Not Dating Material (Accidental Love Book 2), page 3
I love how indignant she’s getting on my behalf. “I don’t see how anything we say will make a difference. I mean, I could tackle him while you delete the photos, but even then—how do we know the guy sent them to Eddie? What if they’re saved to the cloud? There are so many different options these days. They have the images—it’s too late.”
“It’s never too late, come on.”
Elle drags me out to her car, and after stopping by her place for long enough for Elle to tone down her makeup, put on a wig, take out her piercing, and change into a suit that probably costs more than my monthly utilities, we’re on the road again.
“So …” I wave a hand over her. “What’s all this?”
“This is Work Elle. And today, I’m your legal representation.”
“Stuff a duck.”
She snorts. “I don’t recommend that.”
“There’s no way he’s going to think I lawyered up for this.”
“You sure? People are pretty stupid.”
“Okay, but why the wig?”
She pats it gently. “Men trust women with hair.”
I laugh and direct her to the U-District because, hey, she’s on a roll, and if she can get these photos gone, I’m not about to fight her on it. I had a boring afternoon ahead of me anyway, so at least this will give it some spice.
“How did you get out of the handcuffs anyway?” Elle asks as she drives.
I’m hit with a flash of Molly’s bare stomach. “New roommate was home.”
“Shit, that was lucky.”
“Sure. Lucky.”
Her face falls, clearly misinterpreting my reply. “Obviously it would have been better that none of it happened in the first place. I’m only saying—”
“It’s fine.” Not only do I have to remember lying there helpless, I’ve been having inappropriate thoughts about my roommate ever since.
When we pull up to Eddie’s apartment block, his car is sitting on the street. “Looks like he’s home.”
“Excellent.” She jumps out of her Audi, straightens her suit jacket, and waves at me to lead the way. Out of all my nightmares, this sits high on my absolutely trucking not list. Facing an ex-hookup with a grudge. Yet I walk ahead anyway, almost curious to see where this goes and trying not to feel sick over the whole situation.
Eddie’s barely opened his door, all floppy hair and curious eyes, when Elle absolutely steamrolls him.
“I hear you’ve received illicit images of my client.”
“I … I …”
“How long has it been since they were sent to you?”
“They … what …” He turns to me. “Seven? What’s going on?”
“You sent your friend to hit on me and then take revenge pictures.”
He pales so fast it’s almost comical. “Oh, fuck.”
“What do you plan on doing with these images?” Elle asks.
“N-nothing. I swear it.” He turns his panicked expression from her to me again. “I swear it, Seven. I haven’t sent them to anyone.”
“But you admit to having them,” Elle pushes.
He mouths wordlessly for a second. “Uh … Well, I …”
“Are you aware that the distribution of nonconsensual pornography is a federal offense?”
“I didn’t distribute them.”
“But your friend did, under your advisement. This doesn’t look good for you.”
Eddie can’t answer. He’s panting like he’s about to hyperventilate.
I step forward before Elle can freak him out more. “I just want the pictures gone.”
“Yeah. Okay.” His eyes have tinged red as he scrambles for his phone, and I watch his hands shake as he opens his photos and starts hitting Delete.
“How can I trust you’ll delete all of them?”
His attention flicks to Elle. “Mark used my phone, and these are the only copies. I swear.”
“Finding it hard to believe you though.”
Eddie swallows thickly. “I didn’t mean any harm by it. I wanted to piss you off so you’d have to talk to me. That’s all.”
I stare at him like he’s grown another head. “That doesn’t make any sense.”
“You don’t know what it’s like,” he says pathetically.
“What what’s like?”
“Seeing your boyfriend with someone else.”
Even though I want to call him out for being a fulloping idiot, I soften my tone. “We weren’t dating. I’m sorry if I gave you that impression, but it was never communicated. I was clear that casual was all I was interested in.”
He glares at me. “Yeah. Okay.”
“If you took that to mean something more, that’s not on me.”
“Not on you?” he asks, some spark jumping back into his voice. “Have you ever stopped, for just a second, and considered how you play with people’s feelings? How you’re sweet and kind and then go radio silent? You might say you want casual, but your actions say otherwise. And you’re a fucking jerk for not picking that up.” He shakes his phone at me. “They’re gone. Now, get out of my house.”
He all but shoves us out the door and slams it behind us.
“Standard victim-blaming behavior. Why is it so hard to find decent men?”
I ignore Elle’s man hate for a second because I know it comes from daddy issues and isn’t directed at me. “You think he really deleted them all?”
“Well, if you’re not interested in filing charges, we have to take him at his word. He was pretty scared of me though, so there’s a good chance you’re fine.”
I sigh and bury my hand in my hair. “That was kinda messed up.”
“What was?”
“The whole thing about me leading people on.”
“Nope. We’re not getting into that. No means no, Seven. Don’t let people convince you otherwise.”
I huff a frustrated laugh as we head for the car. “It reminded me of something Molly said. About men playing games.”
“Were you playing games with the guy?”
“No.” But the more I think about it, the less sure I am. “I don’t think so.”
“Well, if I can give you some professional advice … Be sure. You don’t want to get into that kind of situation again.”
“Yeah, yeah, I hear you.”
“Good.” She yanks the wig off and slides her sunglasses on. “Now, get in the car. I’ll bill you for my services later.”
“Sure. I’ll pay you in good thoughts and feelings.”
“We both know you’re just as broke in those as actual funds. I’m not above you working off your debt.” She pumps her eyebrows. “I could always use a pool boy.”
Chapter 4
MOLLY
The man across from me smiles, lines around his eyes deepening, and I do my best to smile back. He’s a total silver fox, super fucking attractive, and I have to hand it to Madden: he’s given me exactly what I said I wanted.
The problem is, I don’t think I actually know what I want.
I love the maturity of older guys, but it’s so hard to find someone I can connect with. Common ground isn’t something I find easily, and other than generic small talk, everything else leads to conversation that reminds me how different we are.
Gerald shifts forward, leaning over the table between us, eyes sliding down my exposed neck. “You want to get out of here?”
Heat floods my cheeks. This is never my favorite part of the conversation. “Actually, I don’t, you know, on a first date.”
“Ah.” Gerald’s gaze pings away from me, expression closing over. Oh, no. I recognize that look.
“I’m sorry?”
“Don’t be.” He holds up his hand, signaling for the bill. “This has been fun, but if I’m honest, I don’t waste time, kid. You’re cute and all, but I’m not interested in, well …” He waves a hand like he expects the silence to fill in the rest of his sentence. But it doesn’t. And I can’t.
Not interested in what? Dating? Commitment? Me?
And even though I wasn’t sure about him to begin with, panic at being turned down takes over.
“Wait. We can. It’s fine. I just know that usually when I do, men never call back, and so I was trying something different, but if that’s a deal breaker for you …” My throat is closing over, making it hard to get out the rest of my words.
Gerald’s heavy eyebrows bristle. “No. If you have boundaries, you keep them. Just know that they might not always line up with what someone else is looking for.”
“But I’m okay with hooking up!” I assure him, only I do it so loudly the people sitting at the tables either side of us glance over.
His posture tenses, making it clear he’s noticed the attention. “Molly, that’s enough.”
“What? I’m not good enough for you?”
“Keep your voice down.”
My eyes sting with tears. “One minute, you’re asking me to leave with you, and now you don’t want me to?”
“Molly …”
“Take me home. You have my full permission. In fact, we don’t even need to go that far—”
He abruptly stands and grabs his jacket.
“—they have bathrooms here!” I call to his retreating back.
It’s not until I’ve lost sight of the back of his silver head that I realize it’s gone completely quiet around me. So quiet I hear the old man a few tables over tsk in my direction.
All of my self-confidence tries to wither as I numbly stand and sniff those tears away. Embarrassment is not something that will fuck with me today. Shoulders straight, head high, I only need to hold the act until I’m out of here.
I’m past the staring tables.
Halfway across the dining room.
Almost to the doo—
“Sir. You can’t leave until the bill is paid.”
Fuck.
I glance over at the snooty voice, hoping it’s directed at anyone other than me, but two steely eyes are narrowed my way.
I offer what I hope is a friendly smile. “The other gentleman didn’t pay?” He’d specifically said it was his treat, and judging by the Rolex he was flashing around, he could certainly afford it.
“No.” The server folds his arms.
“Right. Of course. Yes.” I scramble for my wallet and thank the universe when I’m able to pull my card out without dropping it. “Here.”
Then I’m left standing right in the walkway while he disappears with my card. I can still feel the weight of people watching me. He’s sneering when he returns and hands it over.
“I assumed someone in your … profession was happy with a twenty percent tip.”
I have no clue what he’s talking about as I take my card back. “Ah, yeah. Thanks. That’s fine.”
He eyes me. “I didn’t realize they let people use an alias on credit cards these days. Happy hunting, Molly.”
Then he turns and walks away.
I leave, face screwed up, confusion helping to keep the disappointment at bay until—
“He thought I was a hooker!”
The words burst from me, startling the family walking past, but I’m too mortified to care. I bolt for my car, yank the door open, and throw myself into the front seat before the tears can come.
As I sit there and sob, I can’t work out what I’m so upset about. In college, I knew plenty of people who engaged in sex work to get by. Stripping and porn … whatever. You do you. But thinking of all those eyes on me, all those people watching and judging and making assumptions about me … thinking I’m beneath them.
Is that what Gerald thought too?
Holy shit. My face is burning, indignation racing through my veins and making my hands shake. Somehow, I get the car on and hit the road, heading home where I can hopefully spend the night in bed, nursing yet another broken heart.
It’s not even broken over Gerald. It’s broken for me and all the effort I put into dating and relationships only to never be enough. I want my person, but I’m beginning to feel like no person wants me.
My tears are sticky on my cheeks by the time I pull up home, and I’ve got a headache building behind my eyes. I park in the driveway, slam the door, then stomp my way inside. As much as I want to run and hide, I make out voices coming from a room down the hall, and I could swear Madden is one of them.
Madden, who set up this nightmare of a date to begin with.
And if I can’t get ragey at fucking Gerald, I sure as hell can get ragey at him.
“What in the hell, Madden?” I gasp as soon as I reach the doorway. “Did you tell Gerald I was a … a … a call boy?”
“What?” He shoves to his feet. “What did he say to you?”
I open my mouth to relay everything, and—nothing comes to mind. “He … he asked to leave together.”
“Okay.”
“And I said no …”
Madden’s soul almost leaves his body, I swear. “Did he try to force you?”
“No, nothing like that. He said it was fine and ended the date.”
“And …”
“And he was leaving!”
“Right …” Madden’s anger is being replaced by confusion.
“Without my number! He was leaving, and I told him that it was fine and I’d go home with him, but then people were staring, and he left anyway, even though I—” I clamp my hands over my mouth as the thought hits me that maybe I brought this on myself.
“Molly …” Madden’s lips curl at the corners. “What did you say?”
“Nothing.”
A chuckle comes from behind Madden, drawing my attention to Seven and Xander.
“You definitely said something,” Seven says.
I look from him to Xander to Madden.
“I maybe said he could do me in the bathrooms,” I rush out. “And everyone heard me.”
Madden’s booming laugh starts first, followed by Seven’s, and then … I let out a huge breath of anxiety and join them.
“What is wrong with me?” I groan. “Why can’t I be normal?”
“Normal’s overrated,” Xander says. “You’re normal for you. If it helps, I would have accepted your offer.”
Seven slaps his thigh. “Down, boy.”
“What?” Xander’s aqua eyes widen. “Molly’s cute as hell. I would have.”
“Thanks,” I say around a grin, then flop onto the couch across from them. As much as laughing has helped, I’m … tired. Ever since my college boyfriend cheated on me, I’ve been more than unlucky in love. It feels like I’m cursed some days. Guys my own age are always too much of a mess in themselves for a relationship, so I made the decision to date older guys and keep striking out there as well. I don’t know if I just keep picking the wrong men or the right ones aren’t interested in someone like me—unless it’s to spread my legs.
I thought I’d found someone back in Kilborough. Ford is one of my dad’s friends. He’s flirty and handsome and seemed like a no-nonsense type of guy. The kind of guy who’d treat me right. But then he went and found himself a boyfriend, and I was so bitter and petty and over never being enough that I’d kissed him.
Safe to say that hadn’t gone well. His boyfriend had been ridiculously kind about it, and then I spent the next few months hiding from both of them until I could move here.
Where Seattle men aren’t much different.
“Why am I so bad at this?” I ask no one in particular.
“You’re not bad at it, Mols,” Madden says, sitting down next to me. “You just haven’t found your man. It’ll happen.”
“Not soon enough.”
“How do we know he’s not bad at it though?” Seven asks.
Xander’s mouth drops. “Don’t be mean.”
“I’m not. It’s a question.” Everything about Seven is rough. From his dark red hair to his large frame to his tattoos and piercings, and then he looks at me with the kindest eyes I’ve ever seen. “You said a lot the other day about lunch dates and calling and messaging … In the nicest way possible, it sounded a little stalkerish, man.”
“Stalkerish?”
“Don’t freak out, I could be wrong. I obviously don’t know you well, but if things are as sucky as you say … maybe it is you.”
No one, and I mean literally no one, has ever even suggested that. My best friend Will is always on my side over how jerkishly I’m treated, Dad always tells me that if they’re not interested, they don’t deserve me, and even Madden, right now, is giving me empty platitudes.
I blink at Seven, my mouth hanging roughly around my ankles. “Me?”
“Whoa, don’t look at me like that.”
“Maybe you need to stop talking,” Xander hisses, then turns to me. “Seven doesn’t always watch his words.”
He huffs. “I watch them, wiener brain. I just don’t sugarcoat things like the rest of you.”
“Some people like sugar.”
“Then I’m not for them.” Seven shrugs, and being so blatantly okay with not being everyone’s cup of tea is something I wish I could learn.
“Maybe it’s me …” I mutter, turning it over in my head. “But how do I know?”
None of them have any answers. But they’re listening. Supporting. Even if Seven’s way of support might not be something I’m used to, it’s nice that they’re here for me when they don’t know me that well.
“I think I’m going to go to bed, but thank you.” I meet Seven’s kind eyes and offer a small smile. “Really.”
Back in my room, I change out of my date clothes and into some pajama bottoms before climbing into bed. I showered before my date and don’t have the energy to do it again.
Instead, I turn the memory of countless men over in my mind, over and over until Gerald and Ford erase the others and then … Seven.
Seven and his tattoos and muscles and blunt words.
Seven and his kind eyes.
Seven and his … piercings.
My cock gives a twitch at the memory, and I lift my blanket to stifle my laugh into it. I’m so immature.
Maybe that’s what Gerald meant?
It’s that thought that sobers me.
A soft creak and a flash of light lets me know someone’s opened my door, but it closes quickly again. I squint into the darkness as light footsteps cross the room.
