The Blending 07 - Deceptions, page 10
“Unfortunately that’s more than possible,” Kail allowed with an inner groan, his rising eagerness for something new beginning to fade. “If they do want us as servants, I’m going to insist on being taken back to the work area. Breaking my back to repair the destruction my own people caused is acceptable. Picking up after Astindans with too much gold isn’t.”
“I feel the same way, of course, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to insist on being taken back,” Ren fretted, disturbance in the glance he sent to Kail. “If I’m offered an actual bed to sleep in and the chance to look about the city during my free time … I’m a creature of cities, Kail, and I really do miss having one to wander about in.”
Kail nodded without speaking, more than aware of how much Ren had suffered despite his bantering about how good for his physical well-being the work had been. Renton Frosh was a man of emotions rather than of cities. He had always seemed to need serenity and happiness and outright enjoyment around him, even if he had rarely felt or shown those emotions himself. It could well have something to do with Ren’s Spirit magic, and the hatred and misery of the workers must have been a constant nightmare for him.
“We all do what we have to in order to survive, Ren,” Kail said after a moment, sending his friend a true smile. “We’ll both do what we have to, but let’s not rush into anything. Demanding to be taken back—or asking to stay—can be done after we find out the actual reason we’ve been brought here.”
“Yes, jumping to conclusions is an exercise I tried to avoid even when all others were beyond me,” Ren said with a small laugh. “Thank you for being a true friend, Kail.”
Kail shook his head with a dismissive gesture, but Ren continued to look much more at ease. He’d apparently been worried about Kail’s opinion of him and about what he meant to do, but now knew he had nothing to worry about. They would remain friends no matter what point the future brought them to.
But the future took its time appearing. The wagons continued along the street at the slower pace, nearly half an hour disappearing before they turned into the drive of a building that seemed to be their destination. The building was a large and gloomy construction of stone, a perfect match to the humorlessness of the Astindans. Both wagons pulled up near the wide and heavy wooden doors of the structure, and the Astindans who had ridden with the wagon drivers jumped down and came around to the back of the wagons.
“Follow me, please,” the Astindan who opened the tailgate of Kail’s wagon said, his manner still as unexcited as ever.
Kail joined everyone else in climbing out of the wagon, and then followed along with the groups from both wagons into the large building. Most of the people they passed only glanced at them, as though two wagonloads of strangers arriving was an everyday occurrence. But that was so only until they reached the building.
Inside there was a wide entrance area, and half a dozen more Astindans looked around at their appearance. These others seemed to be waiting for them, and they approached the doubled group in a small group of their own.
“You’ve been brought here today for a specific reason,” one of the half dozen greeters said, stepping out from the others and looking around as he spoke. “We’ve been told that you people have shown concern and a cooperative attitude right from the beginning, so we’ve decided to offer you the chance first. Those of you who can contribute something to our society will, after a time of trial, be given the opportunity to become full citizens of Astinda. If any of you feel that accepting our offer isn’t something you can, in all good conscience, do, just let us know and you’ll be returned where you came from. Take a moment to think about the matter.”
Ren looked as shocked as Kail felt, and a glance around showed Kail that he and his friend weren’t the only ones who had been taken by surprise. They weren’t just being offered productive jobs, they were being given the chance to become a true part of this new land. Kail found it impossible to picture his former peers ever doing the same, which suggested rather strongly that these people were definitely better human beings. These Astindans were willing to pay an honest price for whatever skilled help they might need …
“All right, you’ve all had a moment to consider your decision,” the same man said after a brief time. “Is there anyone here who would prefer to be taken back to the work area?”
Kail fully expected there to be no answer to that question, and was surprised a second time when two men, standing together, raised their hands.
“It’s rather painful to admit, but neither my friend nor I can accept your offer,” one of the two said with a sigh. “We may not have done what we should have with our Gandistran citizenship, but that doesn’t change the fact that we’re Gandistrans. We hope that someday, after all the hurts have had a chance to heal a bit, we’ll be permitted to return to our home. That’s the place we hope to make amends.”
After listening to what the man had to say, three others in the group also raised their arms slowly. Kail could now understand their reasoning, but the five were all older men who had spent most of their lives being Gandistrans. Kail’s life in Gan Garee had been mostly composed of misery, and if he never saw the place again it would not upset him in the least.
“I find myself surprised as well as impressed with your honesty,” the spokesman for the Astindans said with raised brows. “We thank you for that honesty, and will do what we may to see that you never regret it. You’ll be fed and allowed to rest before you’re returned to the work area.”
The five men nodded, and when a female Astindan stepped forward and gestured to them, they followed her toward the left side of the building. They seemed to be heading toward one of the doors there, but before they reached it the spokesman reclaimed the attention of those who were left.
“You’ll be separated into six different groups, and then taken to be interviewed,” the man said, looking around again. “If at any time you change your mind about wanting to be one of us, just speak to your guide and you’ll be allowed to join the people who are being seen to elsewhere. This is an opportunity, not a requirement, and none of you will be forced to comply.”
The Astindan glanced around one last time to see if anyone had already changed his or her mind, and when no hands were raised he got on with separating the groups. Kail managed to stay with Ren, and they exchanged a glance before following their new guide. They still had no real idea of what lay before them, but Kail hoped with all his being that he’d be able to find something to offer in return for his rescue …
Eight
Rion rode along in his place in the column, faintly amused and not quite certain why he felt that way. The enlarged group’s progress had been slower than what he and his Blendingmates had been used to, but the Gracelians weren’t up to moving quickly and without effort. They were also unconsciously reluctant to find and face the enemy, so the going had become even slower.
The amusement Rion felt seemed to stem from the circumstance of their presence among these strangers. The trip had begun with the various Gracelian leaders quietly vying for the position of overall leadership. Playing their political games seemed to be an ingrained part of their whole existence, even during a time when game playing was entirely inappropriate. And they’d also been very firm on the point that the visiting Blending from Gandistra was only there to help if it became absolutely necessary.
Jovvi and Vallant had conferred, and then they’d told the rest of them—and the members of the link groups—that their role had become one of hanging back. If the Gracelians were that determined to fend for themselves, the only thing to be done was to let them try. This was the fourth day of the attempt, and the Gracelians hadn’t even put out advance scouts. It ought to be amusing when they ran into the first of the trouble without the least prior warning …
“Good morning, Rion,” a voice came, and he turned his head to see Tamrissa moving up to a place beside him. “Nice day, isn’t it?”
“It certainly is,” Rion agreed in a matching tone of unconcern, his glance going to their surroundings. They rode along a wide, beautifully paved road, with fields and woods appearing in turn to either side. There were also occasional farms to do no more than dent the monotony, since breaking monotony isn’t an easy thing to accomplish.
“I’ve been asked to pass on the word that we’ll be seeing action of some sort soon,” Tamrissa continued in a much softer voice, her expression a match in blandness. “Our advance probings have shown some sort of group not far ahead of us, and they seem to be hiding to either side of the road. Also, our most solitary host seems to have let his brooding egg him into showing how much he thinks of us. All indications are that that Tal fool will attack us when the column stops for lunch.”
All indications, Rion thought wryly. That has to mean Naran’s ability is coming into play, but we don’t mention Naran and her abilities aloud. Not in front of the Gracelians, and certainly not in front of me …
“Tamrissa, I need to ask you something,” Rion said after nodding at what he’d been told. “You, as a woman, may well understand a certain happening, whereas our brothers are unable to explain the matter to me because of their own lack of understanding. You see—”
“You approached Naran in an attempt to heal the rift between you, and she refused to listen,” Tamrissa interrupted to sum up in admirably few words. “Is that what you wanted to ask about?”
“Yes, that’s the matter exactly,” Rion admitted with raised brows. “I wasn’t aware that you were present at the time.”
“That’s because I wasn’t,” Tamrissa answered with an annoyingly bright smile. “Naran told Jovvi and me about it afterward. You spoke to Naran yesterday afternoon, and she told us about it last night. You must have the world’s worst way of expressing things.”
“How kind of you to say so,” Rion responded stiffly, finding his own amusement disappearing as Tamrissa’s grew. “And do let me apologize for intruding with a question you obviously find so unimportant—”
“Oh, Rion, please stop being so stuffy and formal,” Tamrissa interrupted again, this time with a sigh. “That’s one of the things you did wrong with Naran, and I’ll be glad to explain the matter if you’re willing to listen.”
Rion opened his mouth to insist that he wasn’t being stuffy in the least, then swallowed the words instead of speaking them. He did need Tamrissa’s help, and driving her off wasn’t the way to get it.
“Allow me to apologize a bit more sincerely this time,” Rion said instead, chagrin coloring the words with actual sincerity. “I’d truly like to know what I—‘did wrong’ with Naran.”
“Actually, it was a combination of things rather than just one,” Tamrissa said, faint annoyance and a small frown apparently aimed at her memories. “She felt that you were trying to patch things up between you for the sake of the Blending rather than because you really wanted to be back with her. Can that be true?”
Again Rion held his tongue, but this time with mortification. How could Naran possibly have guessed … ?
“I … don’t quite know how to explain,” Rion groped, using one hand to gesture vaguely. “All of you have spoken to me at various times, concerned about my concerns, so I thought I could … ease everyone’s mind. And I do miss Naran terribly …”
“But you still aren’t past expecting yourself to ‘betray’ Naran again,” Tamrissa said with another sigh. “You haven’t settled that problem in your own mind, and that’s why you were so stiffly formal with her. She said you sounded as though you were proposing a business arrangement.”
“I was simply trying not to raise her hopes too high again,” Rion whispered after closing his eyes. “I’m not a man she can rely on, not when my head was turned so easily the first time. I’d like to think that the same won’t happen a second time, but there’s no way to be certain of that.”
“Nonsense,” Tamrissa stated, and Rion opened his eyes to see that his sister now looked impatient. “Tell me, Rion, do you really think you’re the only person to ever feel tempted by someone other than the one you love? That feeling is called lust, and is differentiated by another name because it’s just physical attraction. It’s only human to find someone other than your love attractive, and there’s nothing wrong with experiencing the feeling. Unless you mean to let the lust rule you from now on. Some people do, you know, and you could well be that sort.”
“What sort is that?” Rion asked, confusion covering him again the way it had in the beginning. “And do you see some … sign that I am the kind to fall to lust again?”
“People who let lust rule them are either desperately in need of being loved or are completely self-centered,” Tamrissa explained, her tone more gentle as her lovely eyes examined him. “The self-centered ones are just out for the pleasure, having no interest in sharing another person’s life. Sharing often calls for sacrifice, and they have no intentions of sacrificing for anyone. Do you think you’re that sort?”
“No,” Rion answered, relieved to be able to give a positive reply to at least one question. “I found my greatest pleasure in sharing with Naran, not in simply taking solitary pleasure. But what of the other sort?”
“The ones who desperately need to be loved?” Tamrissa asked, studying him with her head to one side. “Considering the way you were raised you do need to be loved, a circumstance I understand only too well. But the people in that group need constant reassurance that they’re wanted, which is why they go from lover to lover. Staying with one would be too dangerous, because that one might grow bored and then distracted. Are you afraid that Naran might grow bored with you and go looking for someone else?”
“I constantly marvel that Naran has found any interest in me whatsoever,” Rion answered with complete truthfulness. “If she were to grow bored with me and look about for someone more interesting, I would be devastated but not unduly surprised. Is that the same thing?”
“No, it isn’t, so stop looking so woebegone,” Tamrissa said at once, putting a hand to his arm. “Your whole problem is that you’re not used to having anyone find you attractive. No matter what the rest of us tell you, you still believe the lies that woman fed you while you were growing up. You see yourself as an unwanted outcast, but nothing could be farther from the truth. Why, if I hadn’t met Vallant and you hadn’t met Naran, I would probably be chasing after you myself right now.”
“You would?” Rion asked, his brows having risen of their own accord. “But, Tamrissa … You’re an extremely beautiful woman, turning the heads of most of the men who see you. Why would you possibly look to me?”
“I would look to you not only because I know how decent a person you are,” Tamrissa answered firmly, doing nothing to avoid his gaze. “I would also look to you because you’re an extremely handsome man, broad-shouldered and tall and overall trim. You’re also a marvelous lover, and it must be very difficult for you now that you’re not sharing Naran’s bed. But there’s a very easy way to solve that problem …”
Tamrissa’s words ended with a suggestive smile, and at first Rion was disconcerted. He really did find Tamrissa attractive, just as he did Jovvi, but Naran was more than simply attractive. And yet, he suddenly believed that Tamrissa did find him just as attractive. If he were able to resist her after easing himself, then he could be a good deal more certain about resisting strange women. Yes, her suggestion was a really good one …
“Yes, let’s do solve the problem,” Rion said, turning happily to Tamrissa. “We can lie together tonight once we’ve made camp, thanks to the obsession with privacy that the Gracelians indulge so thoroughly. I’ll await you in my tent, and Tamrissa … thank you.”
He touched her hand to show his thanks more completely, then urged his mount to a faster pace. He was now very eager to reach the place they would camp tonight, hoping fervently that his experiment would work. If he was able to resist Tamrissa after lying with her again, then he would be able to approach Naran with an easy mind and full heart. If not … No, he would not consider defeat, not unless—and until—he had no other option …
I watched Rion ride away, still too stunned to speak a single word. I’d been trying to tell the man that he could get back together with Naran if he made himself forget the nonsense that was keeping them apart, but instead he’d interpreted my suggestion in an entirely unexpected way …
A deep and feeling groan escaped me, a vocalization of everything churning around inside me. After the groan I turned my mount and went looking for Jovvi, not about to struggle with this problem alone. She’d been the one who had suggested I speak to Rion, after all, so now she could figure out what to do about this turn of events. Or at least I hoped she’d be able to figure something out …
“Why are you so agitated?” Jovvi said at once when I reached her, a small frown creasing her forehead. “Obviously things didn’t go well with Rion, but they couldn’t have gone that badly.”
“Would you care to put gold on that opinion?” I countered after turning my horse to pace beside hers, no longer at a loss for words. “I tried to make Rion believe how attractive he is, just as we agreed I would. I also tried to hint that he could ease his bodily demands if he only approached Naran in the right way, but the last part of that suggestion got lost somehow. Rion thanked me for my suggestion with a tear in his eye, and tonight will be waiting for me in his tent.”
“Oh, dear,” Jovvi said as she flinched, obviously picking up my newest emotions without anything to buffer them.
“Don’t you dare ‘oh dear’ me!” I hissed, so furious it was a wonder that the whole world hadn’t gone up in flames around me, “My flirting with Rion was your idea, and now he expects me to lie with him tonight. How am I supposed to stomp on all that gratitude he showed? How am I supposed to explain to Naran what I’m doing? And above all, how am I supposed to tell Vallant why I won’t be in our tent tonight?”
“Please, Tamma, you really must calm down at least a little,” Jovvi said in a choked voice, her hand coming to my arm in a pleading way. “For some reason I can’t block you out completely the way I used to be able to do, and my head is threatening to split. If I can’t think, I won’t be able to help …”
