The Edge of Reason, page 20
“If I say no, you stop?” He nods, his eyes never wavering from mine. “If there’s something I don’t like or can’t do…”
“We don’t do it.”
“Then yes, I understand. And yes, I’d like you to do everything you just said to me.”
“Then come with me.”
Twenty-Three
Drew
* * *
I lift Margot up and off the counter, draping her around me as I carry her up the stairs. My mind is a swirl of toxic poison. Of murderous intent. Something I don’t want her to see. How difficult would it be to find this asshole and kill him? Not very. I mean, I know Margot’s last name. Hell, I bet I could call her brother and he’d tell me. I bet he’d be all too willing.
The simple truth is, I don’t have to physically kill him to destroy him.
A few phone calls are all it will take. Some money. Easy. Simple. Done.
And suddenly, everything feels clear.
“You’re still bleeding, Andrew.” Shit. I unclench my fist. “I need to bandage that up properly before you get cellulitis.”
I roll my eyes at my adorable nurse. “I’m not getting cellulitis from a scratch.”
“Scratches don’t bleed like that.”
“Fine. You can play nurse for me.”
I wink at her and she shakes her head, not amused. She hates that I punched Julien. That I punched the mirror. That I bleed and hurt for her. That I risked myself in her name. I stare at her, really stare at her as we hit the landing at the top of the steps.
This girl… She doesn’t get it. “You’re so fucking brave.”
She scoffs, her gaze cutting away from me, but I don’t miss the way her chin quivers. God, she really does have the self-esteem of an insect. She sees broken when I see courage and beauty. Margot is a survivor. And with that comes battle scars. But those scars aren’t ugly. That’s what she fails to recognize.
Those scars are part of what make her so irresistible to me.
“You’re this adorable, sexy, and insanely stubborn woman. You’re silly and wild and never afraid of making a fool of yourself or laughing when you do.” A tear drops to her cheek, quickly followed by another, but that’s all there are. Just those two. So goddamn brave. “You fight like no one I’ve ever met. My scrappy girl who doesn’t take shit from anyone while cursing up a storm. You’re constantly working overtime to make not only yourself but everyone around you, better. There is no give up in you, and I think that might be what draws me to you the most. Your heart. Your incredibly gorgeous heart is so full of others. So giving and willing to accept. So genuine and deep. Do that for yourself, sweetheart. Love yourself the way we all love you, and that darkness will never be able to touch you again.”
Her face drops into the crook of my neck, breathing in and out in slow deep breaths as she trembles in my arms. She squeezes me tight and finally, after an endless moment of holding her in the shadows of the hall, she whispers, “I’m trying.” She is and that’s also why I love her so much. Part of me feels like I should lay her on my bed and make love to her. But I don’t think that would satisfy either of us right now. She needs to lose herself to someone who knows how to handle her, and I need to satisfy the beast raging within me.
“Kiss me,” I whisper back, licking and nipping and biting at her sweet skin. “Kiss me, Margot. Kiss me so I know you’re mine. So I know you’re as deep into this with me as I am with you.”
She rears back and slams her mouth down on mine, the impact forcing me to take a step back before I regain my bearings. A rush of lust hurls into me, stealing my breath and tightening my stomach as I launch us toward my bedroom. Our mouths are fused as one, my tongue exploring every inch of hers as we duel. My hands squeeze her ass hard before I smack it and she emits a tiny whimper that I greedily swallow down.
Her impatient fingers attack the cotton of my shirt, ripping it away and throwing it over my head in her haste. That’s when she decides to bring this to a whole other level. Margot squirms out of my arms, dropping to her knees before me.
Her dark eyes graze over my abs and chest as she undoes the button on my jeans. The zipper slides down loudly, a clink of metal on metal until there is nothing left but her hot breath fanning across my aching cock. She takes me in hand, her eyes finally landing on mine.
Dear God in heaven, that’s a sight like nothing else.
A groan slips past my lips as she tentatively licks the head, over the drop of precum, before she takes me so deep in her mouth, I hit her tonsils. My head falls back, my eyes closing for a second at the incredible sensation of it, before I lower my gaze again, unwilling to miss a second of Margot feasting on me like nothing has ever tasted so good. Our eyes lock as she sucks me in, sliding up and down and bringing her hand in on the action, pumping me, playing with me, driving me absolutely goddamn insane with pleasure.
My fingers rake into her hair, holding the strands tight against her scalp. I don’t force her. I don’t even encourage her, because she’s doing a damn fine job all on her own.
But this is more than just a blowjob and both she and I know it.
This is her owning her sexuality. Taking control of something she’s always felt out of control with.
She has me, and she knows it. The small smile at the corner of her lips tells me so.
Time to mix this up.
I tug on her hair until she releases me with a wet pop. I force her to stand, her expression wracked with nervous desire. I told her what I want to do to her. But she has no idea what she’s about to get. I take a step back.
“Take off your clothes and wait for me.”
I turn around, enjoying the fleeting glimpse I catch of her eyes widening in surprise. I walk into my closet, flip on the light, and take my jeans off the rest of the way, leaving on my boxer briefs. I don’t have a lot to work with. Aria was the last relationship I was in and she was not into playing all that much. After her, there were a series of intermittent one-night stands and those are certainly not the type of encounters you bring out the full guns for.
So with Margot, I’m going to have to improvise.
I don’t wear a lot of ties. I’m a doctor in the emergency room. We wear scrubs for a reason. But I manage to find three silk ties that will have to do. Shutting off the light to the closet, I exit, staring at a beautifully naked Margot. She’s stoic, quiet, hardly breathing, and that’s like throwing down the gauntlet. I fully intend to make her insatiably responsive, scream at the top of her lungs, and so worked up she’ll have trouble catching her breath.
“Good girl,” I praise, knowing just how much she likes it when I call her that. I reach her, wrapping one of the ties around my good fist and running the smooth, cool material over her neck, upper chest, shoulders, and finally, her breasts and hardened nipples. “This isn’t my lifestyle. I don’t have a list of rules or things. No safe words. If you tell me to stop, I stop.”
“No red room of pain?”
“No. But if you like, I can build you one.”
She smirks, her tense shoulders relaxing and that’s what I need from her. Trust.
“Maybe we should just start with this.” At my words, her gaze lasers in on the navy tie in my other hand, and now it’s my turn to smirk. Wordlessly, I bring it up to her eyes, pressing the silk over them before tying it tightly in the back. Her breath catches as I walk her backwards blindly, but instead of taking her to my bed, I bring her over to the chair I have in the corner. It’s a big fat leather cushioned chair that I never use or sit in.
Dropping Margot down into it, her body trembles when she hits the cold leather. I grin, debating for a moment if I should tie her legs open or bind her wrists. I only have so many restraints.
Something I plan to remedy in the near future.
I opt for wrists because the idea of her long legs wrapped around my head is too good to pass up. Once I have her arms secured behind her back, the binding secured to the chair, I position her so she’s teetering on the edge of the leather, unstable and a lot off balance.
“Drew?” she questions, her voice shaky.
“I’m right here, sweetheart,” I whisper in her ear, gliding my nose along her cheek and neck, breathing her in.
She’s insanely turned on. That much is obvious, but how much of that is based in fear of the unknown or anticipation, I don’t know. Her chest is heaving, the enticing scent of her filling the air. I lean back on my haunches, taking in every single inch of her like this. She’s a vision. My dick jerks against my briefs, reminding me it wants in on this action, but the greedy bastard will have to wait.
“You’re so stunning. Look at you.” My fingertips caress over the skin of her belly, thighs, and the smooth mound of her pussy. “So fucking beautiful. So fucking special. So fucking mine.”
Her head tips back on a moan as my finger glides up and down her wet slit. I watch, enraptured and awestruck. I don’t think a man has ever been this turned on. I know a woman has never been created who is more perfect for me. Her trust is a goldmine. Her body a treasure trove. Her mind a kingdom. And I plan on pushing all to their very limits.
My mouth captures one of her nipples, sucking and biting on the tender flesh. Her hips jerk into my hand. I don’t have to slip my fingers in to know that she’s close. I already know her body, her sounds, and movements so well. Know just the right things to do to get her there. Too bad I’m not about to grant her the privilege of coming just yet.
I abandon her pussy, loving the frustrated growl she unleashes. “Patience,” I hum into her, my now free hand coming up to cup the other delectable breast, squeezing and rolling her nipple. “I love these,” I murmur.
“I was so close.”
I grin against her. “I know.”
“You’re evil.”
My grin grows into a smile. “I know.”
“I hate you.”
I shake my head, all my teeth showing. “You love me.”
She doesn’t confirm nor deny, and frankly, this isn’t the moment for that.
My face drops to the heaven between her legs, my hands splaying her open wide, holding her there as I suck her clit into my mouth. She jolts, tugging against the restraints, quivering against my touch. Her moans are like none before it.
Coarse and desperate.
Her body arches, rocking into me as I lick her, plunge my tongue deep inside, and finally give her exactly what she’s begging me for. Margot comes wildly on a scream, thrashing this way and that since she can’t pull back thanks to my hands on her legs and she can’t push me away thanks to her hands being bound behind her back. She’s at my mercy, and she’s loving every second of it.
When she finally sags back against the cold leather of the chair, goose bumps exploding along her skin, I untie her, rubbing at her wrists. “I think I’m dead. Officially. You can pronounce me anytime.”
I chuckle, sliding up the tie still covering her eyes. They pop open, happy and filled with wonder. “Hi,” I say with a gleam in my own.
She offers me a shy smile in return. “Hi.”
“So…I’m going with not dead since you’re looking at me.”
“Or maybe this is my own version of heaven and you’re here with me.” She tilts her head and I’m so gone on this girl.
“Anywhere you go, I’m going. Heaven or hell.”
“I’ve had enough hell. I think I’m due for some heaven.”
I lean in, kissing her lips softly. Gently. A stark contrast to the workout I just gave her. “I can give you heaven. Come on.”
She groans playfully as I tug on her hand, pulling her up and off the chair. “I have to move?”
I roll my head over my shoulder, meeting her eyes as I lead her to the bed. “You’re about to move a whole lot.” I point to the bed and she dutifully climbs on. I grab a condom out of my nightstand, remove my briefs, and then follow her on. She’s staring at my cock like she wants another taste, but I have plans for her and that mouth. Mainly, screaming out my name as she rides me.
Positioning my back against my headboard, I glove up and take her hand, helping her to straddle me. Her eyes meet mine, my hands shifting to her hips as she lowers herself onto me. A rush of air swooshes past my lungs. So tight. So wet. So goddamn perfect.
“I’m on the pill, you know,” she hums, rocking forward and back. “And I’m clean.”
“Me too,” I rasp, my eyes closing as she grinds herself against me, bouncing lightly, testing what feels good.
“Then maybe next time we can try this without a condom.”
“You tell me that now?” I groan, my head slamming back against the fabric as she starts to rise and fall, sliding along my cock. She giggles, but the sound gets lost on one of her breathy moans. My hands cup her full tits, loving the hell out of the way they overflow my hands, bouncing with her movements. I could live and die in this moment and never want to come up for air again.
Margot. She’s it. She’s everything. And I lose myself in that. In being inside her. In watching her blissed-out face. In feeling her warm flesh against my hands. In tasting her essence on my tongue. In smelling her scent everywhere.
Before I know what I’m doing, I flip us around, pulling her up onto her knees, her hands anchoring to the wall above my headboard. I enter her from behind, slamming into her over and over again.
I can’t get enough.
I can’t stop.
She feels too damn good. Her head falls forward, her fingers searching for purchase in the wall that they’ll never find. The sound of skin slapping skin pierces the air, our moans of pleasure competing. My hand encloses around her throat and I hold it there, applying gentle pressure without squeezing too hard, and I fuck her into an earth-shattering orgasm that has us both bellowing out in a pleasure unlike any other.
Collapsing back, my hand falls to my chest over my heart that’s exploding beneath it. Jesus Christ. What the hell just happened? I think I blacked out. I definitely saw stars.
Margot falls beside me, equally as dazed, and for the longest time, we just lay like that, stunned stupid by how absurdly unimaginably incredible that just was.
“Is it always like this?” she asks after forever.
“No. It’s never been like this.” I roll on my side, cupping her face in my hand and angling her until her eyes meet mine. “It’s you. It’s us.”
Her smile is blindingly exquisite. “Then sign me up for more.”
Twenty-Four
Margot
* * *
“Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?” the adorable nine-year-old boy who has been flirting with me all night asks.
“Why?” I grin. I already know this one. He’s hardly the first kid to come through these doors and try to tell jokes to deflect pain or reality.
“Because he got stuck in the crack.” And legit, I still laugh because it’s a good joke and he tells it with enthusiasm. The poor kid with type 1 diabetes who has a miserable time keeping his blood sugars under control and is in DKA–diabetic ketoacidosis–gleams at me. He really is cute. One day, he’ll drive the girls wild.
“That’s great. Did you make it up, funny man?”
If possible, his smile widens. He shakes his head, blushing just a bit. “No. I heard it from a friend.” Amazing what a little insulin and fluids can do to someone.
“Well, it’s awesome. Thank you for telling me that one. I’m going to spread it around to all my friends and claim I made it up.” I wink at him and his cheeks go from blushing to flaming. So adorable. “Don’t tell anyone, okay?”
“Promise.”
That’s when Drew pops his head in. “I’ve got a bed for you upstairs.” The kid frowns and Drew chuckles. “Sorry, bud, but you can’t stay down here forever. You have to spread your charms upstairs on all the nurses there. Your parents should be back in a second. They’re just finishing up some paperwork.”
I scowl over at Drew. “You know you’re taking away my favorite patient.”
Drew tosses his hands up in the air, feigning helplessness.
“I can come back,” the kid promises.
“You better not,” I warn, trying for stern. “If you do, then everyone will know that it’s not my joke I’m telling.” I give his shoulder a squeeze. “Go upstairs and get that dope new pump. It’s going to rock your world and make you feel so much better.”
He nods. “Yeah. Okay. See you, Margot. Thanks.”
“Later, dude. Make sure you smile that handsome smile of yours at the nurses upstairs. They won’t be able to resist you.” He laughs, shifting away and turning into a rendition of a tomato. I wish boys stayed like this. Sweet, innocent, and eager to please.
I walk out of his room, strolling past Drew with an indifference I obviously am not pulling off. Maybe it’s my stupid, lovesick grin. Maybe it’s the way my cheeks pink up like that kid’s. Maybe it’s the way I squirm because one sideways glance and I’m imagining all kinds of dirty, naughty things he could potentially be conjuring up for me.
“Nurse Cady?” That’s seriously not what he calls me, so I know he’s messing with me.
“Yes, Doctor Albright?” I actually do call him that here so…yeah.
“I need a word. Or your mouth.”
His hand grips mine, and before I know what’s happening, I’m dragged helplessly, like the damsel in distress I am not, into a dark corner in between the last trauma room and the isolation room.
“This is completely inappropriate, Doctor.” My face turns away from his. “I plan on bringing this up to my union representative.”
He growls into my skin and I can’t stop myself from rocking into him. Just a little. Roleplay be damned. “What can I do to make you change your mind, Nurse Cady?”
Fuck, this man makes me so hot.
“I don’t know. I’m not so easily swayed.”
His hand drops into the space between us, cupping my breast over my scrub top and squeezing the hell out of it until delicious tingles explode within me. His mouth meets my neck, delighting me with warm, wet, sensual kisses that make rational thought, let alone sexy banter, impossible.
