Lovin' Dirty (Beautifully Dirty #3), page 1
Copyright © Paige Steele
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of Paige Steele, except as permitted under the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976.
This is a work of fiction. All characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Cover Design and Formatting by: Pink Ink
Cover Model: Steven Brewis
Photographer: Adam Bouska
Editing by: K. Hrdlicka and Kellie Montgomery
This is a work of fiction. All names, characters, places and events portrayed in this book either are from the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, establishments, events, or location is purely coincidental and not intended by the author. Please do not take offense to the content, as it is FICTION.
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This book contains mature content not suitable for those under the age of 18. Involves strong language and sexual situations. All parties portrayed in sexual situations are adults over the age of 18.
All characters are fictional. Any similarities are purely coincidental.
Published by Paige Steele
Table of Contents
Dedication
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Epilogue
Get the dirt on Paige
About the Author
Acknowledgements
Dedicated to:
All my dirty, flirty friends.
I CAN’T SEE HER, but I can hear her. She doesn’t know I’m listening to her cry at night after my parents and Mr. and Mrs. Evans say their goodbyes. All four of them kiss me on the cheek before telling Ansley that they’re right next door if she needs them, and then she cries. It’s breaking my heart in two, not being able to hold her and tell her I’m going to be okay. I can’t get my arms to move, and my eyes don’t seem to want to open either. As I lay here wondering, I wish I knew exactly what was going on. Then I feel her close to me as she presses her lips against my cheek and whispers close to my ear . . .
“Cooper, you need to wake up. I need your arms surrounding me, squeezing me tightly, showering me with your warmth, and telling me you’re going to be okay. Please, Cooper, wake up, I need you.”
I’m yelling at her inside my head, she just doesn’t hear me. It’s been crazy lying here listening to my mom cry as well. I don’t think I’ve ever heard her do that before, not even when my grandparents passed away. She never shed a tear in front of me, possibly behind closed doors, but never where I could see her. My father is showing his softer side also. Barking orders has always been his specialty; so hearing him shout things at the doctors and nurses hasn’t surprised me. However, the other night he spoke quietly next to me, telling me that he’s sorry for not being the dad that I deserved growing up. The next thing I remember is him telling me that he’s been proud of me for a long time, as he hugged me. I’m assuming he was alone in the room when this took place because it would have been difficult for him to display this kind of affection in front of anyone, let alone me.
The one person I haven’t heard from is Ryan. Though I’m pretty sure he’s here somewhere, because I’ve been listening to Ansley and his parents talk to him as well. Damn it, I wish I knew what is going on with us.
A doctor just came in and let everyone know he will be taking me for another round of testing. He said he’d be looking to see if the bleeding is slowing down and if the tear is healing at all.
“Are you going to stop giving him so much medication so he can wake up soon?”
Oh, I know that voice, that’s Ansley; there is still a sound of worry in her voice. I’m waiting to hear the answer but I don’t, instead I fall into a deeper sleep.
Soon Ansley, I can feel it inside . . . I’ll wake up and we’ll never be apart again.
Ansley
SITTING IN BETWEEN these two beds is driving me crazy. I haven’t slept in what feels like days. When the doctor ran down the hallway toward the guys’ room, I thought I was going to die; it was as if my world stopped. There’s no way I could lose either one of my best friends. That happened very early Sunday morning and now it’s Thursday.
Ryan has been stable now for a couple of days, so they’re planning on doing his surgery tomorrow. The doctors explained that he is going to need a plate with several screws to get his wrist to heal correctly, and that he’ll most likely have an external fixator, instead of a cast. Having the external fixator on his wrist means he’ll have a metal rod and screws on the outside as well. The doctors will be able to monitor the healing of the wrist better, and as long as he follows their orders, then he should be able to ride again, but it will be a long healing process.
Cooper is still unconscious, though the doctors tell me it’s because they’re keeping him heavily sedated, so his spleen has a chance to heal on its own, otherwise it will require surgery. They’ve informed us, so far so good. After Saturday, they’re going to decrease the meds so he can start staying awake for short time periods. Coop’s dad stepped up and paid to have specialists flown in for both his son and Ryan. He also donated his own blood when they said they wanted to give Cooper a blood transfusion. When they said it could take a few days for the blood to be tested, he then paid more money to have people work overtime to make sure it would be ready when or if needed.
So, now I sit and wait. I won’t leave their side. The hospital has been great giving me a reclining chair to sleep in, as well as their parents. Then again, Coop’s dad has been paying to have the hospital room next door to the guys available to us to sleep in and shower. But I can’t seem to pull myself away from them longer than it takes for me to wash up and brush my teeth. I won’t miss them waking up, I want their eyes to look into mine; so pulling my recliner between their beds to face them is my only choice.
“Honey, you need to get some rest,” Mr. Evans says, as he walks up and puts his arm around my shoulder, while I’m slumped forward in the chair.
“I can’t rest until I know they are both okay . . . like really okay,” I say, looking down with a tear stained face.
“The doctors have said that they are both doing well. Cooper’s spleen is healing nicely, and Ryan’s just about ready for surgery.”
“I know, but until they both are able to look at me, smile, and talk to me, I’m not leaving.”
“Ansley, the guys are going to be mad when they hear you’ve barely eaten or that you haven’t taken care of yourself.”
“Then I guess they’ll be mad, because there’s no way I’m leaving. They wouldn’t leave me, so I’m not leaving them.”
“Understandable, well, I’m going to get something to eat in the coffee shop downstairs, then we’re sitting down together, and you my dear are eating something.”
“As long as we sit in here, I’ll try. I just haven’t had much of an appetite these days.”
“Okay, I’ll be back,” says Mr. Evans, as he leans forward and kisses the top of my head.
Both moms head out to buy some more clothes; still being in Vegas has been hard. Until the guys are stable enough to travel, we all agree to stay put. But I know I’m not leaving until they both leave with me, end of discussion.
Kenna and Maddie flew back yesterday; they’re only going back to pick up our mail, get some clothes, and then they’re going to drive back. It’ll take between five to six hours, but at least we will have a car here. They’ve spoken to Hyped Energy about all three of us taking some time off. They agreed and said they’ll put us back in rotation when we’re ready to get back at it. I know for myself, I won’t be going to another race until I know these two are home and doing better.
As for Cooper’s dad, he’s been handling all the press and overseeing the day-to-day care of the guys. He’s been staying on top of the doctors and knows exactly what they’re planning to do and when. It has amazed me how he’s stepped it up. I guess what they say is true; sometimes a tragedy can bring a family together.
After I sit and eat a half of sandwich with Mr. Evans, I run over to take a quick
I lean up against the wall and break down, tears roll down my cheeks, and I can’t seem to stop them. Even though there have been several people coming and going, I can’t shake the feeling of being alone. Needing and wanting them to wake up is consuming me.
There is a knock on the door and it startles me back to reality.
“Ansley, honey, are you okay?”
“Mom?”
“Yes, dear, it’s me.”
I can’t get out fast enough, throwing my hair up in a towel, and then tucking one around my body, I open the door.
“Oh my God, Mom. I can’t believe you’re here!” I don’t think I realized how much I needed her here until I heard her voice and I look at her. I start sobbing harder. As she reaches forward and pulls me into a hug, I drop my forehead to her shoulder.
“It’s going to be okay. Those two are your best friends, and they’re way too stubborn not to pull through all this.”
“Agreed.” I pull back just enough to look into my mom’s eyes, trying to grin a bit at her too.
“Let’s get you dressed and brush out that hair, then you and I are going outside for a walk. I hear my daughter hasn’t been outside to see the sun in almost a week.”
“Mom, I don’t want to go.”
“That’s not an option, dear.”
“Mom, I’m not going,” I say, as I walk over to my bag and pull out my comb.
“Ansley, when those two wake up, they’re going to expect to see the Ansley they always see, not the one that is pale with no smile on her face. So, you need to get some fresh air, and besides, Mr. Evan’s assured me he will call your cell phone if anything changes.”
“Honestly, I don’t want to go. I’ll never forgive myself if something happens and I’m not here.”
“I’m not taking no for an answer. I’ll get you back here in exactly thirty minutes, now where are your clothes?”
I turn to see her looking around the room as I pull things from the bag that Maddie and Kenna left for me. Thank goodness they left me some of their clothes as well, and that they’ll be back late tonight.
Finally giving up, because I know my mom will hound me until I’m out the door and walking, I dress, do my hair, put some Chapstick on, and follow behind her as she walks out. Making sure I’m only gone for a half hour, I keep checking my phone.
“Honey, relax.”
“Mom, please don’t start. You know I’m out here for you,” I say, as she puts her arm around my shoulders, and I drop the side of my head into her.
“Ansley, the boys would want you to take care of yourself, too. You’re no good to them if you aren’t healthy when they wake up.”
“I know you’re right, but it’s hard. They’re everything to me.”
“And you are to them.”
We walk around as I keep checking my cell phone for the time, and to make sure I haven’t missed any calls. My phone chimes to let me know of a text coming in and I can’t pull it out of my pocket fast enough.
Maddie—Hey girl, we’re on our way back. Do you need anything else before we head out?
Me—No, just get back here.
Maddie—We’re hurrying, girl, I promise. Any changes?
Me—No, not since I last talked to you. Please drive safe. I love you guys.
Maddie—We love you too. Since Kenna is driving, text me if you need anything and with updates.
Me—I will.
I click send and shove it back in my pocket. Kenna’s been texting me non-stop about both guys but mainly about Ryan. They both care about each other but haven’t admitted to it yet.
After thirty-four minutes, and yes in case you are wondering, I really did keep track, we head back in. The elevator seems to go too slow for my liking, and I can’t get off it fast enough. Not really prepared for what I come back into the room to see, I stop dead in my tracks in the doorway.
“What are you two doing here?” Seeing my two coworkers standing at his bedside doesn’t sit well with me. They’re the same two I saw him walk into the bedroom with at Ryan’s house.
“We know Cooper too, ya know?”
“Don’t remind me.”
“So we came to see if he was alright.”
“You could have called, I would’ve given you an update.”
“Maybe we wanted to see for ourselves how he is.”
“Whatever, you’ve seen, now you can go.”
“Ansley, that’s no way to talk.” Mom sounds annoyed at me, but if she only knew what I know, she wouldn’t be.
“It’s okay, we’re two of her coworkers but not friends. Though we’re friends of Cooper’s.”
“No, you aren’t. Sleeping with him once doesn’t make you friends, it makes you used for one night.” I am annoyed more than ever. How dare she say they’re friends?
“Whatever. Jealousy isn’t a color that looks good on you, Ansley.”
“Get out.” I might have shouted it just a tad above my speaking voice, or so I think.
One of the nurses rushes in as my mom raises her voice to get my attention. She asks the two sluts to leave as I sit down, though she might not have called them that and asked them nicer than I would have. The nurse and I have gotten to know each other this week. She’s a mother of two boys herself and is a very loving lady. I think talking to her at night has kept me from going insane with worry. Hearing stories of her family and seeing her speak with such love for them eased my mind. Knowing the guys are being taken care of by someone with a heart means a lot.
As the evening approaches, so do both sets of parents and dinner. Mom stays until they come, then she goes and checks into her hotel. I found out that Mr. Brewis has put her up in one close by, paying for the next few days while she’s here. He’s really stepped into the role of the caring dad. Cooper will be shocked when I tell him.
I just want to sit like I have for the past several days, but everyone keeps shoving food in my face. So to shut them all up, I take a carton of fried rice with a fork, I’m not in the mood to fight with chopsticks today. Sitting down in my chair, which is still set between their beds, I sit facing them, like always.
While we are discussing what the next steps are going to be, Ryan’s surgeon walks in. He lets us know that they are ready to move forward with his surgery. It’s on the books for Saturday afternoon, which to me only means a long day. That’s also the day Coop’s doctors said they’ll reduce his meds, allowing him to slowly wake up.
THE SURGEON WALKED in to talk to us all for a moment, while his nurse walked in behind him to take Ryan off to the operating room. We’re told the surgery will take between two to four hours, depending on what they get involved in once he’s under. After I go over to Ryan’s bedside and tell him that we’ll see him after surgery, I tell Kenna to go talk to him. She has been staring at him so I can tell she wants to say something. She whispers next to his ear so no one else can hear, just him. And yes I do believe he can hear us, even if he can’t talk back. The doctors have reassured us that once they finish the surgery, he’ll be out for a couple more days to make sure things are stable in the wrist, but then he’ll also be weaned off his meds, so he can wake up for longer periods as well.
Ryan’s parents are going down to get coffee with Coop’s, and then they’re going to head up to the waiting room down the hall from the OR, while Maddie, Kenna, and my mom wait in the room with me. Mom is heading back home tomorrow, she wants to make sure today goes okay, and then she needs to return to her job. It’s nice having her here, not only for support, but because being a nurse, she has been helping all of us understand all the medical terms that the doctors use.
Cooper’s nurses have been in and out all morning, changing out his IV bags for new ones, while the nurses have been giving him fresh blankets and pillows. He’s been lying there so still, and that just isn’t Coop, my Coop. He is always on the go, doing something. I’m so excited for today, the day he will possibly look me in the eyes again.
Just as Mr. and Mrs. Brewis walk back in, so does Cooper’s doctor. He starts to tell us the steps that they have been taking already and what else will be going on for the rest of today. At five o’clock tonight, they will have reduced his medications enough that he should be able to open his beautiful eyes and wake up.
