Lost Girl, page 14
‘That isn’t possible, I mean …’ he said, confused. ‘Are you sure she was there?’
‘No, Phavit,’ she sighed. ‘I am not sure. That is why I did not say anything about her. She has been a fantastic friend and I did not want her in trouble of any sort. I don’t want her to be hauled into all this just because I am imagining things.’
Phavit leaned against his motorcycle. Was there no end to all this. ‘What do you want me to do, Shanaya? I could talk to her, I guess.’
‘I am sorry. I keep entangling you in all of my shit. But I really don’t know what to do. What could we ask her?’
Phavit turned it over in his head. If Nima was lying about knowing the guy it could mean she knew all along who Shanaya was. ‘It is okay, Shanaya. You don’t have to apologise or anything. It is what friends are for. This is what we will do. I will keep an eye on her. If she is up to something we will find out. And don’t worry about getting her into trouble. We will keep this between us till we know for sure, I promise.’ Maybe, just maybe, Shanaya had been mistaken
She smiled at him wanly, ‘I don’t know what I would have done without you.’
‘You would have figured out something,’ He gave her a playful pat on her head ignoring the deep ache her words were creating in him. He wished it meant something more.
Eleven
Phavit squatted down on the floor behind the counter, looking for some papers Vanessa had told him to send to the accountant. She had left town later that morning but not before warning him not to take any foolish risks. She also asked him to keep Shanaya safe. Like he could tell Shanaya what to do, he thought wryly. By now they should have figured out that she did exactly as she pleased. Yes, she trusted him but lately, he wondered if even that was true. She had kept a lot of things from him.
‘You are the only friend she believes in and trusts. So please keep her safe.’ Vanessa had said. ‘And Phavit, I am sorry things didn’t work out.’ She had added, like she hadn’t been able to help it.
‘Sorry?’ he tried to brush it off, as casually as he could. ‘Whatever for?’
She had come near and laid a hand on his shoulder. ‘You have been like a son to me and Aiden. I am not blind, you know. I have seen you with Shanaya.’
He looked away then. So the whole world knew, he really should work on keeping his feelings better hidden. ‘We all know she came with her past, Vanessa. If I have developed feelings for her, it is not her fault, is it? She never looked at me in any other way. I was always her friend, nothing more. I knew one day she would go back to her life, to her past. I know and accept that. I am just glad I have been there for her.’
His words sounded hollow in his ears though, when he was feeling as he felt. It was like every time he imagined her with that other man, a knife twisted in his guts. All he could think of was the way Shanaya smelt when she was near him, the way she tilted her head a little when she laughed or the way her nose would turn red when she was cold or when she cried. The pain was almost physical. Phavit avoided Shanaya all morning, trying hard to stay out of her way. Though he had told her that things hadn’t changed between them, he still needed time. Being close to her was getting difficult, like he couldn’t breathe. That small little hope that he had been holding on to that perhaps someday she would see him differently was now shattered.
Preoccupied with thoughts of Shanaya and how he desperately needed to get over her, he often found himself just sitting and staring into space. Like now, he was sitting in the same position for five minutes, not really focussed on what he was doing. Nima had taken one look at him when he came in and asked him what was wrong. He hadn’t really answered her, just shrugged and went about his work. But she had been pestering him, trying to get him to talk. Now, she walked up to the counter and banged the tray on it, startling him back to reality.
‘Still brooding?’ she asked, sardonically.
‘Brooding? I don’t brood,’ he snapped. He pretended to rifle through the huge stack of files, trying to remember what he was doing there. The stack collapsed near his feet and he sat back, looking at it despondently. Nima vaulted over the counter easily and crouched next to him.
‘Phavit? Look at me.’ she said. He did, looking her in the eye. ‘Is something wrong between you two? Are you guys fighting?’
‘Who?’ he asked deliberately picking up the files.
‘Don’t act coy. You know I mean Shanaya.’ She was getting irritated. ‘Normally, you would be following her around. Today you have been hiding away, avoiding her,’ she said her eyes narrowing.
‘I am not…’ he began. So she had been watching them. He had never thought about it before, but she did seem a little more interested in what happened between him and Shanaya. More than was necessary perhaps. He had always put it down to their friendship and a soft spot for him. But now thinking back he felt like she had been trying her best to throw them together since the very first day. He frowned. She clicked her fingers in front of his face.
‘Hey, focus.’ She said. ‘So what’s wrong?’
Phavit gathered the files and looked back at her steadily. ‘No Nima, we are not fighting. Can I go back to my work? I really have a lot on my plate right now.’ On any other day he may have confided in her. But not today. Shanaya’s words rang in his ear. I think I saw Nima out there too.
‘Phavit,’ she gave him a reproachful glare. ‘You know you can talk to me. Tell me what happened? Is it that other guy?’
Phavit narrowed his eyes at her and pursed his lips and asked softly, ‘What other guy, Nima? Who are you talking about?’ his question seemed to unsettle her.
Nima hurriedly got to her feet. ‘I meant, the guy, the tourist…’ she stopped midway and he heard her curse under her breath.
He looked up at her and saw her pale considerably as if she was looking at a ghost.
‘Nima?’
She looked down at him, her eyes large and unfocussed and then back again over the counter. She appeared shaken. ‘I…I just remembered something.’ She muttered, moving away hurriedly.
Phavit watched her go, perplexed. He had never seen her so shaken. He stood up and looked in the direction she had been staring, wondering what had spooked her. His mouth fell open. Yug sat at one of the tables, looking back at him. When he spotted Phavit he raised a hand, as if in greeting and for a moment Phavit was thrown. He was sure Yug had never met him, not face-to-face anyway and here he was waving at him as if they were acquaintances. Maybe he needed something, perhaps someone to serve him?
Phavit vaulted over the counter, landing on his feet on the other side. Yug was still watching him, as he walked up to the table. But as he neared the table, Phavit realised that this wasn’t Yug. Except for the grey eyes and the mop of long black curls, there was nothing similar about him and Yug, though from a distance, one could mistake them for each other. This man was taller and broader, his hair a lot curlier. Phavit stopped a little distance away and the man rose to his feet, still watching him as if he was expecting him to come to him. Clearly, he wanted him to. Phavit walked the rest of the way to the table. It would have been rude not to.
‘Hi, I am Phavit Thakur, I work here. I am sorry, I thought you were…someone else and came up to you to talk. Did you need help?’ There was a pot of tea and some sandwiches, untouched in front of him. ‘Is the food not…?’
‘No there is nothing wrong with the food,’ he shrugged, his grey eyes fixed on his face. ‘And I know, you mistook me for someone else,’ the man extended a hand and Phavit took it. He had a strong accent. Not local, he realised.
‘You know?’ Phavit blinked. For a moment they stared at each other and then it struck Phavit. ‘You are the man who saved Aiden’s life.’ He fit the description, Aiden had given them. He was tall, taller than him and well built. He even had grey eyes and from this near, Phavit could see the gold flecks in it. His curly hair was a little unkempt as if it hadn’t seen a comb in ages and was long, almost touching his shoulders, like Yug’s. Phavit could see why Aiden would have mistaken him for Yug. They almost looked alike and yet they didn’t. While Yug was good looking and well turned out, this man was a little unkempt. There were dark circles under his eyes and he looked like he badly needed a shave. Yug had the naturally lean physique of men from the hills, but this man was built like a jock. Phavit could see the sloping angle of his cheekbones, the deep cleft in his chin and a certain tiredness in his eyes, more like he was carrying some huge burden. This man was also definitely younger than Yug, more his own age. Phavit realised that the similarities between both men was more a perception than anything else.
The man released his hand and thrust it into his pockets. ‘So he told you about it?’ He was saying. ‘You are pretty close to the family, Mr Thakur.’
‘And you know my name. Why am I not surprised? It looks like you do know a lot about us.’ He eyed him contemplatively. ‘Who are you?’
The man smiled, though the smile did not reach the eyes. ‘I know you are interested in the hospitality business rather than your family business. I also know that your father is quite an influential man here and that you are a really good friend to…hmm…Shanaya.’
Phavit eyed him warily, ‘That is not creepy or stalker-y at all.’
The man sat back down, seemingly relaxed, his hands clasped loosely on the table in front of him. But Phavit could sense a sort of leashed tension in him. Like he was play acting. ‘I have done my homework.’ He smiled.
‘Who are you?’ Phavit asked impatiently.
He must have been on the road for quite some time because his clothes though rich were crumpled and looked like he had slept in them. The long trench coat and the cricket cap that he had kept aside were dusty.
‘Coffee?’ he offered, pouring it out and sliding it towards him.
Phavit hesitated, ‘I have to attend to…work.’ He was torn between finding out who this mysterious man was and running up to find Aiden.
‘Please, Mr Thakur, I need just a few minutes of your time. Humour me?’ The grey eyes held a hint of urgency pleading.
Phavit looked back at him contemplatively. His need to find out who this man was and why he was so interested in all of them won over and he sat down.
The man poured himself a cup and took a deep gulp. He then put down the cup and sighed. The man was tired, Phavit thought sympathetically.
‘So are you going to tell me who you are?’
‘If I did, will you promise not to jump up and run or worse make it seem like I told you something really shocking?’ he countered, with a smile. ‘I think we are being watched and I would not want to warn them that I have told you anything of importance.’
Phavit gave a short laugh, ‘That is ridiculous. Who would be watching us?’
‘Your friend? The girl you were talking to, I believe her name is Nima. She has been watching us since you walked up to me,’ he continued.
‘Nima? Why would…?’ he stopped, remembering what Shanaya had said about Nima.
He waited for Phavit to assimilate what he was saying and then continued smiling as if they were having a general friendly conversation. ‘Smile, Mr Thakur, you don’t want to alert her.’
Phavit was not really good at pretending but he did as he was told. ‘Okay, so tell me. Who are you? And you better be quick because this is getting really, really weird.’
‘Yug Agarwal,’ he said.
‘Yug Agarwal,’ Phavit whispered as the smile was wiped out of his face. ‘How is it…?’ He began.
‘Smile, Mr Thakur,’ the man reminded him and Phavit forced himself to smile through his shock.
‘If you are Yug Agarwal then who is…?’
‘The other guy? I don’t know who he is and I have no way of proving my identity just yet. On my way here I had my papers and photographs stolen from me, I am guessing by him. I don’t even know why. But what I do know is that he is manipulating Shanaya and only you can protect her. I know she likes you, trusts you. That is why I had to see you.’
Phavit couldn’t keep the fake smile on his face. It struck him that if this indeed was Yug Agarwal, then he was Shanaya’s fiancé and he was assuming that Phavit was close to Shanaya. He blinked and said hastily, ‘Listen, um, Yug, I don’t know what you think is going on between Shanaya and me, but we are just friends. She’s needed a good friend to cope with all that she has endured, and I just stepped in … that’s all. I mean, it would be hard not to like her.’
‘You mean love her?’ Phavit flushed at the man’s direct question. He saw a hint of sadness in the grey eyes. A sense of loss.
‘She doesn’t love me, if that is what you are implying. Not like that, anyway,’ he said quickly. ‘You don’t have to worry about that.’ Why did he feel the need to defend himself to this man; someone he wasn’t even sure was speaking the truth?
The man gave a self-derisive smile. ‘She has forgotten me, Mr Thakur. That is the truth.’
‘Maybe she hasn’t. She hasn’t met you so how would you know? Maybe that is why… ’ Phavit suddenly stopped, and the other man leaned forward eagerly.
‘That is why what?’ All his pretensions of being relaxed gone. Phavit could see the pulse beat at the base of his throat.
‘She told me …’ Phavit said, slowly. ‘She told me she wasn’t sure she could trust the other guy. She found him familiar, yes, but she wasn’t convinced that she is engaged to him. Maybe she finds him familiar because he looks so much like you.’ Phavit leaned forward, his pulse quickening as he realised something. ‘If you talked to her maybe she would recognise you. It could be our chance to jog her memory.’
The man shook his head, looking appalled. ‘I couldn’t just walk up to her and tell her I am Yug. I mean …’ he blinked. ‘If she doesn’t recognise me, I wouldn’t know what to do. We can’t force her to remember, right?’ he looked down at his clasped hands, frowning. ‘I believe she blacks out if… How am I supposed to talk to her at all?’ his voice was tinged with desperation.
‘If the other guy can do it, why can’t you? Yes, it is a possibility, but…if you don’t confront her, don’t give her a chance, how would you know?’ He paused. ‘Are you afraid she will remember something she isn’t supposed to? Did you have anything to do with what happened to her?’ he asked sharply.
Yug gasped, looking genuinely shocked. ‘Is that what you think? That I did this to her? I swear I would never hurt her. I love her.’
‘So if you do, prove it. Talk to her. You are here and yet not ready to face her. It is making me question your motives.’
To Phavit’s surprise, he nodded in agreement. ‘I know,’ he said. ‘Perhaps my story is very unbelievable. I mean who would believe that I am who I say I am without proof? Telling them I got robbed is so convenient. I did not even know she was alive, let alone here till just a few days ago, when we, my mother actually, received a mail telling us about her. But I am telling you the truth. It’s why I haven’t gone to the Josephs yet. I mean, what do I even tell them?’ He leaned towards Phavit, his eyes pleading. ‘I am not here to harm Shanaya. I had no hand in whatever happened to her. In fact, I have struggled these past two years trying to understand it myself. Of course, I haven’t been an ideal fiancé, not even a good friend. Just before … just before she disappeared, I … we fought. Over something silly,’ he said, looking miserable. ‘At first I thought she just had enough of me and had walked away. I desperately tried to look for her and then when I couldn’t find her, I believed her dead.’ He stopped speaking, staring unseeingly at the empty cup in front of him. ‘You see, I may not have physically harmed her, but part of what happened to her was my fault.’ His voice was a little above a whisper.
‘What do you mean, Mr Agarwal?’
He gave a self-derisive laugh, rubbing his hands across his face. ‘If I hadn’t been such a stupid, selfish ass, she may have confided in me. I would have known what was happening in her life. Instead, I was so wrapped up in my own insecurities that I lost her.’
‘So you really don’t know anything? Anything at all?’ Phavit couldn’t help but feel disappointed.
Yug shook his head. ‘I don’t know how she came to be here, so far away from home. I am not sure what happened in those days prior to her disappearance. I have been hiding in the shadows trying to find the answers. What I am certain of is that the guy calling himself Yug is involved in all this, somehow.’
‘Maybe you can find out what happened to her by staying in the shadows, but don’t you get it? She can remember what happened, if she gets her memories back. And you may be the key to that. If you meet her face to face, talk to her, maybe you could jog her memory. So far, we have had no luck whatsoever about finding out anything about what happened to her. The doctors who treated her believed that if she was to go back to familiar surroundings, she could recover her memories. But there was nothing familiar here to help her remember. If what you say is true, then you are what she needs. Do you know how hard it has been for her? Not just the injuries or the fact that she does not remember. She feels … she believes, that she must have been a bad person, and that must be why no one’s come looking for her.’ Phavit spoke passionately. If this guy in front of him was who he said he was, and had really loved Shanaya enough to contemplate spending a lifetime with her, he would be the right person to bring her back.
Yug leaned back in his chair, his eyes half closed, again as if he was thinking. Phavit wanted to reach out and give him a good shake.
‘I can see why she likes you, why she trusts you so much,’ Yug said, giving Phavit a half-smile, and Phavit suddenly knew, without doubt, that this man loved Shanaya. ‘You are a good man, Mr Thakur. Better than me. I could never be so selfless. I was always so jealous and possessive.’
Phavit shrugged ‘That is irrelevant, Mr Agarwal. You are here now, aren’t you? What is more selfless than that? Two years and you are still trying to find her. Find out what had happened to her. You came all the way and you are risking your life for her. I know you think she has forgotten you, but all she needs is a gentle nudge in the right direction. Meet her. Tell her the truth and let her decide,’ Phavit pleaded.
