anger stating that she didn't like Santa Claus anymore. He wondered who had donned the costume this year, and how bad were they at playing the part.

  "Pumpkin, you can't be mad with Santa Claus." Xenobia was nowhere in sight and he wondered had she witnessed the run-in. Where could she be?

  "Yes, I can."

  "You can't receive all he has to offer, presents and good cheer, if you don't like the messenger, Pumpkin."

  "I saw Santa Claus kissing Miss Xenobia and I don't like him anymore. I don't want his stupid presents."

  Wait. What?

  "Who kissed Xenobia?"

  "Bad Santa, Daddy."

  Luke called to Owen who was behind the bar refilling pitchers with red and green beer. "Owen, who's playing Santa this year?"

  "Couldn't get a volunteer this year, but I did see some half-naked biker type with a Santa hat talking with Xenobia. I think they know each other."

  Luke scooped up his daughter. Someone had been naughty and when he found the unknown man, he wouldn't play nice. Problem being, Xenobia was nowhere in sight.

  Shiloh started to cry. "Daddy, are you going to get Miss Xenobia back? She's what I want for Christmas."

  It was getting late and he didn't want Shiloh to witness any dust-ups with Xenobia or Bad Santa.

  "Me too, Pumpkin. I'm going to ask Mrs. Ivy if you can stay with Cai and Baby Grace."

  "But, Daddy-,"

  "Shh, it's Christmas in the morning. When you wake up, me, you and Miss Xenobia will have our Christmas cake for breakfast."

  "You promise, daddy?"

  He rubbed her curls with his hand. "I promise."

  CHAPTER TEN

  Xenobia never realized how bleak her home was until she compared it to this last week with Luke and Shiloh.

  Ramsey took a cursory look around the place. " So, you just moving in?"

  Xenobia sighed. "Nope, I've been here over a year." Yet the place looked pretty sad. A couch no pillows, a coffee table no magazines, a wooden floor, no rugs. The place was sparse just like her life had been before Luke and a beautiful little girl who had trouble pronouncing her name.

  "Wow," he chuckled. "This place is pretty sad. And that's saying something for a man who lives out of a duffel bag."

  Xenobia jabbed a finger in his chest. "Remember you're a guest."

  Ramsey rubbed the spot. "Okay. Okay. It's safe to assume you spend most of your time at your boyfriend's house? How long you been with this guy?"

  "We've only been dating for three days."

  Ramsey gave a soft laugh. "Tell me you're joking?"

  Xenobia laughed too. "I know," she threw up her hands. "It sounds crazy, but he's the one."

  Ramsey took a seat on the couch. "Seems a little sudden. You never even hinted at wanting a man in your life."

  "I know, but Luke has this easy way about him. When I'm with him, it's like we're best friends. Like your favorite sweatshirt."

  Ramsey still hadn't produced a shirt to cover all those muscles. "So, your new boyfriend is well-worn, possibly ripped in a few places, faded and stained."

  "Yeah," she laughed, walking into the kitchen. "Can I offer you coffee, tea, a bathrobe?"

  He gestured to his bare chest, "does this bother you?"

  She waved him off. "Me, of course not. I'm immune, but bare chest doesn't exactly say Christmas as much as baby oil, and maybe a private dancer."

  He let out a belly laugh. "Rook always loved your sense of humor."

  That was the first time in while Xenobia remembered the laughter they had shared. The usual pain didn't come when she thought about Rook. "Yeah, he did."

  "So, this guy."

  "Luke. His name is Luke Cole."

  Ramsey rubbed at his shin. "And the little soccer enthusiast back at the bar?"

  "His five-year-old daughter, Shiloh. And sorry, she usually a happy kid."

  "She seems pretty protective of you."

  Shiloh's physical outburst had surprised Xenobia. It was rare indeed for anyone to come to her defense. But her fierce little warrior had claimed her outright.

  "Well, she is her father's daughter." She had no doubt that Luke would always be in her corner. It was one of the reasons why she wanted to have this talk with Ramsey. For her to truly build a solid foundation with Luke, the nature of her relationship with Ramsey, her memories with the hurt and anger of everything that Rook had done had to change.

  "So, you love him? Like you loved my brother?"

  Xenobia thought about the two men she'd loved. One she trusted with her heart even without the vows. She'd sworn to love and care for Rook, but he had betrayed the sanctity of their commitment to cherish one another. She was no longer an idealistic bride believing a white dress and ring on her finger meant happily ever after.

  "It's different with Luke. There's no pretense or wondering what he's thinking," she left off the 'or doing' part. "He's an open book. A gentle giant of a man who wants me bruised and battered."

  "You really are ready for this aren't you?"

  She nodded her head. "Yeah, one day I'd love for you two to meet."

  A single knock rang out on her front door before it swung open. A freezing gust of wind swept inside bringing with it a blinding cloud of snow flurries. When the dust settled, Luke, big and menacing stood in the open doorway, his features a stone mask.

  "Luke," Xenobia said. "We were just talking about you."

  The mask cracked; raw pain mixed with anger took its place.

  "Told you I was done talking." He looked at Ramsey, his eyes narrowed on her brother-in-law's bare chest. "Let me show you what it means when I say you're mine." Zenobia pulsed jumped. She wasn't about to endure another devastating Christmas because of another name with the last name Tadeo man.

 

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