Captain Silver Fox, page 16
Brantley eyed the massive king-size bed and the ginormous bathroom. “I concur.” He dropped his backpack on the floor and turned to Fox. “Let’s get some sleep. I didn’t sleep much on the plane either.”
They stripped down, clothes falling on the floor wherever they left him. Fox remembered to hang the do not disturb sign on the door, and then they crawled into bed. This time, Fox sought Brantley’s embrace and he held him close, wrapping his arms around him. They were face-to-face, their bodies completely entwined, and despite his tiredness and the circumstances, Brantley’s heart danced with joy that they were together.
“I can’t believe you came,” Fox whispered.
Brantley kissed his nose. “Of course I came.”
“No, not of course. You didn’t have to, and I didn’t expect you to.”
“I know, and you’re right. I wasn’t sure if I was overstepping,” Brantley admitted.
“Definitely not. I’ve never been happier to see anyone in my life as when I spotted you in that hallway.”
“Fox…” Brantley said, gathering the courage to say what was on the tip of his tongue.
Fox’s eyes filled up. “I don’t think he’s gonna make it,” Fox said, his voice so broken it stabbed Brantley through his heart. “The attack did massive damage to his heart, and he coded a few times during the surgery.”
“Oh baby,” Brantley whispered. “I’m so sorry.”
Fox cried silently, big tears rolling over his face, and all Brantley could do was hold him and caress his back, then wipe the wetness off his tear-stricken cheeks. “I’m so sorry,” he kept repeating because there was nothing else to say.
They fell asleep clinging to each other, and when Brantley woke up again, they were still in each other’s arms and Fox was looking at him with eyes full of…love. That’s how he looked at Brantley, with love in his eyes. It made the words come out easy now.
“I’m falling in love with you,” Brantley said softly. “I didn’t mean to, but it happened.”
A smile spread across Fox’s face. “I’m already in love with you,” Fox said. “More than I ever thought possible.”
Something clicked in Brantley’s heart, like puzzle pieces that fell into place. At the same time, a cold fear wrapped around his heart. This time, he would face it, he decided.
“I’m also scared,” he said.
“Scared of what? Of what happens when someone finds out?”
“No. Of what happens when things go wrong between us.”
“Brantley, I would never retaliate by threatening you with your job,” Fox said, and the hint of hurt in his tone was easy to spot.
Brantley took his right hand and kissed it. “That’s not it. Remember what I told you about my sister, how she died?”
Fox’s eyes softened. “Yeah.”
“She’d been depressed for years, but what made her take that final step was her boyfriend breaking up with her. They’d been together for a few years, and she thought at least that part of her life was good, was happy. It came out of nowhere when he ended things, and it pushed her over the edge. And I found her…”
“Oh my god… Baby, I’m so sorry…”
Brantley had to swallow before he could continue, but the love in Fox’s eyes gave him strength. “She left a letter for us, explaining that she’d tried to get over the heartbreak but she couldn’t. She had nothing left to live for.”
“And you’re scared that if things ever go wrong between us, you’ll feel the same way.”
Brantley nodded. “And I know it’s not fair to put that pressure on you. I know rationally it wasn’t her boyfriend’s fault that she killed herself. That’s not how it works. But it scares me to think I could ever feel that lost and hopeless.”
It was the first time that he’d voiced that fear to anyone, and now that he’d said it out loud instead of allowing it to occupy his brain, it didn’t sound right. It hadn’t been the heartbreak that had killed his sister. It had been her depression. The breakup had just been the last straw.
He wasn’t prone to depression, never had been. Even if things went south between them—and holy fuck, was he a Debbie Downer to bring this up right after Fox had told him he loved him—he’d never feel that dark and desperate. It wasn’t how he was wired.
“I’m sorry,” he said, feeling ten kinds of stupid now. It had to be the most unromantic reaction ever to a declaration of love.
“Sorry for what? If we are gonna make this work, we’ll need honesty between us. We have a lot going against us, baby, so I want you to be honest with me.”
God, that was the perfect response. Brantley’s heart went all soft and mushy. “I’m sorry for bringing this up right after you said something so wonderful.”
Fox cupped his cheek, his eyes shining. “You mean when I said I was in love with you?”
“Yes,” Brantley whispered. “And I ruined it by—”
“You didn’t ruin anything,” Fox said firmly. “You shared what was in your heart, and I’m glad I know. It helps me understand you.”
“It was why I turned you down that first time in that storage room.”
“Yeah, that makes sense now. So what made you change your mind?”
“The realization that I was already hurting by trying to stay away from you. You were all I could think about, and I figured that being with you had to be better than trying to be without you. I know that sounds super dramatic, but—”
“I think it sounds wonderful. I think it sounds exactly like my reasoning.” Fox pressed a soft kiss on Brantley’s lips. “You were in my blood from that first encounter, baby. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t let you go.”
“Same.”
Fox kissed him again, a longer kiss this time. “I know we need to talk about the future and all that, but could we please not right now? I need some good news. I need to enjoy the fact that you’re here and that we’re on the same page. Could we do that for now?”
Brantley nodded. “Sounds perfect to me.”
This time, he kissed Fox, then rolled on top of him to kiss him some more. The fire ignited slowly this time, a slow burn that built up with every deep kiss, every languid touch, every stroke and caress.
“I want to fuck you so badly, but I don’t have any lube,” Fox whispered. “I flew with carry on only, and I didn’t know you were coming.”
Brantley, still on top of him, looked down on him. “I did. Brought a few packets, since I figured we could get more here.”
Fox’s smile was wide. “Baby, this is Amsterdam. There’s literally condoms and lube everywhere.”
Brantley rolled off him to grab the lube from his backpack, then made his way back into bed. After some more kissing, Fox pushed him on his back, and Brantley spread his legs.
“I can’t believe you’re here,” Fox said again. “It’s like a dream to have you here with me right now.”
“Keep doing what you’re doing, and it’s about to become a really good dream.”
Fox smiled as he worked Brantley open with slick fingers, meanwhile kissing him until their lips were swollen and throbbing. When he entered him, he filled him slowly, making him feel every inch as he sank in all the way. The stretch danced on the edge of pleasure and burn, causing Brantley to break out in a sweat, his heart speeding up. When Fox bottomed out, he let out a low growl of pleasure that was hot and possessive and made Brantley want to take whatever Fox was about to dish out.
“You’re mine,” Fox said, and then they both smiled.
“I’m yours,” Brantley echoed.
Fox made a slow slide in and out of him, and even though he was on his back and technically speaking in a vulnerable position, Brantley had never felt stronger. This was his man, and he was balls deep inside Brantley, splitting him wide open with precise, deep strokes as only he could. He was taking care of Fox right now, and it triggered emotions in him he’d never felt before. Love. This was what love felt like, what making love felt like.
Fox pulled out again, adjusting his angle just so, and when he slid in again, he hit Brantley’s pleasure spot so perfectly he moaned way too loud. He clamped a hand over his mouth, but Fox grinned. “Moan all you want, baby. We’re not on board, and I don’t give a flying fuck what the neighbors think. For once, let me hear you.”
So Brantley did, though he doubted he would’ve even been able to keep quiet, what with how perfectly Fox was taking possession of him. That’s how it felt, as if he was being owned, possessed. Brantley’s ass clenched around Fox’s cock, needing him like it had never needed before. He had this slow rhythm that was agonizing and precise and perfect at the same time.
In, out. In, out.
He was the master of the slow fuck that had Brantley’s orgasm build up forever and ever until he was so on edge he couldn’t think anymore. His body rocked with every thrust, and the litany of moans that was falling off his lips would have been perfect for any porn movie. But god, it was so good. So fucking good.
And watching Fox lose himself was the best. His face was gleaming with sweat, his hair sticking up in every direction, his mouth slightly open, and those dark blue eyes of his were completely focused on Brantley. He made these sounds when he thrust, these growls and grunts that were almost animalistic and triggered some weird instinct in Brantley to submit. In between, he murmured words in Dutch whose meaning Brantley could only guess.
His own cock lay untouched, dripping furiously, but he didn’t dare reach for it. If he did, it would be over, his body already teetering on that brink. His body was coiled so tightly it hurt, his balls flush against his body, his skin on fire, and his nipples painfully hard. He was seconds away from begging. Undignified, humiliating begging to please, for the love of everything, speed up.
But he didn’t have to. Fox bent low over him, snapped his hips, and took him hard. “Oh fuck,” he growled, then again. “Oh, fuck!”
The last thrusts were deep and rough, hitting Brantley’s prostate full on, and he came with the force of a high wave slamming into him, crashing over him. Fox joined him, spurting his release inside him as he jerked and spasmed, then dropped on top of him like a dead weight. Brantley forced his exhausted, rubbery muscles into moving and wrapped his arms around him, holding him close.
“I want to stay like this all day, buried inside you,” Fox murmured.
Brantley kissed his shoulder. “Sounds like a plan to me.”
17
"I know this is moving fast, but I would love for you to meet my mom," Fox said after they had showered. “She's visiting my dad now with my brother, but she asked to meet us for dinner later."
Brantley didn't even need to think about it. "I'd love to."
Fox smiled broadly. "Thank you. Let me text my brother, who’ll be joining us as well. We’ll have dinner here at the hotel, since we’re all staying here."
Brantley hadn't realized Fox's family was staying in the same hotel. "Your parents and siblings, do they live far away from here?"
"My parents have a house in the north of the Netherlands but they're rarely there as they're usually on board their ship. So my brother moved into their house, since it's conveniently close to the Air Force base he's stationed at, and he’s rarely home as well. My sister lives in the Hague. But it's quite a drive to Amsterdam from either direction, so we all decided to stay in the same hotel. It has made things easier under the circumstances."
"I have no idea of the distances here," Brantley said. "All I know is that it's a small country, but I guess small is relative."
Fox nodded. "That busy traffic makes for long drives in terms of time, even if the distances aren’t that far. And the traffic around Amsterdam is pretty insane, especially during rush hour."
They'd found a comfortable spot to chat, lounging together on the couch in the living room part of Fox's suite. "Would you ever want to move back to the Netherlands?" Brantley asked.
Fox's answer came swift. "No. I love visiting here, and on some level, it will always feel like home, but I've outgrown this country. It's too small for me, too crowded. I need more space around me, room to live and breathe."
"But you live in Miami when you're on shore," Brantley said. "That's not exactly wide-open spaces either."
"I have an apartment in Miami. I don't live there. I usually travel quite a bit during my ten weeks off. I always spend two weeks in the Netherlands, and then I rent an AirBnB somewhere near the ocean. The Chesapeake Bay, the South Carolina coast, Northern California, Oregon, I've seen it all."
Brantley smiled. "You need to be near the water."
Fox hummed in agreement. "The ocean steadies me. I can't explain it, but being near her quiets my soul."
Fox's phone rang, startling them both. He paled as he looked at the screen, then answered the call, blindly reaching for Brantley's hand. He held it as Fox said something in Dutch, hoping with all his might that it wouldn't be bad news. Seconds later, he had his answer as Fox's face lit up. Brantley didn't need a translator to understand the sheer joy in his voice.
When Fox hung up, tears glistened in his eyes, but they were good tears. That was clear from his beaming face, and the relief in his eyes. "My dad woke up just now. He's awake!"
"I'm so happy for you, baby. What a relief," Brantley said, then held Fox close as he sought his presence, his body shaking.
"I was so scared," Fox whispered against his ear. "I thought I was going to lose him, and I wasn't ready yet."
Brantley, who had firsthand experienced a thing or two about grief, knew one was never ready for it, but he didn't say anything. Instead, he let Fox express his relief, holding him tight.
They went back to the hospital, where Brantley offered to stay in the waiting room again while Fox visited his father.
"I want you to meet him," Fox said.
Brantley stepped in for a kiss. "Baby, he just woke up. There's time. Allow him to meet me when he's recovered a little."
With a sigh, Fox relented, and Brantley spent half an hour chatting with Froukje, who’d offered to keep him company, which he’d gladly accepted. She was fun to talk to, and they quickly bonded over funny stories about passengers—in his case—and patients—in her case. Turned out, both could be equally oblivious, and they shared some good laughs. Her English was good, though she made similar word order mistakes he often detected in his crew members from Germany, Denmark, or The Netherlands.
"You're good for him," she said.
He smiled at her, pleased with that. "I hope so. He's good for me, that much I know."
"I must admit that I was a little worried when I met you this morning. You are much younger than him, and I was concerned that you were with him for the wrong reasons."
Brantley kept himself from smiling too broadly. This was that Dutch directness Fox had warned him about. Call him crazy, but he preferred it to having to guess what she thought of him.
"You thought I was a gold digger?" he asked her. Her frown told him that was an English expression she was unfamiliar with, so he explained it to her. "Did you think I was with him for the money or his status?"
"The thought had crossed my mind. Or just to have a good time, but I kind of dismissed that one, because you wouldn't have flown halfway across the world if that was the case."
"I'm in love with him," Brantley said, the words falling from his lips so much easier now. "I didn't plan it, and I certainly didn't want to, not after I discovered he was my boss. But he's the one my heart has settled on, so that's it."
"He loves you too," she said, and her smile showed her affection for her brother. "I already knew that after he told me how you two had met, but it was even more obvious when I saw him just now. I don't know what you two did in between…" Brantley sent her a cheeky smile that made her giggle. "And I don't want to know, but you make him happy, and that's all that matters."
Taking a page from her book, Brantley decided to tackle something that had been in the back of his mind. "You guys weren't hoping he'd settle down with a woman?"
Froukje shrugged. "Honestly, it didn't matter much to me. And I don’t think my parents care either. They are the rare unicorns amongst parents of their generation: they've fully accepted Fokke the way he is. Honestly, I think they're gonna be elated he's finally found someone, and they couldn't care less whether you have male or female body parts, or both or neither."
After she'd taken that so well, he might as well bring up the other thing. "And the fact that I'm so much younger than him?"
She leaned forward, meeting his eyes head-on. "That will take some getting used to, if I'm honest. Look, Brantley, I am fifty. I have a son your age, so it's gonna take me a little while to see you as an equal, if that makes sense."
That stung a little, and yet at the same time, he was glad he'd asked. Now he didn't have to wonder, and considering how nice she had been, he would win her over over time. "I understand. All I'm asking is for you to give me a chance."
She gave him a friendly smile. "You keep my brother happy, and I'll give you all the chances in the world."
Dinner that night was wonderfully relaxed. Fox's mother was a tall, lean woman with the exact same eyes her son had. She kissed Brantley on each cheek when she met him, and just when he thought she was done, added a third kiss which had him flustered for a bit. Apparently, that was a Dutch thing. Her English was limited, but Fox and his brother and sister translated back and forth where necessary, and Brantley made sure to speak clearly and use simple words.
Fox's brother was friendly as well, if a bit reserved. But he clearly made an effort to include Brantley in the conversation, maybe aided by the constant mushy looks Fox sent in Brantley's direction. It made him grin a little, how obvious Fox was in expressing his emotions now that they'd gotten them out in the open. He looked like a lovesick puppy, and Brantley loved it.
Then he realized it couldn't last, and he sobered. What would happen once they returned to the Athena? There was no way they could keep this a secret, not when they could barely keep their hands off each other. Not when Fox showed his affection for Brantley so clearly.
