Always Have, Always Will, page 18
The love of my life has been away from me for barely an hour and I already miss her. However long this takes will be more difficult than when she asked for space. Now I know the curves of her body, the feel of her soft skin beneath my fingertips, and the caress of her pouty lips on mine. How she makes me feel is something I’m never willing to forgo.
In this moment, I make one compelling decision. Even though I should talk to Caroline first, I forge ahead. That isn’t accurate. I’m gathering information, I’ll talk to her before I send my resignation letter.
I peek my head into the kitchen and ask Collette to step into the office when she can. Lunch service in the early summer on a Sunday is hit or miss. It could be moderately busy or terribly slow depending on the weather. Today is slow considering it’s a balmy seventy degrees with puffy clouds.
I mentally go over the checklist Gordon gave me when he sent me to Ocean Cliff: hire a head chef, fix the kitchen staff, make sense of the vendors, and decrease errors in ordering both food and front of the house linens.
“You wanted to see me, Chef?”
I smirk. “You don’t need to call me chef, Collette. Have a seat.”
“This can’t be good.” Her tone sounds concerned.
“Our conversation is only indirectly about you. It’s mostly about me. As I explained, Gordon wants me to overhaul this location. I have handled the majority if his requirements. All I need from you is an estimate as to when you’ll be happy with your kitchen staff.”
“Is everything all right, Auggie?”
“No, not at all. I have some family issues going on right now which are forcing me to make serious decisions about my career and life before I planned on making them.”
“Is Caroline pregnant?”
An image of Caroline with a cute baby bump flashes into my mind. It’s a vision I can definitely see in our future. A beautiful baby with her eyes, her smile, and my dark hair. “No, not yet.” She deserves an engagement ring first—one I plan to design sooner rather than later.
“To answer your question, I need two weeks, assuming Xavier works out as the new prep cook.”
“Okay. Also could you prepare the items you want to add to the menu for sampling either tomorrow or Tuesday before lunch service?”
“Sure, no problem. I hope everything works out for you, Auggie.”
“Thanks.”
Collette rises from the chair and leaves the office. Instead of bothering Caroline while she’s driving, I type out the first draft of my letter on my laptop. Near the end of lunch service, I walk through the kitchen to observe. For the most part, the staff is heeding Colette and things are running smoothly. I consider staying on through the beginning of dinner but decide against it. I have work to do for our future, and I won’t do it here.
“Do you want me to prepare something before you leave, Auggie?” Collette asks.
“No thanks. I’m not hungry yet. If you need anything, feel free to call. Otherwise, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Collette nods, and I walk out the door. The walk to the cottage takes a bit longer because my pace is much slower than normal. Despite the work I plan to do, I’m not in a rush to be alone, literally and with my thoughts. My phone chiming pulls me out of my head.
Caroline: I’ve arrived at Billie’s house to pick up a key.
I call her instead of responding.
“Hey.”
“Hey. Are you sure Margaux doesn’t know where Billie’s condo is?”
“Not sure but ask Billie. If you change your mind, let me know. I figured you would want the privacy of the condo.”
“I also don’t want to intrude on your family’s privacy either. Billie and Peter are newlyweds. Sam and Savannah recently moved here. Cash and Noelle brought the twins home.”
“You wouldn’t be intruding, although I understand why you feel you might be.” It was my suggestion she use the condo instead of staying with one of my siblings, even though my gut tells me she shouldn’t be alone. I know she can take care of herself, but if I can avoid my woman dealing with my mother alone again, I will. I also see how she wouldn’t want to choose among them as well.
“Where are you?”
“I’m walking back to the cottage. I want to talk about a few things after you get to the condo.”
“Okay, such as?”
“The timing of my resignation, where we want to live, and how to handle my mother’s interference in my search for a location. Plus anything you want to share about your research.”
I hear a soft sigh float between us. “How do you know about my research?”
“You left your laptop open. I’m proud of you for considering it.”
“Thank you. I’ll call you back after I settle in. Love you.”
Sharing our feelings freely and out loud is better than I ever imagined. “Love you more.” I end the call and climb the rear steps of the cottage.
Even though I didn’t cook anything, I shower off my shift. I emerge with a better attitude and fresh clothes. With a water in hand, I get comfy in the chair near the French doors and review my letter. Focusing on the letter instead of memories of making love to Caroline in this chair is more difficult than I anticipate. So much so I move and set up at the kitchen island.
After another thorough review, I send a copy to Caroline at her new email address. While I wait, I pull up the listing for restaurants and land in my desired locations. Within minutes I’m frustrated and walk away from the screen. Maybe I should consider the offer from the culinary institute to teach. I’m not opposed to teaching, but I also want to have my own location and capture my wild, outlandish dream of earning a Michelin star. I pace the length of the living room and consider going for a run. I text Caroline so she won’t worry.
Me: I need to run off some of this tension. I’ll call you when I get back. Love you.
I grab my sneakers and lace up, take my key and my phone, and rush out the door. A half dozen miles or so will definitely help. I set my pace and take off down the road, hopefully leaving some of this angst embedded into the pavement.
Chapter Thirty Seven
Caroline
I haven’t moved from the driver’s seat of Auggie’s car. It takes Billie tapping on the window to bring me back to my senses.
“Come in, Caro.”
Opening the door, I step into Billie’s hug. “Sorry, this is a lot.”
“I know. Anything with my mother is.”
I follow her up the wide stairs, step out of my shoes, and enter their gorgeous home. Peter comes around the corner from the office.
“Hi, Caroline. How are you?”
“I’ve been better, but I suppose a condo with an ocean view isn’t the most awful place to hide out from your boyfriend’s evil mother and my own mother. Sorry, Billie, no offense meant.”
“Hell no! Don’t apologize for stating my mother is evil incarnate. You’re absolutely correct. I have to admit, hearing you call my brother your boyfriend is pretty amazing!”
A huge smile spreads across my face. “Thanks. I agree.”
“How long will you be here?” Peter asks.
“Alone? I’m guessing about two weeks.”
Billie starts jumping up and down. “Yay! You’ll be here for the next girls’ night. As far as I know of those who live here, only Gen isn’t coming.”
Genevieve Cavallaro is Billie’s sister-in-law. I’ve only been around her a few times, and I wasn’t impressed. She seems so sullen all the time and generally unpleasant. I won’t miss her.
I have been to one of these before. They’re fun and a great way to catch up with the ladies. “Sweet. Where and when?”
“Kelly’s on Friday night.”
“I’m in.”
Billie laughs. “Do you need anything?”
I’m kind of afraid to ask. “Does your mother know where your condo is?”
“Not that I’m aware of. When she shows up, it’s at the shop. You can always stay here so you aren’t alone.”
“I appreciate it, but I’ll only be alone at night. During the day, I plan to see the twins, steal Emme from daycare and hit the beach, bother you at the shop, and hang out at the Perk. I’ll be fine.”
“Your itinerary sounds like a perfect summer vacation.” It’s my plan anyway. Ideally Auggie will join me for some of it, sooner rather than later.
“That was my plan before I lost my job, but my job is a topic for another day.”
“Good for you.” Billie hands me the keys to the condo.
“Thanks. Will you be in the shop tomorrow?”
“Yup, we’re appointment only now, so use this code to enter through the back door.” She scribbles the number on a scrap of paper.
I pocket the paper. “Thank you so much.”
“You’re family. You have been since you were ten, and since my brother wised up, I think you will be for a long time to come.”
I smile, hug her and Peter, and return to Auggie’s car. I check my messages before driving off. Auggie sent a text indicating he was going for a medium length run. Medium means at least six miles for him. Me, run, NEVER!
I take the short drive to the condo, pull into the assigned parking spot, and haul my stuff into the elevator. I don’t even bother unpacking anything. I uncork the bottle of wine on the island and sit on the balcony to relax. The waves crashing against the sand is equally as soothing as the bottle of merlot from Billie’s wine rack.
Halfway through my glass, my phone rings. “Hi.”
“Hi, sweetheart. How was your drive?”
“It was fine. I talked to Nana.”
“Was it helpful?”
Nana is my sounding board aside from Auggie. Normally we catch up about my students and Auggie. Lately it has been more about dealing with Margaux and my mother. “She didn’t tell me anything we haven’t already discussed. Can you turn on your video? This will be easier if I can read you.” I push the video button and wait for Auggie to accept.
“Better?”
The second I drove away, I started missing him. Now seeing his face through my phone makes it even more pronounced. “Much.”
“After you left….”
I frown.
“I don’t mean it that way.”
“I know. It’s still raw, I guess. I’m sorry. Please continue.”
“Cuore mio, the absolute last thing I want right now is to be away from you. I thought we agreed.”
“We did. I don’t want separating from you to be the right choice. Please continue.”
“I understand. I spoke with Collette. She needs about two weeks to be comfortable here. With the information in mind, I drafted my letter of resignation. I sent it to you. Did you read it?”
“No, I didn’t read it yet. It’s exactly what Nana suggested. Take 1459 Fifth out of play. It won’t make finding a location easier if Margaux is still working against you. What is your plan?”
“I’m going to send the letter and then meet up with my mother in the city.”
I try to tamp down my harsh words but fail. “Are you out of your damn mind?”
He pushes out a jagged breath. “No, hear me out. The longer I thought about it, the clearer the right choice became. I refuse to be under my mother’s control in any way. The fact Gordon failed to tell me about the lease and uncovering Mother is his landlord was the final piece. Plus, when I spoke with my father, I pointedly inquired about my trust.”
My mind spins with possibilities, but I manage a question. “Why?”
“It’s another way for her to control my life. I was going to ask for it to be released early to further distance myself from her. Somehow my father negotiated control of my trust away from her in the divorce settlement.”
“I’m surprised she went for it.”
“Me too. I plan to ask Gordon for discretion until I can speak with my mother.”
“What is your goal for speaking with her?” I don’t know if there’s a correct answer to this question. The only thing I know is I don’t want to be anywhere near her. I refuse to let that woman rattle me again. It’s enough I may need to go testify.
“Her actions were reprehensible, and I need to tell her face-to-face. I want her to leave us alone.”
My chest tightens. “After that?”
“I’m coming to stay with you. I’m confident you’re safe from my mother in Maine, even without personal security. What have you decided about work?”
I never considered what our life would actually look like. I knew he wanted to own a restaurant and staying in the city wouldn’t be an option. As long as we’re side by side, I don’t care where we are.
“When everything happened, I spoke with Noelle. She indicated we should talk about working for her. I plan on talking to Noelle in the next few days. However, I also plan on talking to Cash. I want to chase my dream at the same time.”
“I’m so proud of you, sweetheart.”
“Don’t jump too far ahead. It’s only talking right now.”
“I know, but it’s a huge deal. I know because I made the same huge decision myself.”
Auggie is the only person who always believes in me, even when I don’t believe in myself. “Thank you.”
“Can you get your laptop and review the letter?”
“Sure.” I shift on the couch and return inside. After gathering my laptop and a throw blanket, I return outside and start to set up the computer.
“That’s dirty, sweetheart.”
I glance down and realize I flashed him while setting up the laptop. “Sorry. I wouldn’t tease you on purpose.”
“Are you sure about that?”
I wrinkle my nose. “Before now, yes. Now I may do it to make you squirm. I kind of like the power of it.” I wink at him.
“Is that how it’s going to be until I can hold you again?”
I smirk. “Maybe.” I boot my laptop and download the letter. After a thorough read, I say, “It’s good, Auggie.”
“What should I change?”
“Nothing. The tone of the letter is professional and doesn’t share your disdain for Gordon and his actions. It’s fine the way it is.”
“I’ll send it tomorrow and call him as well.”
I sigh and glance up at the sky.
“What else is on your mind?”
The level he sees me is unnerving. “Nothing you don’t already know.”
“I hate she put that look in your eyes.”
“It isn’t your fault. Honestly, I hoped she would have wised up by now. She isn’t going to find anything. It doesn’t worry me. What’s next when Margaux doesn’t get the result she wants?”
Auggie nods. “I completely understand those feelings. I don’t know the answer. I wish I did. Ideally, talking to her face-to-face will be enough, as well as leaving the city. Standing up to her worked eventually for my siblings. I need to do it for us.”
I see his point. Margaux hasn’t bothered any of them, including not showing at either wedding or at the hospital when Emme or the twins were born. “Maybe I should be with you.”
“No, absolutely not!” His tone is fierce, protective, and steadfast. “I don’t ever want you near her again. I won’t be able to control my anger if you’re beside me. I’m not sure I’ll be able to even if you’re not.”
My heart drops to my toes. He’s willing to face his mother alone to protect me from ever having to see her again. If I weren’t already deeply in love with August Morgan, I would be now. With my realization, all I can do is nod. “I should turn in. I already wish you were here. I love you, always have.”
“Me too. I love you, always will. Good night, Caroline.”
“Good night, Auggie.” I end the call and exhale slowly. Like him, there is no end I wouldn’t chase to protect him from my family either.
Chapter Thirty Eight
August
After a sleepless night where my thoughts vacillate between missing Caroline, my future with her, my restaurant locations, and dealing with my mother, I roll out of bed near nine. I brew a cup of coffee and go through everything I need to do to start our life together. I review my letter of resignation once more.
Before I hesitate any longer, I send the letter and dial Gordon.
“Good morning, Auggie. How’s it going at Ocean Cliff?”
“Gordon. Collette is doing well. The kitchen is making great strides. The reason for my call is twofold. First, Collette has some menu items she wants to add. Before I agree, I wanted to clear it with you.” There’s no reason for him to say no. We trained at the same school. Her skills are equal to mine, although she leans a bit more toward American cuisine while I lean more French.
“I don’t have a problem with it as long as you test the menu before you return.”
“Fine. It leads me to the second part of this call. I emailed you my letter of resignation.” I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.
Silence greets me for a few long moments. “Is there anything I can do to change your mind?”
I like the dejection in his voice. There’s also an indication he knew this was coming. No one told him, only his business decisions led me here.
“No, there isn’t. You weren’t upfront with me about the lease, the menu changes, and the decrease in patronage, but you used me to fix Ocean Cliff. I understand its part of my contract, but it doesn’t mean I have to like it. Your lack of due diligence regarding the owner of your lease also gives me pause. I specifically inquired, and you indicated the lease was held by a company unaffiliated with my parents. It’s why I took your offer despite it being less lucrative for me personally than others I had at the time. When Greenleaf acquired the lease, you should have informed me. I was clear I didn’t want any affiliation with my parents’ business interests. Instead you withheld the information for over a year.”
“I understand. I appreciate your professionalism and handling of Ocean Cliff as required by your employment contract. It was never my intention to deceive you, at least as it pertains to the ownership of the lease. I willfully failed to disclose my inability to pay our lease for months though.”
“Thank you. In the interest of being candid, I plan to speak with my mother about my employment at 1459 Fifth, the lease, and a few other family issues which don’t pertain to you. However, I don’t know how she’ll react. It may expedite the eviction. I would appreciate your discretion as you search for a new chef if it’s the route you decide to take.”
