Signed, I'm Yours!: A supervillainous romcom, page 19
“It was a great day, wasn’t it, Paper Trail?” I turn to Kevin and he smirks, nodding.
“Sure was, boss.”
“You should have seen it, Rugrat. It was so cute and magical. I wore pink, of course. It’s my signature color. Lol. Get it? Signature?”
Rugrat shakes his head, grumbling.
“Anyway. It was a great day. You know, I never thought I’d get married. I don’t know. I was always kind of a loner. I guess I have Hana and Min to blame for that. They isolated me from the rest of the world and made me focus on providing for them. But I’m over that now. You know the FBI arrested them a couple of weeks ago? They got caught trying to cross the border to Canada. Idiots. Now, they get to pay for their crimes. And I got the last laugh. Thank God for the anonymous tip line. That did the trick.”
Kevin clears his throat.
“Right. I digress. As I was saying, it was a wonderful day. I mean, would it have been more wonderful at the Plaza? Sure. Yes. It would have been glorious, but my husband doesn’t like flashy things. And he wanted to avoid drawing any attention from our day. My signatures can expire quite randomly, and the last thing we wanted was to be interrupted mid-service and get kicked out.”
“I told you I could have taken care of that,” Kevin says.
“I know, Paper Trail. But you know Jack-Jack. He’s a goody-two-shoes.” I turn back to Rugrat, who’s glaring at me now. “So, yeah. I got married at city hall. Sue me. It was still fun. And we had the reception at my new apartment, the penthouse in Central Park Diamond, thank you very much. So yeah. My dreams are finally real.”
Rugrat huffs.
Kevin coughs again.
“Thank you, Paper Trail. I mean, all our dreams are becoming real. Lily got her job back and the school board members found themselves without jobs all of a sudden. I wonder how that happened.” I glance at Kevin, and we both snigger. “Zeke doesn’t need my help. He’s a big guy who can take care of himself. And so can Annie. Brandon decided to cry on camera, so now he’s a big TikToker that everyone tries to make laugh and feel good. And Robin? Robin has joined my criminal empire. They’re my intel person. Aren’t they?”
Kevin nods.
“They’re very good at unearthing information. They might not be able to use the internet to hack things, but give them a thread, and they can pull the heck out of it. Oh gosh, look at me. I’m saying heck now too. Did you know when you’re a couple, a married couple actually, you start copying each other. You become this mesh of both your personalities that you forget where one starts and the other ends? But I like it. It’s cute when Jack swears. Isn’t it?”
“It’s funny,” Kevin agrees.
“Oh, I almost forgot. Don’t tell Jack, but his exes have mysteriously found themselves in debt. I wonder how that happened.” I laugh and shush Rugrat. Kevin giggles too. “That should teach them for breaking my man’s heart.”
“If they hadn’t, you wouldn’t be married now,” Kevin says.
“Thank you, Paper Trail. You’re right. Anyway, what was I saying? Ah yes. I was saying my empire’s growing, and Robin discovered some very interesting things. About you.”
I point at Rugrat and twirl my pen in my hands as I approach the bound billionaire. He tries to lean away from me and call for help, but the handkerchief taped to his mouth isn’t helping.
“You forgot about me,” Kevin says.
“Oh shoot. I did. Well, Paper Trail here now owns this apartment, my old apartment, and he’s making money for a change. He’s got medical insurance, and he’s even found a doctor who thinks they can help him reverse the aging process. Did you know he’s barely thirty? I know, he doesn’t look it. Yet.”
“But I will.” Kevin peacocks a bit, and it’s so sweet to see him so happy.
“Damn right, you will. Now. Where were we, Rugrat?”
“Robin discovered—”
“That’s right. Little birdie Robin tells me you’re trafficking people now? Tut tut tut, you silly man. Didn’t anyone tell you that’s wrong?”
Rugrat tries to argue. He’s probably trying to call me a bitch or an asshole or any other rich expletive, but he can call me whatever he wants. I’ve still got the upper hand.
“So, since you’re not playing nice and ruining people’s lives, I think it’s only fair to give all your money away, shall we?”
Kevin’s eyes light up while he nods.
I take the tablet he gives me and sign the transfer authorization form from Rugrat’s bank. Then, I tug at the rope around Rugrat’s wrists and pull him free.
“Now be a good boy and give us all your money, Rugrat.” I show him my signature, and before he can even untape his mouth, he grabs my stylus and signs right where I point him to like the good sheep he is. “Well done. Now, don’t worry. I won’t keep your billions. They will, however, be donated to all the people you’ve trafficked. And a few charities in the countries you displaced those people from.”
Rugrat pulls the tape and handkerchief out of his mouth and throws it on the floor.
“Over my dead body.”
“Don’t worry, honey. It’s already done. Your contribution will end world hunger. You should be proud.”
“I’ll kill you.”
I scoff.
“You’ll do nothing of the sort. In fact…” I put the stylus away and grab my trusted Sharpie. “You will forget all about me and who did this, and you’ll eat humble pie for the rest of your life.” I grab his arm, sign it before he can retaliate, and let him go his merry way.
I doubt my signature will last his entire life, I’m still testing the limits of signing people, but at the very least, he’ll forget this interaction. By the time he comes to his senses, he’ll be booked and thrown into jail. And since he’s now penniless, he can forget about bail.
“Are you done, sweetheart? Dinner is getting cold.” Jack lets Rugrat get out of the apartment first before entering it himself, and I pass my pen to Kevin before I embrace my husband.
“I was just about to come.” I smirk.
“Were you?” he hums.
Kevin clears his throat.
“If you would be so kind as to not come in my apartment…that’d be great.”
Jack laughs and sneaks in a kiss before he lets me go.
“You know what to do, Kevin,” I say before my husband drags me upstairs.
Paper Trail and I have been planning this stunt for a while. Everything is perfectly coordinated and executed.
“How did it go?” he asks me when we get to the elevator. It’s only one floor up, but those stairs are a bitch, except for when I do my cardio.
“Very well. He’s broke and we just ended world hunger. Maybe if we target The Musk next, we can end world poverty?”
Jack smiles, rolling his eyes.
“There’s too much attention on The Musk. Maybe you can try the Zuck.”
I laugh because the same man who kept telling me I was no supervillain is now condoning my teetering on the criminal side.
Okay, not teetering. I’m a full-blown criminal. Or Robin Hood, as Jack likes to call me, which gets confusing. I prefer Seojun Hood. Or Seojun Lewis. It has a nice ring to it. And oh boy, do I have an actual ring to show for it.
And that’s why I love my husband. He never tried to change me. He never tried to put me on the straight and narrow. I found a path that works for me all on my own. And yes, I may only hurt the rich scums of this world, but that still makes me a supervillain. At least in my book. And for some reason, Jack doesn’t mind me robbing rich dicks who don’t deserve their money.
Maybe it’s his power. Maybe it’s Maybelline. Maybe it’s just me.
No. Definitely me.
This man couldn’t not support me. He would give me the world if he could. And he does every day that he chooses to love and cherish me for who I am.
And lucky him. I can actually give him the world on top of good kisses, great blowjobs, and mind-blowing orgasms.
I can give him everything.
One signature at a time.
Wait!
Don’t go just yet!
What about the post-epilogue epilogue?
You didn’t think this was the end, did you?
What kind of a superhero book would this be if it didn’t have a post-credit scene?
Follow the link below to read the post-epilogue epilogue now!
https://www.rhyswritesromance.com/sign-up/signed-im-yours
And if you want MORE SPAM and Subparheroes, check out the rest of the shared-world series on Amazon.
Subparheroes on Amazon
A LETTER FROM RHYS
Ah, this book.
It just came out of nowhere and it made life so much brighter. And bloody fun.
Okay, maybe I didn’t feel that way near the end of my deadline, but nonetheless I FUCKING LOVED writing this book from conception to the happily-ever-after.
And this book wouldn’t exist if Allison Temple hadn’t given me her book to beta-read (have you read My Not-So-Super Blind Date yet? If not, what are you waiting for?). In it there’s a big campy character in a big, pink fur coat and thus, Seojun was born. Sometimes, that’s all it takes. Imagining a character wreaking havoc in very fashionable clothes.
So huge thanks to Elle Keaton for organizing this world. And for letting me back in. Can you believe I almost didn’t participate because of how behind I was due to my surgery AND because I didn’t have a plot bunny? So much can change with just a little stroke of inspiration.
I don’t think I’ve written anything as irreverent. It was amazing. I loved that the stakes were high but not off-the-roof and the characters didn’t take themselves, or life, too seriously.
So yeah. If given the chance, I’ll definitely be returning into this world. And if not, then Signed, I’m Yours! and Seojun and Jack-Jack will have a special place in my heart that will always crack me up.
I hope you genuinely enjoyed this story, and if not, don’t worry. I know it’s a bit much at times. I’m calling it my marmite story because in my head you either love it or you downright hate it.
Don’t forget to read the post-epilogue epilogue, because like a good superhero movie it’s got to have a tease for the future.
Catch you in the next adventure.
x Rhys Lawless,
August 2024
ALSO BY RHYS
For the most up-to-date list, visit rhyswritesromance.com/books
Demon Gods
(ongoing series)
Loki and his Master
Hades and his Witch
Sett and his King
Cursed Hearts
(complete series)
Killer Heart, Book 1
Demon Heart, Book 2
Vampire Heart, Book 3
Cursed Hearts Companion Novellas:
The short stories can be read as standalone, but if you’d like to read them as part of the series, follow the numbering.
Cursed Mate, Book 0.5 (Free)
Cursed Dance, Book 3.5
Cursed Night, Book 3.6
Star-Crossed
(complete series)
Elven Duty, Book 1
Elven Game, Book 2
Elven Heir, Book 3
Subparheroes Series
Signed, I’m Yours! (Standalone)
Mayberry Protectors
Forever Asher
Navy SEALs, small town, best friends to lovers, bi-awakening, romantic suspense.
Mother Parker
Navy SEALs, small town, grumpy/sunshine, big/small, romantic suspense.
Bad Joey
Navy SEALs, small town, bad boy, insta-love, big/small, romantic suspense.
Clean Slade
Navy SEALs, small town, mafia, single dad, bodyguard, big/small, romantic suspense.
Cedarwood Beach
(complete series)
A small town/family saga series.
A Proper Education
(complete series)
Teacher/student, high steam, low angst series.
Standalones
Hair and Heart (A Rapunzel Retelling)
Davey’s Christmas Miracle
The Holiday Experiment
New Adult Romances
Street Love
The Greek Word for Love
Free Books
My Fake Billionaire
AUDIOBOOKS
My books are coming in audio. For an up-to-date list visit my website at rhyswritesromance.com/audio
Rhys Lawless
Killer romance. One spell at a time.
Demon Gods:
Narrated by John York
Loki and his Master
Hades and his Witch
Cursed Hearts Series:
Narrated by John York
Killer Heart, Book 1
Demon Heart, Book 2
Vampire Heart, Book 3
Star-Crossed Series
Narrated by John York
Elven Duty, Book 1
Elven Game, Book 2
Elven Heir, Book 3
Rhys Everly
Sexy romance with all the feels
A Proper Education Series
Narrated by John York
Teach for Treat
Beau Pair
Me Three
Your Only Fan
Missing Linc
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Rhys Everly-Lawless is a hopeless romantic who loves happily-ever-afters.
Which would explain why he loves writing them.
When he's not passionately typing out his next book, you can find him cuddling his dog, feeding his husband, or taking long walks letting those plot bunnies breed ferociously in his head.
He writes contemporary gay romances as Rhys Everly and LGBTQ+ urban fantasy and paranormal romances as Rhys Lawless.
You can find out more about him and his works-in-progress by joining his Facebook group or visiting his website rhyswritesromance.com
Rhys Lawless, Signed, I'm Yours!: A supervillainous romcom
