Graciella, page 48
Cass nuzzled Gracie, hoping to hide the shiver of desire that flitted through her.
“Was it?” He was standing next to her again. So close that again she felt compelled to lean into him, which was exactly why she didn’t.
“No.” Not mixed, exactly. How much I wanted to keep going, keep exploring. And also everything in my past that makes the waters around me so, so murky for someone so kind and innocent as you. Innocent? Was that really how she saw him. Younger, happy, carefree for sure, but that kiss… She was still simmering from the reaches of its heat.
“A question in your answer again. Does it have to do with your burdens?”
“In a way.” Cass took in the lovely evening light as it settled things into deeper color around them. “Can we… Would it be okay to keep this moment about us, simple for now? It’s too pretty and special to mar.”
Without hesitation, Adam nodded and gave her that gorgeous full-mouth smile again. Even his eyes were full of happiness.
“Gracie’s a pretty name for a pretty girl.”
“She was a shell of herself when she came to me. She’d been wandering from place to place until I bought her. And she hadn’t been treated well. Her coat was dull, she shied away, but I cared for her and with lots of patience she healed. When her light came back, I could see how graceful and sleek she was. At a quick glance she’s fierce and dark, but when she blooms she’s full of joy. She was my Gracie and the first time I called her that she tossed her head and pranced. She was happy, settled. It fit her.”
“Your voice does that to a lady, calls her attention, settles in.” She wanted to get back to the light flirting.
“Is that all it does?”
No. They weren’t touching, unfortunately, but his voice traveled over her like an invitation. Unable to find her own words suddenly, her mouth parched, all she could do was shake her head.
Chapter Fifteen
Adam closed the distance. “Can I kiss you again?”
Another nod. Had he turned her speechless? He understood. He was completely unprepared for conversation at this moment.
Her eyes sparked at his approach, at him resting his hand on her hip, claiming back his favorite spot on her body. I bet she has many, many spots I’d love to call my favorite.
“Please,” she said. Not completely speechless, then, and thank goodness, because her voice was now his favorite song on the wind, a lifeline he’d never known he needed. He tugged her head gently forward, running his fingers through her soft hair and searing their mouths together once more.
This time she didn’t brace against the fence at her back from the storm that raced through them. This time she stood freely, and he was grateful because she used those long, graceful fingers to explore his chest.
She tasted of life and adventure, spices and sugar. “Spicy, sweet Cassandra.”
“No one’s ever called me sweet before,” she said before she joined their mouths again.
“Delicious, sugar and cinnamon and orange.” He dipped his lips to her neck, her cheeks before fumbling back to her mouth. Adam had kissed before, but talking while kissing, teasing and flirting with each was an aphrodisiac.
She arched into him fitting her hips to his. Where they fucking belong. That thought sawed at the last threads of control. Her soft, lush chest pressed up against him, their thighs rubbing against each other. Fuck, even with clothes in their way, his blood, his limbs throbbed with her power rushing between them. Now he wished for the fence at her back. He wanted to walk her up against it and ravage her right there. To have his mate in the wild green pasture under the evening sky and the hint of breeze whispering and teasing, their joined heat swirling around them.
Adam’s blood led him as he took a step into her and she followed with one back. Another and another, their bodies dancing the same dance until Gracie’s whinny and stomping hooves jarred them apart. Cass stared open-mouthed in shock. Her face was wild and alive with flushed cheeks and desire and a gaze that said what in the ever-loving hell was that?
“That was incredible,” he said.
Again, she simply nodded, then bent over to catch her breath, and Adam laughed out his own winded frustration and tried to calm the boiling need inside.
“Good thing you interrupted us, Gracie.” Adam ruffled her mane, but she sidestepped, seeking attention, showing off for Cassandra. Cass recovered from their explosion, or at least did an amazing job of pretending, and interacted with his horse. He couldn’t take his eyes off the woman.
Gracie nudged his head. “Hungry, are you?” Fucking hunger. Have I been starved my entire life? Now he’d had a taste of Cass and he wondered if he’d ever be full. It scored through his heart. A branding that settled in his soul, one more piece of his life clicking into place. The most important part, his heart whispered.
“Shall we feed her?” Cass asked.
“Mmm.” He was still stuck on studying her, learning her, when Gracie swatted him with her tail. “All right, girl. If we don’t, she’ll get ornery.”
“You.” Cass soothed his horse. “I don’t believe you’d get ornery for a second.”
“Ha!” Adam exclaimed. “Hunger and boredom both get her riled up. If she doesn’t eat or get to run like the wind, she pesters us nonstop.”
“As any girl would.” She ran her fingers through Gracie’s mane. “I’d love to ride her sometime. Could I?” With her asking softly like that, her face flushed and eyes excited, he’d give her anything she requested. Gracie sped up her dance, nodding, and they both laughed.
“I think she understands you,” Adam said. “You can ride her whenever you want.” I can’t wait to see you on my horse. His two beauties flying across the land, uninhibited, wild. He wasn’t sure if it momentarily settled his hunger or stirred it to think of her as his, but life as he’d known it before had been altered in a pasture during a few moments of kissing. Lifechanging, electrifying moments. A tidy package all tied up had been ripped open and a whole new world awaited him. It was a strange and heady knowledge and he carried it with him. Hand in hand, he and Cassandra strolled Gracie back to the barn for the night. He gave a whistle and Bullet bounded out of the trees to follow.
Their hands linked, Cass walked nearly aligned with his body. Each touch of their legs, each brush of their arms stoked his need for her, for more, for everything with her.
“I think I like you, Adam.”
“You think?” He choked out the words followed by laughter, at himself most likely. He was the dope in this scenario. While he’d been mentally sketching out their life together, she’d decided she maybe liked him. Whoa, boy did he have his work cut out for him.
She laughed too. And he squeezed her hand. “I sound like a kid passing notes in school, don’t I?” Since their first awkward meeting she let her guard down, said whatever was on her mind. He grinned with the memory. There were many sides to this woman. Bold, intelligent, beautiful, tart, serious, easy, full of burdens, thoughtful. Adam learned more every day. “I just meant—” Her tone had taken on one of regret, all silliness gone.
“Oh.” He got it now and took the kick to his gut. “How did I not see the ‘but’ coming.”
“No, no, not…I don’t…not like you’re thinking. I mean…blech.” She stopped as he led Gracie into her stall and filled her bucket with food. “It’s a good but, I think.”
“There you go with the innuendos this time.” He couldn’t help but grin. She was beautiful in the silhouette, the sun fading behind her and such a serious look on her face while she concentrated on getting her words exactly right.
“Stop flirting with me for one second so I can think.” She held up her hand as if to block him even though they stood more than ten feet apart. Ah, so you feel it too, the topsy-turvy world.
“Promise. Can I flirt more when you’re done?”
“Yes,” she said immediately, and he breathed more easily knowing that all hope was not lost. Maybe it wasn’t a bad but at all.
“I didn’t come here, to Brockman Farms, for anything like this.” She gestured between them. “In fact, I kind of ran away, needed to get away…to be alone and re-center myself in a way.”
“Deal with your burdens?”
She nodded. “It’s been a good thing, the time to think away from my life, interacting with your family, wonderful, delicious naps. I’ve been writing. You.” Her entire face brightened with her smile when she said that last word. “I need to go slow.”
He said goodnight to his horse, closed the barn and, linking their fingers again, walked Cassandra back to her cottage. If slow means a lifetime with you, then sign me up. All these emotions rushed from his heart to his head. He wanted to blurt his words out, but she needed careful and cautious. He could give her both.
“You like me.” He quirked his mouth at her. “But you want to be careful, not get swept away in this awesomeness?” Like he already was. How was he still standing upright? Perhaps his new world had centered around him already, in the span of a few seconds, as he came to know his future would be linked with hers.
“I…I—”
“Jesus.” His stomach sank. “You look like you’re going to faint again.” They’d reached her cottage where she sat abruptly on the stairs and put her head in her hands. “Are you okay? I didn’t mean to freak you out.” Shit, he’d done exactly what he was trying to avoid. He’d been teasing, but something serious was going on in her head.
She took his hand and pulled him down next to her. “I don’t think I’m going to faint. I… It’s hard to talk about.” Cass took a deep breath and in the span of a few silent seconds Adam thought he might faint. “I was married. Once. It feels like it was from a different dimension completely. Especially these last few months. Some days it’s stark and clear in my mind. Others it’s strange and difficult to remember.”
He tried not to display his shock, but sat quietly and listened. Bullet padded over and cuddled up next to Cassandra with his soft puppy head resting next to her leg.
“Nathan. He was killed by a drunk driver seventeen months ago, almost eighteen now.”
“Cassandra, I’m sorry.” She wasn’t carrying regular-sized burdens. Most people would be crushed under her boulders.
“It was awful. Ha.” Her laugh was sharp and bitter. “I mean that’s putting it mildly, isn’t it? Afterward, a lot happened. I lost my dream job. My sense of smell deserted me, and I couldn’t be a food writer without being able to truly enjoy, or hate, for that matter, the food I was reviewing. My boss had me writing about other things for a while, but that didn’t work out. I’ve been sort of dead inside for a long time, until the last few months. Well…” She paused, ruffled Bullet’s fur and turned to him with wet eyes. “I’m so sorry I ruined our beautiful walk.”
“No.” Adam forced out the words that wanted to strangle his throat. “I’m grateful you shared with me. I want to know about your life, your scars as well as your dreams. I…I don’t have the right words. You survived a trauma I suspect many wouldn’t be able to recover from.”
“I wasn’t sure I would for a while. Fortunately, and believe me there were moments when I thought unfortunately, life keeps going and we keep moving forward. I’ve been writing about food again, since I arrived here. So much.” She tangled their fingers together and he watched the color and happiness breathe back into her features. “My sense of smell came barreling back when a handsome farmer threw manure on me.”
Adam threw his head back and groaned. Tension eased out of him. “The fairies were laughing that day for sure.” It was her gentle smile at his silly words that lessened the rest of his shock. He wanted to haul her into his lap and comfort her, then kiss her until no more burdens remained.
Bullet had fallen asleep in a pile of fur and limbs and his snores gave them both a chuckle.
“I do like you, a lot,” she whispered. He brought his focus back to her. Serious but calm expression on her face. Wide-eyed, caution gone. God she was beautiful. He could easily daydream in those eyes of hers forever. “I also want to be careful.” She rubbed her chest. Adam took her hand back and kissed it. They sat under the starlight in silence, the air cradling their emotions between them. When he stood, he tugged her up with him.
Adam wrapped his arms around her. “I promise to be careful with you, Cassandra Dorsey.”
“I squished our lovely evening.”
Adam shook his head. He gave her a gentle kiss. “You didn’t.”
“You’re sure?”
Adam lifted his mutt into his arms. “I can’t believe I’m carrying you home again, you sleep monster.”
Before he headed down the path he said, “That was the best first date I’ve ever had, Cassandra. Sleep well.”
“Goodnight, Adam,” she called through the crisp night air.
A heaviness settled in Adam’s chest on his walk home and it had nothing to do with the weight of his dog asleep in his arms. The cute mutt had had a good date too.
But what were his worries compared to the weight of her burdens? Jesus, married, widowed? How had she survived so much and come out so powerful and strong? It was one more hint of her depths and he was honored she’d told him.
But his mind wouldn’t settle. Her heart had belonged to someone else. Could a person give their heart again? He’d believed he’d only ever give his to one woman. The question that haunted him during his sleepless night was can I compete with a ghost?
Chapter Sixteen
It was freeing to walk up the hill to Brockman House and walk right into the kitchen as herself, hair in a messy ponytail, no makeup on, save for a bit of lip gloss. The familiarity made her smile, hearing the ladies before she entered, breathing in the amazing aromas already simmering on the stove. Her mind buzzed with new essay ideas.
“Hi, Cass,” Miranda called.
But today it wasn’t the baked goods that snagged her attention at first. Now those are some good genes. She’d met each of the brothers, but the three of them standing side by side, well, it was downright unfair to the rest of the male population. Tall and sexy, and unbelievably fit from hard daily labor. The force from their grins nearly blinded her. Although the youngest, Adam was nearly half a foot taller than both his brothers, and wider too. All those muscles she wanted to learn about on an intimate basis. Goodness, it made her shiver.
“Yeah, good morning, Cass,” Turner drawled and not-so-subtly elbowed Adam.
“Boys,” she tossed back. He wasn’t the only one who could tease. And they did look boyish today. Especially Adam in his old T-shirt, worn jeans and a baseball hat that had seen better days two decades ago. He wore it backward and when he smiled at her, she was struck with the knowledge that he was happy. It surrounded him. They all were. His mouth…mmm, that mouth ignited her dreams. But even it was powerless against the food amazingness seducing her senses.
“Wow!” Cass gazed in reverence. Setting her bag down, she nearly drooled over the pan as the steam hit her in the face. Best spa treatment ever. Cinnamon roll facial.
“Yeah,” Miranda sighed as she put one on a plate for Cass. “I think this was when I first fell in love here.”
“Yeah, with me, gorgeous,” Cruz said.
“No, honey, with Elena.”
The brothers burst out laughing.
Cass tried to camouflage her drooling sigh. I could play that sound on repeat all day.
Miranda held up half of her gooey roll. “Can you blame me?”
The rolls were hypnotic. All three men followed the path of Miranda’s knife as she separated the caramelized, puffy, perfection. They were snagged and in mouths faster than Cass could yell, “Interception!” She must have been gawking because Adam asked, “You going to eat yours, Cassandra?” He said her name as if it were an invitation to sin.
“Now, there’s a way to win her heart,” Turner said. They were all staring at her. Was Adam supposed to win her heart? Did she want him to? But really they were all a bunch of hooligans—their gazes were centered on her plate.
“Some things are more important than love,” Adam said solemnly before he reached his long, tan, muscled arm out, snagged her cinnamon roll and took off jogging out through the back door. He turned once to give her a wink before he was gone, leaving Cruz and Turner standing stunned in the kitchen.
“He… I… Wait,” Turner sputtered. “Dammit, he got the last one again. How the hell does he do it? Every single time.”
“Bastard. He’s got skills,” Cruz said in awe as he studied his own empty plate.
They weren’t the least bit sorry that she was the one who’d had her pastry stolen, which made Cassandra laugh. Adam had done it for that reason, she suspected, to lighten the mood, let her off the hook from the win-her-heart comment.
“Well, it’s a good thing for you poor souls that I have another tray right here,” Miranda said. “Now get out of the kitchen unless you’re going to help. Too much of a distraction.”
“You could open a café with these.” Cass leaned into the new tray. “Damn, sugar, cinnamon, caramelized nuts. Someone knew what they were doing when they put that combination together.”
“Did I miss all the good stuff?” Lily flew into the kitchen and, even in her work clothes and with her hair pulled back under a hat, exploded with beauty and confidence.
Cass hummed. “You didn’t miss these. I might need another, or ten.”
“Not those.” Lily sighed like they were all four-year-olds and she needed to speak very slowly. “Did I miss all the talk about your date with Adam last night?”
Choking on the best cinnamon rolls in the universe was not an act Cass wanted to add to her skills.
“I’m so sorry!” Lily patted her back gently.
“Maybe you’re not meant to have one of these today.” Miranda laughed.
“Hopefully third time’s a charm,” Cass said, sipping her creamy coffee to soothe her throat. Coffee tastes really weird to me today. She pushed the cup back. At least I can smell it again. She pushed it even farther away. Not smelling so great either.
