Just One Kiss, page 4
She stood there for several minutes, searching for a clue to her unexpected attraction to this total stranger, and came up blank. In comparison, Sean came out the winner in every department. Well, every department except one.
Her cheeks warmed as desire-filled eyes flashed before hers and unleashed a fresh coil of heat in her belly. She clamped her hands over her stomach and quickly looked around, hoping no one else could sense her crazy reaction to the guy. She’d never felt a fraction of the desire for Sean that she’d just felt for Nick.
She pursed her lips as she realized she’d never felt that kind of burn for anyone.
She walked in a daze back to Jamie’s table to find her gawking. Ignoring the look she linked arms with her. “Ready?”
“What was that about?” Jamie demanded as they walked out of the building and across the parking lot to Jamie’s tiny car. “You and that guy almost made love without even touching.” She fanned herself with her free hand. “Girl, that was so hot, people around me were swooning.” She gave a dramatic sigh, then giggled when Tamara shoved her.
Tamara opened her mouth to deny it, but the lie wouldn’t come. “You felt the heat all the way over there, huh?” She couldn’t stop the grin that curved her lips.
They got in the car and Jamie spun to face her. “So? Spill. He is so not your usual type.”
“I know, right?” Tamara was thankful for the validation of her own thoughts. She wasn’t trying to be shallow, but wasn’t everyone attracted to certain things in another person?
“Not my type at all, but umm, he did something that made my insides go all melty. Jamie,” she looked at her friend with worried eyes, “I’ve never felt anything like that before. And for just a second he looked ... different.” Tamara thought about the way his eyes had flared to life with that intense green color.
“Melty?” Jamie caught on the word and let out a tiny moan and an exaggerated full-body shiver. “I like ‘melty.' Like when it feels so good it almost hurts. You must have felt something similar before. Maybe not ‘melty’ but ‘gooey’ at least.” She studied Tamara. “What about Sean? He’s all kinds of sexy.” She waggled her eyebrows. “He must have melted you a little bit.”
Tamara was glad Jamie didn’t wait for a reply to that comment, because she didn’t have one. Jamie started the car to take them home while she strapped on her seatbelt. She’d never felt much of anything physical for Sean.
Sure, kissing him was pleasant. More importantly, they were compatible, and he fit in her box labeled “Perfect Man”, so she’d hung on to him. She didn’t even know anything was lacking between them because she’d never experienced that red-hot desire herself. Sure, she’d seen heat between others, but she really thought people were just way overreacting.
Apparently not.
“Nick suggested we get our affairs in order in case we’re picked.” Tamara tried to move the conversation away from her strange reaction to the guy. She needed some time to sort out her feelings on her own. “Did you hear him say the selected candidates leave tomorrow? Isn’t that really sudden?”
“Mm hmm.” Jamie waited for a break in traffic then turned down a side street towards Tamara’s apartment. “Pretty exciting, though. I hope they pick both of us,” she bubbled.
Tamara watched the familiar buildings of downtown pass by. The post office. City Hall. Would she miss any of this if she left? Was there anything keeping her here?
Nope! Was the immediate answer, but then she felt guilty. She would miss her parents—but not enough to make her consider giving up a position with this company.
She felt completely clearheaded and yet so relaxed and at ease. Shouldn’t she be a little panicked about a possible life-changing decision like this?
“Does it worry you at all to think about just up and leaving everything we’ve known all our lives for something completely unknown?” she asked Jamie as she realized Nick hadn’t directly answered her questions about where they would be going.
“Not at all,” Jamie said. “Getting the job right now would be an answer to prayer. When do we ever have opportunities like this come along? I’ll tell you,” she reached down and turned up the volume when her favorite song came on, “never!”
Tamara nodded in agreement, and she and Jamie both started singing along with the radio as the song got to the chorus, “Doesn’t matter where I am. Just matters who I’ll be. And if I play it right, this time I’m gonna be me.”
It was fitting, Tamara thought as they belted out the words. She wanted to be ‘her.' Sometimes she wasn’t exactly sure who that was. The girl who wore hand-me-downs? The valedictorian at Peace?
Jamie tapped on the steering wheel and moved her head, snaking her shoulders in a “driver’s dance” as she sang. Tamara smiled at her then looked back out the window as her smile slipped.
What did she want out of life? Was her perfect plan really that perfect? She wanted a job that paid well and challenged her, of course, world travel, a full-sized bathroom, a little cushion in the bank. Wasn’t there more to life than that, though?
Although she rarely admitted it, even to herself, she longed for adventure and the kind of love found on the pages of a sweet romance. But she didn’t expect it. Real life wasn’t filled with sexy heroes and dangerous villains. It wasn’t one thrilling adventure after another. Real life was what you made of it. She nodded to herself. She intended to make hers safe and secure, and if it was a little boring, well, whose wasn’t?
She walked into her apartment alone since Jamie wanted to start packing “just in case.” Flipping on the lights, she felt her stomach drop. She stood in the doorway and let herself really see the room. Definitely boring. This wasn’t a home. No pictures hung on the walls. No knickknacks and “stuff” set on shelves to make it hers.
Had she ever been happy here, or was she just going through the motions of life until she could move on to the next phase?
The contentment from earlier crumbled at the edges like a sheet of paper slowly being consumed by fire. It didn’t desert her completely, she was still excited about this possible new job, but it lifted enough to let her feel the emptiness of her life up until this moment. She’d always been so busy striving to get to the next stage in her careful plan she hadn’t focused on enjoying where she was.
Well, it was time to change that. She closed and locked the door behind her and headed straight for her closet to pull out the only suitcase she owned. Maybe she could add a little adventure to her safe and secure—and quite boring—life. She took a deep breath. She would be optimistic and move forward as if the position was hers. The worst that could happen was that she would have to unpack in the morning if she wasn’t offered the job, right?
After she packed, she would pay her parents a quick visit. She slowly folded a shirt she pulled off a hanger then carefully placed it in the suitcase. She was long overdue for a visit, but she wasn’t looking forward to going.
With a new job on the horizon, she could sneak her mom a bit of her savings for groceries. Her dad would flat out refuse the money, no matter how bad they needed it. He said it was a parent’s responsibility to provide for his child, not the other way around.
She both loved and hated that about him.
Chapter 4
“Oh, Tami! What a surprise!” Susan Worth had been an attractive woman, but a hard life took care of that real quick. She wore a torn t-shirt over baggy sweatpants that might have once been blue but were now a mottled grey. With her hair caught up in giant rollers, she looked like she was probably on her way to bed, but she pushed the screen door open wide in welcome. “Come in. I wish I’d known you were coming. I would have cleaned up.”
Tamara forced a smile and nodded while ignoring the lie. Her mom and this house pretty much looked the same day in and day out. She leaned in to kiss her mom’s weathered cheek, unconsciously holding her breath against the familiar stench of stale smoke. It took real effort to force her feet over the threshold into the trailer house where she’d spent her youth.
Yellowed wallpaper dotted with faded flowers covered the walls. Ancient knickknacks graced unpainted shelves and hadn’t been rearranged since the last time she’d visited, maybe two years before.
They probably hadn’t even been dusted in that time, but she reminded herself she wasn’t here to judge. She made a point of taking her parents out to dinner on a regular basis—at least once every couple of months—just so she didn’t have to face this place and the painful memories it held.
She walked over to her framed senior picture hanging prominently above the couch, stumbling as the toe of her shoe caught on the cracked linoleum.
“Oh, watch yourself there!” Susan hurried over and steadied her by the arm. “I’ve been meaning to fix that. I’ll have to get your dad to put some electrical tape over it in the meantime so no one gets hurt.”
Susan grabbed a stack of newspapers from the couch and dropped them on the floor. “Now you just sit down and let me look at you.”
Tamara gingerly sat on the edge of the dirty cushion. I love my parents. I love my parents. She knew life had been hard for them. One bad break after another her dad claimed. It wasn’t that she didn’t believe him—she’d grown up seeing the bad breaks: the company that went under two weeks after dad gave up a steady job to work for them. The shady contractor that owed him a month’s salary and just disappeared without paying. She didn’t blame her parents; she just wanted more. She wanted them to want more.
“So what brings you here?” Susan settled into the faded, floral-covered rocking chair and beamed at her.
“Is Dad home?”
“No, he picked up a second job working at the old gas station around the corner two nights a week.” She checked the white plastic watch strapped to her wrist. It wasn’t quite ten. “He won’t be home until just after midnight. He’ll be real sorry he missed you.”
Tamara gave her a genuine smile. “I’m sorry to miss him, too. I’ll stop by the station and tell him ‘hey’ after I leave here. I wouldn’t have just dropped by so late, but Jamie talked me into applying for this job with her. If we’re selected, we leave tomorrow for a week of paid training. I didn’t want to risk not being able to tell you goodbye.”
“A new job?” Susan frowned and a double set of Vs lined her forehead. “I thought that boyfriend of yours had a nice job all lined up for you.”
Tamara had been hoping her mom had forgotten about that. “Yeah, the job didn’t really work out. Neither did the boyfriend,” she added.
“Oh, honey. I’m sorry.” Susan leaned over and patted her knee. “Want to talk about it?”
Tamara considered that for a full second before realizing she couldn’t care less about the boyfriend part and only slightly more about the job. For some strange reason she was really excited about this Aerth company. “No, I’m okay.”
She opened her purse and pulled out her last two hundred dollars. “If all goes well, I’ll be on my way to earning a good salary in no time.” She had no idea what the salary actually was, but it would be more than she was making now. “I want you to use this for groceries, okay?” She tried to hand her mom the money, but she wouldn’t take it.
“You’re a good girl. You know that? Taking care of us whenever you’re able. Now that your dad has this part-time job, we’re getting on our feet. Oh!” Her face brightened, and she jumped up and scurried out of the room. “You’ll never believe what I’m doing,” her muffled voice came from the direction of her bedroom.
She came back carrying a doll with a plastic head and a crocheted body. She held it out to Tamara.
“It’s like the one you made me for Christmas that year.” Tamara took the doll but tears welled in her eyes, blurring her vision, as she remembered how much she’d hated that doll. She’d wanted a store-bought doll like all her friends had, and instead her mom had made a doll for her.
After being teased one too many times about it, she’d stuffed the poor thing under her bed and refused to play with it. Her mom had done her best, and she’d been a brat and hurt her feelings. A tear splashed on her hand before she discreetly wiped her eyes.
“It’s beautiful, Mama.” And it was. The head was store bought, with a smiling, painted face and deep brown hair, but the crochet work that made up the body and dress was the part that made it exceptional. It was lovely.
“Oh,” Susan batted away the complement, “I don’t know about that, but I’ve sold quite a few at the flea market. I have another dozen on order. It’s giving us a little pocket money.”
Tamara reached over and wrapped her mom in a full hug. “That’s great. I’m really proud of you.”
Susan returned her hug then pulled away and turned the conversation back to Tamara. “So tell me more about this job.”
“I don’t really know much about it.” Tamara settled back on the couch and ran her finger over the spot beside her that had been worn smooth over the years. “Their logo has a spaceship type thing on it, so they might work with a company like NASA, or maybe one of those private companies that offers rides into space.”
Creases spread at the corners of Susan’s eyes and around her lips. “I know you’re a lot smarter about the world than I’ll ever be, but isn’t it strange to not know what kind of job you’re applying for?”
Tamara considered that. She wouldn’t deny it was strange, but for some reason she really wanted it. “They might not even call me back,” she said with a lightness she didn’t feel. She realized she would be crushed if she didn’t hear back from them. “If they do, I’ll get more details.”
“Okay.” Susan let it go and beamed at her. “I’m so proud of you. A college graduate, out making your way in the world. And look at you,” she waved a hand, “dressed all cute and stylish.”
This was one of her least favorite outfits because she’d found it at a garage sale for a dollar. She had trouble appreciating anything that wasn’t ‘store bought.' And that was a flaw, she realized. The price attached to something wasn’t what gave it value. Like Jamie said, this suit really did look good on her even, if it wasn’t expensive.
She leaned towards her mom and cupped her hand by her mouth to fake whisper, “Guess how much it cost.”
“I don’t know.” Susan shook her head. “A hundred?”
“How about one?” Tamara giggled and held up a single finger. “I found it at a garage sale for a buck then had it dry cleaned for another four. I guess I picked up some of your thrifty ways.”
Susan gave her a sad smile. “I hope this job of yours is the answer to prayer. Your dad and I always wanted to give you the world.” She lifted her shoulder in a tiny shrug. “It was just never ours to give.”
“Are we really doing this?” Tamara hefted her rolling suitcase up onto the sidewalk with a clatter and fell in line beside Jamie. She’d been thrilled when she got the call back at the crack of dawn. Now that she was here, she couldn’t stop second guessing herself.
She dropped the suitcase handle so she could use her hands to talk. “I mean,” she swished a hand through the air to include the surprisingly long line that trailed beside the company’s bus, “there must be fifty,” she did a quick guesstimate, “people here. What are the odds we’ll be offered the position?”
“Who cares?” Jamie bounced on the balls of her feet and shimmered with excitement. She slung her hair over her shoulder. “Paid training is almost the same as a free vacation,” she reminded Tamara. “We are so lucky!” she drawled, and the girl in front of her turned back with a smile.
“You got that right,” the girl said then stuck out her hand. “Alexis Price.” Tamara and Jamie introduced themselves before she continued. “I’ve been searching for a job for like two months now. Which I know doesn’t sound like that long.” She held up a hand to cut off any protests. “But there is NOTHING out there. Believe me, I’ve applied for any and everything.”
“I pretty much have, too,” Tamara agreed.
“You saw how many people were there yesterday,” Jamie said, “and I heard they had another meeting the day before.” She included Tamara and Alexis in her radiant smile. “Out of hundreds of people they picked us! None of us has a job right now, so what’s to lose?”
“This was a Godsend,” Alexis agreed. She high-fived Jamie then turned to talk to the girl in front of her.
Tamara pushed her hair off her face and watched Alexis laughing with a girl with curly red hair. What was there to lose? Free room and board for a full week and hopefully some training that would make them more marketable elsewhere if this didn’t work out.
And a chance to get far away from her humiliation. She’d told absolutely everyone that the other job was in the bag. Thanks a lot, Sean. She clenched her fists. She still couldn’t believe he wouldn’t even talk to her now. She’d tried calling him when she got home from her parents’ the night before, but he wouldn’t answer. What a jerk.
Determined not to dwell on the loser she’d been ready to tie her life to, she turned her thoughts to Jamie. “How were your parents when you told them about this training program?”
“Mom was all about the money. How much would I make? What were the benefits? You know her.” Jamie shook her head with a smile, and Tamara laughed.
Jamie’s mom was a no-nonsense kind of woman.
“My dad cried.” Jamie shrugged and tucked her hands in her front pockets. She looked like she might be fighting tears herself. She recovered quickly and linked her arm through Tamara’s. “They were happy tears, though. He said he knew there was something better in store for me than the restaurant, and that this must be it.”
A tickle of unease broke through Tamara’s unnaturally mellow mood. Was this “something better?” She searched her memories, trying to figure out what this perfect job even was and came up blank. “They never did say what position or positions they’re filling. What do you think they’re hiring for?”
