Shattered Vows (Midnight Manor Book 2), page 15
So even though it’s killing me, and the green-eyed monster claws come out, I walk over to the other side of my bedroom and stare out the window with my arms crossed as she dials the number. That doesn’t mean I won’t be listening to every single word that comes out of her mouth.
“Hello, Alistair? It’s Lillian.”
My jaw flexes at the mention of her fake name.
“I’m fine, I’m fine. I’m sorry it’s taken this long to call you… I know, I’m sorry.”
She’s quiet for a long time. I swear to Christ, if I get the impression that he’s giving her a hard time, I’m going to reach through that phone and rip out his vocal cords.
“I’m glad my mom called you like I asked her to. I just wanted to call to apologize. I never should have said yes to your proposal… I know you did, but you deserve someone who loves you with her whole heart and that wasn’t me.”
I swear I feel her eyes on my back after she says that.
“You’re right I shouldn’t have run away like that, but I was scared.”
I spin around to walk over and rip the phone out of her hand, knowing he’s saying something unkind to her, but Rapsody raises her hand, so I stay in place. He says something else that has her shoulders sagging—whether in relief or guilt, I can’t be sure, but this fucker better hope it’s relief.
“I wish I had done things differently. I hope you’ll forgive me.”
My hands clench at my sides.
“Thank you. I’m sorry if I hurt you… I agree it’s better this way. I know you’ll find someone who will make you happy… Okay, you too.” She pulls the phone from her ear and ends the call.
The need to pin her on the bed and fuck her raw burrows inside me, but it’s only been one day since I took her virginity. She’s not ready yet. Especially for the way I want to dominate and own her body right now just to prove that she’s mine.
And she is. Mine.
The moment I pushed inside her, I knew there was no going back. That my feeble attempts at keeping my feelings at bay were all for nothing because this woman fucking owns me. Always has, and always will.
So I force myself to set aside the fact that she was talking to another man, a man she was all set to marry if I hadn’t shown up. “Feel better now?”
She nods and stands from the edge of the bed. “Yes, thank you.” She walks over and hands me the phone.
I slip it in my back pocket. “What did he say?”
She arches an eyebrow, something I don’t think I’ve seen her do. “I think you have a good idea of what was said.” She smirks, knowing I was listening to everything.
“Fair enough. You ready to go eat dinner now?”
“Yeah, sure.” She places a kiss on my lips.
It starts out innocent enough but quickly progresses into making out. When I can see the direction we’re headed, I step out of her arms.
“I think we should cut it off there, otherwise we’re not going to make it to dinner.”
Rapsody sticks out her bottom lip in a pout, and it makes me want to nibble on it. She’s made it perfectly fucking clear that she wants me to fuck her again, and I will. Believe me, I’m counting down the damn days until I can be inside her again.
“Fine. Let’s go.”
I take her hand and lead her out of my bedroom. We make our way through the manor, past the centuries-old furniture and the paintings of ancestors I never knew. I’m used to the gloom and oppressive feeling inside the manor, but I wonder what she thinks of it. I’m afraid to ask.
When we reach the communal part of the property and are headed down the hall that leads to the dining room, Anabelle calls out from behind us.
“Where’s Asher?” I ask when I see she’s alone. Those two are attached at the hip these days.
“He’s finishing up a call. I was starving, so I told him I’d meet him there.”
I smirk. “Bet he liked that.”
Anabelle rolls her eyes, but she knows I’m right.
“I’m glad you caught us,” Rapsody says. “I had a couple of things I wanted to talk to you about.”
My sister-in-law’s head tilts. “Everything okay?”
Rapsody drops my hand and plays with her fingers in front of her as though she’s nervous, but I have no idea why. “I wanted to apologize for how I spoke to you the night I asked you what goes on in the basement.”
Anabelle’s look of concern softens to understanding. “Don’t worry about it. I know exactly how you felt. There was a time I was questioning Asher about it, and he wouldn’t tell me. I get how frustrating it can feel to know you’re the only one without the information.”
Rapsody smiles, seeming relieved. “Still. I shouldn’t have given you attitude.”
Anabelle squeezes Rapsody’s hand, and this weird feeling, warmth or something, fills my chest at seeing my brother’s wife be so kind to my… my what? She’s not my fiancée anymore, but we’re certainly not friends.
Rapsody’s voice pulls me from my thoughts. “There’s one other thing I wanted to ask.”
Anabelle smiles. “Of course.”
“I want to get my hair cut shorter, and I thought that maybe you would know someone who can do it.”
Anabelle grins, appearing excited. “Yes! I can get you an appointment with my girl in town. Magnolia Bend only has one place, but I swear she does a great job.”
Now Rapsody knows the name of the town we’re in. She hasn’t asked up to this point, and I haven’t offered.
“Really?”
“We’ll make a whole girls’ day of it. We can get our hair done and go to dinner, maybe have a drink. It’ll be so fun.”
I frown, wanting to shut down the idea of a whole girls’ day, but when I see Rapsody’s happiness, I can’t do it. This is probably the first female friendship she’s tried to cultivate in her life.
“Oh my god, I can’t wait!” Rapsody looks over at me.
I force myself to smile at her no matter how much I don’t like the idea of her being out of my sight. It’s hard not to worry that she’s going to disappear again after what happened last time. But as much as my instincts push me to shut down this shit, I can’t keep her chained to me. I can’t be the same person as her mother, and I suspect I know why.
Because despite my best efforts, it’s over. I’ve fallen back in love with her.
Chapter
Twenty-Six
RAPSODY
It’s not until the following week that Anabelle can get me an appointment with her hairdresser. I’ve been counting down the days even though I’m nervous about what I’ll look like without my long hair. But this change feels necessary, like the next step in my journey to discover who I really am.
Kol has filled my days, though—first by taking me to the horse races and Go-Cart riding, which was a bit of a disaster since I’ve never driven anything in my life. I saw Kol hand the guy money for the dented barriers I couldn’t stop running into.
The best part of my nights and days is him having sex with me. Lots and lots of sex.
Since the initial few days passed, he has been insatiable. Well, I can tell he’s still holding back. As much as I insist I’m not made of glass, he won’t listen. I figure it will take him time to come around.
Anabelle parks her expensive car on the side of the road outside an older building with a sign over it that says Scuttlebutt Salon.
“I take it that a lot of gossiping goes on here?”
She laughs. “Yes, but don’t worry, no one here is dumb enough to ask about anything that happens up at Midnight Manor. No one talks about the Voss brothers.”
I frown. “Are they scared of them?”
“You could say that.” She climbs out of the car, so I follow suit.
The bell above the door dings when we enter, and everyone turns to face us. Anabelle doesn’t appear fazed, strolling up to her hairdresser. I hope to have confidence like her around people one day.
“Dorothy, this is my friend, Rapsody, that I told you about.” Anabelle motions to me at her side.
A plump woman in her late fifties smiles at me. “Well, look at you.” She laughs and touches my forearm. “You need a trim.”
My cheeks heat. “More than a trim really.”
“Don’t you worry, I’m gonna fix you right up. Now come on over, and have a seat, tell me what you’re thinking.” She walks over to a worn blue leather hairdresser’s chair and pats the back.
I walk over and sit, looking at Anabelle over my shoulder in the mirror. She’s giving me an encouraging smile.
“I want a change. A drastic one. I want you to cut it to my shoulders.”
“Now we’re talking!” Dorothy says. “All these other women are worrying about a half inch here, a half inch there. You just made my day.” She inspects my hair and meets my gaze in the mirror. “Do you want to donate what we cut off?”
“Donate it?” I look at her, confused.
“Yeah. I’ll put it in a ponytail and cut right above where the hair is secure. They use it to make wigs for cancer patients who have lost their hair.”
Oh, that makes me happy. “Definitely then.”
Dorothy sets about collecting what she needs, and Anabelle sits in the empty chair to my left.
“Are you nervous?” Anabelle asks me.
I nod. “Yes, but more excited than nervous. It’s time for a change.”
“Okay, let me just get this in a ponytail.” Dorothy gathers my hair in a loose ponytail down my back and picks up her scissors, placing the open blades around my hair. “Ready?”
I suck in a cleansing breath and nod. “Ready.”
She presses on the shears, and I feel her cutting through the pile of strands until a giant weight lifts off my head—literally.
Dorothy holds up the long ponytail to my side. “The hardest part is done, sweetie. You still good?”
My eyes glisten as I admire the long, cumbersome locks in her hands. Not because I’m sad I cut it off, but because it’s a physical representation of the transformation I’ve been going through since arriving at Midnight Manor, and it feels right. “I’m good. I’m happy.”
Dorothy gives me a knowing smile. “All right, we’re cooking with gas now. Let’s finish the job.”
An hour later, I leave the salon feeling like a new woman. Not only did I get my hair cut, but a woman who is a makeup artist declared today a makeover day for me and squeezed me in. She didn’t go crazy with the makeup, but it’s enough to make a difference. Everyone was so nice.
I’ve never worn makeup before. I used to beg my mom when I was a teen, asking if I could buy some to play around with, and she always said no. Told me it sexualizes a woman, and there was no need for it.
“I can’t tell you how much I love it,” Anabelle says for probably the fifth time.
“Me too. I didn’t think I’d like it this much. I mean, I knew I needed a change, but I didn’t know I’d love it this much.” I giggle like a schoolgirl. “And my head feels so light.”
I still can’t stop swishing my head side to side, amazed by how light my hair is.
“Kol is going to lose it when he sees you, trust me.”
I stop midstep. “You think he’s going to be mad?”
Anabelle throws her head back and laughs. “No, he’s going to be turned on.”
“Oh.” My cheeks heat, but I hope that she’s right, and this is what makes him give up on treating me like a valuable piece of porcelain when we sleep together.
“What do you want to do now? Are you hungry? Do you want to grab a drink?” she asks.
“That Black Magic place looks interesting.”
She raises her eyebrows. “Black Magic Bar? Sure, let’s go there. We can get some drinks, and they have food too.”
I smile at her. “Lead the way.”
We walk the short distance down the street, and Anabelle opens the door to let me walk in first. I’ve never been in a bar, so I don’t know what to expect. But what I see is what I think most people would term a dive bar, if it had creepy vibes. Lined up on shelves against an exposed brick wall are bottles of liquor, voodoo dolls, portraits of tarot cards, half-burned candles of different colors, crystals, and skulls. There’s more of them throughout the bar too. Stools are lined up along the bar, and there are worn wood tables littered throughout the space.
Anabelle comes in behind me and waves to the woman working behind the bar, so I follow Anabelle over there.
“Hey, stranger. It’s been a while. How’s married life?” she asks Anabelle.
“It’s perfect. Which is why I haven’t been here much.”
The woman laughs. “I bet.”
Anabelle turns to me. “Cinder, this is Rapsody. Rapsody, Cinder.”
“Nice to meet you.” Cinder gives me a warm smile and extends her hand over the bar.
She’s really beautiful, and if I wasn’t feeling so good about myself right now, I might feel self-conscious in her presence. Her long blond hair hangs in waves to her large breasts, and she’s wearing a tight white tank top and short denim shorts that showcase all her curves.
I take her hand. “Good to meet you.”
“What can I get you ladies?” Cinder asks.
Anabelle looks at me. I don’t plan on drinking after my last experience.
“I’ll just have a sweet tea please,” I say.
Cinder nods and looks at Anabelle.
“Wine spritzer for me since it’s not even dinner time yet.”
Cinder laughs and nods down toward the end of the bar at a couple of men who look to be in their early forties who have obviously been partaking for a while. “Not everyone waits until dinner.”
We laugh while Cinder works on our drinks.
Anabelle turns to me. “Want to sit at the bar or go get a table?”
I glance down at the dress I’m wearing. It reaches my knees, so I should be fine to sit on a bar stool. “Let’s sit at the bar. I’ve never sat at one before.”
Anabelle gives me a quizzical look and slides onto a stool, motioning for me to take the one next to her. She doesn’t say anything for a second, and I’m sure she’s wondering what planet I just descended from.
“You mentioned in the salon that you’ve never worn makeup and then you just said that you’ve never sat at a bar… I was just wondering—and I hope it’s not rude of me to ask, I just want to get to know you better—did you grow up in a really religious home or something?”
I don’t blame her for asking. I’d be curious, too, if I were her and met a twenty-three-year-old who was such a novice at so many things. So I explain to her the way my mom raised me, though I don’t mention the why of it. I may have shared with Kol that my mother was assaulted, but it’s not something I feel right about telling everyone.
“That must have been really difficult,” she says.
“It was honestly fine until I reached my teens. I guess I didn’t know any better, but then when I started watching certain TV shows and surfing the internet, I realized there was this whole world out there I was missing out on. But at the same time, I was afraid of the idea of experiencing it.”
Cinder slides our drinks in front of us.
“Thanks,” I say before taking a sip of mine.
Before she can answer, one of the guys at the end of the bar calls, “Hey, sweet tits, get yer ass down here and fill me up.” He raises his beer mug.
My eyes widen.
“You should kick them out,” Anabelle says in a low voice.
“Their bark is bigger than their bite, believe me. And they tip well.” She winks before heading to the end of the bar.
“Are all guys like that?” I ask Anabelle. Maybe my mom was right about most men. Perhaps Kol and his brothers are the exception and not the rule.
Anabelle shakes her head. “Not at all. But alcohol doesn’t usually bring out the best in people.”
I nod, leaning in to take another sip of my drink. “So what is this place? It’s kind of…”
“Weird?” Anabelle laughs. “Yeah, it’s not your typical dive bar, that’s for sure. Local urban legend is that the woman who owns it is a witch.”
I blink rapidly. “Really?”
She nods. “Yeah. She’s not really here anymore because she’s older. Mostly has other people do the day-to-day for her now.”
“Do you think she’s a witch?”
Anabelle considers it while she sips on her spritzer. “Not sure. It’s possible, I guess. Wouldn’t be the weirdest thing that has happened around here.”
I want to ask what she means, but I get the sense she’ll probably blow me off if I do. Maybe if we become closer, in time I’ll be comfortable digging a little more.
We chat for a while, Anabelle telling me about her life, where she went to college and how she came to be in Asher Voss’s orbit. Eventually I need to pee.
I slip off the stool. “I have to go to the restroom. I’ll be right back.”
“Okay.” Anabelle pulls her phone from her purse as I set off toward the hallway that has the restroom sign above it.
I use the facilities, and as I wash my hands, someone says my name. I look into the mirror to see who would know me here. My stomach drops.
Because it’s my mother.
“Mom!” I wheel around and face her, pulling her into a hug. “What are you doing here?”
When I draw back, she’s looking somewhat frantic. “We have to go. Now.” She grips my arm, but I yank it free.
“Go? Go where?”
“Away from him. Now let’s go.” She heads toward the door.
“I’m not going anywhere, Mom. I don’t want to.”
She whips around to face me, hurt and anger glowing. “I knew he’d sink his claws into you. He’s brainwashed you.”
“He has not.”
“You think you can handle someone like him? He’s evil. Look at all the people he’s killed—in the military, his own father, probably his mother, and who knows who else.”
“He has not!” I stomp my foot like a toddler.
“Look at you.” My mom waves her hand up and down my body. “Short skirt, your hair is all gone, and you look like a trollop with that makeup. Is this all in an effort to keep him interested? Mark my words, Rapsody, one day he’ll tire of you and set you aside as if you meant nothing. And you’ll be heartbroken and all alone. A man like Kol Voss, a man who can have anything and anyone he wants, isn’t going to stay satisfied with the likes of you.”
