Not Another Manwhore (Not Another Romance), page 1
Not Another Manwhore
Not Another Romance Novel
R.L. Kenderson
Not Another Manwhore
Copyright © 2021 by R.L. Kenderson
All Rights Reserved
ISBN-13: 978-1-950918-36-2
Editor: Jovana Shirley, Unforeseen Editing, www.unforeseenediting.com
Cover image:
Photographer: Reggie Deanching, R+M Photography,
www.rplusmphoto.com
Model: Marcel Pospiech
Designer: R.L. Kenderson at R.L. Cover Designs, www.rlcoverdesigns.com
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Epilogue
Also by R.L. Kenderson
About the Author
Not Another Manwhore
When her family pressures her to bring someone to her cousin’s wedding, he challenges her promise to swear off men forever.
As an only child, my mother wants me to get married…like, yesterday. But after my last two boyfriends cheated on me, I am done with dating, done with men, and done with romance. But I’d have better luck convincing my mom that the sky is green than getting her to understand I’m happy, being single.
Left with no other choice, I ask the biggest manwhore I know to be my date for a wedding weekend. He has just enough charm to make my family fall in love with him but not enough that I will. Too bad the bottom half of me doesn’t get the message.
But even if he gets my legs to open for him, he’ll never get my heart to do the same.
Chapter One
Bree
I curled my lip in disgust as the man across the restaurant got down on one knee and proposed to his girlfriend.
“What’s up with Bree?” Alexis asked the rest of our friends sitting around the table as she caught me staring.
I discreetly pointed to the couple, and my friends all turned to look.
“Don’t be so obvious,” I hissed.
Pru looked over her shoulder at me. “The dude is proposing in a restaurant. He wants everyone to look.”
I scanned the room. Sure enough, we weren’t the only people watching. “Yeah, I suppose you’re right.”
The woman was standing now with her hands to her mouth. The man’s back was to me, but I could just imagine what he was saying. Something about not wanting to spend another day without her and loving her for the rest of their lives and yada, yada, yada.
I rolled my eyes.
The woman nodded, and the room erupted in applause.
I picked up my wineglass and took more than a sip.
“Barf,” I said.
Paisley got a wistful look on her face. “I think it’s sweet.”
“You would,” Alexis joked, and we all started laughing.
Tonight was the monthly dinner I had with my six friends from high school. Tessa, Paisley, Alexis, Pru, Elizabeth, Isabelle, and I had been in choir together since we were freshmen in high school, which was funny because none of us had gone on to do a single thing with singing once we graduated.
And while I saw many of my friends outside of our regular meetup, it was hard for all of us to be in the same place at the same time. Because of this, we made our scheduled get-togethers months in advance. Every fourth Wednesday was reserved for us.
“Okay, Bree, what gives?” Tessa asked. “You seem extra salty tonight.”
Alexis nodded. “Yeah, I mean, we’re the unofficial She-Woman Man-Haters Club, but you seem a little more…”
“Hateful,” Paisley finished.
Isabelle wrinkled her nose. “Since when did we name ourselves the She-Woman Man-Haters Club?”
I shook my head in mock sadness. “You poor thing.”
“What?” Isabelle asked as she looked around at us.
Isabelle had had a strict mom, growing up, and she hardly ever got to watch movies or television. She’d even had to lie about what she watched whenever she hung out at one of our houses.
“It’s from The Little Rascals. They have a club called the He-Man Woman-Haters Club,” I explained.
Alexis smiled. “I’m glad someone got my joke.”
“I loved that movie when I was little,” Paisley said. “My brother, sister, and I would watch it all the time.”
“I think we need a better name for our little group,” Pru said.
I raised my glass. “How about Men Suck?”
It came out a little too loudly, and the guy at the table next to us looked over at us with a frown.
Paisley snorted her laughter and hid her mouth behind her napkin.
“Don’t mind her,” Elizabeth said about me. “She got cheated on. Again.”
The man next to us nodded and turned back to his date.
“You don’t have to tell everyone,” I pointed out.
Elizabeth shrugged. “Why? It’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”
“Yeah, right,” I muttered under my breath.
What’s the old saying?
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
That’s it.
Except for me, it was more like fool me three times, give up on men. I’d had four serious relationships since high school, and three of my boyfriends had cheated on me. And the other? Yeah, he’d decided he liked men better than women, so there you go.
I was beginning to think there was something wrong with me. In the end, I was the common denominator in all these relationships.
Thankfully, I had my friends. They were all single or divorced with a host of bad affairs behind them. Some time ago, we’d decided to embrace our solo lifestyles and just say no to men. We didn’t need them if we had each other.
“You’re not responsible for others’ actions, Bree. Only your own,” Elizabeth said. “But Tessa’s right. You do seem more upset tonight. Did something happen with the ex?”
“No,” I said with a sigh. “My cousin’s wedding is a little over a week away. It’s from Thursday to Sunday, which means, for four days, I will have to hear about how I’m the only single person in my whole family.”
“Holy crap.” Paisley’s eyes went wide as she took a commiserating sip of her wine. “How is a wedding that many days?”
“My cousin’s fiancé has money. We’re going to a lake resort. The groom rented out all the cabins for the wedding party. The place also has a hotel, and he rented the whole thing out for the guests. I don’t even think all the rooms are booked.”
Alexis whistled in amazement. “My ex-husband wouldn’t even pay for our own hotel room he was so cheap. We had to go home and sleep in our own bed on our wedding night.”
Tessa sipped her wine and looked about as disgusted as I had when I saw the couple getting engaged. She had a thing about rich people and had never really liked Alexis’s ex even though his family was more comfortable than rich. Not that I blamed her.
I set my glass down and leaned my arms on the table, feeling a bit defeated by the whole wedding situation. “If it were anyone else’s wedding, I would be excited. My cousin’s getting married on the beach at sunset, and I get to take two days off of work. It would be fun. But my mother is going to be there…”
I was an only child, and my mom was constantly asking when I was going to get married. She was the oldest of five girls, and she was so embarrassed her daughter didn’t have a husband yet. After my cousin was married, it would be only me and Kylie left. As the youngest cousin, Kylie was only seventeen.
I was on my own next weekend.
“How did she take your last breakup?” Tessa asked.
I sighed. “She doesn’t get it. I told her I caught Rick in bed with another woman. You know what she told me?”
Everyone shook their heads.
“That I can’t be so picky.”
“Ouch,” Pru said.
“Yeah. I told her I’d rather die alone than be with a cheater.” I shook my head sadly. “She doesn’t get it though. She thinks because my dad cheated that all guys do. She doesn’t understand that there are some actual good men o
“They all just happen to be taken or haven’t been born yet,” Pru said dryly.
“Exactly,” I agreed.
Paisley lifted a shoulder. “Take a fake boyfriend.”
Isabelle’s eyes lit up. “That’s a good idea.”
I raised my eyebrows in horror. “No way. Too complicated. Plus, I don’t even know anyone to take.”
“Is there someone from work?” Paisley asked.
“No. And even if there were, that would be too awkward.”
“Tessa,” a voice called out, and the seven of us turned our heads.
“Whoa,” Paisley said in a low voice. “Someone hold my underwear.”
Tessa whipped her head around. “Ew. That’s my brother.”
“He’s still hot,” Paisley pointed out with a shrug.
Paisley wasn’t wrong. Tessa’s brother, with his thick and dark hair and tempting teal-blue eyes, was hot as sin. To top it off, he had a short beard, and his left arm was covered in tattoos. I was a sucker for beards and tattoos.
I quickly picked up my wine and took a long drink.
“Hey, Zack,” Tessa said when her brother reached us. She looked at the pretty woman on her brother’s arm. “On a date?”
Zack smiled. “Tessa, this is Kim. Kim, this is my sister, Tessa.”
Kim smiled and put her hand up in a small wave.
Zack scanned the rest of us and stopped when he reached me. “Kim, these are my sister’s friends.”
I looked away from Zack. “Hi,” I said to Kim, as did my friends.
Tessa and Zack had gone to private school until Tessa transferred to our public high school. Zack had stayed where he was, so because of this, I—and the rest of my friends—didn’t know him that well. He had always been off, doing his own thing with his own friends in high school even though he was only two years older than us.
I peeked at Zack out of the corner of my eye to see if he was still looking at me, but he had turned his gaze to his date. It was a relief and a disappointment, but I didn’t let myself think about those feelings.
A few minutes later, Zack said good-bye, and then he and his date left.
“Is Kim your brother’s girlfriend?” Alexis asked.
Tessa laughed. “Uh…no. My brother is a manwhore. I don’t think he knows what a girlfriend is.”
“Ooh, Bree, you should take Zack as your date to the wedding,” Paisley said.
I had just taken a bite of my dinner, and I almost choked on it. Pounding my chest a couple of times, I shook my head. “I don’t think so. Dating men who can’t keep it in their pants is why I’m single as it is.”
“But this wouldn’t be a real date,” Paisley said. “It’s just so your mother will leave you alone.”
I tried to picture Zack with my family. I was sure my mother would love him.
And that would be if Zack even said yes.
Nah. Not worth it.
“I think I’ll pass.”
“Good decision,” Tessa said. “Zack is handsome and charming, but you can do better.”
I laughed. “You’re such a nice sister.”
She tilted her head and grinned. “I know.”
“So, if we’re not going to help Bree find a date for the wedding, then we should discuss our ‘club’ name,” Pru said, using finger quotes. “We’ve been doing these monthly dinners for a couple years. It would be fun to give ourselves a title.”
“I’m game, and I already said my idea.”
Paisley tapped her chin. “How about Single Ladies?”
“That’s a song,” Tessa said. “What about The Spinsters Club?”
“That term is antiquated and sexist,” Pru said. “Plus, it technically means, never married, and Alexis has been divorced.”
“Thanks for thinking of me,” Alexis said.
Pru picked up her glass. “Always.”
“Vibrators Forever,” Alexis said with a laugh, and Pru almost spit out her sip of wine.
“Hey, I still like sex,” Paisley said. And she did. In fact, she liked it a little too much and often got sexually involved with men who wanted to keep things casual…but then she would fall in love and get her heart broken when the guy didn’t want to get serious.
“How about No More Bad Dates?” Elizabeth offered.
Isabelle pursed her lips, and then her eyes went wide. “How about Not Another Romance?”
I smiled at my friends. “I don’t think it matters what we’re called. As long as we’re united single ladies with our vibrators so that we never have another bad date or experience romance again.”
“You forgot She-Woman Man-Haters and Men Suck,” Alexis said with a laugh, bringing up the two names we’d said earlier.
“Right.” I picked up my wine and held it out. “Here’s to United She-Woman Single Ladies with Our Vibrators So We Never Have Another Bad Date or Experience Romance Again Because Men Suck Club.”
My friends picked up their glasses as well, and we clinked our drinks together.
“Hear, hear,” Pru said, and we all laughed at our ridiculously long name. “But I think Isabelle’s idea was shorter.”
“And,” Paisley added, “I think we still need to find you a date for the wedding.”
God, no. That was never going to happen.
Chapter Two
Bree
The next morning, my phone rang as I was getting ready for work.
“Hello, Mom,” I said when I answered.
“Good morning.”
“Morning.” I put my phone on speaker, so I could finish putting on my makeup.
“I’m headed over to your aunt’s house this morning.”
I sighed. I knew where this was headed. She didn’t even have to tell me which aunt she was referring to.
“Oh?” was my only response.
“Yeah, I’m helping with the wedding plans. I figure I don’t have anything else to do.”
Yeah, I got the message. She could be helping me with my wedding plans if I were getting married.
“Sounds fun,” I said as I put on my mascara.
“Why don’t you join us?”
“Because I have to work. It’s Thursday.”
“Well, Tina’s not working.”
I looked down at my phone. “It’s Tina’s wedding.”
“I know. I just—”
“No, Mom.”
“No what?”
“Just no. Whatever it is you’re going to say, no.”
“Why did you break up with Rick again?”
Really? “He cheated on me.”
“Honey, men stray. It’s not a reason to let go of a good man.”
I clenched my fists and bared my teeth. “Mom, it might have been fine for you, but it’s not for me. I deserve better.”
“Don’t say that about your father—may he rest in peace.”
He had been an okay dad, but he had been a shitty husband, and I had no plans to take back my words.
“Is there something else I can help you with?” I asked. I was about done with this conversation.
“What, I need a reason to speak to my daughter?”
Here comes the guilt trip.
“No, but I really do need to finish getting ready for work.”
“If you had a husband, you wouldn’t have to work.”
I groaned. Never mind that I wanted to work, husband or no husband.
“Maybe you’ll meet someone at the wedding.”
My ears were ringing now. So, now, I was going to spend next weekend hearing about why I was single while she tried to set me up with every single guy from eighteen to sixty.
I couldn’t handle it.
