Hired, page 24
“Now, in case you did not know what causes the northern lights, they are the result of solar particles entering the earth's magnetic field. They ionize high up in the atmosphere, and because they only appear near the magnetic poles, you can only see them close to either the magnetic north pole or the magnetic south pole. The southern lights are called the aurora australis, but they are much less known.”
Hmm, maybe something for Hadley to add to his bucket list? How Sebastian wanted to help him check off all those things from his bucket list…and go with him. He’d always loved traveling, and hopefully, now that he’d decided to step down as CEO, he would have more time for it again. How much fun would it be to show Hadley the Caribbean? Or the wonders of Australia and New Zealand. Go sailing in the Mediterranean. So many places to explore, things to see and do, and Sebastian wanted Hadley to experience it all.
“Because Reykjavík itself has some light pollution as a bigger city, we will take you to Grótta, which is a nature reserve on a peninsula northwest of Reykjavík. In the summer, many rare birds build their nests there, but in the winter, it is the perfect place to see the aurora borealis. The most important thing to remember is that Grótta is only accessible at low tide, so only for a few hours at a time. The peninsula is connected to the mainland by a thin sandspit that becomes submerged in high tide. That's why we can't do tours every evening. We are dependent on it being low tide. So it's important to keep an eye on the clock and make sure you are back on time. If not, you could become stranded for a few hours. You would not be the first, but I don't recommend it.”
Everyone chuckled.
“For now, just sit back and enjoy the ride. We should be there in a little over an hour.”
After a smooth ride, the van parked in a small parking lot, where a single streetlight stood as a lonely beacon in the darkness. As soon as they got out, Sebastian looked to the sky. His heart skipped a beat. The first green waves were already visible, and they hadn't even reached Grótta yet. “Look,” he said to Hadley, pointing upward.
Hadley followed his finger and gasped. He grabbed Sebastian's arm, squeezing much harder than he probably realized. “You see that? Oh my god, that's… The northern lights. I can already see them.”
Christian walked past them, smiling. “I told you. You have picked a good night.”
Even though that part was luck, Sebastian was still proud he’d managed to arrange this for Hadley. If he’d been dreaming of seeing them for so long, he needed the full experience. Gratitude filled his chest. He was so glad to share this with Hadley, to be able to do this for him and with him.
“Come,” Christian said. “I will show you the perfect place to watch.”
As he disappeared in the dark, the group followed him, Sebastian and Hadley in the back. They walked for a few minutes, the sound of the crashing waves growing louder and louder. And then they traversed the spit that Christian had mentioned, the sea so close on either side Sebastian's cheeks got damp from the water splashing into his face. Damn, he was happy he'd followed the advice on the tour operator’s website to put on warm clothes and had dressed in his ski jacket and pants. The clear sky meant perfect views but also icy temperatures and a chilly wind.
Sebastian kept looking up to the sky, which turned greener and greener. Darkness had enveloped them now. Even the streetlamp of the parking lot wasn’t visible anymore. And god, the stars… They took Sebastian's breath away. Holding hands, they made their way over to the lighthouse of Grótta.
“This is the perfect place to watch. As you can see, the aurora borealis has already started, but it will become more intense in the next two hours. You can walk around, but there is also a geothermally heated pool you can put your feet in to keep them warm as you watch. It is very comfortable. Make sure you are back here in two hours.”
Sebastian nodded, and then he and Hadley walked away from the others. “I assume you don’t want to go to the pool right away?” he asked Hadley.
“No. I want to enjoy it with the two of us for now.”
They found a wooden bench and sat down. In the distance, the waves lapped against the rocks, but other than that, silence surrounded them. Above their heads, the show started. So bright green it was almost fluorescent, the sky waved and danced, like giant floodlights or a stroboscope were painting the black with hues of green. Light green, moss green, dark green, so much green.
Next to him, Hadley gasped. “It's so much more intense than I could've imagined,” he whispered. “God, Sebastian, this is amazing. It's magical.”
Magical. It was the perfect word for the spectacle they were treated to. Flashing beams of green moved through the sky like ghosts, leaving trails behind that glowed for a little before they died down, only to light up again.
“The color is changing.” Hadley’s voice was filled with wonder. “You see that? It's turning more yellow.”
“It is.”
They kept watching as the colors changed, picking up more yellow, then morphing into shades of blue. Hadley snuggled closer to him, and Sebastian put his arm around his shoulders and pulled him tight against him. They barely said a word and just watched, gasping on occasion, pointing at particularly spectacular areas. But mostly, they just took it in, soaking up the experience.
“This is one of the best moments of my life,” Hadley said, choked up with emotions. “To see this, to share this with you, it's… You've given me something I'll never forget.”
Those same emotions Sebastian had felt before filled his chest again, only this time, he recognized them. Gratitude. Happiness. Joy. All the sensations he so rarely felt anymore, not since college. And here he was, watching this magnificent spectacle, but the reason he was happy wasn't the show. It was Hadley. Doing this for and with Hadley was what made him so grateful and happy.
Love. He was in love with him. Holy shit.
The truth of that realization sent a shock wave through him, and strangely enough, it brought tears to his eyes. He’d never seen this coming, had never expected it, and yet here he was, observing the most extraordinary spectacle with the man he’d fallen so hard for. The only man who’d seen past his grumpiness, who had seen the real him. The only man who had never, not even for a moment, been intimated by or attracted to him for his money.
Hadley moved, and when Sebastian looked sideways, he caught Hadley wiping away tears. “You’re crying?” he asked, alarmed.
Hadley leaned his head back on Sebastian’s shoulder. “They’re good tears.”
“Oh, okay.”
“I haven’t cried since I was ten,” Hadley said after a while, both of them still staring at the sky, which hadn’t stopped changing.
Since he was ten? That had to mean something, but Sebastian didn’t ask. Hadley was as private as him, and if he wanted to tell him, he would without being asked. Sebastian just held him a little tighter, hoping that would signal he was listening.
“My parents were drug addicts,” Hadley said, his voice soft. “Both of them. They must’ve started after they had me because I wasn’t born addicted, but I can’t remember a time when they weren’t high or waiting to get high. Not that I realized that at the time. It was my normal, you know? But I was hungry. Always hungry because they forgot about me, forgot to buy food or give me something to eat. I depended on the kindness of strangers.”
Sebastian’s heart ached for that little boy. What a horrible way to grow up.
“School was the first to call DCFS. That was when I was six, and my kindergarten teacher was worried because I was malnourished and dirty. This lady came to the house, and my mom, who happened to be coming off a high and was functioning more or less, told her everything was fine. The lady believed her, and that was that. She never asked me, or I would’ve told her. I know the stories of kids who protected their parents even after abuse, but I wasn’t one of them. I guess I never bonded with them because they never took care of me. It’s hard to love someone who doesn’t even remember you exist half the time.”
“How could they believe your mother when there was evidence to the contrary? Isn’t the whole job of DCFS to advocate for the child?”
Hadley patted his leg as if to calm him down, which was sweet and a little heartbreaking at the same time. “They’ve gotten better at it, but back then, they made a lot of mistakes. Many kids fell through the cracks, and I was one of them. But another teacher contacted them when I was nine. I’d stolen another kid's lunch, and when she caught me, I told her I was so hungry I hadn’t known what else to do. She believed me, and so she fed me first, then called the authorities, and this time, they did remove me from my parents’ home. I was sent to a group home, where I met my brothers.”
Ah, that was how they had met. Sebastian had wondered about it, but he hadn’t felt comfortable asking about that either.
“I was terrified when I came into the group home, but three boys befriended me and protected me from the bigger kids and the bullies. They became my best friends, my brothers. A year later, a couple chose to foster me with the intent to adopt. They were wonderful, and I loved being with them, even if I did miss my brothers. But on the day I was supposed to go home with them indefinitely, they…”
His voice broke, and Sebastian’s throat grew tight. Something awful must’ve happened, and his heart went out to that little boy.
“They told me they were expecting a baby, which was a miracle, since the doctors had told her she couldn’t get pregnant…and so the adoption was off. I learned the hard lesson that day that people can’t be trusted and that promises can be broken. I cried over it, and I’ve never cried since. People aren’t worth my tears.”
God, that poor, poor little boy. What a cruel way to crush his heart, his hopes, his dreams. “But you cried just now.”
“Yeah, I did. I don’t know why. Maybe because these are happy tears, good tears. I’m crying because this is so beautiful and magnificent it’s beyond words and because you did this for me. I know the money is nothing to you, but still, you did this for me. You arranged it and thought of it, and I’m just…” He wiped his eyes. “I’m crying, is what I’m doing.”
Oh, the words were on the tip of his tongue, those three little words he wanted to say so badly, but he couldn’t. Not now. Not when this moment needed to be about Hadley and his emotions. Not when what Hadley had just explained so perfectly why he wanted to keep things casual.
And so Sebastian took a deep breath and kissed the top of Hadley’s head, woolen hat and all. “I’m so grateful and happy to share this with you.”
They sat for a long time, just the two of them, under that magical sky.
27
It had taken Hadley a long time to fall asleep after witnessing that wondrous spectacle. Even in bed, with Sebastian already asleep next to him, the wonder of it all kept playing through his mind, the vastness and grandness. How strange to feel honored and privileged that he’d gotten to see that. His heart had felt so full, and now, the morning after, that hadn’t changed.
They’d availed themselves of the bountiful breakfast buffet again and were now packing up their things. Their flight wasn’t till later, and so they would leave their luggage in the hotel’s storage and hang around a few more hours.
“I can’t believe it’s time to leave.” Hadley packed his last things into his weekend bag. “This was a magical weekend.”
“I’m so glad you enjoyed it.” Sebastian zipped up his own suitcase. “And by the way, we need to get you a decent suitcase. Airlines throw luggage around like they’re footballs, and you need something that’ll protect your stuff better.”
Hadley frowned. “For what? It’s not like I’m traveling again anytime soon.”
“I may have more trips planned.”
“Business trips?”
Sebastian shrugged, avoiding his eyes. “Business trips or I might whisk you away for another weekend like this.”
“Sebastian…”
Finally, Sebastian met his gaze. “It’s my money, Hadley. If I want to spend it on doing something with you, that’s my choice.”
“I’m not debating that. All I wanna say is that it sounds like a hell of a lot more than just sex to me. In fact, it’s dangerously close to a—”
“Friendship. Are you saying I can’t treat my friends to a trip?”
Friends. Sebastian kept repeating that was what they were, friends with delicious benefits. Maybe it was because Hadley didn’t have close friendships other than with his brothers, but what Sebastian did with him, how he treated Hadley, seemed so much more than mere friendship. Who bought trips to Iceland for their friends? Then again, maybe that was something rich people did. Fuck knew Sebastian could afford it, and Hadley didn’t feel guilty about the money. Why then did it still bother him?
He should let it go. The last thing he wanted was to cast a shadow over what had been such a special weekend. So he pushed down his uneasiness. “Of course you can. I didn’t mean to imply you couldn’t.”
“Good.”
The silence hung heavy in the room, and Hadley’s heart grew cold. Had he ruined it after all? “Are you upset with me?” he asked, his voice small.
Sebastian’s tight expression morphed into one much softer. “No. We’re good, I promise. I was just lost in thought.”
He took Hadley’s hand and pressed a kiss on it, then kissed his mouth as well. “Let’s drop off our luggage and find that hot tub.”
They changed into their swimming shorts in a changing room where they could put their clothes, shoes, and personal items in a locker. As soon as they set foot outside, Hadley shivered. “Fuck, this is cold,” he said between chattering teeth. “We’re insane!”
Sebastian just grinned, took his hand, and pulled him along. “It’s lovely once you’re in the water.”
The hot tub was empty, steam billowing up into the crystal blue sky. Hadley all but jumped into the water, then let out a moan. “Oh god, this is glorious.”
The water was not only warm, but it smelled good too. Fresh, with maybe a little pine? He wasn’t sure, but at least the cold no longer bothered him. He sat down on the ledge, only his head sticking out of the water, and Sebastian joined him.
“You were right. This is the most surreal experience,” Hadley said.
“It’s even better in one of the geothermal pools, and Iceland has many of them. The geology in this country is fascinating.”
“I’d think nothing much would grow here, considering the climate, right?”
“More than you’d expect. Root vegetables can take some cold and frost, but they also use greenhouses, often heated with geothermal energy, like water. The Icelandic people are pretty eco-friendly, all things considered.”
Huh. Interesting. “You know a lot about different things.”
Sebastian grimaced. “I know a little about a lot of things and a lot about a few things. Not quite the same.”
“Still, you have a much broader knowledge than me.”
“Exposure. That’s what it comes down to. My parents have always had a broad range of interests, so I was exposed to their knowledge from a young age. Add to that a private school, an excellent college and university, and access to all the books, magazines, and courses you can imagine, and it’s not that hard to get to where I am.”
Hadley cocked his head as he studied him. “You sound like you feel guilty.”
Sebastian hesitated, looking away. “After what you shared last night? I guess I do. I’ve always been aware how lucky I was, but hearing you went hungry for so long was…” He looked up, his eyes fiery now. “It does make me feel guilty, but above all, it makes me angry. Society failed you and many others. We’re supposed to take care of those smaller and weaker than we are, and we didn’t and still don’t.”
What the hell? Why were Hadley’s eyes tearing up all over again? He could hardly blame the tiredness now after a good night’s sleep. But what Sebastian said came from his heart, raw and unfiltered, so honest and pure that Hadley’s insides became as warm as his skin. He took Sebastian’s hand. “Thank you. Hearing someone acknowledge that, even when it wasn’t their fault, means a lot to me. It makes me feel seen and heard. Understood.”
Sebastian laced their fingers together. “I don’t think anyone who hasn’t been in similar circumstances can understand what you went through. But, Hadley, honey, I do see you and hear you. All of you.”
His voice held an edge, something so powerful and emotional that Hadley had to swallow to prevent it from sinking too deep inside him. “Thank you.”
He put his head on Sebastian’s shoulder, his mind a confusing mess of contradictory thoughts and feelings.
After the hot tub, they showered, then grabbed something to eat and headed to the airport.
“By the way,” Sebastian said as they walked into Keflavik Airport, “we’re making a stopover in Amsterdam, not in London, and we’ll be there for a few hours. I’m meeting up with Floris, an old college friend of mine, who agreed to come to the airport to hang out for a bit.”
“Oh, how nice that you get to see him. I’ll go entertain myself. I’m sure they have some shops, and I can always find a quiet corner to knit.”
Thoughtful as he was, Lagan had even packed some needles and yarn. He was such a sweetheart.
“No, I want you with me. It’s not just a social meetup. I want to talk to him about LeClerc.”
“Oh?”
Their conversation was interrupted when they checked in for their flight, then passed through security, but as soon as they were through all that, Hadley picked it back up. “What does an old college friend have to do with the company?”
“You’ll find out,” Sebastian said cryptically and dragged Hadley with him to an overpriced tourist shop where he bought him a framed picture of the northern lights and, despite Hadley’s protests, another knitted sweater. After that, he was a lot more careful about what he looked at for even longer than a second. Sebastian was watching him like a hawk to see what caught his interest.
It was sweet. Completely unnecessary and extra, but super sweet. But every time he wanted to protest, he reminded himself that this was how Sebastian showed his affection…and that he could afford it.
