Somebody's Someone, page 12
“Hey, Miss Virginia.” She looked up at me. “What was those things we paid for our food with?” I was desperate to know.
“Oh, those! They are what the military gives people who are
traveling so they can eat.” She went on to say that’s one of the many ways that “Uncle Sam” took care of the folks that worked for him. I didn’t know who her uncle was, but all I can say is he sho’ was nice to her, and I wished I had an uncle like that.
We sat in quiet and ate our chicken dinner. It was real good—but not as good as back home. After eating all I could, Miss Virginia took the rest of my food and hers and wrapped it in a napkin b’fore putting it in a bag. She told me to keep it for the next time I got hungry. Lord have mercy! How did she know to go and do that? Whoever was telling her what to do for me was sure doing a good job.
When our meal was done, we made our way back to our bus. I thanked Miss Virginia till I plumb ran outta words to say. She simply told me to thank her uncle and not to mention it again.
There was just some things in life that I just didn’t have a notion for understandin’. What made this lady wanna help out a li’l girl that she didn’t even know? Why come Private Reed wanted to buy me food and make sho’ that I’d be all right? Or like how was rainbows really made? Did somebody in heaven have a overhead projector like the schoolteachers and shined it down whenever they wanted to make folks stop what they was doing, look up, and smile at God, as a way for us not to forget ’bout him? I tell you what makes sense to me: I believe that them same folks who was shining down them there rainbows took count of the times that Miss Virginia had looked up and smiled at God. And for that they smiled back on her, by giving her a uncle to watch out for her, and in return, she watched out for li’l girls like me. Maybe one day I could pass the favor along and do the same thing as Miss Virginia did for some other li’l girl.
The next day I lifted my head from sleep and searched the aisles for Private Reed. I didn’t see her, and figured that she had gotten off during the night. I was sad that she left, but as I put my sweater on, I found a note stuck to my vanity case. That sho’ was smart, ’cause my case doubles as a pillow and no one could take it without me feeling it move. I opened the envelope and read,
Dear honey girl,
I don’t know where you’re from or where you’re going. But from the look of things, you sure need somebody tolook after you. Now, I know that God has a plan for you, so I will pray that you find your way. Here is two dollars. Use it to get something to eat or drink.
Your Friend,
Pvt. Virginia Reed, USMC
I folded the note and put it back in the envelope, then placed it in my vanity case so that I wouldn’t lose it. I looked out the window and smiled a thank-you into the air. I hoped that one day that smile might find her.
CHAPTER SIX
I’VE SEEN HER
WE PULLED INTO the Greyhound/Trailways bus station that was situated at the corner of Court and Chaney. I liked to watch for street signs, so I seen ’em right off. ’Cross the way from the station was somewhere called Sammy’s Pool Room. I wondered how they got a pool in such a small place. I figured maybe it was one of them wading pools, for babies. Other than the “pool room” and the Southern Cleaners building, Jacksonville, North Carolina, looked like any other small town we had rode through. The only difference being, I had come to the end of my ride. Ever since we left Texas, I’d been keeping track, and as of this minute we had been driving for three days. I sat back quietly as the driver announced that we had reached the last stop. As he tilted the big mirror that let him look to the back of the bus, he caught my eyes and said, “This be yo’ stop, young lady.”
I watched as everybody else got up to take they bags from the overhead racks. It was then that I realized that I didn’t have any other bags ’cept the vinyl case. It suddenly became clear to me that Big Mama was gonna be waiting on me to get back. Any person with common sense knew that nobody went traveling without clothes, unless they was just leaving for a short while. I wondered how long I was gonna be staying. I sat awhile, r’membering Big Mama’s words, and wondered if I would have to use that quarter in case nobody came. I still had the two dollars Private Reed had gave me, so maybe if no one came, I could buy a ticket back home to Texas. I sat and waited and worked hard at not being scared. I pulled out my note and read it again as the folks fumbled with they bags and made they way off the bus. “I know that God has a plan for you.” I reread them words a few more times, and finally, when the last person had left, I stood with my note and case in hand and made my way to the front of the greyhound-dog bus.
I moved slowly, wanting to give whoever was coming to get me all the time in the world to make up they mind to whether they still wanted to come. Finally, the driver stuck his big head in the door and asked me to come on. At the door, the large man offered his hand to me. I thought that mighty nice of him, considering I had only seen that done for Big Mama and I wasn’t even close to half her age. I grabbed the hand and took each step with a smile.
I’d already heard the driver tell everyone to watch they step, so I took it upon myself to be mindful. Once on the platform, I felt like my body was moving in many different directions at one time. I was getting dizzy, so I walked to the nearest bench and took a seat. I looked round and saw no one, and my chest started swelling with air. I closed my teeth down hard and let my nose get wide as I let the air outta my chest. I felt the tears lining up, waiting to tell my tale.
“I cain’t cry,” I kept telling myself over and over. No matter what! I didn’t want whoever was coming to think me a sissy if they was to find me here boohooing. I sat for a while longer gripping the paper note. After what seemed like forever, and all the others had left the station, I watched as a worker motioned a woman in my direction. With her hand, she swept the air as if something was in her way. The lady headed for me, talking loud and waving her hand.
“Well. Well. Well. Would you look a here! This gots to be my chile!” Then she busted out hootin’ and hollerin’ about how this was such a surprise. I laughed right along with her. Everything inside me lit up all at the same time. My heart, stomach, and even the spit in my mouth all seemed to want to get in on what was happening. Before me stood a redbone woman in a hairdo that was no smaller than a tiny mountain. Folks in the South called light-skinned women with good hair “redbone.” I guess that meant they was different from being just plain black. I didn’t see no difference, ’cept her hair was pulled back so tight her eyes was slanted up, making her look like the Chinese. I think she was wearing them fake eyelashes, the kind that Sister wore when she played dress-up, ’cause hers was mighty long, unnaturally so. The woman wore dungarees with silver dots running along the seams and a coat to match. Out of the corner of her mouth hung a white cigarette with no brown filter, like Daddy Lent’s Tiparillos. As she talked, the cigarette moved right along with her.
“Come on over here, girl, and gimme some sugar,” she yelled. B’fore I could move, her arms was round me and off again, just that fast. Stepping back, I let whatever wanted to slip out my mouth slip on out.
“Ruby, is that you?” My insides beat loudly, not knowing what else to say.
“Who the hell else you think it is? Girl, you talking stupid! Of course it’s me! I am yo’ mama, chile.”
The tobacco stick must’ve been stuck in her lipstick ’cause even though her mouth opened, it didn’t fall out. I kept right on staring, amazed that she could balance such a skinny stick on one lip without losing it. I could sense her voice change a bit after I asked her if she was who I thought she was. The minute I said it, I knew it was the wrong question to ask. Something in me became tight. I felt like I had been hit without being touched.
“Ruby!” I cried out again, tryin’ to show her I was glad to see that it was her. I swung my arms round her neck and tried to kiss her on the mouth, like I’d seen Aint Bobbie do with her babies, but Ruby turned her cheek to me.
“Ooooh-wee, girl, we gotta get you to a store to buy a toothbrush, ’cause yo’ breath sho’ do stank.” This time her voice was lighter, and she laughed. I laughed back, seeing that she felt better after saying that. Right then she seemed real happy to see me. As we turned to leave she asked me, “Where’s yo’ bags?” At the same time, she looked round the bench I had been sitting on.
“I didn’t brang none.”
Ruby rolled her eyes and took what was left of the tobacco stick outta her mouth and dropped it at her feet. Then, with the point of her shoe, she smashed the red-hot tip until all that was left was pieces of smoke and ashes.
“I cain’t believe that the ole dog sent you clear ’cross the country without no goddamned clothes. What the fuck was she thinking?”
“I dunno,” I answered, as I lifted my shoulders in wonder, not sure if she was asking me or just talking out loud. “Maybe she thought I was coming back soon and wouldn’t need any,” I offered, watching Ruby the whole time. I wanted to see what she was gonna do.
“Fuck that shit!” she yelled. “I know that damn Thornhill! She thinks she’s slick. Johnnie Jean was gonna make sure you took nothing you didn’t pay for. The way she sees it, your clothes can be used to cover somebody else’s tail.” I watched with my mouth hung open as Ruby went into a spin about Big Mama and her no-good ways. “She ain’t shit!” Ruby’s eyes grew dark and hard as she tried to light another tobacco stick. At first she tried striking the wooden matchstick on a piece of striker that she had to have torn off the original box. When that failed her, she cocked that cigarette between her lips and with the flick of her wrist, ignited that fire on the concrete floor beneath our very feet! Damn, I ain’t ever seen somebody want something so bad. But the good thing ’bout it was, she stopped cussing Big Mama.
“Don’t you ever let me catch you doing this! I don’t ever wanna see you smoking, you hear me?” Ruby told me as she grabbed my arm and pulled me in the direction she wanted to go and didn’t bother on waitin’ for me to answer her back. “Come on, girl, let’s get you a toothbrush.” I followed behind Ruby as she made our way to a car that seemed to be waiting for us. A man was in the driver’s seat, and from what I could see he was bumpin’ his head and thumbs on the steering wheel to the beat of something, maybe music I couldn’t quite hear for all the noise that was round us. As we got closer I could hear the last of, Diamond in the back, sunroof top, diggin’ the scene . . .
“Get in the back,” Ruby told me as she pulled her front seat forward and let me crawl into the backseat.
“Let’s go to the Winn-Dixie so I can pick up some dinner and this child can get a toothbrush.” The driver, a man blacker than the ace of spades, said not a word, but drove off like he was told. I guessed it was just like the grown folks said: Ruby sho’ did have a way with folks.
I snuck a look at Ruby smoking up a storm in that front seat. I couldn’t believe she was right there in front of me—I needed somebody to pinch my hind parts to remind me I wasn’t dreaming no more. I was here with my mama. And she was real. I stared at her, takin’ in as much of what she looked like as I could. A few times she caught me and told me I needed to cut the staring shit out. My heart would be a li’l bit hurt ’cause she cussed at me, but I figured she didn’t know no betta’ since she wasn’t used to me yet. I’d give her some time.
Outta all the things I liked best ’bout her looks, her mouth was my favorite. It was wider than mine and looked softer too. Her hair was also better than mine. Hers curled in little q’s, soft and quiet-like, and laid at the side of her face. Mine was so tight it had a snap-back-fast way ’bout it. And when you pulled on it with a pick, it sounded like sparklers going off on the Fourth of July. But for all the soft prettiness my mama had, her tongue was fouler than a outhouse on its shittiest day. All my life I’d heard folks say some of the nastiest words that no child should have to hear, but my mama had to be the worst yet. I could see why come Lula Mae and them folks back home used cussing, on account I wasn’t they real kin, and they didn’t have to care ’bout me if they didn’t wanna. But for Ruby to be saying the stuff she was saying round me took me by surprise. I figured that she’d wanna be nicer since she hadn’t seen me in a while, but I didn’t think she thought on it like that. In some way, I guess she was more like the folks back home than she wasn’t, and I didn’t mind as long as she didn’t start putting me down and hittin’ on me.
That first day, the man dropped us off at our house and left without a word to me and just a big kiss from Ruby. I looked round at the house where me, Ruby, and her two boys was gonna live. It was a street where all the houses looked mostly the same. Each house sat in the middle of a plot of grass. The back of the houses on our side of the road had a li’l creek crawling through it that was loaded with crawdaddies, bloodsuckers, and lots of other nasty stuff that I didn’t concern myself with. The front yard had a porch that was attached to the house. And on the side of the house was a carport where Ruby parked her tan-colored Corvair. Sometimes a burgundy Eldorado with a beige roof was parked there too. Ruby told me it belonged to her man, Mr. Benny.
On both sides of our house we had neighbors. On the left side lived Nichelle Neil, her two sisters Carol and Deedee, and their odd brother little Ed—who I later found out was known for picking up cigarette butts and trying to smoke ’em. They had both a mother and a father, and a dog and a station wagon. I ain’t never seen no black folks with dogs. The whole of they family was quiet and hardly ever talked, not unless you forced ’em, that is. After a while, and a lot of forcing, Nichelle came to be my friend. Directly to my right was Miss Ida Mason. Man, was she a big woman! She reminded me of a man. Miss Ida had a reputation for winding up a chicken by the neck until she heard it snap, then lettin’ it go to run round the yard till it keeled over. I thought only mens did that. If it wasn’t for the fact that she walked round half the day with hand-torn pieces of brown paper bags used for hair rollers like only women do, I wouldn’t have knowned elsewise.
“Hey, Benny, you r’member Regina don’t cha, my youngest girl?”
I had been with Ruby ’bout a week, and I hadn’t seen Mr. Benny since he’d picked me up with Ruby from the bus station. Now he was here in our house, actin’ like he lived with us or something. Why else would he be in my mama’s house, touching our things like they belonged to him? He didn’t seem to wanna move when Ruby first talked to him. He kept right on messing with the stereo and things. I wondered why Ruby was just now telling the man my name? I figured that was part of her own way of doing things.
Benny, the man Ruby was talking at, seemed like he had no mind to be bothered. After taking the stereo arm, and placing it halfway in the middle of a album, he finally looked up and nodded his head. “Hey now, how’s it going? Ya settled in yet?” he asked as the speakers let go of one of my favorite songs.
I answered “Fine” to the first question and let the second one go on by. I wasn’t real used to being round mens that wanted to talk to me and ask questions. I instead listened to “Sideshow” by Blue Magic rolling off the speakers.
Ruby moved past the man and went to her room, and I followed behind, going to mine. I could hear the Blue Magic singing from where I was. This was the first time in my life that I had my own room. I should’ve been happy, but I was scared ’cause my sister wasn’t with me. From the time I could r’member my name, me and Sister had shared the same room, bed, and sometimes panties (the panty part only lasted till she got the bloods). My new room wasn’t nothin’ too fancy; it had a small bed, a nice window, and a real closet to put your stuff in. It was a nice place to “hang your head at the end of the day.” That’s what Daddy Lent used to say made somewhere home. I r’membered back on him more than you’d think. In b’tween the happiness to see my mama and still being buck-wild mad at Big Mama for leavin’ me on that bus, I was still kinda missing south Austin and all of them. Out at Big Mama’s the room Sister and me had to share was way smaller than my new one. There, we had a bed that had a ticking-striped mattress full of piss stains and springs that came out at night and bit you while you was sleepin’. There was also this big ole raggedy fan that was always stuck in the window—rain, sleet, or snow (one time it did snow). In the bottom of the fan is where we’d put a rat trap stuffed with gov’ment-issued cheese to catch the rats when they was tryin’ to get in through the fan from the out of doors. Most times the smell of something dead would get us faster than we’d realize the trap got the rat. Other than the bed or the fan, there was also a ole wardrobe and a Chester bureau in our room. Sister told me that the Chester bureau is where they buried Chester, a neighbor, and the wardrobe was where his clothes was hid. I lost many nights’ sleep worrying ’bout Chester coming back for his stuff. So I never went near his belongings for fear of what he might do to me.
Even though I was a li’l homesick for south Austin, my friend Theresa, and the way I could run free and wild, I knowed that I never wanted to live like them folks again. The way they sometimes treated folks out there was nothing short of being the devil’s kin. And getting ready to meet Ruby’s boys, I was reminded of how bad them folks could be to kids who didn’t know betta’ or have somebody to watch out for ’em. It happened years back when Ruby’s two boys came to live with me and Sister out at Big Mama’s.
If the truth was to be told, I was real doggone nervous when I set eyes on Ruby’s two boys, ’cause it had been a long time since I was round boys who was s’posed to be related to me. The eldest, Dwayne Edward, was ’bout seven. His genius was discovered a few years back by a man while riding a Trailways bus ’cross the country. The story goes that Dwayne Edward started reading every billboard sign between Tallahassee and Beaumont. Nobody even knowed he could talk, let alone read. Seeing that Dwayne was only two or three or so, the man gave him the beginning of the Preamble of the Constitution to read, and Dwayne Edward looked at it one time and read the whole thing back to the stranger. Right then and there, Dwayne was offered a appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show, but had to turn it down on account he was still a baby. Then there was the younger boy, Dennis Roy, who was round five. Everybody figured his genius might be the fact that he was gonna be as huge as his daddy, Big Lawrence, and maybe he’d turn out to be a famous football player. But no one knew ’bout they genius parts when they came to stay at the Thornhills’.
“Oh, those! They are what the military gives people who are
traveling so they can eat.” She went on to say that’s one of the many ways that “Uncle Sam” took care of the folks that worked for him. I didn’t know who her uncle was, but all I can say is he sho’ was nice to her, and I wished I had an uncle like that.
We sat in quiet and ate our chicken dinner. It was real good—but not as good as back home. After eating all I could, Miss Virginia took the rest of my food and hers and wrapped it in a napkin b’fore putting it in a bag. She told me to keep it for the next time I got hungry. Lord have mercy! How did she know to go and do that? Whoever was telling her what to do for me was sure doing a good job.
When our meal was done, we made our way back to our bus. I thanked Miss Virginia till I plumb ran outta words to say. She simply told me to thank her uncle and not to mention it again.
There was just some things in life that I just didn’t have a notion for understandin’. What made this lady wanna help out a li’l girl that she didn’t even know? Why come Private Reed wanted to buy me food and make sho’ that I’d be all right? Or like how was rainbows really made? Did somebody in heaven have a overhead projector like the schoolteachers and shined it down whenever they wanted to make folks stop what they was doing, look up, and smile at God, as a way for us not to forget ’bout him? I tell you what makes sense to me: I believe that them same folks who was shining down them there rainbows took count of the times that Miss Virginia had looked up and smiled at God. And for that they smiled back on her, by giving her a uncle to watch out for her, and in return, she watched out for li’l girls like me. Maybe one day I could pass the favor along and do the same thing as Miss Virginia did for some other li’l girl.
The next day I lifted my head from sleep and searched the aisles for Private Reed. I didn’t see her, and figured that she had gotten off during the night. I was sad that she left, but as I put my sweater on, I found a note stuck to my vanity case. That sho’ was smart, ’cause my case doubles as a pillow and no one could take it without me feeling it move. I opened the envelope and read,
Dear honey girl,
I don’t know where you’re from or where you’re going. But from the look of things, you sure need somebody tolook after you. Now, I know that God has a plan for you, so I will pray that you find your way. Here is two dollars. Use it to get something to eat or drink.
Your Friend,
Pvt. Virginia Reed, USMC
I folded the note and put it back in the envelope, then placed it in my vanity case so that I wouldn’t lose it. I looked out the window and smiled a thank-you into the air. I hoped that one day that smile might find her.
CHAPTER SIX
I’VE SEEN HER
WE PULLED INTO the Greyhound/Trailways bus station that was situated at the corner of Court and Chaney. I liked to watch for street signs, so I seen ’em right off. ’Cross the way from the station was somewhere called Sammy’s Pool Room. I wondered how they got a pool in such a small place. I figured maybe it was one of them wading pools, for babies. Other than the “pool room” and the Southern Cleaners building, Jacksonville, North Carolina, looked like any other small town we had rode through. The only difference being, I had come to the end of my ride. Ever since we left Texas, I’d been keeping track, and as of this minute we had been driving for three days. I sat back quietly as the driver announced that we had reached the last stop. As he tilted the big mirror that let him look to the back of the bus, he caught my eyes and said, “This be yo’ stop, young lady.”
I watched as everybody else got up to take they bags from the overhead racks. It was then that I realized that I didn’t have any other bags ’cept the vinyl case. It suddenly became clear to me that Big Mama was gonna be waiting on me to get back. Any person with common sense knew that nobody went traveling without clothes, unless they was just leaving for a short while. I wondered how long I was gonna be staying. I sat awhile, r’membering Big Mama’s words, and wondered if I would have to use that quarter in case nobody came. I still had the two dollars Private Reed had gave me, so maybe if no one came, I could buy a ticket back home to Texas. I sat and waited and worked hard at not being scared. I pulled out my note and read it again as the folks fumbled with they bags and made they way off the bus. “I know that God has a plan for you.” I reread them words a few more times, and finally, when the last person had left, I stood with my note and case in hand and made my way to the front of the greyhound-dog bus.
I moved slowly, wanting to give whoever was coming to get me all the time in the world to make up they mind to whether they still wanted to come. Finally, the driver stuck his big head in the door and asked me to come on. At the door, the large man offered his hand to me. I thought that mighty nice of him, considering I had only seen that done for Big Mama and I wasn’t even close to half her age. I grabbed the hand and took each step with a smile.
I’d already heard the driver tell everyone to watch they step, so I took it upon myself to be mindful. Once on the platform, I felt like my body was moving in many different directions at one time. I was getting dizzy, so I walked to the nearest bench and took a seat. I looked round and saw no one, and my chest started swelling with air. I closed my teeth down hard and let my nose get wide as I let the air outta my chest. I felt the tears lining up, waiting to tell my tale.
“I cain’t cry,” I kept telling myself over and over. No matter what! I didn’t want whoever was coming to think me a sissy if they was to find me here boohooing. I sat for a while longer gripping the paper note. After what seemed like forever, and all the others had left the station, I watched as a worker motioned a woman in my direction. With her hand, she swept the air as if something was in her way. The lady headed for me, talking loud and waving her hand.
“Well. Well. Well. Would you look a here! This gots to be my chile!” Then she busted out hootin’ and hollerin’ about how this was such a surprise. I laughed right along with her. Everything inside me lit up all at the same time. My heart, stomach, and even the spit in my mouth all seemed to want to get in on what was happening. Before me stood a redbone woman in a hairdo that was no smaller than a tiny mountain. Folks in the South called light-skinned women with good hair “redbone.” I guess that meant they was different from being just plain black. I didn’t see no difference, ’cept her hair was pulled back so tight her eyes was slanted up, making her look like the Chinese. I think she was wearing them fake eyelashes, the kind that Sister wore when she played dress-up, ’cause hers was mighty long, unnaturally so. The woman wore dungarees with silver dots running along the seams and a coat to match. Out of the corner of her mouth hung a white cigarette with no brown filter, like Daddy Lent’s Tiparillos. As she talked, the cigarette moved right along with her.
“Come on over here, girl, and gimme some sugar,” she yelled. B’fore I could move, her arms was round me and off again, just that fast. Stepping back, I let whatever wanted to slip out my mouth slip on out.
“Ruby, is that you?” My insides beat loudly, not knowing what else to say.
“Who the hell else you think it is? Girl, you talking stupid! Of course it’s me! I am yo’ mama, chile.”
The tobacco stick must’ve been stuck in her lipstick ’cause even though her mouth opened, it didn’t fall out. I kept right on staring, amazed that she could balance such a skinny stick on one lip without losing it. I could sense her voice change a bit after I asked her if she was who I thought she was. The minute I said it, I knew it was the wrong question to ask. Something in me became tight. I felt like I had been hit without being touched.
“Ruby!” I cried out again, tryin’ to show her I was glad to see that it was her. I swung my arms round her neck and tried to kiss her on the mouth, like I’d seen Aint Bobbie do with her babies, but Ruby turned her cheek to me.
“Ooooh-wee, girl, we gotta get you to a store to buy a toothbrush, ’cause yo’ breath sho’ do stank.” This time her voice was lighter, and she laughed. I laughed back, seeing that she felt better after saying that. Right then she seemed real happy to see me. As we turned to leave she asked me, “Where’s yo’ bags?” At the same time, she looked round the bench I had been sitting on.
“I didn’t brang none.”
Ruby rolled her eyes and took what was left of the tobacco stick outta her mouth and dropped it at her feet. Then, with the point of her shoe, she smashed the red-hot tip until all that was left was pieces of smoke and ashes.
“I cain’t believe that the ole dog sent you clear ’cross the country without no goddamned clothes. What the fuck was she thinking?”
“I dunno,” I answered, as I lifted my shoulders in wonder, not sure if she was asking me or just talking out loud. “Maybe she thought I was coming back soon and wouldn’t need any,” I offered, watching Ruby the whole time. I wanted to see what she was gonna do.
“Fuck that shit!” she yelled. “I know that damn Thornhill! She thinks she’s slick. Johnnie Jean was gonna make sure you took nothing you didn’t pay for. The way she sees it, your clothes can be used to cover somebody else’s tail.” I watched with my mouth hung open as Ruby went into a spin about Big Mama and her no-good ways. “She ain’t shit!” Ruby’s eyes grew dark and hard as she tried to light another tobacco stick. At first she tried striking the wooden matchstick on a piece of striker that she had to have torn off the original box. When that failed her, she cocked that cigarette between her lips and with the flick of her wrist, ignited that fire on the concrete floor beneath our very feet! Damn, I ain’t ever seen somebody want something so bad. But the good thing ’bout it was, she stopped cussing Big Mama.
“Don’t you ever let me catch you doing this! I don’t ever wanna see you smoking, you hear me?” Ruby told me as she grabbed my arm and pulled me in the direction she wanted to go and didn’t bother on waitin’ for me to answer her back. “Come on, girl, let’s get you a toothbrush.” I followed behind Ruby as she made our way to a car that seemed to be waiting for us. A man was in the driver’s seat, and from what I could see he was bumpin’ his head and thumbs on the steering wheel to the beat of something, maybe music I couldn’t quite hear for all the noise that was round us. As we got closer I could hear the last of, Diamond in the back, sunroof top, diggin’ the scene . . .
“Get in the back,” Ruby told me as she pulled her front seat forward and let me crawl into the backseat.
“Let’s go to the Winn-Dixie so I can pick up some dinner and this child can get a toothbrush.” The driver, a man blacker than the ace of spades, said not a word, but drove off like he was told. I guessed it was just like the grown folks said: Ruby sho’ did have a way with folks.
I snuck a look at Ruby smoking up a storm in that front seat. I couldn’t believe she was right there in front of me—I needed somebody to pinch my hind parts to remind me I wasn’t dreaming no more. I was here with my mama. And she was real. I stared at her, takin’ in as much of what she looked like as I could. A few times she caught me and told me I needed to cut the staring shit out. My heart would be a li’l bit hurt ’cause she cussed at me, but I figured she didn’t know no betta’ since she wasn’t used to me yet. I’d give her some time.
Outta all the things I liked best ’bout her looks, her mouth was my favorite. It was wider than mine and looked softer too. Her hair was also better than mine. Hers curled in little q’s, soft and quiet-like, and laid at the side of her face. Mine was so tight it had a snap-back-fast way ’bout it. And when you pulled on it with a pick, it sounded like sparklers going off on the Fourth of July. But for all the soft prettiness my mama had, her tongue was fouler than a outhouse on its shittiest day. All my life I’d heard folks say some of the nastiest words that no child should have to hear, but my mama had to be the worst yet. I could see why come Lula Mae and them folks back home used cussing, on account I wasn’t they real kin, and they didn’t have to care ’bout me if they didn’t wanna. But for Ruby to be saying the stuff she was saying round me took me by surprise. I figured that she’d wanna be nicer since she hadn’t seen me in a while, but I didn’t think she thought on it like that. In some way, I guess she was more like the folks back home than she wasn’t, and I didn’t mind as long as she didn’t start putting me down and hittin’ on me.
That first day, the man dropped us off at our house and left without a word to me and just a big kiss from Ruby. I looked round at the house where me, Ruby, and her two boys was gonna live. It was a street where all the houses looked mostly the same. Each house sat in the middle of a plot of grass. The back of the houses on our side of the road had a li’l creek crawling through it that was loaded with crawdaddies, bloodsuckers, and lots of other nasty stuff that I didn’t concern myself with. The front yard had a porch that was attached to the house. And on the side of the house was a carport where Ruby parked her tan-colored Corvair. Sometimes a burgundy Eldorado with a beige roof was parked there too. Ruby told me it belonged to her man, Mr. Benny.
On both sides of our house we had neighbors. On the left side lived Nichelle Neil, her two sisters Carol and Deedee, and their odd brother little Ed—who I later found out was known for picking up cigarette butts and trying to smoke ’em. They had both a mother and a father, and a dog and a station wagon. I ain’t never seen no black folks with dogs. The whole of they family was quiet and hardly ever talked, not unless you forced ’em, that is. After a while, and a lot of forcing, Nichelle came to be my friend. Directly to my right was Miss Ida Mason. Man, was she a big woman! She reminded me of a man. Miss Ida had a reputation for winding up a chicken by the neck until she heard it snap, then lettin’ it go to run round the yard till it keeled over. I thought only mens did that. If it wasn’t for the fact that she walked round half the day with hand-torn pieces of brown paper bags used for hair rollers like only women do, I wouldn’t have knowned elsewise.
“Hey, Benny, you r’member Regina don’t cha, my youngest girl?”
I had been with Ruby ’bout a week, and I hadn’t seen Mr. Benny since he’d picked me up with Ruby from the bus station. Now he was here in our house, actin’ like he lived with us or something. Why else would he be in my mama’s house, touching our things like they belonged to him? He didn’t seem to wanna move when Ruby first talked to him. He kept right on messing with the stereo and things. I wondered why Ruby was just now telling the man my name? I figured that was part of her own way of doing things.
Benny, the man Ruby was talking at, seemed like he had no mind to be bothered. After taking the stereo arm, and placing it halfway in the middle of a album, he finally looked up and nodded his head. “Hey now, how’s it going? Ya settled in yet?” he asked as the speakers let go of one of my favorite songs.
I answered “Fine” to the first question and let the second one go on by. I wasn’t real used to being round mens that wanted to talk to me and ask questions. I instead listened to “Sideshow” by Blue Magic rolling off the speakers.
Ruby moved past the man and went to her room, and I followed behind, going to mine. I could hear the Blue Magic singing from where I was. This was the first time in my life that I had my own room. I should’ve been happy, but I was scared ’cause my sister wasn’t with me. From the time I could r’member my name, me and Sister had shared the same room, bed, and sometimes panties (the panty part only lasted till she got the bloods). My new room wasn’t nothin’ too fancy; it had a small bed, a nice window, and a real closet to put your stuff in. It was a nice place to “hang your head at the end of the day.” That’s what Daddy Lent used to say made somewhere home. I r’membered back on him more than you’d think. In b’tween the happiness to see my mama and still being buck-wild mad at Big Mama for leavin’ me on that bus, I was still kinda missing south Austin and all of them. Out at Big Mama’s the room Sister and me had to share was way smaller than my new one. There, we had a bed that had a ticking-striped mattress full of piss stains and springs that came out at night and bit you while you was sleepin’. There was also this big ole raggedy fan that was always stuck in the window—rain, sleet, or snow (one time it did snow). In the bottom of the fan is where we’d put a rat trap stuffed with gov’ment-issued cheese to catch the rats when they was tryin’ to get in through the fan from the out of doors. Most times the smell of something dead would get us faster than we’d realize the trap got the rat. Other than the bed or the fan, there was also a ole wardrobe and a Chester bureau in our room. Sister told me that the Chester bureau is where they buried Chester, a neighbor, and the wardrobe was where his clothes was hid. I lost many nights’ sleep worrying ’bout Chester coming back for his stuff. So I never went near his belongings for fear of what he might do to me.
Even though I was a li’l homesick for south Austin, my friend Theresa, and the way I could run free and wild, I knowed that I never wanted to live like them folks again. The way they sometimes treated folks out there was nothing short of being the devil’s kin. And getting ready to meet Ruby’s boys, I was reminded of how bad them folks could be to kids who didn’t know betta’ or have somebody to watch out for ’em. It happened years back when Ruby’s two boys came to live with me and Sister out at Big Mama’s.
If the truth was to be told, I was real doggone nervous when I set eyes on Ruby’s two boys, ’cause it had been a long time since I was round boys who was s’posed to be related to me. The eldest, Dwayne Edward, was ’bout seven. His genius was discovered a few years back by a man while riding a Trailways bus ’cross the country. The story goes that Dwayne Edward started reading every billboard sign between Tallahassee and Beaumont. Nobody even knowed he could talk, let alone read. Seeing that Dwayne was only two or three or so, the man gave him the beginning of the Preamble of the Constitution to read, and Dwayne Edward looked at it one time and read the whole thing back to the stranger. Right then and there, Dwayne was offered a appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show, but had to turn it down on account he was still a baby. Then there was the younger boy, Dennis Roy, who was round five. Everybody figured his genius might be the fact that he was gonna be as huge as his daddy, Big Lawrence, and maybe he’d turn out to be a famous football player. But no one knew ’bout they genius parts when they came to stay at the Thornhills’.
